Cannot breathe in

Mafu followed the instructions in the note left by Hiro, and went to the music theory classroom on the second floor after school.

"Mafu-san, why are you so nervous today? There was a broken sound just now." After Soraru pointed out his shortcomings, Mafu almost hid in the ground in shame. "I'm really sorry!"

Soraru is a bit surprised that Mafu, who was still complaining about him slightly yesterday, turned on the shy mode today "It doesn't matter Mafu-san, you just have to sing boldly, just like yesterday. And we have exchanged music together before Questions about it? It doesn’t matter.”

Mafu nodded reassuringly, and then started singing again.

When was this song written?

Seems like not long ago.

So when exactly?

At that time, Akatin persisted in contacting himself even though he was obviously alienated from him, and kept tweeting various content every day, adding @mafumafu at the end.

In fact, Mafu has read every tweet. Some of the trivial things in it can be memorized because Mafu has read it many times. For example, I was asked to cut my hair again today, and I found meat in the lunch box provided by the school. .

But he didn't reply at all.

Originally, I planned to stay close to Akatin, but I received an invitation from him to go out.

Tin Sang specially chose this day for his birthday. Tin Sang always thinks about him, like paying attention to his body when the alternation of cold and heat is not obvious, and putting on his coat when the weather is bad.

But now that we have made the decision to distance ourselves, we can't continue to do as we please.

So he called and rejected Akatin, and clearly heard the gasp on the other end of the phone the moment he refused.

Sorry, tin-san.

Afterwards, he participated in the birthday party organized by Tianyue and Soraru. In fact, he was not very in the mood to sing K with his friends, but Tianyue still came to his house and dragged him to the very famous KTV.

He never sang, because every time he opened his mouth, he remembered Akatin's deeply lost voice, which was dry and sour.

After finally being persuaded to pick up the microphone and sing a song vaguely, he huddled in a corner and checked Twitter listlessly. After a new refresh, a tweet popped up.

[@akatibitintin: mafu, I give up, I won't bother you anymore].

As if stung by this line of words, Mafu lost his grip on the phone and dropped it to the ground.

UN who went to the bathroom: c just came back, trotted and sat next to mafu "mafu, do you know who I saw just now? Akatin! It's been a long time since I saw him, do you want to say hello to him? It's at C66 Room." Seeing Mafu's cell phone dropped on the floor, he picked it up for him.

But Mafu was still shocked by what he said, Tin-sang is also in this ktv, so he must have seen it.

That's why I tweeted like this.

Mafu left early, walking on the street, all kinds of thoughts kept popping up in his mind.

Originally, I wanted to look at Akatin from afar, or touch him secretly, which was super satisfying.

But now, even Tin Sang has given up, right?My behavior of rejecting his invitation here, but turning around and going out with other people is simply unacceptable.

Later, on school day, I also saw Akatin, but that person would dodge the moment he caught my gaze, it could be said to be running away.

Mafu really doesn't know what to do, he wants to explain now, he wants to tell tin-sang that he doesn't find him annoying, and he can even tell him what he thinks.It turns out that after the real distance between the two sides is widened, it will feel so cold, which is even more sad than when I made up my mind before

Let's talk to him during the school meeting on Monday, it's not convenient for Tin Sang to avoid it if there are so many people.

When the second class ended on Monday, Mafu was crowded among the students going to the playground. It didn't feel good to be shoulder-to-shoulder, but he kept looking around where Akatin was.

Not far ahead, that touch of red is so conspicuous.

As long as mafu squeezes forward, he can grab his hand, or pat his shoulder, and tell him what he really thinks.

But at this moment, Mafu stopped involuntarily.

It's really simple to say what you think, but now the other party is within your reach, as long as you say something a little louder, he can hear you clearly, even the expressions and emotions are not let go .

But he dared not.

Speaking out means bearing two possibilities, one is that Akatin also accepts him, and forgives his indifference and alienation during this period; and the other...

The other one makes mafu dare not even think about it.

So, he stopped at this place.

Otherwise...wait until the club activities on Friday, there are very few people at that time, maybe the atmosphere is more suitable for a quiet conversation, right?

Well, it's Friday.

As a result, on Friday, Mafu was so nervous that he didn't even dare to go to the club activity room.After finally plucking up the courage to open the door of the activity room, I was told that Akatin did not come to participate in the club activities today, and he suddenly turned into a balloon that was pricked by a needle.

Well... next time.

Time and time again, mafu, who obviously does not have procrastination, suspects that he is a procrastinator.

As a result, I haven't said anything until now, and the relationship with Akatin-san has gradually become estranged. Mafu pinched the score sadly.

"Then let's start again, I think it's Mafu's song, you should be very familiar with it, so relax." Just as Soraru was about to press the keys, there was a bang, and the door was opened.

Koge was standing at the door with his schoolbag on his back, and was a little stunned when he saw someone inside.

After nodding politely to Soraru, he ignored Mafu and walked directly to the innermost table, took out a book with a red cover, and was about to leave the music theory classroom.

"Koge-san." Mafu called to stop Koge.

Koge stopped walking, "What's wrong, Mafumafu-san."

"akatin-san... is he okay?" Mafumafu asked hesitantly, "because I haven't seen him recently..." I was worried.

"Thanks to you, it's very good," Koge didn't show any expression on his face because his back was facing Mafumafu, but based on the tone of his voice, it can be deduced that it should be a half-smile mocking look, "temporarily out of danger."

Mafu was shocked all of a sudden, and Koge turned his head with that expression.

"akatin he...?"

"Mafumafu-san doesn't know yet, right?" Koge sneered and walked out of the music theory classroom after seeing Mafu's bewildered expression.

"..." Mafu still didn't understand what he just said.Are you joking, deliberately mocking him?Or is there something wrong with tin sang?

Soraru saw the weird atmosphere between the two just now, and what Koge said just now, and pressed the treble key, "Mafumafu-san, are you okay?"

Mafu still didn't speak.

"If the akatin-san you are talking about is Koge-san's friend, I remember a few days ago... About two weeks ago, I was found unconscious at the [-]-chome, and it is said that I haven't woken up until now." Soraru began to play the prelude "Mafu, don't you know? I remember that you used to have a good relationship. This matter is kept secret, but several of Akatin-san's friends know about it, and I also learned about it from one of my juniors."

In a coma?

Akatin?

Mafu was almost overwhelmed by the continuous news.

How long ago was that?Why don't I know anything about it?

No wonder I haven't seen Akatin in school recently, and I haven't updated on Twitter, and I didn't even participate in DC's end-of-the-month performance.

"If you're so worried, I'll help you ask." Soraru picked up the phone, looked up the student's number, and dialed.

"...Hi, I'm Soraru, it's like this, you said before, about the coma of your classmate Akatin in the first grade, my friend has some questions to ask you...Mafumafu-san in the second grade...Okay... ...I'll give him the phone."

Mafu picked up the phone "Hi, hello."

"Mafumafu-san, right?" There was a gentle male voice on the other side of the phone, with a gentle voice, "I am Shi Gandang, a first-year student."

"For all your questions about Akatin, in fact, Koge-san told us not to disclose it to you, but you are willing to ask Soraru-san to call me this number, which means that you still care about Tintin."

"Besides, tintin cares about you very much. If he is conscious now, he should very much hope that you can come to visit him."

"Two weeks ago, tintin was found unconscious in Erchome. Fortunately, he was rescued in time and is now out of danger. But he hasn't woken up yet. As for the reason, he has no clue."

"Now Tintin is still in the Central Hospital, Ward 1034, and the visiting hours are from 11:30 am to [-]:[-] am."

"No matter what, I've always taken tintin's matter into my eyes. You are a very important person to him. Even during the time you have been ignoring him, he never gave up contacting you again. Now Koge-san has been Nursing him there with tintin's mother, if it's convenient, please visit him."

"Please... Mafu-san."

Mafu didn't say a word from the beginning to the end, and the hand holding the phone kept shaking. He tried his best to press the phone to his ear, but he opened his mouth but didn't know what to say.

Until the other side hung up the phone, Mafu was still standing there holding the phone.

After a long time, Soraru called him "mafu."

Mafu hurriedly returned the phone to Soraru as if he had woken up, and bowed deeply, "Thank you, Soraru-san, but I'm sorry that I may not be able to practice with you today, please forgive me."

Soraru didn't speak, just nodded.

Immediately, Mafu rushed out of the music theory classroom.

The clear and handsome senior was leaning on the piano, staring at the school uniform and tie being lifted by the wind, and the lock screen of the phone was on.

On the way to the hospital, Mafu felt that he had never felt such regret.

Obviously, they decided to keep a distance in order not to hurt each other, but the current situation is completely beyond their expectations.I may have to let go of akatin forever.

Mafu you are an asshole.

With this in mind, Mafu, who climbed up to the tenth floor without even waiting for the elevator, came to Ward 1034 out of breath.

Tin Sang is inside.

Pushing open the door, the room was clean and bright white, and the beeping sound of the pacemaker was particularly obvious in the ward. Akatin was lying on the hospital bed directly opposite the door, with his small nose fluttering slightly under the oxygen mask, crying The pure white bedding in the ward made his already pale face even paler.

Mafu stepped forward involuntarily, wanting to see Akatin's current situation more clearly.

"You are……?"

Mafu turned his head suddenly, and there was a woman sitting on the escort bed behind her, holding an apple in her left hand and a fruit knife in her right, with a pair of green eyes resembling akatin.

The woman looked at him, and he looked back at the woman.

"Hey... Could it be Akatin's classmate?" The woman suddenly realized after a long time, "Thank you for coming to see Akatin, may I ask your name...?"

"...mafumafu," Mafu said, and after finishing the sentence in a hoarse voice, he suddenly bowed deeply to Akatin's mother, "My name is Mafumafu."

"Ah, hello Mafumafu, I don't have anything to entertain you here, please sit down."

Mafu sat on the right side of the accompanying bed, still staring at Akatin on the hospital bed. Akatin's mother saw mafu like this, and thought of her son's current situation, and couldn't help feeling sad, "Tin's father is gone, and it would be troublesome for me to take care of him alone. Fortunately, I have you as his friends, otherwise I really don't know what to do..."

"...Auntie, did the doctor say how long Tin Sang will be like this?"

"Now I haven't even found the reason for the coma, let alone predicting when I will wake up." Akatin's mother touched Akatin's quiet face with red eyes. "This child has been happy since he was a child, even when his father passed away. In order not to make me sad, I have been forced to smile, I used to joke with him [why are you so noisy], but now it's quiet... I would rather he was alive and kicking."

"When he was fine before, I had no time to spend with him because I had to support the family alone, and he was very considerate and never complained... Now that I think about it, there are really many people who want to care about him and tell him, but I haven't Chance to say it... In the future, I don't know if there will be a chance for him to hear it with his own ears..." While saying this, she shed tears.

Mafu was still staring blankly at Akatin on the hospital bed.

I also have a lot to say to you.

"Auntie," Mafu looked into Akatin's mother's eyes, "Please let me help you take care of Tin."

"I'm really grateful for this, but now that Koge and the others are helping to take care of me, I won't be too busy," Akatin's mother smiled gratefully, "I'm very happy that you have such a heart."

"Please let me come," Mafu bowed again, "Akatin-san is a very important person to me. I didn't have time to say a lot to him before, so now I feel very regretful. I want to make up for it. everything."

Akatin's mother looked at the handsome young man in front of her in surprise, and sighed, "You are so persistent, how could I refuse you."

"Thank you very much."

Tin, I want to tell you everything I haven't had time to tell you.

After returning home, Mafu collapsed on the bed without even changing his clothes, staring at the ceiling motionless.Too much happened today, and he couldn't accept it at all.

Hiro's message was placed on the bedside, and Mafu picked it up and wanted to read it, but found that his eyes couldn't focus at all, and his eyes were sore and swollen.

I rubbed it with the back of my hand, but found it was abnormally wet.

He stared blankly at the big drops of tears falling on the back of his hand.

It's so strange, my heart is obviously not so sad, it's obviously not sad, it's obviously...

Obviously he cared so much, obviously his body was numb from the pain, obviously...

Obviously I like you, but I can't do anything.

Trembling, he picked up the pen and wiped the tears off his face.

"Hiro-san, I'm in deep confusion right now.I like him, I know. 』

Akatin was a little shocked and disappointed when he got this endless message.

Mafu has someone he likes?

Are you struggling with whether to confess?But... Akatin caressed the wrinkled page that had been soaked in water. He lay prone on the table as soon as he woke up, with a tight feeling on his face that the mixture of water and salt evaporated.

Is this kind of tangled and crying situation really a happy love?

Forget it...Even if it's a relationship, I should congratulate Mafu properly. Has this social barrier finally found someone he likes?Suppressing the discomfort in his heart, Akatin read the message.

Eh?

Akatin suddenly discovered that the "he" used by mafu is actually a male pronoun.

Mafu... in love with a boy?

Akatin, whose expression was frightened, gripped the already crumpled paper tightly.

Which boy is it?Tianyue?With the friendship between him and Mafu for so many years, it will be normal for him to have a relationship with each other for a long time.

Suddenly Soraru's face appeared in Akatin's mind.That's right, mafu has always been looking forward to Senior Soraru, and he will know it himself. Soraru-san is very handsome, and he is also very considerate when getting along with people. Although he is a bit cold, it is also a personal characteristic. Now we have close contact like this I will fall in love even more... It is only natural to fall in love with Soraru.

Akatin sighed, glanced to the right inadvertently, and found that if he didn't start again, he would be late.

"God, I'm not even allowed to eat breakfast."

In class, Akatin couldn't understand at all, because Mafumafu was a grade higher than him, so the things taught in class were like heavenly scriptures to him, but his habit since he was a child was never to sleep in class, so the teacher would not respect him.

But I really want to sleep.

Akatin finished a class in this nodding state. When the get out of class was over, he planned to go around the corridor in order to wake himself up.

Akatin who was about to go downstairs met Soraru who came upstairs.

Because of what happened this morning, Akatin looked at Soraru with some embarrassment, "Ah, good morning Soraru-san."

Soraru smiled politely when he saw him, "Good morning."

The two exchanged some pleasantries, and Soraru thought of something, "Did Mafumafu-san visit Akatin-san in the hospital yesterday? Is everything okay?"

Akatin's eyes widened suddenly "What?"