gentle and affectionate

Chapter 35.

Well, it's cloudy.

Deathly gray with no sunlight.Only in this way can I feel that the world in front of me is real.The whole sky was covered with gray and white, the color was a bit uneven, like a large piece of cloth that was dyed badly.

When there is no hope, the sky and the earth are equally dark.I twitched the corners of my mouth boredly, walked slowly on the gray street, breathed the stale air, and watched people scrambling for the coming rainstorm. That kind of daily life seemed to be a peaceful world.

——Hei Gang was injured.

It seems inappropriate to say this. It should be said that the two people who went out were injured, and Heigan was also included.I looked at my left hand, which was as white as paper. The blood on the fingertips belonging to that person had dried up, and there was still a strong smell of medicine on it, covering up the annoying smell of blood.

The contrast between blood and fingers is too sharp, and the intertwining of red and white makes me think of flesh and bones, just like the horror of being cut open to the bone marrow, but it seems different to me. pleasing to the eye.He came out in a hurry and didn't even change his clothes. The blood was not obvious on the black clothes, but there were still a few strange dark flowers blooming on the cuffs and chest.I laughed at myself, the strange joy seemed to make my pupils shrink uncontrollably, if someone found out, they would probably run away like a ghost.

Oh, in that case, it should be hell.

So at this time, we should be glad that we have come to such an indifferent city, people come and go in a hurry, everyone is busy for their own reasons, and they don’t know how trivial they are for endless desires Annoyance... However, the clothes are uniform black, and the face is also extremely uniform indifference.I looked at the drug and women's stalls on the street corners, and the corners of the mouth were bent. The women who were commodities were scantily clad, tirelessly attracting passing customers, like commodities sold at low prices.

Thank you for coming to such a world, because only in this way can I be reminded of the cruelty of the world.

It is precisely because it is such a world of indifference to each other, so even if they are walking on the road in blood-stained clothes like this, they will not attract anyone's attention. The bloody monster mingled in the dark crowd with a sneer on its face.Thick cloud cover made it hard to breathe, the air was damp and stale, and there was a faint smell of rotting food, even in the cabin we rented.

So I thought—just now, as soon as the two dogs at home came back, they added a bit of blood to the smell of rainwater in the house, and the bigger one probably still carried a gust of cold air, so , so that I am not even allowed to stay in the house.

Oh, forgot he had a name again.

His name is Black Steel.

I got up to open the door, and the first thing I saw was the blood-stained boy.

Since he is also called Little Wolf, we shall call him Little Wolf as well.The little wolf's body was almost soaked in blood, and it was hard to tell whether it was his or someone else's, but it seemed that his life was not in danger.The bright red of the blood was hidden in the black clothes, so it wasn't very eye-catching, and it didn't irritate the nerves too much. There was only a very familiar face that was weak and pale due to blood loss.

So I took a hand, and the tentacles were sticky, but I, who always love cleanliness, didn't dislike it.I almost habitually don't reject the smell of blood. This abnormal serenity makes me forget my identity as a monster, because even if my hands are covered with the boy's blood, I just feel warm as before.

Therefore, even if the scene of dealing with the wound is extremely silent, it will not make me focus on the blood, and it will not cause other abnormalities except the confusion of thoughts.So, I didn't retreat because of this embarrassment, I just pretended to be a medical staff here with a shy face, until the medicine and blood were all over my hands, and then I went to Sakura's room under the eyes of the other two , to say peace to the girl who was too distressed to speak.

I stood lost in thought on the street where people were coming and going, and the sky seemed to be getting darker again.Occasionally someone would cast strange glances at me, but those people would just look away and avoid me in a hurry, rather than meddling like some people.

It was embarrassing after all, at the time.

At that time, Heigang supported the young man with one hand, and waited patiently for him to slowly walk in, before holding the doorknob with his right hand, isolating us from the world behind him.The sound of closing the door was lowered on purpose, but the old door hinge still screamed harshly. Sakura, who was resting in the room, woke up because of this, and when she went out, she saw that familiar face, a familiar boy, covered in horrific blood. .

Since coming here, I haven't lived a peaceful life, so even Sakura has seen many... scenes, but after all, the boy named Xiaolang is different to her, so her pupils are still ruthless. Shrunk hard.

I think for a moment, she wanted to take care of him.

But unfortunately, she regained consciousness when she stretched out her hand. After all, the little wolf in front of her is not the little wolf she used to be.

Therefore, those hands can only be awkwardly frozen in mid-air, silent, full of concern in the heart, and the voice is hoarse like rain choked with sadness, and even a simple greeting cannot be said.

"Little Wolf..."

"……fine."

It's just that day-to-day conversations are hard to sustain.

I turned slightly sideways towards the boy, half-blocking Sakura behind me, trying to naturally block the intersection of their eyes.

"Let's go to the room."

Wounds always had to be dealt with, and there were always inconveniences in the living room.The young man bowed his head and remained silent, while I was locked by another gaze. Without looking, I knew that the owner of this gaze must be childish again.

I had to speak because he blocked the door of the room.

"What's the matter, 'Black Steel'?"

As for when he got here, I probably didn't pay attention.Hei Gang, who is nearly a head taller than me, has never lost in momentum, even if he was trying to be brave.

From the height of my eyes, I could just see his lips pursed into a line.From this point of view, his lips don't seem to be very thin, probably because he often licks them to give people such an illusion.I smiled to myself, saying that people with thin lips are mostly fickle. I thought so too, but I was completely wrong.

I smiled, and slowly raised my head to meet his gaze, with a childish expression on my face.

He has been staring at me very strictly recently, and now he doesn't even give me the chance to go out with the little wolf, as if he was afraid that my other eye would be gouged out, very childish.

It's the same now, he didn't say a word, just stared at me; I looked away, and found that the boy also lowered his head... The three of them faced each other like this, awkwardly silent.For a moment, I thought this scene was very interesting, and I silently laughed deeper, until I heard the expected answer from the boy, and I didn't look at the pair of lips that were wrongly judged to be ruthless.

"...Just here."

At that time, Xiao Lang was indifferent, as if he hadn't said anything; while Hei Gang lowered his head, unable to see his expression clearly.

Do not believe it.

I twitched the corner of my mouth. In fact, this kind of relationship really fits the scene in this city.When the walk on the strip was stopped by a guy, I smiled at the young pickpocket girl, who ran away in horror, probably worried that I would send her to the police station.

That's right.

They no longer trust each other like fools like they used to. Although there is no guarantee, it seems that everything can be entrusted to others with confidence, even their lives can be entrusted to each other, as if there has never been darkness in this world, especially It's that boy... I seem to be laughing too much recently, my heart beats abnormally, and my eyes are a little dizzy, so I stopped on the spot, leaning on the wall to adjust my breathing, and thinking that this little wolf is really much smarter than the previous one, He knew, for example, that being alone with me might be dangerous.

That's right, even humans themselves have never believed in each other, how could they believe in me, a monster that is already worthy of the name.

you ask then?

Then, how did I end up on this street?

Although he became a little more sensitive to the smell of blood after becoming like this, it was far from being out of control. Therefore, the bandaging process of being left in the living room was generally smooth except for a little embarrassment.The boy thanked him politely and went back to his room to rest. In the huge living room, only Heigan and I were left.He stood leaning against the wall with one hand in his pocket, his eyes lowered and he didn't know where to look.

I hooked the corners of my mouth and walked to him. When I got up, the dilapidated sofa creaked.I put my hand on his left arm and lead him to my room.

"'Black Steel' forbade me to enter, but I entered more smoothly than anyone else."

The reason why it is said is because he does not have any obvious resistance or dodge, except for the moment of hesitation at the moment of contact, my actions with him are as natural as couples who are deeply in love.I closed the door, pressed his shoulders with my backhand and let him sit on the bed, without expecting his answer, nor looking at his frowning expression.

"you……"

"'Hei Gang' don't get me wrong, although I covet your beauty, but I'm not that hungry yet." I casually put the medicine box aside, and then went to untie his coat by myself.

He stopped talking.

"Well, don't ask?" I said calmly, "I want to ask, if I don't care, 'Hei Gang' wants to cover this arm for a few days, I don't know if he can make a good wine."

If it wasn't for the muscles connecting it, the skin on the right arm would have been peeled off.

The injury that I wanted to hide was exposed by me, and he turned his face away unnaturally.The direction of the wound is almost along the arm, and I don’t know whether it’s because the black steel body technique is too good or the person who cut it is too bad... The wound is not deep but long, don’t worry too much about the muscles and bones, but there is a lot of bleeding, and the flesh is rolled up , and some stick together with the clothes.Seeing that it was inconvenient to take off the undershirt, I had to carefully cut off his sleeves. Just as I was about to take them off, the damp heat from the tentacles made my heart skip a beat for an instant.

blood.

Blood of Black Steel.

Blood gurgles out from the lifted flesh, the wound and the torn shirt are entangled together, the red, white and white are shocking, but somehow it has a great allure, so I can't take my eyes off for a moment.All the half of the sleeves that were dyed red dyed my own hands red, and the blood-soaked fabric seemed to be the most delicious dish in the world.

It took almost all of my strength to keep myself from stuffing it straight into my mouth.

My throat seemed to be strangled, my eyeballs swelled instantly, and I was so dizzy that it was even difficult to sit still... This is the first time I felt such a strong hunger after becoming a vampire. There seemed to be thousands of worms crawling in my stomach. I don't know when I slipped from the side of the bed to the floor, my whole body became hot like being bitten, I don't know if it was pain or itching, the pain made me want to abandon my reason, until my body was touched by a pair of cold hands.

……

The color of the sky turned dark yellow at some point.The low air pressure before the rainstorm made it more difficult to breathe. I maintained the posture I had just leaned against the wall, and coughed a few times, attracting the attention of a few young people in the corner next to me.They first glanced at me with a little bit of guard, probably because they realized that it was just me who looked the same age as them and was so thin, so they didn't take it seriously, and gave me a contemptuous look. Then go back and continue doing their thing.

I smiled to myself, did my appearance become more innocent and harmless?

In a grey-yellow city, on a stormy afternoon, people wearing the same masks would not pay attention to the small disturbance on the street corner, so when they confirmed that I was walking in their direction, the young people looked at me with disdain. Then I added some displeasure of being disturbed, and the staring eyes were obvious, clearly questioning whether a thin body like mine could withstand their fists and feet.

I deepened my smile.There were six or seven young and strong gangsters. The one who was knocked to the ground looked a little younger, probably under 20 years old. The dark green clothes were covered with shoe prints and mud accumulated in the corner of the wall.My appearance was obviously unexpected to him, otherwise his eyes would not be so frightened.

I think I may look really unreliable.

In fact, in this city, fights between young people like this are as common as eating and drinking. Think about it, when the little wolf came back covered in blood, no one said anything on the road, let alone this kind of fight. Not even a speck of blood.The scene of several young people beating a young man in a narrow alley, in the eyes of everyone, is just a commonplace in this city.

So I feel that I am really idle. This mentality is probably like seeing a cockroach means that there are countless cockroaches hidden in invisible places. Everyone understands this truth, but when they see it, they still hold back. I can't help but want to pinch the one in front of me to death.

So I think, now I probably just want to crush a cockroach to death.

The little stories on the street corner are as eye-catching as my blond hair, and the lessons learned so far are just trivial things in the eyes of people passing by.And when the young man who hastily pulled out the dagger was taken away by me due to poor defense, I knocked out the cold sharp weapon in his hand with a backhand, and then I remembered the guy who often used the scabbard to be lazy because he couldn't kill people.

You probably want to ask me what happened before I went out?It's nothing, and it's not a bad answer.

——It's very simple, how can I owe Hei Gang any more favors.

It's very simple, this answer is just like the conversation between me and him.I think all this is too ironic, because the person I should stay away from in this world has a deep-seated temptation to me, even a little bit is enough to make me lose my mind.

To be precise, it should be this person's blood.

It's true that I'm a monster, but admittedly, I haven't had the experience of drinking human blood, in other words, I haven't drunk the blood of Black Steel, so I probably can't be considered a real vampire.Otherwise, I won't forget the taste of that blood, and I won't forget my identity.

Otherwise, I would never be as careless as I am today.

The instinctive impulse made me almost stick my lips to his wound, frantically sucking the blood and life of that person... Losing sanity is a terrible thing that cannot be known without experience, almost devouring the body and soul .I thought I'd almost eaten him--if I hadn't gotten out in time; Who will tell me why this confusion reappeared, in this short afternoon, after I had escaped from that great temptation.

——The only thing similar to human hunger is overwhelming dizziness.I, who vaguely knew that I was fighting with someone, could no longer tell what caused this sudden crisis. I only knew that hunger and weakness were intertwined, and that the long-suppressed animal nature in my body was aroused in this violent situation , the figure in front of me swayed, and the smell of human beings filled the surroundings, but it didn't have the smell I longed for.

This has never happened before.Teeth and claws seem to have begun to grow rapidly. Unexpected accidents made me probably unable to save that boy again. I tried my best to suppress the urge to run away and knelt on the ground. When I stopped resisting, fists, feet and metal quickly surrounded me—— —

The coolness of the dagger piercing deep into the abdomen reminded me of my young self who was so careless when I was fighting on the Thracian border.

"Yo, wasn't it amazing just now? Why did it suddenly collapse?"

"Is she so beautiful a woman?"

"Hahaha, girls, don't come out and show off!"

……

The tinnitus was severe, and it was so painful that I couldn't hear what they were saying.The cold knife was pulled away from the body, and the warmth gushed out from the wound in an instant. I rushed forward uncontrollably, but was hit in the jaw by a punch, and lay on my back on the ground.

The siege seemed to pause for a moment, I couldn't hear what they said again, I just felt a tight ankle, and then my body was dragged some distance by rubbing against the ground... The sound of cloth being torn, the reappearing hands no longer into fists, and the coolness on my chest made me seem to understand what they were going to do next.

actually...

The body is directly exposed to the air so that the sense of security is extremely low, and the touch from strangers is even more disgusting to the extreme. The unclean and sticky feeling comes from it. The hard stone bricks behind it are damp and cold even in this sweltering early autumn. Gotta fight.Weakness seems to degrade the senses, the scene in front of him becomes dark and blurred, and the surrounding darkness makes this already chaotic dusk even more sinful.

Unfamiliar hands touched the cold body, and the filth caused nausea. --don't want.

--Do not touch me.

The memory seems to return to the long time ago in an instant, no one loves us, we live in our own world, but why don't you even give us such happiness...

Then, without him in that world, there is only me left.

……

Resisting has been the same as before for a hundred years, but there is still a strange feeling all over my body. I feel that my whole body is hot, and it seems that something is about to burst out of my body.Living in my own world, I couldn't see whether it was a human face or what, I only knew that my body was approached illegally.

- Not allowed.

—kill them.

In a trance, I felt a hot current rushing straight up from my feet, running through my whole body. The monstrous killing intent made my brain even hotter, and made my cold body sharper, making me suddenly burn like an eruption from a volcano. Burn out.

……

At that moment, everything was silent, only the wind and thunder were still noisy.

I lay disheveled in the lonely and deserted alley, my eyes were red and white.Less than one meter away, a terrifyingly viscous liquid sticks to the wall, slowly crawling downwards along with the gravity. Right below it is the fragment of a shattered sphere. However, it does not belong to any ball game , which was once a body.

Because now, it is already a corpse.

I was instantly chilled from head to toe.

"Monster-"

"Run—"

"Help me—"

Reason has obviously returned, but I still can't understand their words.I stared blankly at my hands, the nails grew by half a foot at some point, and the palm seemed to still have the touch of a young man's short hair.

I... killed him?

No, it's not true... right?

My heartbeat reached an unbelievable speed. I looked up and looked around in a panic, trying to find the answer to this question, but I was afraid of knowing the answer... I dared not look at the shocking corner anymore, and my sight without focal length urgently sought focus until I saw it out of the corner of my eye. Glimpsing the thin boy from the beginning, I somehow kindled hope in my heart.

He is still there.

The gangsters were probably scared away, and they didn't even care about their companion's corpse.Only the bullied boy was still sitting on the ground not far from me. I blinked my eyes and wanted to restore the focus of my sight. I thought he must know what happened, but he asked first:

"you……"

tell me it's not true, isn't it...

"do not come--!"

Scream and silence.

I finally saw his panic-stricken face clearly. With a scream, he pushed me away vigorously, and disappeared from my sight along with the sudden storm, and the sentence "Are you okay" was abruptly uttered. Blocked, choking sore throat.

A thunder rang, and the wind kicked up dust.

I sat on the ground and looked at the child's back.His body seemed to be pushed back a little, his right hand felt sticky, and beside his feet was the corpse that proved everything.I slowly raised my hand and brought it to my nose to smell it. It smelled disgusting of human blood.

I stared blankly at my terribly white hands, stained with blood and slurry, but also a bloody mess. It was morbidly similar to what I saw before going out today, but it didn't have the slightest temptation.

……

The wind passed through the thunder, and finally came the moment of heavy rain. The rain washed away the blood on my hands, but mixed everything into one ball... The rain was like pouring, and it washed away the irritability of Fu Shu, and gradually woke up me who had been in a trance.

The skinny boy had already run away, but he gave me the most perfect answer.

I stared at the corpse at my feet, watched the sticky things above it dilute and flow down, let the bloody rain soak my long clothes, and then watched the blood soak the broken head, and then I couldn't control it laughed out loud.

——what am I doing?

Are you brave?Are you still acting like a human being, or even pretending to be a so-called good person, to save others?

Obviously people have been numb for a long time, and even this city has become numb.Don't say it's just bullying, even if this person died here today, I'm afraid no one will pay too much attention to it. Let's just deal with the corpse to prevent it from affecting the appearance of the city, but a fool like me meddling in my own business, almost Unable to help themselves.

Only then did I realize how stupid I was, just like this lingering rainstorm.

But... the rain has already fallen, and I finally understand what kind of identity I should be. The crime of murder is not too much, and judging from the ending, it seems that everyone is happy.

Trembling with laughter, I knelt in the rain, not knowing who I was confessing to someone for a sin that could never be redeemed in my life; I kept staring until the rain was so heavy that I couldn't even see the corpse in front of me clearly, and finally put my hair out The numb head was buried in the arms, and the kneeling legs were put away, forgetting the time blurred by the darkness of the sky.The rain caused a slight pain on my body, and I wondered why it couldn't be heavier, so that I could be more awake.

All I remember is that it rained for an unusually long time.Because I don't remember how long I laughed, how many times I went outside, I don't know where I went, I just walked through many forked roads, but I still don't know where is my hometown.

It wasn't until later that I figured out, ah, what is homecoming, I was already homeless.

……

However, although there is no home, there is always a place to live.

When I went around and finally returned to the small courtyard we rented, it was late at night, and the night was quiet, but the rain had not stopped, so only the sound of rain filled the whole city.The stab wound on my abdomen healed sooner or later, but I still feel a little dizzy for some reason.At this time, they were probably all asleep, so I was spared from being seen in such a distressed state.

The rain is no longer as pouring as before, but it is still not light, and the sound is still very noisy, but on the contrary, the silence is more perfectly set off by the sound of the rain, which reminds me of the rain in Thrace. Occasionally, I would go out to do errands for Wang, but no matter how far I went, I would finish the task as soon as possible and then rush back non-stop, wanting to see Wang Anxin's smile, so I often encountered such nights.

On a cold night with wind and snow, because the king was waiting for me, I was able to come back despite the blizzard like that.

When I finally came back to my senses, I realized that today I was in a trance too much, but now I am alone, so I can temporarily let the memories float to the distant ages, and let myself be despicably happy for a while.

"I returned……"

I am back.

The moment I opened the courtyard door, I wanted to say this habitually, just like when I went back to Thrace Castle, but I didn't expect that there were still people awake, and I didn't expect that this sentence would be interrupted like this.

His subordinates suddenly lost strength, and the iron gate more than two meters high was pulled open vigorously from the inside, and a tall figure appeared in front of him. Looking at the big strides he took, he knew how urgent he was going to do. I was slow to react. One shot, almost bumped into him.

The moment he saw me, he stopped.

I look up at him.

He had the backlight so I couldn't see his face, but I knew he was staring at me.The atmosphere was so stalemate, and silence seemed too inappropriate for this occasion, so I couldn't help laughing.

"In the middle of the night, where is 'Hei Gang' going in such a hurry?"

He paused, as if he was blocked by my words, or maybe because he saw my smile.I felt that he looked me over from head to toe before finally speaking slowly:

"……Where have you been?"

The voice was unexpectedly hoarse.His voice was already low, and he was so hoarse that he could barely hear what he said, but I, who has been suffering from sensory disturbances lately, somehow managed to hear him clearly.So, listening to him say such straightforward questions like a child in such a voice, he laughed uncontrollably:

"Well, 'Black Steel' actually has a habit of inquiring about other people's privacy? It's really strange, and since it's thirsty, it drinks water. Look at 'Infinity City' where there is abundant rainfall, so there is no need to save on water bills at all."

I teased him, but he didn't seem to be amused, just stared at me, silent.

"I'm so old, can't I have a bit of night life?" I felt a little unconscious again, so I said casually, "Besides, why don't you go out without an umbrella, 'Black Steel' is always so disobedient, but it will spoil the children of."

"You..." There was finally anger in his voice, "Do you know, what if..."

The volume suddenly increased so much that even the children in the room could hear it. I waited for his anger to burst down, but he stopped suddenly, obviously so angry that he couldn't even breathe steadily.

"Huh? Why didn't you say it?"

"..."

His expression was completely hidden in the darkness, and he couldn't even tell the color of his eyes. All he gave me was silence, so I smiled with satisfaction.

"If there's nothing wrong, I'll go back first. After all, I don't have such good physical fitness as 'Black Steel'. If I get sick, it will be a headache."

As I said that, I walked up to him, and when I was about to pass by, I raised my hand and patted his shoulder. I felt his body under the drenched clothes tremble. It was obvious that he had been in the rain for a long time. Laugh more.

"After all, I don't want to be taken care of by you, 'Black Steel'."

He froze for a moment, I withdrew my hand and walked into the house after taking the picture, and suddenly thought of something within two steps, so I stopped on the spot, endured the dizziness from the attack, turned back slightly and said to him:

"Ah, by the way, it seems that soaking the wound in water is not good, 'Hei Gang' should also pay attention to health, because if you are sick, I am not willing to take care of you."

He maintained his standing facing the door, his back was not as good as before, and he remained silent without answering.

I walked away without looking back.

……

That day, Heigan stood in the pouring rain for a long time, which caused the wound that was not serious to fester, which caused a series of troubles later, which are all later.

Later, I heard from the wolf that he was so anxious that day that he looked for me alone in the rainstorm until midnight.

The author has something to say:

Yoho~!The legendary July is finally here~ Babies, do you miss me~

In fact, a certain sound was tested on the 1st, but unfortunately the computer is not strong enough, and it has been delayed after sending it for repair. It was not retrieved until the 7th. The process was quite tortuous, which seriously affected the update speed. Although I still have an external keyboard at hand. You can write as much as you want, but the beginning of 35 was already written on the computer at that time, and I couldn’t write a better one, so it was delayed for another week, but it finally came back, and I was also a fan and said excitedly~

Unlimited City and Thrace, like C’s mother drew, will of course be the two most cruel chapters. It is said that the content of the third volume is from Tokyo to Thrace, which just covers the most cruel part. As a result, Chapter 4 is A sharp rebound, the couple abused the dog, it was a retaliation

Sure enough, I still want to be a mother!

There should be one or two chapters a week during the summer vacation, the time is not very fixed, but usually on weekends, Wednesday may not be fixed, dear friends, don’t worry