all the way

Almost all the beautiful autumn is lost in a cold wind, this year's cold wind also brought a heavy snow, Liu Xia spent his 21st birthday in the heavy snow.

Many years later, when Liu Xia recalled the past, he felt that for him, the age of 21 seemed to be a watershed. He began to truly enter the adult world, because he participated in the short period of time after his 21st birthday. So many things about colleagues, friends, and relatives.

In the unit, he gave three gifts in a week. Du Tao and Wang Jianjun got married, and secretary Yang Hong's mother's [-]th birthday. Everyone in the unit gave gifts, and Liu Xia also gave ten yuan.

Here at home, on the first day of the twelfth lunar month, Sun Yufang gave birth to a son safely in Wangning Health Center. Liu Changqing named him Liuxuan, which means day lilies forgetting worries.

Liu Changqing hoped that the birth of this child would enable Liu Changchun's family to completely recover from the misfortune of losing their two mistresses and regain their vitality.

In order to express their congratulations, Liu Xia and his brothers all independently gave Liu Yu a congratulatory gift. What Liu Xia gave was a dual-purpose stroller, which can be folded up and used as a cart, and opened up to be used as a cot.

On the sixth day of the twelfth lunar month, Liu Miao and Wen Yongfang got married. In addition to Liu Changqing and Sun Chang'e representing half of her natal family, they prepared two sets of bedding, dressing table, writing desk, and crate for Wen Yongfang as dowry. Liu Xia and Liu Chuan also bought a car for Wen Yongfang. Forever women's bicycles.

Although it is not possible to ride a bicycle from Wangning to Liujialing, it is possible to ride from Mazhai to Wangning.

Liu Ling sent Wen Yongfang a seagull brand women's watch from Kyoto.

On the fifteenth day of the twelfth lunar month, Liu Xia sent Zhang Fusheng 30 yuan to congratulate Zhang Qiaoqiao on his birth.

After receiving the watch and the short letter from Liu Ling, Liu Xia finally couldn't restrain the growing uneasiness in his heart recently, and decided to write a letter to Chen Zhenbei, asking about the current situation of the fifth brother, please Chen Zhenbei It's convenient, take care of Liu Ling.

Liu Xia felt that Liu Ling seemed to be in some trouble, and he couldn't solve it himself, but he couldn't ask his family for help. This incident should have a great impact on Liu Ling, otherwise he wouldn't be able to stay for half a year. For a long time, when writing letters to Liu Xia, he didn't dare to talk about his current situation.

A week later, Liu Xia received a reply letter from Chen Zhenbei.

Hello Yaoer:

Say hello to the cat!

It was a surprise and a pleasure to receive your letter. A few months before that, I thought that maybe my family and I would never have any chance to meet again in this life.

When I received your letter, I read it several times. I could see your concern for your fifth brother. I hesitated for a whole day whether to reply to your letter. I didn’t know how to tell you about your fifth brother’s current situation. We've been very busy recently and rarely see each other.

However, I know that your fifth brother has indeed encountered some troubles that may not be resolved. I can't tell you or anyone else what it is until your fifth brother is willing to tell you.

So I'm sorry Yao'er, all I can tell you is that your fifth brother is working normally and his body is normal, but I can't tell you that he is living a good and happy life, although that is what I hope most, but I know, He is not happy.

But you don't have to worry, from Xiaoling's point of view, as long as he is determined to put this matter aside, he can quickly return to his previous full and happy life without any harm.

As for the matter you entrusted me to take care of him, I'm sorry Yao'er, I can only say sorry to you again.

I'm thinking about retiring from the army, so in the future, I mean, I may never have the opportunity to work with your fifth brother for the entire life after I leave the army, so I will never have the opportunity to take care of your fifth brother again, no matter what happens to him in the future to what.

When I think about it, it hurts my heart, but this is the life I chose voluntarily, I think I should be able to bear it, the rules of this world are like this, even if I am as selfish as I am, I can’t (there are two lines of words that have been smeared so that I can’t see clearly )...

I'm sorry Yao'er, I was a little confused, I thought of something else just now, my nonsense has nothing to do with what I wanted to say to you, I'm very busy, so I won't copy it again.

Although your fifth brother is not happy for the time being, and I may have to leave the army, but I can tell you responsibly, Yao’er, you, and everyone in your family who loves and cares about your fifth brother, don’t have to worry about his future.

I used to be your fifth brother's best brother and comrade-in-arms. At the initial stage of his enlistment, I was able to provide him with a little help because of my family relationship. Did it give you an illusion that your fifth brother Everything he got now is because of my help, and his future life also needs the protection of people like me to live better?

Yaoer, you should know that poem, right?

Yu Yujian bottom pine, seedlings from the mountain.

With the diameter of the stem, it shades the bar of a hundred feet.

The world is high, and the handsome Shen is subordinate.

The terrain makes it so, the origin is not one time.

……

Yaoer, do you understand what I mean?

Your fifth brother, or everyone in your family including you, is a pine at the bottom of the stream. No pine tree needs the shelter of a grass, even if this grass grows on the top of a high mountain.

Perhaps when the pine tree was a neglected pine nut, a barley tree with thorns could provide him with temporary protection from the fate of being trampled and eaten by mountain rodents.

But once he breaks through the ground and reveals the essence of a pine tree, wind, rain, fog and mist can't stop him from growing into a tree that stands tall, so why does he need the shelter and protection of a grass on the top of the mountain?

Regardless of the future of Xiao Ling and me, in the past, in my heart, we have always stood side by side as comrades-in-arms and friends. I have never been his protector, and Xiao Ling has never needed anyone's protection. His birth may put him at the bottom of the stream forever, but a pine is a pine, and it is a pine growing at the bottom of the stream, just like grass is always grass, whether it is enshrined in an expensive flowerpot or grown on the top of a mountain, it is still grass. .

The grass on the top of the mountain can get more sunshine and rain, so it can be complacent and look down on all living beings. The feeling of being looked up to by all living beings is intoxicating, nostalgic, and irresistible. In the end, I once thought that I had become a tree.

But after I met your fifth brother, after I went to Liujialing, I knew what a real tree looks like, and I began to reflect on myself, and began to long for another life, longing to be like Xiao Ling, Even if the price is always growing in the bottom of the stream.

……

The relationship between you and your fifth brother has never been a relationship of shelter and dependence. We used to have mutual encouragement and support. Only I know the help your fifth brother has given me. What he gave me is far more than what I can give him. of.

I don't know what my future will be like, but I can assure you that I will do my best, whatever Xiao Ling needs, I will do everything I can, in this life, I will never die...

Mao'er wrinkled her little nose and asked Liu Xia, "Uncle Wu's letter to us is too short, what does it have to do with Uncle Zhenbei wanting to retire from the army?"

Liu Xia shook his head: "I also feel very confused. Brother Zhenbei retired from the army. Why is it like saying goodbye to your fifth uncle forever? He may never have the chance to interact with our family again. Their family is from Kyoto. Your fifth uncle and the others The army is so close to the capital, and he and Uncle Zeng know each other again, and they often come and go, how could he never have the chance to meet with our family?

Unless it's because he doesn't want to have anything to do with us anymore, but his tone doesn't sound like that at all. He seems to be worried about your fifth uncle so much. "

Liu Xia read the paragraph at the end of the letter again: Yao'er, since your fifth brother is unwilling, then don't go after what happened to your fifth brother now. What I hope you do is to let your fifth brother know , no matter what happened to him, you will always be his closest, most trustworthy and reliable family members, I know, you must be.

Liu Xia confirmed again that Chen Zhenbei was worried about Liu Ling, but he couldn't give Liu Ling any help now.

Liu Xia muttered and said: "They are all men, why are you so convoluted, you are so close to Fifth Brother, just go and tell Fifth Brother that he not only has our family members, but also a hard-core comrade-in-arms and brother like you." better?"

Mao'er took the letter over and read it again: "Uncle Zhenbei didn't tell Uncle Wu directly, because Uncle Wu and Uncle Zhenbei are teasing Baoer, right?"

Liu Xia asked, "Why do you say that?"

Mao'er pointed to the last few lines: "Look at the paragraph added by Uncle Zhenbei, 'Don't let your fifth brother know about the letter you wrote to me, before he is willing to take the initiative to talk to you, anyone's intervention is harmful to him. It's all pressure, and I don't want a little bit of pressure to be added to him'.

Uncle Zhenbei must have angered Uncle Wu for some reason. Uncle Wu no longer cares about Uncle Zhenbei, and he doesn't want others to know about it, not even our family members.

Uncle Zhenbei is afraid that Uncle Wu will take it as his own initiative to write a letter if he finds out about his correspondence with you, and wants you to help persuade Uncle Wu to spare him and reconcile with him, so he must tell you clearly what happened, Right?Uncle Wu didn't want you to know what happened, so wouldn't Uncle Wu be even angrier? "

Liu Xia took the letter over and glanced at it: "It seems that Brother Zhenbei may be really confused, the letters he wrote are all in a mess, and he can't figure out what he wants to say.

Well, as long as you know that your fifth uncle is fine, everything else is nothing.

However, fifth brother and brother Zhenbei have such a good relationship, what happened to make them so awkward, your fifth uncle hasn't mentioned brother Zhenbei in more than half a year's letters. "

Mao'er said: "Anyway, Uncle Wu is coming back soon, you can ask him when he comes back."

Liu Ling returned to Rongze on the [-]th day of the twelfth lunar month. It was a great cold season, and the weather was suitable for the occasion. The cold northwest was blowing, and there were dense small snow particles falling. It was really freezing.

Liu Ling's previous letter didn't say when he would come back, so Liu Chuan couldn't pick him up either. He pushed open the very strange white fence gate in Liu Xia's small courtyard, and stood on Liu Xia's shoulders with snow on his shoulders. in front of.

Liu Xia threw himself on Liu Ling, yelled and dragged him into the house together with him.

Mao'er has already gone to school after lunch. He finished the last two exams in the afternoon and can wait for the notice at home tomorrow.

There are still a lot of meat dumplings for lunch, Liu Xia cooked a big bowl of noodles for Liu Ling, sat across the table and watched Liu Ling eat intently.

He felt that the fifth brother seemed to be a little thinner, and looked into his eyes with a smile. Besides the joy from the heart, there seemed to be something else, oh, it seemed that the fifth brother was hugging him and laughing just now , not as wanton and indulgent as before.

Is it the illusion caused by his preconception that Liu Ling is still stuck in something unsolvable?

Liu Xia is not a complicated person, especially in front of his closest family members, he never thought of hiding his emotions, so after Liu Ling had dinner, the two of them sat in front of the big electric stove in the master bedroom and talked over sweet potatoes At that time, he asked Liu Ling very directly: "Fifth brother, have you not resolved that unhappy thing in the army?"

"What?" Liu Ling looked at him inexplicably.

Liu Xia said: "Except for the letter you wrote back to me when the cat was fighting with a man, every letter you wrote was only a sparse page, and the longer ones were all talking to me, talking... just nothing. Find something to say. Every time you wrote a letter, you would tell me about the interesting things that happened around you. You wrote several letters, but now there is nothing in your letter.

And brother Zhenbei, you haven't mentioned him for so long, and he hasn't written me anything in your letters.

Fifth Brother, is it related to Brother Zhenbei that you have been unhappy for so long?Are you and Brother Zhenbei having a quarrel?Was he too harsh on your company during that exercise? "

Liu Ling stared at Liu Xia in a daze for a long time, then forced a smile and shook her head: "No, what are you thinking about when you have nothing to do? I don't have anything to worry about, I... cough, Chen Zhenbei and I are very busy, he Maybe I will go to the regiment headquarters soon, and the higher the position is, the more things will definitely happen, how could it be possible to have nothing to do with you all the time?"

Liu Xia was stunned for a while, swallowed some words that almost blurted out, and then said: "But you are good friends, hasn't he gone to the regiment headquarters yet? He has been the battalion commander for two or three years, and he has always liked him." He's messing around with you, almost every time you write a letter, he has to get in the way, how busy you are now, so you don't see each other for half a year."

Liu Ling lowered her eyes, and turned the baked sweet potato sticking on the chopsticks in her hand: "Whether I haven't seen each other for more than half a year, we often see each other for training, meetings, but due to job changes or transfers or other reasons, many old friends will not know each other. Is it slowly fading? Isn’t it the same with you and many classmates?”

Liu Xia thought of Zhang Changxi who was transferred back to Wangning Vocational High that Chu Fenghe just mentioned a few days ago, and Liu Gousheng, who often fights after marriage, was a little sad, but he soon realized that he was thinking in the wrong direction. :

"But it's too sudden for you guys. You were best friends and comrades-in-arms. Brother Zhenbei didn't really transfer away. You are still in the original unit. I don't think it should be... Fifth brother, right? Brother Zhenbei is acting like a high-ranking son in front of you, you feel uncomfortable, so you tried to alienate him?"

Liu Ling slowly peeled off the roasted sweet potato skin and ate it: "It's a little bit, we are different from people of their background, it can't be called a joke, because he didn't do it on purpose, that should be his original appearance!

Yaoer, people are actually like this, at a certain time, due to some special reasons, people who are completely different from the world will be in the same time and space. At that moment, it seems that there is no difference between them at all, but that special Once time and reason are gone, they will return to their original worlds and live completely different lives again.

For example, at Brother Huaichen’s wedding, we ate at the same magnificent hotel with many of his colleagues and friends. At that time, we were all similar in the eyes of outsiders, but when the wedding was over, some of his friends’ children returned to Kyoto. Mao'er and Xiaorui returned to Liujialing.

So Yaoer, in the eyes of outsiders, two people walking side by side are not necessarily friends and partners, maybe they are just passers-by or people who met by chance for a short time because of a coincidence, and the next moment they go their separate ways. "

Liu Xia said dully: "I know what you said applies to most people, but I don't think that's the case with you and Brother Zhenbei.

I never thought that being friends with Brother Zhenbei would bring me or our family any benefits. I just feel uncomfortable. Brother Zhenbei is the person I know who understands you best. I hope you have someone like this by your side. Friends, you don’t need protection, but you always need someone who can listen to what you have to say. You are so far away from us. If you don’t even have a friend who understands and understands you, it’s not too..., it’s just not beautiful anyway. . "

Liu Ling smiled and said: "Fifth brother is not that pitiful. I have many friends. The two comrades who were admitted to the military academy with me, we have been keeping in touch with each other, and we have met several times on Sundays. My current instructor and... ..."

Liu Xia interrupted Liu Ling: "Do they know you as well as Brother Zhenbei? Do they treat you the same as Brother Zhenbei treats you?"

Liu Ling was silent for a long time before saying: "It's different, but if it's different from him, it's not good."

Now it was Liu Xia's turn to be silent, he didn't know how to answer Liu Ling's words.

It was just a very short silence, Liu Ling and Liu Xia would not let other factors affect the joy of their brothers reunion.

Liu Ling stuffed a small piece of very thin sweet potato into Liu Xia's mouth: "Don't talk about others, tell Fifth Brother, why did you hide such a big thing about buying a house from me, and how much did you borrow to buy the house? "

Liu Xia smiled very proudly: "It's already been paid off, except for the fourth brother who still has 500 yuan. He refused to take it anyway. Now I'm starting to save money again."

Liu Ling rubbed Liu Xia's head, this time she smiled with pride and heartache from the bottom of her heart: "I know you are the most capable, but your work is really hard, if you encounter difficulties in the future, don't worry about it." Carrying it alone, you still have our older brothers, I can earn money without you, but the salary of the army is relatively high, there is nothing to spend money on, and the fifth brother can help you a little."

Liu Xia said, "You've already helped me. Didn't you return the 600 yuan for the camera to Brother Zhenbei for me? Besides, I don't intend to return it to you."

The indescribable expression in Liu Ling's eyes disappeared in a flash, and he still smiled and said: "If you dare to say yes, I won't beat you up. How about it? How many photos have you taken of the cat? Have you washed them? Let me see."

Liu Xia took out two large photo albums from the drawer: "Here, there are a lot of them in the middle of this one, I haven't had time to buy another photo album!"

Liu Xia saw Liu Ling slowly flipping through various photos of Mao Er and him in the album, and said, "Fifth brother, how many times did you pay back the money to Brother Zhenbei? 600 yuan, it took several of you." monthly salary?"

Liu Ling looked at the photo intently and replied: "That's right, three or four months, but he is a rich man, don't worry, I will give it to him once I save enough.

Yaoer, we will go home in a few days, so don't take the initiative to mention Chen Zhenbei, okay?If my uncle and my mother bring it up, you can help me get around it, okay? "

Liu Xia leaned on Liu Ling's shoulder, and nodded lightly: "I see, Fifth Brother, don't worry, it's nothing serious, there is no difficulty in this world, although I don't know who you and Brother Chen are. What's going on, but no matter what, I'm on your side.

Of course it’s good to have a good friend like him, if not, you still have so many older brothers and younger brothers like us, it’s nothing special. "

Liu Ling patted Liu Xia's head backhand, with a slight smile on his face, and continued to flip through the photo album slowly.