[Comprehensive] Mr. Dazai who can't die

Careless.

Osamu Dazai, who was floating on the river like a floating corpse, looked at the strange sky blankly. He only needed to take a cursory glance at the rows of low houses on the river bank. With his eyes closed, he knew that he had changed another world. .

"Ah, if I knew it earlier, I would have asked Zhongye to go back to see Mi Jiang and eat the red bean rice before leaving. I was careless." The frantic tone really regretted the beginning.

After wandering for a while, Osamu Dazai, feeling bored, climbed ashore from the rushing river alone, wrung out the drenched windbreaker with his hands, and helped the Taidao hanging on his waist, "Nami-chan, the red bean rice is soaked again Already."

"Please cheer up Dazai-sama, there's nothing you can do about it, the final decisive battle is too exaggerated." Even the envoy of the non-censorship was attracted by this war, "Because the fluctuations are too great, the government of the time Emergency measures had to be taken."

As the only sword that the general can summon, Candlestick Kiri Mitsutada also paid a heavy price in the confrontation with the Jianfei envoy, which succeeded in delaying enough time for the government to open the space-time tunnel, but because of the heavy casualties, I can't show up in a short time, and can only be warmed in the body knife.

"Think about it, the government of the time has already said that the danger in this world is quite low, so you can just treat it as a vacation."

"No way, Mi-chan, I'm dying because I don't have enough strength~" In order to enhance the credibility of his words, Osamu Dazai threw himself directly on the straw stacks in the farmland by the roadside.

What is the difference between him and a salted fish in the days without addiction?

Just when Candlestick Kiri Mitsutada was secretly anxious in the body, thinking about what comforting words to say, Osamu Dazai seemed to have discovered something, got up from the haystack with a bang, and walked straight to a certain place.

"I've been searching for the meaning of my life so far." He didn't even care about the grass clippings stuck upside down on his head and strode forward to hold the cool hand of the brown-haired girl who suddenly appeared in the wilderness for some reason, "To this day, I may understand that all these hardships and trials are for the purpose of meeting you—"

"Master Dazai, you..."

"Oh, Mi-chan, I think your injury is too serious and you should recuperate from illness." Forcefully stuffing a ball of spiritual power into the body of Taidao beside him, he was caught off guard and stuffed into the candlestick behind a ball of tonic All, even though I didn't intend it, but was passively supported by pure spiritual power, my consciousness gradually lost, and I fell into a deep sleep.

After finishing the old lady, Mr. Dazai continued to praise without incident, "You girl who blooms on the ridge of the field as dazzling as lisianthus flowers, you have stars and seas in your ruby ​​eyes." Osamu Dazai agreed In the past, in the girl's round ear, he lowered his voice and said affectionately to the girl, "Are you willing to die for love with me on such a beautiful sunny day?"

"Of course if you refuse, I hope..."

"Okay."

"What... what?"

"I say yes." The brown-haired girl emphasized again, she smiled and poked her white fingers straight at the iris, and retracted her hand rather bored after realizing the man's indifference, "Whether it's jumping off a cliff or Well, drowning is fine, let's die together."

"Really? That's great!" After only a second of astonishment, Mr. Dazai said with joy on his face, "Let me see, emmm... there is a nice river nearby~"

"Then let's go over there."

"Wow, you're such a hotheaded beauty. At least let me know your name."

"Fang's name?" The brown-haired girl tilted her head, blinked her eyes for the first time hearing such a term, and looked at the man suspiciously.

Rare... No, since Osamu Dazai made his great wish to die in love with the beautiful girl, it was the first time that the beautiful girl agreed. He was in a good mood and explained to the brown-haired girl with 12 points of patience. , "It's the name, the name. My name is Osamu Dazai, how about you, beautiful girl?"

"Name?" Countless bloody and violent memories filled his mind in an instant, "Xu...my name is Xu."

"Xu-chan~ What a nice name~" Osamu Dazai praised sincerely. Even with his critical eyes, this girl named Xu has soft long hair and a light brown color like a peaceful girl. The soothing moonlight at night, coupled with the soft facial features.

Most importantly, she promised to die in love with herself!

What a nice woman.

"So Xu-chan, I'll count to three later, and we'll jump down together~" With his excellent observation ability, Osamu Dazai dared to guarantee with his years of suicide experience that this river is different from the small water that he fell into in an emergency Ditches, both in depth and in velocity, are perfect suicide spots.

Looking at the busy man, he asked in a puzzled manner, "Shouldn't human beings be afraid of death?" It was the first time he saw such a strange man who would cheer for committing suicide.

"That's because human beings are deeply attracted by death while being afraid of death."

It was as if the door to a new world was slowly pushed open by this man in a bewitching tone, Xu Xu muttered to himself, "Afraid? Attracted?"

"That's right!" Osamu Dazai undoubtedly burst into 12-point enthusiasm for his lifelong dream. It is rare to meet such a like-minded person. The book of life belief "Complete Sex", Amway said forcefully, "It is this book that illuminates his lost lamb like a guiding light."

"Is it...?" Xu, who is known as a ghost, felt that human beings are indeed a kind of magical creature, and the tips of his ears moved, "The direction of the wind is about to change."

"Oh, so Xu-chan, I'll count to three and dance together~"

"..."

Immersed in the river water, the red eyes of the void god were empty, and sure enough... still can't die, it is really an 'evil ghost' who can't even control his own life and death.

"I'm really sorry, Osamu Dazai, but I'm a real evil spirit." It is precisely because he can't welcome the arrival of death that Xu is also very indifferent to the passing of life, "It's rare to meet an interesting person. .”

"Oh, the beautiful girl is really destined for us to meet again~" A frail and slender arm stretched out to him on the river bank, "Would you like to come up and warm up? It's really uncomfortable to be wet."

"!!!" The red pupils were full of disbelief, Xu took the hand full of kindness, ignoring his clothes that were still dripping, "Why are you still alive!"

"It's probably because the beauty goddess Izanah couldn't understand me and let me return to the human world from Santuchuan."

The very perfunctory answer made Xu a little angry, he suddenly straddled the man's waist with his strength, pinched the man's fair neck with both hands, with a little force, a bright red mark appeared on the man's neck.

"Oh, I'm really shy. I didn't expect Xu Jiang to be so proactive."

Contrary to the half-joking sweet tone that almost hinted at the words, Dazai’s almost sharp counterattack, a grappling hand pressed the bony Xu back, "But this is not allowed, I have said it before, I The latest ideal in life is to die in love with beautiful girls~"

"Why didn't you die?"

"Isn't Xujiang still alive? I waited for Xujiang in Santuchuan for a long time and I didn't see anyone. He was so lonely, so I came back to find you, but I was lucky. I didn't expect me to go down the river. Going straight down, I saw Xu Jiang~"

After realizing that he couldn't get any useful information out of this man, he took the hot soup from the man. Although he, as an Altana mutant, couldn't die like a monster, but... the feeling of being hungry was also very uncomfortable.

After drinking the hot soup, Xu seemed to think of something, and smiled sweetly, "Hey, Dazai-san, let's go jumping off the cliff together."

"Ah?" The man's pupils dilated slightly at the novelty of meeting a girl to die in love for the first time.

"I know there's a cliff nearby, and it's very high." He was so good that he was tied up straight by the villagers who used to get along well after learning about his weirdness and finding that even burning him with knives and chopping him could not kill him. Pushed off a cliff.

She lowered her head, let the too long bangs cover up the complexities in her eyes, and flicked the fire to invite the man.

"Okay."

"Then let's go now, before it gets dark."

Seeing the back of the girl running forward in a hurry, how should I put it, Mr. Dazai's mood is quite delicate.

If it weren't for the little slug with teeth and claws in his heart, Mr. Dazai thinks that Xu-chan is really a good wife candidate.

When he woke up from the bottom of the cliff again and saw a man with a smile on his face, Xu actually had the illusion that it was not surprising.

"What the hell are you?"

This height is definitely not something that can be explained by a simple sentence of good physical fitness, and he looked at the curly-haired man in front of him on guard.

"A guy who is full of strange clothes, even words and deeds, are you...a ghost?" Even Xu himself didn't realize that his expression at this time was as joyful as if he was about to cry.

Finally... the sense of joy that he was no longer alone was just a guess, and it was enough to make him tremble with excitement.

"This is a real human being."

Osamu Dazai smiled and rejected the girl's practice of directly changing his race when she disagreed with her.

He doesn't want to be classified as non-human by race like a little dwarf without knowing it.

"However, if Xu-chan is willing to spend this long night with me, I might be willing to tell you some of my secrets."

Faced with the swaying words of sexual harassment, his face was paralyzed, and he couldn't understand the man's appearance of winning everything in his hands.

Suddenly he reached out and grabbed the man's bandaged left hand and pressed it to his chest.

"Xu-chan is fine, there is still a chance to grow it in the future." Dazai Osamu comforted the flat touch of the palm of his hand in a sad tone.

Xu Xu sneered, "Who told you I'm a woman?"

"Alas??!!!"