i think i still love you

If you lose you again, if you already have him in your heart, I will definitely not force you, but in fact, you still have me in your heart, don’t you?When you go to the casino, you are afraid that I will be beaten to death to hold down the [-] dollars. You cook soup for me. Since you still have feelings for me, why don't you give me another chance?Yifan?you love me right? "Gu Yifei looked up at Xiao Yifan, expecting Xiao Yifan's answer in his eyes.

"I..." In fact, Xiao Yifan never denied that he didn't love Gu Yifei from the beginning to the end. If he didn't love him, he wouldn't let himself get into this entanglement again. Xiao Yifan felt the callus on Gu Yifei's palm, In the past two years, he dreamed that these hands hugged him countless times, and nothing happened. He cheated in his arms, and he grabbed his wrist with one hand and kissed him forcefully.But every time he wakes up, there is always a cool and wet pillow next to his face. The more he thinks about it, the more the grievance and bitterness in his heart are stimulated. Xiao Yifan stopped the memory in his brain, adjusted his emotions and said, "Gu Yifei... Between individuals, it’s not just about being in love that can explain and let go. It’s like after a person’s face is disfigured, no matter how others say you are beautiful, you know it’s fake. Maybe the person who speaks is sincere, but the person who is disfigured It's not that he doesn't want to anesthetize himself, but he's afraid that it's just a sarcasm. It's not that I can't forgive you. In fact, I have forgiven you a long time ago, but... going back to the previous relationship... at least I can't do it now, It's not that I restrain myself subjectively, but that I can't let go of it in my heart, and I can't control this."

"Well, I understand, it's just...you don't have to accept me, but can you not run away, don't run away to a place where I can't find you, I will never disturb your life until you agree, you If you say you don’t want me to recognize the little stone, then I won’t recognize it. If you say stay away from you, then I will stay away from you, but if you say let me give up... I really can’t do it right now.” Because of the fever The low voice added some sadness to these few words.

Xiao Yifan felt extremely uncomfortable when he heard the phrase "If you don't let me recognize the little stone, then I won't recognize it". Is he a little too selfish, because his selfishness makes Xiaoshi less love.

"It's getting late, it's time for Xiao Shitou to go to bed, I'll go first, call me if it burns again at night." Before Gu Yifei could speak, Xiao Yifan pulled out his hand and walked out quickly, leaving Gu Yifei with a "boom" "The sound of closing the door.

……

……

Xiao Shitou put Xiao Yifan's waist between his legs, and put his chin on Xiao Yifan's shoulder. Under the dim street light, he was curious about the condensed air. He could feel that his father might not be in a good mood today. He didn't say a word when he came over. Such a father made him a little scared.

The small stones in the bathroom stopped playing with the water. After washing, he obediently took out the pronunciation chart on the bed to practice pronunciation. He felt that he read very well tonight, but his father didn't praise him, and he felt a little wronged.

"We have practiced here today, let's go to sleep." Xiao Yifan took the book from Xiao Shitou's hand and put him under the quilt.

After turning off the lights, the soft little dumpling got into his arms again "papa~"

"En" Xiao Yifan patted Xiaoshishi's head and responded.

"I love you." Xiao Shitou has learned this word for a long time, and today is the clearest time to say it.

Xiao Yifan felt uncomfortable. If he had to endure it at the beginning, Xiao Shitou wouldn't have to suffer so much with him. This shouldn't be the obedience he should have at his age, he should be naughty, he should be coquettish.

"Well, Dad loves little stones the most too." Xiao Yifan replied with a trembling voice.

"Baby, do you think Uncle Gu is okay?" Xiao Yifan asked tentatively.

"Well, good." Little Stone replied.

"What do you think is good about him?"

"He..." Xiao Shitou couldn't say a lot of words, and he chattered a lot, Xiao Yifan could probably guess what he meant, he said that because Uncle Gu was kind to his father, he was also kind to Xiao Shitou.

Xiao Yifan was silent.

On the fourth day, they left here, but this time they didn't leave without saying goodbye. Gu Yifei also gave Xiao Shitou a model airplane, and I don't know how he knew that Xiao Shitou likes airplanes.

"Take care of yourself." Gu Yifei said to Xiao Yifan with a smile.

"Well, you too." Xiao Yifan nodded.

"fufu~~" The little stone tugged down Gu Yifei's clothes.

Gu Yifei squatted down, tapped Xiao Shishi's nose and said, "You need to listen to your father, you know?"

Xiao Shitou nodded, and his wet mouth was printed on Gu Yifei's face.

Gu Yifei was stunned for a moment, then subconsciously looked up at Xiao Yifan.Xiao Yifan turned his head to the other side.Gu Yifei also gently kissed Xiao Shitou's face.

The stubble was a little itchy, and after Gu Yifei left his mouth, Xiao Shitou scratched his face with a smile, and his little finger stroked Gu Yifei's stubble again.

"Little Shitou wants to be a pilot when he grows up, doesn't he?" Gu Yifei asked.

"Well, big~handjob" the little stone drew a big circle in the air with his arms.

"Okay, then learn to speak well, and only after you learn how to speak well can you open the handjob." Gu Yifei pinched Xiao Shishi's slippery face.

"I'm fo~ao~ talkative," Xiaoshitou said proudly.

"We should leave Xiaoshitou." Xiao Yifan took Xiaoshitou's hand and said.

Gu Yifei smiled, hugged Xiao Shitou again and asked in a low voice, "Uncle, will he visit you at your new home in the future?"

Little Stone nodded heavily.

Xiao Yifan tugged at him again, Xiao Shitou blinked one eye at Gu Yifei, smiled and waved goodbye to Gu Yifei.

Gu Yifei smiled and waved, slowly stood up and watched Xiao Yifan lead the bouncing little stone to disappear gradually.

(41)

As soon as he moved to the clinic, he was busy cleaning up. Because Xiao Shitou had not found a place for him to take care of him when he first came here, Xiao Yifan could only take him with him. The adults were busy with Xiao Shitou's own play or watching cartoons.

The clinic is not big, but it is fairly well-equipped, and there are still a lot of places to clean up. Sometimes when I get busy, I can't take care of him except for having a meal with Xiao Shitou.

After finishing the work, Xiao Yifan found out that Xiaoshi didn't know when he started coughing. Xiao Yifan found out that it was already too late. The little guy had a fever of 40 degrees overnight. Xiao Yifan held Xiaoshi guiltily in the clinic for an injection .

The senior made a meal and brought it over, touched the hot little guy, and apologized to Xiao Yifan guiltily, "I'm sorry, Yifan."

"Senior brother, I can't blame you. He was born prematurely and has a weak foundation. He grew up sick." After Xiao Yifan said that, his heart was still so distressed that he was dying. The first patient who came in from the clinic he opened was own son.

In the next few days, the senior brother said that Xiao Yifan would not be allowed to work. Xiao Yifan saw that the clinic had just opened and there were no patients, so he did not refuse, and stayed at home with Xiao Shitou.

As the Chinese New Year was approaching, the brother had to go back to his hometown because he was newly married according to Chinese tradition, so he returned to China early, and Xiao Yifan stayed to take care of the clinic.

Although Xiaoshi's pneumonia didn't heal quickly, it was basically cured for the most part. Only the cough was not so good. There was almost no one in the clinic. Xiao Yifan played hide-and-seek with the little guy.

The door bell rang to remind people to come, Xiao Yifan patted the little stone hidden behind the curtain with two feet exposed, smiled and said to stay inside obediently, Dad went out to see a doctor.

Little Stone giggled.

Xiao Yifan walked out of the consultation room from the ward, and Gu Yifei was standing at the door.

"You... why are you here?" Xiao Yifan asked in surprise.

"Oh~ Tomorrow is New Year's Eve, let's come and see you." Gu Yifei said frankly.

There are relatively few Chinese here, and there is no atmosphere for celebrating the Spring Festival, Xiao Yifan almost forgot about it.

"Oh~ then...then..." Xiao Yifan didn't know what to say, so he said come in and sit?It's not suitable for a clinic here, so think about it and say, "The little stone is inside, go in."

Gu Yifei looked at him unexpectedly, Xiao Yifan opened the door and let him in.

Gu Yifei stopped at the door and did not go in, "Why have you lost weight again? It's only been two weeks."

"No, it's probably an illusion." Xiao Yifan was a little embarrassed, and his fingers were circling the thread that was pulled out of the fabric in his pocket.

"Are you planning to spend the Spring Festival here? There are no Chinese here, and there is no atmosphere. I am here to ask you something."

"What?" Xiao Yifan looked at Gu Yifei.

"Xiao Shitou once said that he wanted to go to Disneyland, so I booked a ticket to Orlando, can we take him there once." Gu Yifei felt a little guilty when he said it.

"No," Xiao Yifan categorically refused.

"Oh~" Gu Yifei didn't fight any more.

Gu Yifei entered the ward, Xiao Yifan leaned against the wall outside, and heard the laughter of the little stone inside after a while.

Xiao Yifan's emotions have been very depressed in recent years, and this emotion will affect Xiao Shitou to some extent, so Xiao Shitou has always been more sensible than other children of the same age. What's more, Xiao Yifan always felt that everything he did was for Xiao Shitou's benefit, which was exactly the case, ignoring too many Xiao Shitou's thoughts and preferences, and the rejection just now was a subconscious reaction, but he didn't expect Gu Yifei to accept it so simply The more Xiao Yifan thought about it, the more he felt that he was too hateful, and when did he become so arbitrary.

Xiao Yifan was meditating outside the door, when there was a "clang" sound inside the door, Xiao Yifan hurriedly pushed the door in, the two people in the room were stunned for a moment, Xiao Shitou reacted and hurriedly hid between Gu Yifei's legs.

"It's okay, it's okay." Gu Yifei squatted down to hold up the small stone with his arms, and with one hand he lifted up the bottle hanger that fell to the ground.

When Xiao Yifan walked over, Xiao Shitou cried on Gu Yifei's shoulder. Xiao Yifan hugged Xiao Shitou for unknown reasons.