That Alien Feeling

Planet: Kaluvia

Harry had expected Korza to find a psychic to re-establish his bond—and he wondered where Korza could find someone who would do it and keep his mouth shut.But as soon as he got home, his question was answered—Kerza hadn't done it in someone else's hands, and he'd done it with such ease that Sean glares in disbelief.It's surprising that he could re-establish their bond without even being there, but Harry wasn't in the mood to find out just how capable his brother was. Go away and leave them arguing slowly.

The feeling of having a bond again...is weird.It didn't feel right at all, as if he'd been wearing a shirt that was too tight for years and was okay because he never took it off.But he'd tried to get out of it, and now, the discomfort of not being able to scratch it was driving him crazy.

Harry had kind of hoped that Bond would stop him from thinking about Adam, but he realized now how ridiculous his thinking was.Long before the bond disappeared, he had fallen in love with Adam.It appears that it is perfectly possible to "love" someone without being able to perceive sexual attraction.Harry's "love" for Adam is nothing like his love for his family, even with the areas of his brain associated with "sex attraction" locked up by bonds.With that "love" came raw desire, some kind of deep longing, but it felt like his brain was disconnected from his body.It felt like being thirsty but being gagged, and it was frustrating.

It didn't take Harry a second thought to block Rallen 'Heaney' Goole from his consciousness; otherwise she would surely think something was wrong with him.He also didn't want her to feel his resentment towards her.She did nothing wrong.Harry knew that.He shouldn't take out his frustration on her, that's not fair.

With that in mind, Harry even smiled at Leilan 'Heaney' Goole and her parents at the formal dinner that night.

"I'm glad you're back." She smiled at him across the table.

Harry looked at her.She is a soft beauty.From childhood to adulthood, they have always gotten along harmoniously and comfortably.That's all.Harry tried to imagine touching her, caressing her.But he couldn't imagine it.In fact, the thought of them doing that made his stomach sick.

Finally Harry gave up and concentrated on the food in front of him.People around were talking, but he didn't bother to notice.He couldn't hear it anyway.All sounds seemed vague and distant.For a moment, he suspected that something was wrong with his hearing.But then he took a sip of the almost tasteless soup and realized why: Kibon had suppressed all his senses, not just his telepathy and libido.

Harry sighed.It may take a while for him to get used to it again.

***

After returning to his home planet for a month, he developed a sense of burnout and became sluggish.Harry had never been a sick person, so he was a little surprised he couldn't eat.But when he thought about the bland food, he felt that it was inevitable.He tried hard to hide it, not wanting anyone to find out that something was wrong with him.He didn't want to attract the attention of his family.

Harry still didn't know how much his parents knew.They haven't talked to him deeply about him running away from home to go to Earth.Sannyashi doesn’t talk to him about it, though: his sister just shakes her head and says she’s glad he’s finally come to his senses.But having said that, Sang Yaxi lives with her husband in a scientific research colony a few light-years away, and is rarely at home.It is a bit unreasonable for his parents to avoid talking about it.Harry could sense her disapproval and disapproval whenever his mother looked at him, but she hardly ever talked to him about it.His father just told him in a joking tone not to be so muddled, and to say hello the next time he decides to disappear.

There was no punishment, which surprised Harry, but he didn't take it too seriously.He didn't know how Keza explained to his parents yet—he didn't care too much.In fact, Harry found it difficult for him to care about anything.He is indifferent to anything.numbness.Everything is so boring.The whole world is so boring.Tasteless and dull in color.

Logically, Harry understood that the bond was weakening his senses, but it didn't make him feel any better.It stands to reason that he should understand that he has been burdened with bondage almost all his life, and he can still live; but after experiencing how good and vivid everything can be, it is difficult to adapt to this boring thing-this boring life.He couldn't get used to bondage.He felt like something was wrong with him.

So, considering that he has been in a bad mood lately, he didn't pay much attention to the feeling of burnout and dullness.Maybe he's just in the process of adjusting.It will be fine.

It definitely will.

***

Months passed.The feeling that something was wrong worsened, the vague feeling of emptiness turned into a real pain.The pain came from deep inside his body, as if he had been twisted into a ball.His poor appetite had become impossible to hide.Harry barely had the strength to pretend everything was normal.Something happened to him.

One day Sean asked him why he was so pale and sick. "I think I'm dying," Harry replied.He wondered if he had contracted something on Earth that was slowly killing him.

For some reason, Sean was taken aback by his words.

"What's the matter with you?" He patted Harry on the head. "How can you say something like that like you don't care at all?"

Harry looked at him, a little surprised to realize that he really didn't care.He doesn't care if he lives or dies.That's not great, is it?

"I don't even recognize you!" Sean said, jumping up. "You used to be the most positive person I ever knew, always utterly optimistic about life, and now you're—" He didn't finish, narrowing his green eyes. "I see. K'za must have screwed up rebuilding the bond."

Harry wanted to tell him that he had guessed wrong and that everything was fine.But before he could speak, Sean stormed out of his room.

Harry sighed, wondering if he should follow, but it was too much energy for him to use now.

The door opened again.Harry was in a daze, not knowing how long it had been.

"Look at him!" Sean said. "When I left in the morning, he just slumped on the sofa and hasn't moved yet! Can't you see that there's a problem?"

Keza walked in after him, a completely unmoved expression on his face.Harry was a little surprised that Keza had been found by Sean.Harry hadn't seen him much lately.It's no surprise that Keza has always been a busy man, given his countless responsibilities.

"You shouldn't be messing with his mind," Sheen said. "You're not a professional spiritualist. You must have screwed up and made him look sick like this!"

"You don't need to shout so excitedly, I didn't 'mess up' anything." Keza said so, but then he frowned and looked at Harry. "Hachter?"

It took Harry a moment to realize that Keza was calling him. "Huh?" he replied slowly.

"See?" Sean said.

Keza narrowed his eyes.He looked at Harry carefully.

"Borg'gon, give Prince Harhet a full medical examination," Keza said.

"Scanning has been initiated." The artificial intelligence replied.

Harry shrugged, vaguely annoyed that he wasn't even asked if he wanted to be tested.But he also knew deep down that maybe it was the right thing to do.There must be something wrong with him.Lately he's felt as though... his life force is draining.

"How?" Keza stared at Harry closely.Shane was running around in a hurry.

Borg'gon replied: "Would you like to hear the result now, Your Highness?"

"Let Sean 'Enh' Wehli out first."

"I'm not going anywhere." Sheen came over, sat down beside Harry, and put an arm around his shoulder.

Harry tried not to curl himself up, or avoid Sean's touch.Sheen wasn't used to reassuring people with physical touch—they were the same as an entire race—but lately Sheen had been touching him a lot.This made Harry feel a little ashamed.He doesn't want to be pitied.

He wants nothing.

He just wanted to be alone and no one would talk to him.

Harry shuddered, trying to shake off the emotional thought.Sheehan was right: it was so unlike him.He's not this moody, sullen guy.

"Go ahead, Borg'gon," Sheen said.

"Sorry, Your Highness, but I cannot follow your instructions. Except for the Queen and Her Majesty, only the Crown Prince can obtain the medical reports of members of the Second Clan Royal Family."

Harry sighed and rubbed his face. "Leave Sheen, Keza. Borg'gon, tell me what's wrong with me."

"Do you agree too, Prince Keza?" Borg'gon asked.

Keza gave Sean a displeased look, but nodded. "Say it."

"The prince is not infected with an alien virus. Severe depression and severe malnutrition are affecting his health."

"So I'm fine?" Harry interrupted.He didn't like the AI's scanning capabilities, he thought it was a violation.

"I have not come to that conclusion, my lord," Borg'gon replied. "Malnutrition and depression are symptoms, not conditions themselves."

"What do you mean?" Keza asked.

Borg'gon replied cautiously: "Judging from his brain activity and hormone levels, the atavistic traits in Prince Hacht 'enkh' Chaali caused this condition."

Sean froze against Harry.

Keza frowned. "What?"

Harry frowned in confusion.Of course he had known for a long time that he was a "throwback", but he always thought it didn't matter.

Only a few know that a tiny fraction of their race possesses the biological traits of the Sur'k'tu.Sur'ke'tu people lived about 100 million years ago, a primitive race and one of their ancestors.The characteristics of the atavistic gene first appeared after the genetic experiments that caused the induction mutation; but unlike the induction mutation, the spiritual core fusion will not affect the variation of the physiological function, so everyone just ignores this problem does not exist.For the existence and details of atavistic people, the upper class always deliberately avoids talking about them.The only reason Harry knows anything about throwbacks is because he is one of them.

Biologically, atavistic peoples were very different from modern Kaluvians.Sur'k'tu are hermaphrodites, and although atavus are not hermaphrodites, they still secrete natural lubricants when in arousal.It never mattered to Harry.He still doesn't understand what effect this has.

"I don't see how this has anything to do with the problem at hand." Keza seemed to know what Harry was thinking.For all Harry knew of him, he might have peeked into his brain.

"Isn't that obvious?" Sean murmured.He leaned against Harry, motionless. "Science has confirmed that the Sur'k'tu people are very strict about mate selection. They only have one mate in their lives. Scientists believe this is why they eventually became extinct-they were too picky. If their mate died, they would die. will die alone."

Harry's heart skipped a beat.He blinked and stared at Sean, his ears buzzing.He doesn't understand.

"Yes," said the Borg'gon. "Furthermore, scientists from the Liviksu Society have confirmed that after the first mating, the bodies of the Sur'k'tu produce certain hormones that make their... bodies dependent on their mates." Listen to Borg'Gon It's a little awkward. "It's a very intriguing physiology that allows for reproduction and the continuation of the race. It's been theorized that this evolutionary trait was developed in response to the Deu'k'tu population boom. The Deu'k'tu Humans, a sentient subspecies of the ancient Kaluvians, invaded Sur'k'tu settlements. But it is known that there is not sufficient evidence that the Deu'k'tu ultimately wiped out the Sur'k'tu The U'k'tu. It is thought that the Sur'k'tu were eliminated in evolution and became extinct before the Deu'k'tu evolved into modern Kaluvians. But the atavistic There are instances of interbreeding between these two populations."

Harry shook his head, feeling dizzy.The words of the Borg'gon don't make sense. "But he's not—he's a Terran." He didn't even dare mention Adam's name.

Borg'gon said cautiously: "I don't think it matters, Your Highness. Although there is no precedent for interbreeding between Terrans and Kaluvians, the possibility exists."

Harry licked his lips and let himself imagine for a moment: a child with Adam's smile and dark eyes.His chest hurts because that's never going to happen.

"What's that got to do with Hachter?" Keza snapped. "My brother isn't a Sur'k'tu. They're long gone. He just happens to share some of their traits."

"There is uncertainty about the Sur'k'tu traits present in the atavistics. Some atavistics are barely different from most Kaluvians, and some atavistics show both. exhibits a variety of Sur'k'tu traits. Her Majesty Harhet may exhibit certain atavistic traits—"

"Bullshit," Keza said. "The Sur'k'tu may have been inseparable from their mates, but there's no scientific evidence that the atavs did. There's no precedent for that."

Sean smiled mockingly. "Of course there is no precedent. Unlike us, the Sur'k'tu can choose their own mates. The Atavisms don't have this opportunity. The first batch of Atavistics were recorded, and the "Binding Law" was introduced. gone."

"No one asks your opinion," Keza said.

Sean blushed with anger and glared at him. "I hate you." His voice was full of hatred. "I hope I can break up with you sooner."

Harry remembered that the bond between Sean and Keza was one-way.This was the first time he thought about it since he got home.Sean hadn't told anyone about Krsar's abnormal senses, and they must have reached some sort of consensus.possible.Harry wasn't sure.He didn't care that much about it, so he didn't ask.He felt cold all over.If he doesn't even care about Sean and Keza, how bad is his mental state?

"But Sean's right." Harry tried to get his head rolling.It's hard.It's hard to think.He can't concentrate. "For those who have not yet bonded, what is the chance that the rationed bond will be the one you want to choose? Too small."

"Maybe," Keza admitted.He didn't look at Sean.He looked at Harry. "Let's move on to the pressing issue at hand. Is it true that Hachter can't leave that Terran?"

Just hearing Keza mention Adam made Harry feel like he was dying inside.He tried desperately to keep his attention in the discussion,

"There is no precedent, I can only make this inference." Borg 'gong said. "But Prince Hacht's indicators are quite worrying. He may not die, but I think his physical and mental condition will continue to deteriorate." It paused. "Prince Keza, I have something to say and I don't know whether I should say it or not."

Keza nodded.

"I am concerned about the state of Prince Hacht's health, and I intended to inform you tonight. After he returned from his three-day trip, I took the liberty to observe his daily behavior. I found that his concentration level had deteriorated to the point where he needed to be alert Yesterday, he spent six and three hours in a daze without moving at all. I called him seven times before he responded. If His Highness's perception of the surrounding environment continues to deteriorate, it is very likely that he will eventually fall into a coma state, with only a sporadic awareness of his surroundings. I recommend giving him daily injections of Sur'k'tu hormone inhibitors to improve his reflexes and concentration. But this is not a long-term solution. Weak until ineffective."

Sean squeezed Harry's shoulders, worry hitting him like a wave.Harry was worried, too, and what he was worried about was that he wasn't too "worried" about his health.

"It's all caused by atavistic genes, are you sure?" Keza asked.

"Not absolutely, the probability is 90.00% nine point two." Borg'gong replied. "In addition to the hormones in his body just mentioned, his 'Herovek's body' - a unique part of the brain of the Atavoid - has also undergone major changes."

Keza's lips were drawn into a line.Then he stared at Harry. "Tell me, little one, is it really that bad?"

Harry's lips were dry, and he moistened them with his tongue. "I—I don't know. I don't even know how many hours I was in a daze. But I think..." He tried to explain. "I felt like there was a hole in my body that was sucking me in."

Keza looked irritable. "Because of him? The Terran?"

Harry flinched, he curled up.He didn't want to talk about Adam.Just thinking about Adam makes me sad.Talking about Adam might break him, or begging Keza to let him go back to Earth.He can't be so selfish.He would not be so selfish.He will not destroy the whole family with selfishness.It didn't make much sense anyway, because Keza was right: the Clan Council and the Intergalactic Affairs Administration wouldn't approve him for permanent residence on Earth, and he couldn't—wouldn't—play Adam's feelings for it.This is so selfish.Adam deserves better.Adam should have someone who can bring him happiness.A man who won't lie to him.

So why bother?

"Does it matter?" Harry's lips barely moved.

Keza narrowed his eyes.With just one look, Harry's fragile spirit shield collapsed, allowing Kesa to enter.Harry didn't refuse.Even if he wanted to refuse, he couldn't do it.

Maybe for a short moment, maybe after a few hours, finally, Keza left his mind.

Keza gritted his teeth, his expression slightly uncomfortable. "Your mind is out of order. Parts have become unresponsive to stimuli. The Borg'gon was right, your mind is dying, Harhet."

Harry looked at his brother blankly.

Sean hugged Harry tightly, his movements reassuring and protective. "You'll try to help him, won't you?" He looked at Keza.

Harry shook his head.What can Keza do?Although he is the Crown Prince of the Second Clan and the Chief Justice of the Kaluvia Branch of the Intergalactic Affairs Management Department, he is not so capable that he is not bound by the Parliament or the Management Department.Nobody has that much power.

Legal issues aside, if word of Adam's story got to the rest of the Kaluvians, the scandal alone would be enough to destroy their entire family.

"Don't worry about me," Harry said. "I will not bring our surnames to shame."

Keza closed his eyes and paused for a moment. "Hachter—"

"I see," Harry's lips were trembling, and he bit them hard.He still had a little fear of death after all, but he almost welcomed the possibility.He would rather die than the nameless indifference and emptiness.

"Can't we smuggle him to Earth?" Sean asked. "Like I did last time?"

"And then?" Keza's tone was cold. "The transmission record cannot be erased. Hachter will be found sooner or later, and the consequences will be much more serious. Even if he is not found, he will never be able to return to his home planet and reunite with his family. You just want him to live like that ? That will cut off all contact between him and his family, do you think that kind of life will make him happy? It’s not okay for a sensory person to lose sensory communication for a long time, and he will only have a tragic end.”

Shane raised her chin. "But at least he's sane and alive. We must act!"

Keza was unmoved. "We're not going to act," he said succinctly. "You, go home and don't spread a word.

"How can you be so ruthless?" Sean roared and stood up. "He's your brother!"

"That's right," Keza said. "He's my brother, it's our family business. You're just an outsider. Go away. You've been here too long, you're not welcome here."

Sean blushed from anger and humiliation.He rushed out.

"Why do you always treat him so badly?" Harry asked in a low voice.

Keza suppressed his expression. "That's irrelevant. We have more important things to discuss."

"What is it?" Harry looked down at his hands.What else is there to discuss?He's going to die, or turn into a vegetable.Harry almost wished he was dead; that was probably the better option.He doesn't want to be a burden to his family.

He'd never see Adam again anyway.He hadn't been able to say goodbye to him in person, and never would.Adam would never know that Harry had left this world.Besides, Adam probably didn't care.Adam would probably hate him.Of course Adam hated him.Adam may not remember him anymore.Adam may have fallen in love with someone.some earthling.some ordinary person.a certain—

"Hacht," Keza called to him. "Breathe! Harry!"

Krsana's commanding tone made him aware of the pain in his lungs.Harry opened his mouth and closed it again.He breathed.He worked hard.

Keza's expression softened a bit.He strode forward and came to Harry's side.Then he took Harry into his arms.

Harry clung to his brother and closed his eyes tightly.Keza hadn't held him in years.

Keza backed away.His expression was rather gloomy.He cupped Harry's face in his fingertips and looked into his eyes.

"I can't promise everything will go well, Harry," Keza said. "There will be many difficulties. But I promise you, I will solve it." Something cold and menacing flashed in his eyes. "play hard."