You can make it through

Zhang Yang sat in front of his home address for a long time. After getting his mood together, he walked slowly to the side room where Zhang Li was once locked up by the second uncle's house. Everything that can be broken by kicking.The fear and guilt engraved in my heart when I was young will not be reduced, but at least I will not use amnesia to escape in the future.

When he wandered back, it was already very late, and most of the villagers had already turned off the lights and gone to sleep.All four members of Zhang Sanxiao's family were fast asleep, and Zhang Sanxiao's snoring could be heard across three rooms.

He lay on the bed and flipped through the materials he brought, but he couldn't read a single word.There were turbulent waves in his body, beating his heart violently.He couldn't calm down, he desperately needed someone to talk to him.He dug out the spare phone from his backpack and opened it. On the original narrow screen, there was the latest text message from Li Dongyao: "I order you as a benefactor, you are not allowed to hang up on my phone indiscriminately in the future."

He looked at the message and laughed for a long time, and finally pressed "2".

The phone was connected after eight rings.

"If something really happens to me, you're so slow, I'm probably dead!" Zhang Yang expressed his dissatisfaction aggrieved.

"Grandpa, it's 10:30 U.S. time, and I was in a meeting just now." Li Dongyao explained.

"Then, you go to the meeting." Zhang Yang said deliberately, he knew that Li Dongyao would not go.

"What's the matter with you?" Li Dongyao asked directly.

Zhang Yang fell into silence, obviously he had a lot of words in his chest.

"Did something happen?" Li Dongyao changed to a quiet place, and there was no noise on the phone.

"Now, it should be night on your side. Why, can't sleep?" Li Dongyao's voice was very pleasant on the phone, deep and soothing, a little magnetic, with a little ABC accent.

"Li Dongyao—" Zhang Yang slowly called out his full name.

"Well, I'm listening." Li Dongyao responded gently.

"My sister and I have never had a good relationship. We are like strangers. We have nothing to say, and we are very polite when we meet. I bought her a house, but she doesn't even want it." Zhang Yang was silent for a while before speaking.

Li Dongyao didn't know why Zhang Yang was talking about his sister at this time, so he didn't interrupt him, and continued to listen patiently.

"Today I sent a WeChat message to my sister, and apologized to her, saying I'm sorry. She said, don't blame me for what happened before." Recalling Zhang Li's words again, Zhang Yang choked up and didn't know how to continue.He stopped and covered his mouth, not wanting Li Dongyao to hear his emotions.

But it was too late.Li Dongyao heard the choking, heard his undulating breathing because of the choking, and heard his sad gasp.His chest seemed to be stabbed slowly with a knife, and the pain spread from the skin to the internal organs.

"I've been looking for the reason why my sister suddenly doesn't like me. I've been looking for a long time. I've been searching since I was a child, but I can't find it. I know that I must have done something wrong to make her like that, but I can't find what I did wrong. " Zhang Yang managed to suppress his choked sobs, and attacked him again.He had to stop.

Li Dongyao didn't speak, just waited quietly, waiting for him to calm down.

"It turns out that I did something wrong. Not only did I do something wrong, but I also avoided it. I even lost my fucking memory!" Zhang Yang was already crying.

Li Dongyao heard his suppressed crying, he guessed that he must have covered his mouth desperately to keep himself from crying.He called him: "Zhang Yang, Yang Yang." Over and over again, softly and gently, with his empathy and unspeakable distress.

Under his call, Zhang Yang gradually stopped crying.He asked him: "It turns out that people really have selective amnesia, remember the good ones, forget the bad ones, and live in deception. Do you think it's ridiculous?"

Li Dongyao took a deep breath, and answered him solemnly and affirmatively: "It's not funny, it's not funny at all!"

"Really?" Zhang Yang asked softly.

"Human instinct is to seek advantages and avoid disadvantages. No one wants bad things. The same goes for bad memories. Human life is short, and there are not many happy things. Why do we have to keep those bad things You have forgotten those bad memories, there is nothing wrong, nothing wrong at all. You are not trying to escape, but to protect yourself. A person who wants to protect himself is not ridiculous at all." Li Dongyao wanted to finish the following words: "Not only is it not funny, it also makes me feel very distressed." But he didn't dare to finish, he was afraid that Zhang Yang would hang up the phone immediately if he finished.He is a hedgehog!

After Zhang Yang heard this, he didn't make a sound for a long time.Li Dongyao thought he was asleep and asked him, "Are you okay?"

"Do you want to know what memories I have selectively forgotten?" Zhang Yang asked proactively.

"That must be a bad memory." Li Dongyao said: "If you want to say it, I'm willing to listen. If you will be sad, I don't want to hear it."

Li Dongyao spoke slowly, gently, and sincerely. Zhang Yang was not a cold-blooded animal, he could feel his sincerity and worry.

"You really look like a psychiatrist!" Zhang Yang said with a smile, he knew he shouldn't say that at this time, but he said it anyway.

Li Dongyao was anxious: "It's you and me!" If it were someone else, he might not have the patience.

"You are a very good benefactor father!" Zhang Yang deliberately emphasized the word "benefactor".

Li Dongyao was very upset, but there was nothing he could do about it.Zhang Yang was always consciously remembering to draw the boundary between the two of them.Damn the nurturing contract, Li Dongyao scolded himself a hundred times in turn.

The two fell silent at the same time.

Zhang Yang picked at the old wood at the head of the bed, and inserted his fingers into the cracked wood, until his fingertips were prickled by the wooden thorns inside.He withdrew his finger and heard Li Dongyao asking him in a frustrated voice: "You, do you still want to talk?"

Zhang Yang inserted his finger into the crack of the wood again, and after pulling it in and out a few times, he replied: "You said, everyone wants to throw away bad things. I decided to throw it away."

After saying these words, Zhang Yang felt his body became lighter.Let those bad memories be sealed forever.Anyway, the people and things in memory have all passed away.The damage is there from the moment the memory is produced.It doesn't disappear because the memory fades, nor does it aggravate because the memory exists.Those who have done harm have also been punished.And he and his sister Zhang Li are working hard to move forward, this is enough!

Li Dongyao smiled reassuringly on the phone.Although the two have not known each other for a long time, he has seen many appearances of Zhang Yang before he knew it.Some are in movies, some are in life, some are eccentric, some are hypocritical, some are infatuated, some are ruthless, some are happy and some are sad.This Zhang Yang tonight is fragile, which makes him sad and makes him feel distressed.Just like the night when he was drunk, when he told him that Li Xurong didn't love him.Zhang Yang has thorns all over his body, but he is by no means strong.

"Well, it's best to forget all the bad things, people have to remember something good!" He wondered when Zhang Yang would remember his good things.

"Father of the gold master, I have decided to listen to you, and I will not hang up on your phone indiscriminately in the future." Zhang Yang suddenly reassured him.

"Why, conscience found out?" Li Dongyao forced a smile.

"I'm afraid you will say that I breached the contract, what should I do if I terminate the contract early?" Zhang Yang became frivolous again.

Just by hearing his voice, Li Dongyao could already imagine his expression at the moment, it must be full of false flattery.

"That depends on your performance! I'm not satisfied with your performance recently." Li Dongyao imitated him.

"I'll change it right away."

"How to change?"

"How do you want me to change?"

"Call 'Brother Dongyao' in a coquettish way"

"nausea."

"Call!"

Zhang Yang had to mobilize his actor's instincts, but after deliberating for a long time, he still couldn't open his mouth and shout "Brother Dongyao".He remembered that he heard Brother Dongyao called by others on the phone that day, and he got goose bumps all over his body.

"Can I change it?" He begged him pitifully.

"not good."

"..." Zhang Yang managed to accumulate some good feelings for him just now, and was completely defeated by "Brother Dongyao" in an instant.He thought about it and decided to change it.

"Father, the gold master, have you tried phone love?"

When Li Dongyao responded, Zhang Yang on the phone had let out a contrived long gasp.

"I'm thinking about the gold master father, you are simmering (zi) and simmering (wei)!"

Zhang Yang seemed to be talking with his mobile phone in his mouth, and the sound of swallowing saliva was obvious.Li Dongyao knew he was acting!

"Hmm~ It's very big, so hot~" Zhang Yang began to speak lasciviously.

"I'm going to a meeting, you take your time." Li Dongyao finished speaking coldly, and hung up the phone.

Zhang Yang felt that he had played too much, and Li Dongyao seemed to be angry. He had never spoken to him in such a tone.He sat up from the bed, held the phone in his arms and hesitated, and finally pressed a text message to ask him: "Are you angry?"

As soon as the text message was sent successfully, Zhang Yang regretted it again.Unfortunately, unlike WeChat, text messages can also be withdrawn.He comforted himself and said that it was better than being rejected by the donor, and his dream of being an actor still depends on others.

Li Dongyao returned to the meeting room, just sat down and didn't listen to a few words, when he saw the text message from Zhang Yang on his mobile phone, he couldn't help but smile triumphantly.

"What are you laughing at?" Xiao Huan, who was sitting next to him, asked him in a low voice.

"A fool was deceived by me!" Li Dongyao looked back at him, his eyes were dark and bright.

Xiao Huan smelled a conspiracy, and he warned him: "Concentrate on the meeting!"

Li Dongyao turned his head and continued to watch the PPT presentation. After watching, Zhang Yang's figure appeared on the screen. He stood in the middle and stared at him.Every time the director of the speech project turned a page, Zhang Yang on the PPT would change his expression, angry for a while, annoyed for a while, very tangled, and Li Dongyao laughed again.

The director who was concentrating on the speech was interrupted and asked him: "What's the matter, Mr. Li?"

Xiao Huan stepped on his foot.Only then did Li Dongyao come back to his senses, he waved his hands and said, "Go on!"

The director continued to talk, and Li Dongyao's thoughts continued to drift.Recently he met many actors, and an old American actor told him that in fact, everyone is a born actor and everyone can act.It's just that most people can't stand on the stage.For them, life is a show.Just like actors, in order to win awards or prove themselves, they work hard to act, and they also perform for various purposes.Li Dongyao wanted to play a scene in exchange for Zhang Yang's sincere one.