Love him deep into bone marrow Jian Hanfeng Chengyou

After that day, Xiaoyan's situation became even worse. After a person has experienced frustration and despair, that kind of gloom will come out from the bottom of his eyes.

He was not interested in anything at first, and spent more and more time in a daze.

Yin Jingnan took Xiaoyan to see a psychiatrist, who was diagnosed with severe depression. He had to take medicine on time every day, and he had to rely on stability to fall asleep at night.

Yin Jingnan was very worried that Xiaoyan's condition would worsen, so he had to spend more time with him. Usually, if he really didn't have time, he would ask the nanny to watch him and not let him stay alone.

All the sharp things in the house were put away and stored in a place that Xiaoyan couldn't reach.

But even though Yin Jingnan arranged everything carefully, the worst result still happened.

That night the nanny had to ask for leave, Yin Jingnan rejected the dinner party and stayed at home with Xiaoyan, he only went downstairs to cook a bowl of noodles, and when he went upstairs the world was turned upside down.

The boy was lying quietly on the bed, looking as if he was asleep, while an empty white medicine bottle was lying on the floor, with a few white pills spilled beside it.

He swallowed a whole bottle of Valium.

Yin Jingnan felt cold all over and his mind was blank. When he realized it, he had already picked up Xiaoyan and ran downstairs quickly, racing to the hospital.

Xiaoyan was pushed into the emergency room and underwent gastric lavage. The doctor still said the same thing, but fortunately, he was sent in time and there was no serious problem.

Yin Jingnan couldn't close his eyes all night. He thought of the night when the child died, and the time was so difficult. He almost lost even Xiaoyan.

This is definitely not what he wants to see.

Xiaoyan woke up at ten o'clock the next morning. The sky outside the window was as white as ever, without sunlight. At first, he thought he was dead.

It is said that people who commit suicide cannot go to heaven, but will go to hell.

The hell in front of him doesn't seem so scary.

It was only later that he discovered that he was still alive. Yin Jingnan was sitting on the chair beside the bed, looking at him with tearful eyes, as if he was angry.

Xiaoyan didn't care about anything anymore, so naturally he was not afraid of his anger, so he raised his hand and gestured with difficulty.

"what……"

Why save me.

Yin Jingnan stared at him, his deep voice trembling slightly.

"Why do stupid things."

Xiaoyan was silent for a moment, gestured with red eyes.

I am in pain.

Yin Jingnan took a deep breath, his eyes were red.

"Have you ever thought about it, you are dead, what should I do?"

"Do you want me to feel guilty for the rest of my life?"

Tears flowed silently from the corner of Xiaoyan's eyes, he lowered his eyes, his slender eyelashes trembled only occasionally, and gestured quietly.

I am sorry.

But I feel that I will only trouble you if I live.

I'm dead, so you don't have to waste time on me.

Yin Jingnan's heart ached unbearably, he didn't know how to face such Xiaoyan, he tentatively stretched out his hand to hold Xiaoyan's hand, and tightened it a little bit.

"Xiaoyan, you are very important to me, and I am willing to take care of you."

"I beg you, live, please."

Xiaoyan withdrew his hand silently, turned his back to Yin Jingnan, his brows were furrowed from crying, but there was no sound.

In fact, sometimes it's not that he doesn't want to live.

But when despair surrounded him from all directions, he became a drowning man who fell to the bottom of the sea, suffering so much that he couldn't breathe.

There is a voice in his heart that keeps telling him that as long as he dies, there is nothing to be afraid of, let alone pain.

The boy's body trembled invisibly, and Yin Jingnan knew he was crying.

Get up and sit down on the edge of the bed, put your big palm on his back, and said softly.

"Xiaoyan, stop crying."

"When you're better, I'll take you out to relax, okay?"

"We can go wherever you want, even abroad."

Yin Jingnan knew that Xiaoyan was very painful, and that depression was an uncontrollable disease, otherwise there would not be so many people committing suicide. If they could live, who would want to die?

It's the hurdle in my heart that I can't get over.

Yin Jingnan held Xiaoyan's shoulders and turned him gently. Xiaoyan instinctively covered his eyes with his hands, not wanting the other party to see his distressed appearance.

Yin Jingnan persisted, pulled Xiaoyan's hand away, and wiped away the tears from the corners of his eyes with his fingertips, his gentle voice seemed to overflow with water.

"Do not cry."

Under Yin Jingnan's comfort, Xiaoyan gradually calmed down, but there was still a pool of stagnant water in his eyes.

After gastric lavage, he was very weak and could only eat some liquid food. Yin Jingnan asked his assistant to buy a bowl of smashed meat porridge, and fed it to Xiaoyan.

Then he took out the tablet from the drawer and looked at the boy leaning on the bed.

"I'm afraid you'll be bored, so I brought the ipad from home, do you want to play for a while?"

Xiaoyan shook his head, lay down slowly, and stared out the window in a daze.

The winter in Beijing is so cold that there are not even a single bird.

Otherwise, you can still hear the vibrant singing of birds.

They all flew south.

Yin Jingnan had no choice but to put the tablet back in the drawer, looked at Xiaoyan and asked softly.

"Don't you want to chat with me?"

It took a long time for Xiaoyan to respond to him, raising his hand and gesticulating.

"what……"

I have nothing left.

Yin Jingnan paused, "You still have me."

Xiaoyan stopped talking, looked out of the window intently, and gestured to him again after a while.

"what……"

If only you hadn't picked me up back then.

Yin Jingnan frowned slightly, his heart ached, "Why do you say such things all of a sudden?"

Xiaoyan's expression became a little erratic, but he was always calm, and he gestured intermittently.

If I had died last winter, I would never have met you.

would not like you.

There will be no baby.

It won't be painful.

Yin Jingnan didn't like the fact that he kept talking about whether he was dead or not, so he interrupted, "Xiaoyan."

Knowing that he was unhappy, Xiaoyan stopped talking.

Yin Jingnan took a deep breath and said, "You are still very young, and you still have a long way to go."

"..."

Yes, he was still very young, but he was already as old as an old man on the verge of death, and he found it difficult to live a moment longer in this world.

Xiaoyan fell asleep again.

After spending a few days in the hospital, Yin Jingnan was discharged from the hospital with Xiaoyan when his body was almost recovered.

Xiaoyan's physical and mental condition is not particularly good, so it is not suitable for him to go too far away. After thinking about it, Yin Jingnan decided to take him to a hot spring resort to relax.

In the cold winter, soaking in hot springs may warm your heart.

Yin Jingnan thought so.

After returning home in the afternoon and packing his luggage, Yin Jingnan took Xiaoyan and set off. The resort is located in the capital city, a two-hour drive, and it was exactly [-]:[-] pm when he arrived, just in time for dinner.

The food in the hotel is very rich, Yin Jingnan called Jiang Heng and Yuan Qing, they arrived with their wives halfway through the dinner, added a lot of dishes, and the group ate very hotly.

Those two are good brothers of Yin Jingnan, their family backgrounds are similar, they have been on good terms since childhood.

In the past two years, they have had families one after another, but Yin Jingnan is still single. Yin Jingnan doesn't like to publicize their relationship, so they don't know that Yin Jingnan likes Cheng Wen. Jiang Heng and Yuan Qing knew about the family.

At the party before, Yin Jingnan never let go of his insinuations, and only said that he regarded Xiaoyan as his younger brother. This time, he took his younger brother out for vacation, which is a bit confusing.

Jiang Heng is straightforward, shaved, with sharp and handsome features, and he has an air of soldier ruffian that cannot be ignored. He has inherited his family's old practice, and he has been in the army at a young age. He is usually serious in front of his subordinates. Very, I was a little out of tune in front of my friends, so I just opened my mouth to ask.

"You two together?"

Yin Jingnan was serving food for Xiaoyan, when he heard this, he raised his eyes and glanced at Jiang Heng, "Don't talk nonsense."

Jiang Heng curled his lips disapprovingly, "Damn, you're so boring, I think you two look like a couple, otherwise you wouldn't bring your younger brother out on honeymoon."

Xiaoyan froze, and silently lowered her head to eat.

The young man next to Jiang Heng reached under the table and twisted his leg, and said in a low voice.

"Don't talk nonsense, eat yours."

Jiang Heng hissed, not daring to speak out, and grinningly picked up a piece of stir-fried beef and put it in the youth bowl.

"Yes, listen to my wife."

Xiaoyan stared blankly at the actions of the two people opposite him.

He recognized the young man beside Jiang Heng and knew his name was Yan Yan.

I've seen it on TV before, and it's a very famous movie star.

There is a very small mole at the end of the young man's eyes, his appearance is gentle and heroic, which makes people feel very pleasing to the eye.

But what attracted Xiaoyan's attention was not his appearance, but the intimate interaction between the two.

Sensing Xiaoyan's gaze, Yan Yan smiled at him friendly, Xiaoyan lowered his head subconsciously, showing a bit of embarrassment.

It turns out that Yin Jingnan's friends and lovers are all such outstanding people.

No wonder Yin Jingnan didn't like him.

He just doesn't deserve him.

Yin Jingnan turned to look at Xiaoyan, saw that he was distracted, and patted his head.

"Why are you in a daze, eat quickly."

Xiaoyan nodded and put something into his mouth quietly.

"Is your brother in school?" The person who spoke was Yuan Qing.

Yuan Qing and Yin Jingnan are both businessmen, they run a listed company, they feel deserted, and the same is true of their appearance, usually they don't talk much, but Yin Jingnan was a little surprised when he asked a question suddenly.

"No."

"It might be considered later."

Yuan nodded lightly.

He didn't seem to be in a good mood, he kept his face cold and didn't speak anymore, he kept pouring red wine into his mouth, the obviously older man beside him reached out to grab the wine from Yuan Qing's hand, Yuan Qing frowned.

"Do not touch me."

The man's face was a little pale, and he sighed, "Don't be angry, I promise you."

"That's more or less the same." Yuan chuckled lightly, like a child who has been patted down.

Shooting small videos is a bit difficult for a man who has always been honest and reserved.

Unexpectedly, his lover was angry with him for several days because of this, so Li Yulin had no choice but to compromise.

It was past nine o'clock after dinner, and the group went back to their respective rooms.

The hot spring here is independent, and there is a hot spring pool in each courtyard. Yin Jingnan is going to take Xiaoyan to soak for half an hour before going to sleep, maybe his sleep will be better.

After taking off their clothes, the two went down.

The night was quiet and silent, and the atmosphere was a bit awkward.

After all, the two had a close relationship.

Yin Jingnan looked at the night scene in the distance and forced himself not to think too much. Xiaoyan seemed to notice his discomfort, so he called him and gestured hesitantly.

"what……"

Are you going to do it.

Xiaoyan knows that Yin Jingnan doesn't like him, but adults have normal needs, and if he needs it, it's understandable for him to help him.