Neighbors with powerful ministers

Of course, it was decided to restore the scene of the "crime" at Xie Jie's house, and Xie Qingtian was invited to solve the case.

Xie Qingtian suddenly felt that his head started to hurt again, his temples were swollen, his stomach still hurt a little, anyway, there was no comfortable place in his whole body.This is probably the sequelae of being in a coma for a long time after being smashed, Xie Jie thought.

Tianshi: [I have a built-in health function, which will detect your health in due course, and currently there is no abnormal display.Your previous sequelae have been cured 100%, do you need a mental test?I preliminarily deduce that you may be suffering from psychological Munchausen syndrome or hypochondriac based on your behavior of saying you are sick several times. 】

Xie Jie: [You shut up. 】

As soon as Tianshi spoke, Xie Jie's head hurt even more.

The two relatives from their hometown obviously came prepared this time. They were very considerate of Xie Jie, who was just recovering from a serious illness. , Accurately achieved the protection of one's own legitimate rights and interests on the basis of not being tired of Xie Jie.

Thanks to them being able to come up with such a trick, even the incriminating items were carefully packed in oiled paper bags.

Xie Jie was sitting on the chair, extremely lazy, as if he had no bones, just like a slow tortoise, he poked his head out and looked into the oil paper bag in the hands of his old uncle.

Nothing but chicken feathers.

Really chicken feathers.

The old man sprinkled chicken feathers on the bluestone board, where a circle was drawn with charcoal to represent his home, a thin oval shape represented the fence, and another circle next door represented the relationship with him. Gu Weng's family, a younger generation with disputes and conflicts.

Why use "junior" to refer to?Because the relationship between the two of them is too far away, saying great-grandson is a bit like taking advantage of each other maliciously.

Xie Jie looked at the final masterpiece completed on the bluestone slab, and fell into a strange meditation. He always felt that this pattern was a bit evil. Did he think too much?

The old uncle continued to take out another oil-paper bag from his arms, which contained a handful of black melon seeds.

Xie Jie finally had to speak out: "Don't tell me, he just ate a handful of melon seeds from your house."

The old uncle was immediately happy: "My eldest nephew is wise, he is the one who stole the food!"

This time the old uncle's official speech was very standard, Xie Jie understood.

Gu Weng quit, and his official language became as standard as possible, probably because he spoke more often: "Uncle, grandpa, I was wronged, why did I steal his melon seeds? It's not like my family doesn't have any seeds. Cold melon, sun melon seeds!"

Cold melon is watermelon, and cold melon is the old name long ago.Daqi is in a special stage of cultural change, and many things have different names, such as Jianyu and sedan chair, and cold melon and watermelon.In the early days, cold melon was only planted in a small area for the enjoyment of aristocratic families. It was not until recent years that it became popular across the country.As the land of Longxing, Jiangzuo was the first to introduce watermelon, but it also retains the name cold melon.

Many of the creativity and research spirit of the working people in our country have been reflected in the aspect of eating since ancient times. When seeing a new thing, the first thing to consider is, can this thing be eaten?Is it tasty?how to eat?

The best of these must be The Classic of Mountains and Seas, the way each thing is introduced, and the ending is always edible or inedible.

Everyone doesn't even spare the smallest piece of meat from the crab, let alone watermelon.No one needed to teach it, and the new entertainment of eating watermelon seeds after meals became popular in various villages almost simultaneously.

"Forget it, I was wrong," Xie Jie didn't want to get involved in this boring battle of melon seeds, but just felt a little like crying, and ran back and forth to the city twice just for a handful of melon seeds, who can I ask for reasoning? "The melon seeds disappeared for no reason, is that okay? It's okay, just a handful of melon seeds, I'll give you a bag!"

Xie Jie's solution is always so simple and rude, throwing money, throwing money to death.The whole body smells of local tyrants and copper.

But the old uncle refused the proposal with a stiff neck.Even if they have faced the loess and turned their backs to the sky for a lifetime, the nobleness in the Xie family's bones coincides with Xie He: "This is not a matter of a handful of melon seeds or two melon seeds, but a total of 33 things."

Xie Jie & Gu Weng: "...you can even count melon seeds?"

"I'm used to making one stack of thirty, can't I? One is gone, and the other one also shows signs of being passive. It's exactly 33, which is easy to count. I'm not stingy, I don't want to pay, I just I want him to apologize!"

"Why should I apologize? If you haven't done it, you haven't done it. Why do you frame me? Last time you pulled a leaf and a half of womb cabbage in my house, didn't you just let it go?"

Yes, the last conflict between them was the case of Gu Weng's womb cabbage leaf disappearing for no reason.

From the degree of their familiarity with Mandarin, it can be judged that the two of them must have talked a lot during this conversation, and they were arguing back and forth, and practice makes perfect.

Xie Jie turned his head to the right, and silently glanced at his grand-nephew: "...you just had the nerve to say that he cares about every detail." A person who counts the number of cabbage leaves in his own family is not qualified to laugh at other people's counting melon seeds!

"As I said last time, I didn't drag your cabbage!" The old man was still arguing.

"It's not you, it's a ghost?" Gu Weng stepped forward, his anger escalating.

Then the two yelled at each other again.

Just now everyone was under fire, trying to speak official Chinese, but now they can't help but return to their hometown dialect again. This is the main battlefield of their language. Even if they don't understand, they can still feel the proficiency and bloody wind.

Xie Jie once again fell into the state of not understanding.But based on what he said before, he almost understood it.

Gu Weng's family lost the cabbage leaves for no reason, and suspected that the neighbor's old uncle dragged them away. The old uncle refused to admit it, and the two began to quarrel, even to the point where they came to Jiangzuo to find Xie He's tablet to judge, that is, Zhongyuan Festival that time.The father said that the father was right and the woman said that the mother was right, but the two still couldn't argue with each other, so they had to go home with a truce.Who would have thought that within a few days, the watermelon seeds in my uncle's house would be gone.The old uncle suspected that Gu Weng was maliciously retaliating. Gu Weng felt that the old uncle was making trouble for no reason, so the two went to Jiangzuo again.

Xie Jie: "..." I will pay you twice, no, ten times, okay?

The two still had a lot of backbone, and they shouted back in Mandarin in unison: "No! It's not about money!"

——Ten years of neighbors, and finally turned against each other because of a vegetable leaf and a handful of melon seeds, the diversity of human species is so interesting.

"So, why don't you suspect that there is a third party to take over the two?" Xie Jie felt that even without this third party, he could still create one for them.

"My cabbage is placed on the high platform," Gu Weng said, gesturing, and added some details to the masterpiece with a charcoal pen. "There are dirt roads under this high platform. Ordinary people will definitely leave footprints, but if you come from the next door Reach out, and you won't stay."

Xie Jie: "... Could it be an animal?"

Daqi is a dynasty with an extremely rich spiritual entertainment culture, eating, drinking and having fun is not bad, the rich have money to play, and the poor have money to play, one of which is that everyone from house to house likes to keep pets. People use it for fun, and people without money use it to watch the nursing home, and everyone can enjoy it.For example, Xie Jie's uncle Shenzong is an eighth-level amateur who raises pigeons in captivity.

"Which animal eats melon seeds and leaves melon seed skins and a field of chicken feathers?" At this moment, the old uncle was as if Di Renjie and Bao Zheng were on their bodies at the same time, discerning every detail, as if they were not fighting alone.

"My second master." Xie Jie gave the answer without thinking.

Yes, Xie Jie, as the stubborn owner of Yongji, naturally raised animals, imported them from overseas, and came from the Maritime Silk Road on a big ship with wind and waves, not to mention how foreign it is.

Xie Jie doted on it very much, so he was nicknamed Erye.Clever and domineering, picky eaters, 100% follow "father".

It's a pity that when Xie Jie came to Jiangzuo, he came back with his cousin, so it was considered a business trip.At that time, the Eldest Princess still harbored the dream that her son would become sensible when he grows up, and that he would work hard to make himself as good as his father, so she resolutely refused to let him bring the second master along: "Look at which official will accompany you to drive? Bringing living things? They don't even dare to bring concubines, what kind of thing are you bringing?!"

Xie Jie had no choice but to give up.As a result, he stayed in Jiangzuo directly and did not return to Beijing.The eldest princess didn't say anything, but she still missed her son very much, so she took the second master as a hostage.

Second Master: ...

The old uncle waved his hands and said again and again: "That is a precious thing in your capital. Where did such a beast come from in our countryside? It would be good to have some to eat. It is impossible to leave anything behind after plucking the geese. You know Cutting? People are so hungry that they even eat tree bark, let alone animals."

Xie Jie: "So what do you think?"

"He has to apologize today!" The two said in unison again, and then glared angrily.

Xie Jie's whole body is going to be bad.

……

After returning home from Xie Mansion, Fang Chaoci next door has been sitting in the study, doing nothing, just staring at the Jiangxi kumquats on the mahogany desk the whole time, neither eating nor letting others touch them, just Look, look, you seem to be able to see a flower.

A white raccoon slave leaped lightly, sat down with its front legs together, raised its proud head, and looked down at Fang Chaoci from the desk.

Only when he is alone at home, Fang Chaoci will remove the expression disguise, and start to look at Li Nu with an expressionless face. There is no emotion in the black and white eyes, and the temperament of the whole person finally has the indifference that Xie Jie thinks he should have. and don't care.

The raccoon slave tentatively stretched out its plum blossom claws towards the orange.

Fang Chaoci snatched the kumquats in one go, held them in his hands, and said two words loudly: "Mine!"

The author has something to say: Little Theater:

Fang Gong: This is the first gift that Dolphin gave me!mine!It's all mine!

Xie Shou: ... No, I didn't!

Raccoon slave*: It refers to cats, the famous poem by Lu You, the cat slave——I don’t go out with the raccoon slave, everyone must know 23333 But in the Song Dynasty, bird breeding was popular among the upper class.Cats have not been able to enter the high-level circle on a large scale. The main role of cats is hunting dogs, not pets.

Cabbage *: the ancient name of Chinese cabbage.