gentle and affectionate

Chapter 44.

So bright, so dazzling.

When the thin light flashed, I didn't even have time to raise my heavy hands.I looked back instinctively, and saw the arrow feathers flying past his powerful arms, and the blood flowing from the torn sleeves, slowly and darkly, and it gripped my heart in an instant.

Because you know who the person standing in that position is, because you can know where he is just by breathing.

It was not until I confirmed with my own eyes that his life was not in danger that I finally breathed a sigh of relief, thinking that when I go back later, I must snatch his wine to punish him for his careless negligence on the battlefield.

Even so, a corner of my heart still thinks:

If I were faster, would I be able to cover him from getting hurt?

I looked in his direction, feeling a little scared, but the scene in front of me faded away at this moment, and faded away together with his arrogant smile.

no, don't go--

His eyes are the last bit of light in the gloomy city, even though dark red is the second invisible color after black.In the humid room, his scorching gaze made me unable to hide. I avoided his sight and stuck my nails into my palms, trying to heal the dull pain in my chest; but when the dark red color broke into me again When he was looking at him, all the psychological defenses he had prepared before collapsed in that instant.

I looked at his bloody arm, and then, I saw myself holding his arm and greedily sucking blood, and his face turned white due to the loss of blood.

There was a monster in a state of embarrassment kneeling on the ground, desperately sucking his life, but the tears shed were crystal clear.

—If this continues, I will kill him.

Pushing away his embrace with all the strength of his body, the scene in front of him was blurred again, the strong light made his eyes hurt, and when he came back to his senses, the darkness had turned into dazzling snow white, and there was a bright red different from his dark red eyes.

blood.

And in that white snow, my dead brothers.

Died.

When Wang was leaving, he was still smiling, just like when he took me away.

Take me away……

When the world was destroyed, when everything was lost, until even the temperature of my body was lost, the constant warmth from my arms became my last connection with this ruthless world.

Once trapped in the past, no matter how much I shouted, I could not get a response. I am a dust abandoned by the world. I have a different time from ordinary people. I have an extraordinary life and extraordinary talents, but I have no happiness. .

At that time, I met you.

I have searched for various reasons for death, just to get rid of the guilt of living as soon as possible, and to avoid it because of my own weakness.

And now, because of you, I want to live—

want to be your happiness

So

Take me away

take me away

……

Because I can't lose you.

At the moment of letting go, I was so sad that I couldn't even call out his name, and I realized later that the moment of letting go was never letting go——

It wasn't until the snow stopped, the wind stopped, when the morning light illuminated the clear sky, and the hope of my life was finally placed in front of me, that the man's tight grip on me was finally loosened, and then I followed him. fell down.

Until the end, I saw myself in those dark red eyes.

Only then did I understand that no matter the sky is blue or the wilderness is boundless, without him, even the sun is dark.

"So, you should wake up quickly."

I fell asleep without knowing it, and when I woke up, there was a warm yellow light in front of my eyes, and I didn't know when I was covered with a thin blanket.

It was night, and in the warm and elegant Japanese room in Japan, the lights danced like a little elf, illuminating the hand I held with the man.

I reached out to poke his face, but stopped at the moment of contact. His face, which was not fat at all, became thinner again. I curled my fingers and gently scratched his cheek, feeling Newborn stubble.

"What a mess."

But the man was still asleep, he didn't catch the prank me, and he didn't jump up and get angry like before.

I twitched the corners of my mouth. In the past, let alone such contact, even if I sat in front of him for a long time, I would have been noticed by the ninja's sharp nerves that are different from ordinary people, and there would have been a lot of noise.

But now, he is still sleeping so deeply that there is no sign of waking up.

The smile that reached the lips disappeared in an instant, as if even happiness wanted to fall asleep with the person in front of him.

That's right, such a luxurious thing was originally given by him.

Probably no one would have guessed that the brave ninja who crowned the world is actually the same person as the person in front of me.He lay there quietly, the dim light made it difficult for me to see his bloodless lips, and his breathing was abnormally quiet. On such a peaceful night, he seemed to be just a farmer resting at sunset, or he was exhausted after a day of patrolling. Just sleep the general.

farmer?I made up the picture of Heigang standing in the field with a hoe in my brain, and I felt that it was very unsuitable, but the latter one was more suitable for him, after all, it would be bad if he frightened the rice seedlings with such a ferocious face. .

However, no matter how vicious he was, it was better than falling asleep like this.

——It's been two days, but there is no sign of waking up.

"Mr. Heigang's injuries are quite serious. He lost a lot of blood in the two major injuries. Although the treatment is still timely, whether he can survive this test or not depends on his next situation."

"However, the princess and this gentleman don't need to worry too much. Mr. Heigang's physical foundation is good, and he has the magic protection of His Royal Highness, as long as there are signs of waking up, it will be fine."

Signs of waking up, what exactly is a sign of waking up?

He knew that Princess Zhishi had appointed the best imperial doctor, and knew that the doctor had tried his best, but he still couldn't help complaining in his heart, and even hated why he didn't know medical skills, and wouldn't use healing magic to save him like Princess Zhishi.I looked at the large and small wounds on his body, and thought that many of those wounds were caused by my own hands, so I didn't even have the face to say sorry to him.

What's more, there was an injury that could not be recovered. The thick gauze was wrapped across his broad chest, and it still showed a faint red color from time to time.

Looking at the shriveled sleeve under his left shoulder, he couldn't help but feel a sore nose.

"You guy, I told you to let go."

At that time, because of the second curse on me, the world will be closed.The magic is centered on me, the fact that I can't leave, no one knows better than me, even though I had hoped to leave with Heigan at the last moment, I knew in my heart that it was just my intention I just want to prolong that dream.

I wondered if I could die in the beautiful dream he gave me, would even death be beautiful.

At the end, I never imagined that such an invisible hope would be realized by him, at the cost of his left arm and the blue ice.

……

The dark night makes people feel blurred. I looked at him and suddenly couldn't tell whether it was a dream or reality.Even though I have been used to dreaming in the past few months, and the recurring scenes in my mind are almost numb, but this time, I still can't get rid of the deep fear.

I am afraid that he will leave me like this.

In recent days, I have frequently dreamed of Heigang, and I often see a man standing in front of me covered in blood in a trance. Even if I know it is a dream, I will inevitably wake up in a cold sweat in the end, and then I can't fall asleep again.

I don't know if the dream just now was a blessing or a curse.

"You slept soundly."

I complained, knowing that I was being unreasonable, and I couldn't stop the random thoughts in my mouth.His voice was too hoarse, and the content was probably all words that would definitely make him angry if he was heard, but he couldn't stop, as if trying to wake him up desperately.

If it can really wake up, let me say that it is not impossible to spend three days and three nights.

"A dignified ninja cut off his own hand like that, who would believe it?"

I tried to speak as lightly as possible, but suddenly it was hard.

"Tell me, if the people from the Asura Kingdom find out about this, they might come to you desperately. That's right, especially the green-haired lieutenant general. He failed to sneak attack you last time, but he has been holding on to it."

"If I knew you..."

"Obviously the strongest person... how can this arm be chopped off just like that..."

You know, even the destruction of the world is not as scary as you that day, so scared that I feel... that is really life is worse than death.

The blood that day was so much that it seemed to dye the whole world red, no matter how hard I pressed it, I couldn’t stop it; if I hadn’t made a deal with Miss Witch to come to Japan in advance, if Princess Tomoyo hadn’t arrived in time, I’m afraid Black Steel will really not be saved.

Although I was prepared, but with my mental state that day, it might be difficult to think of such a small event at that time-after I just experienced a big ups and downs from Thrace.Therefore, when Heigang, who had been holding me tightly, suddenly let go of his hand and fell down, I panicked immediately, and I didn't even pay attention to the royal troops who had been waiting there for a long time. I just knelt beside Heigang, panicked I don't know where to put my hands.

Thinking about that time, I was so panicked that I even forgot to use magic to stop the bleeding, even if it was frozen.

All I could think about was the unsolvable question of "what to do if the black steel is gone", crying so badly, I wanted to hug him, but I was afraid of touching his wound; when I recovered, I pressed desperately to stop the bleeding, But it had little effect. Seeing his body temperature cool down a little bit, he became even more flustered... It wasn't until a hand was lightly pressed on the top of my head, and the warmth of the world came, that I finally felt that I was still alive.

It turned out that he was not going to die.

But why am I so afraid?

"The arm holding me is so tight, don't you know that using so much force will tear the wound? Does it not hurt? Uh... you monster."

Halfway through the talk, I couldn't continue. I took a few deep breaths and inhaled my sore nose.

With such a serious injury, he lasted until he confirmed that I was safe and sound, and finally let go of the hands that tightly held my body. The moment I fell down, his eyes were full of peace of mind.

idiot, you yourself...

"Didn't you always say that you want me to cherish my life? Now that I have decided to live a good life, you have become like this..."

The doctor said that auspicious people have their own celestial features, and the possibility of Hei Gang surviving is nine out of ten. He said it is to let us not worry, but how can we really not worry?Not to mention nine out of ten, even if everything is safe, if he doesn't wake up for a day, I can't feel at ease for a day.

After all, if he is gone, where is the meaning of my life?

……

I don't know how long it has passed, probably because I have been chanting, and Heigang has been listening quietly, and I don't know if he heard it or not.I heard that his breathing was a little weaker than before, and he seemed a little short, so I stretched out my hand to touch his forehead, and the tentacles were abnormally hot.

The sound of footsteps outside the door saved my panic, and the soft knock on the door sounded like the sound of nature.

"Come in quickly."

It was Princess Tomoyo who opened the sliding door. I was surprised that she hadn't fallen asleep so late, so I hurriedly said:

"Princess Zhishi, he..."

"Do you have a fever?"

"Well……"

Looking at her knowing smile, the panic in my heart seemed to be less, and the hand that had become cold for a moment seemed to have returned some warmth.

With her here, Hei Gang should not die.

"sorry for disturbance."

My courtiers are still struggling on the line of life and death, but the smile on her lips has deepened, which makes me a little puzzled.She turned her head and signaled to the door, and then a middle-aged man in palace attire walked in. I recognized that it was the imperial doctor who treated Heigang yesterday, and I quickly stood up to welcome him in, only then realized that I was still holding Heigang Gang's hand, feeling a little embarrassed, quickly let go, and dodged to the side, but couldn't bear to retreat too far, and suddenly understood what Princess Zhishi was laughing at just now.

The imperial doctor didn't take it seriously, and sat down calmly to diagnose and treat Heigang. After a while, he signaled the maid at the door to go out, and gave some soft instructions.

"Back to the princess and sir, Mr. Heigang just has a little fever, which is caused by the previous wound infection." Seeing that my face changed, he quickly continued, "No, sir, don't worry, it's just a mild infection, and it won't affect my health." The wound is healing normally, besides, I have just checked the pulse. If there is no accident, Mr. Heigang will wake up within three days; as for the current fever, I have instructed my apprentice to decoct it in advance, and it will be delivered in a short time. After taking it, the fever will subside soon, in order to prevent the illness from recurring at night, I will be on standby in the next room, if there is any problem, the princess and sir will do as they please.”

Hearing the imperial doctor's guarantee, I breathed a sigh of relief, and the heart that had been hanging on me was finally put back in my belly. The middle-aged imperial doctor looked at me, and his kind smile became a little bit kinder unconsciously. point.

A while later, the imperial doctor's apprentice came back with a bowl of black medicinal soup, and he poured it down with a nimble young man.During the period, Zhishi asked me if I wanted to help, and I almost agreed in a daze. After realizing the problem, I hurriedly changed my words before the matter was irreversible, but the answer I got was still a smile of unknown meaning from the princess, which was even more embarrassing.

After feeding the medicine, the imperial doctor stood by the side for a while, checked the pulse again, and left, leaving me and Princess Zhishi. The princess, regardless of her status, pulled a cushion and sat beside the black steel bed. I sit down together.

"Finally, you can rest assured."

"Um……"

Like the embarrassment of being caught by the teacher for copying homework in elementary school, I rubbed my hands in embarrassment, not knowing how to answer.

Well, this is actually more like being caught in puppy love.

However, Teacher Zhishi was not embarrassed at all, he just stretched out his hand to touch Heigang's forehead, confirmed the temperature, and said to himself:

"It seems that it will take a while for his situation to improve. How about we wait together?" She smiled, "Don't be cautious. Although I am the monarch of Heigang in name, I treat him as a friend in private."

I have to say that Princess Zhishi's bright eyes are kind, she is considered a rare beauty, her gentle and appropriate smile makes her whole person appear generous and decent, which makes people feel good about her involuntarily, and her spirit relaxes, and I am no longer restrained, Sit down on the cushion beside her.

"I just hope the princess is not surprised."

"Speaking of which, although we are only meeting each other for the first time, we have known each other for a long time. In the final analysis, it is just because of this guy lying here, who should be introduced to us, but is lazy and fell asleep. It’s very similar when there are no missions.”

"Did you have a bad temper back then?"

"Well, I knew him from the beginning," Zhishi looked at him and said, "So, I didn't expect him to become what he was later."

Although he understood what she meant, he felt a little sad when he thought that he was the one who made him always put himself in danger after all, but Zhishi seemed not aware of it, and turned the topic to another direction on his own.

"But in fact, I think, if Hei Gang hadn't experienced those things, maybe he was like this in the first place."

……

An hour later, Princess Zhishi bid farewell and left.

The imperial doctor's medicine was very effective. After one dose of decoction, most of Heigang's fever had receded. After that, there was a slight relapse, but it was not a serious problem. After two hours, his breathing was no longer so short, and the flush on his face disappeared. .

It was light outside.

Everything went as expected by the imperial doctor, but what none of us thought was that Heigang had a nightmare at this moment.

Frowning tightly, his right hand trembled from time to time, as if trying to grab something, and beads of sweat dripped from his forehead.

I have never seen such fragile black steel.I helped him wipe off the sweat from his forehead, and reached out to hold his hand. There was no scar pierced by magic on the generous palm, and I murmured unconsciously.

"Black Steel..."

Even if I heard it from Yuko beforehand, and I have made various conjectures, the fact still has its own impact, let alone the current situation.

I looked at his habitually frowned brows, and stretched out my hand to smooth them out. The stretched brows made him look much more peaceful. I couldn't help but guess the black steel when he was young, and guess that he was safe in his mother's arms when he was young. The appearance of sleeping, is it the same as that of ordinary people's children?

No matter how talented he is, he is still just a child.

A child, in order to make his parents happy, tried his best to learn life since he was a child, but no matter how hard he tried, he still couldn't save anything.

The death of both his parents overnight pushed him into the abyss of despair.

The monsters are all killed, the rainstorm has stopped, and the sun shines on the earth as before, but where does he go now?

Why do you want to become stronger?When he was young, he once answered his father seriously. At that time, his father stroked his head and affirmed his answer.

——Protect the one you love.

But where did the person he loved go?

The man who was so powerful that he was almost invincible was actually only 24 years old.

"Mother……"

Today, ten years later, he seems to have returned to the past, hoarsely calling for his mother, raising his hand and groping indiscriminately, but no matter how he grasps, there is nothing but emptiness.

Ten years ago, no one could respond to him.

But now, I hugged his head lightly and clasped my fingers tightly with him.

In that case, the more you value love and righteousness, the easier it is to get lost; and at that time, besides blaming yourself for not being strong enough, how should you accept the facts in front of you?

Knowing that he was saved by his parents desperately at the last moment, did he then sit back and relax in Bailu City to accept the favor of the princess and enjoy this life in peace?

No, that would not be him.

I was still flustered before, and suddenly I didn’t panic anymore. Just like he used to comfort me in my nightmares, I gently pressed his head to my chest, and then called his name over and over again.

"Black Steel..."

After a while, his rapid breathing finally slowed down, and his right hand no longer trembled. Just as I was about to relax, I felt a sudden force from my clasped right hand, which made me feel a little painful.

I couldn't help being taken aback, and hurriedly backed away to check his expression, but before I had time to move far away, his hand that was holding me tightly loosened suddenly, and then his waist tightened, and the whole body Instead, he brought me into his arms with such force that it seemed as if he wanted to put me into his body.

"Hey... don't touch the wound..."

"Fay..."

My subconscious struggle stopped abruptly.

This is the first time I heard him call my name.

"Fay..."

The man held me firmly in his arms, and pressed his chin against my head. I couldn't see him, and he couldn't make a sentence, but I seemed to know what he was going to say.The window was suddenly illuminated by the morning light, and the sunlight penetrated through the paper window, smoothing his frown.

"Um,"

I gently hug him back,

"let's go."

The author has something to say:

I'm ashamed for dragging on for so long... The word count is still overwhelming, and the next paragraph can only be put in the next chapter