i don't want to have children

The next day, Yu He went to Ji Shi Hospital.The day before, he had made an appointment with the Department of Urology and Endocrinology online.

This is the only way to confirm whether Xu An has been to Jishi Hospital for treatment.

There is no trace of any surgery on Xu Anan's body. He is just seeking medical advice, and there will be no records of him in the hospital.

Back at the hospital again, Yu He's heart was beating violently.After all, it was the place where I used to work.Now, coming to this place again, Yu He has a sense of unreality of past and present lives.

It was the twelfth month of the lunar calendar, and the weather was still cloudy and cold, but the hospital was not affected in the slightest, and it was full of people and very lively.

Yu He, who was a little sad at first, couldn't help but smile because of the fast pace and noise in the hospital.

This is still the environment he is familiar with and likes.

I just don't know if it is possible for me to return to this place in the future.

He hung up Director Wang of the Department of Urology.Although they were in the same building before, they were separated by a few floors, so they knew each other, but they were not familiar with each other.

Although it was an appointment, Yu He still waited for more than an hour because there were too many patients coming and going.

When the big screen displayed his name, he walked in.

The medical records in Yu He's hand were blank.Director Wang looked through his medical records, apparently he had no impression of Xu An.

Yu He believes that with Xu An's physical condition, any doctor will never forget him.After all, for the vast majority of doctors, bisexuality only exists in the academic field. Although there are many such cases in reality, there are not many people who actually see a doctor.

Director Wang swiped his card and routinely asked Yu He what symptoms he had.

Yu He didn't talk about it in detail, but said vaguely that there was some abnormality in his body.But only mentioned the beginning, the other party has already glanced over very sensitively.

This is professional intuition.

"Can you be more specific." Director Wang said kindly.

But Yu He is not ready to continue, just trying to ask, "I came here half a year ago. The doctor who made an appointment..."

Dr. Wang smiled, "I've been here before, but it's definitely not me. If it was me, I must know you. Did you make an appointment with another doctor last time..."

Indeed, there are five doctors in one urology department.

"It seems that I remembered wrongly." Yu He apologized.

Having achieved his goal, Yu He didn't go into details, but found an excuse and came out of the outpatient room.

This is also common for doctors.

Some patients who come to see a doctor are hesitant due to various concerns and distrust of doctors and hospitals.But the right to decide is their own, and doctors have no right to interfere.

It's a pity, although the patient didn't say it clearly, but from his secretive attitude and hesitant tone, Dr. Wang had some associations and guesses.But the other party doesn't seem to trust the hospital very much.This is also impossible.

After leaving the Department of Urology, Yu He went up two more floors to the Department of Endocrinology.Using the same method, they came to the conclusion that Xu An did not come to see a doctor.

Coming out of the Department of Endocrinology, Yu He hesitated for a moment and passed by the surgery clinic nearby.

Room 308 was still overcrowded, and the waiting room outside was full of people.The assistant Feng Xiao came out from inside and shouted in a clear and impatient voice: No. 156, where is the person in No. 156...

Yu He glanced inside, a middle-aged man in his 40s wearing a white coat was seeing a doctor.

Yu He walked past the door without stopping.

Yu He asked Yu Qianli for leave, and it took three or four days to finish all the doctors or doctors in the Department of Endocrinology and Urology.The answer is still futile.No doctor left an impression on Xu An.

After running for several days, Yu He was exhausted both physically and mentally.

Chu Lingdong was also busy these few days, although he called him every day, he never came over.

But Yu He saw Chu Lingdong twice on the TV news.Once, as an outstanding entrepreneur representative, he attended a national entrepreneurial forum held in N City.The camera swept across the front row, although it was only a few seconds, but Yu He still saw him.

Once it was a first-line political column on the radio station.Chu Lingdong appeared as a special guest.One of them involves real estate. Citizen representatives hold the mayor accountable for the high housing prices in City N year after year.

The mayor made a statement from the environment and development of City N, and promised that many excellent real estate projects are under construction. Then, on behalf of the real estate industry, Chu Lingdong gave a brief explanation of the city's real estate market.

What Chu Lingdong said, Yu He didn't listen to a word, but just stared at him without blinking.

Chu Lingdong on the TV, dressed in suits and leather shoes, was personable, and he had an indescribable charm with his gestures.

Looking at it, Yu He felt a little lost.

It seems that Chu Lingdong is busy.

It's just that I don't know why Tian Qiao went to Chu Lingdong last time for business.How is this business going?Yu He thought to himself.

On Thursday, Yu He took the initiative to contact Chen Lanzhi and made an appointment for her with a psychologist.Chen Lanzhi was still complaining, but she hadn't paid off the debt she owed, so she could only wrong herself first and come here.

In the past, she could and dared to do anything for money.What's more, it's just asking her to go to the hospital.

Since Xu An was seven years old, Chen Lanzhi brought Xu An to N City for medical treatment. N City is the provincial capital, so he found a place to rent a house on the edge of the nearby radiating city. Xu An went to school while seeking medical treatment.

The next day, Chen Lanzhi took the first long-distance bus and arrived at Jishi Hospital after a two-hour drive.

Because it was an appointment, and the psychology department was not so crowded compared to other departments, Chen Lanzhi was called in for the first time.

The doctor was about forty and experienced, and he recognized her at a glance.I made a few jokes with her, asked some medical symptoms, did some test questions, frowned again, thought for a while, and prescribed medicine.

Chen Lanzhi had a good impression of this doctor, she didn't seem to treat him as a patient at all.I even chatted with her, and after asking her address, I said: It's so far away, it's not easy.

is not easy.But it's not for money.

When Chen Lanzhi came out of the hospital, it was still early, so she took the bus directly to the long-distance station.She was still waiting for a long time for the next trip, so she took a photo of the hospital and the medicine she took, and sent it to Yu He.

Within 2 minutes, she received a transfer notification on her mobile phone.

What this son is doing now is beyond her comprehension.It obviously made her upset and annoying, but she still came to see a doctor according to what he said.

But immediately after, Yu He called.Chen Lanzhi answered the phone.

"The money has been transferred to you." Yu He said.

"En." Chen Lanzhi was a little too lazy to respond.

It took a few seconds to say, "When are you going back?"

Chen Lanzhi couldn't help but snorted again.When she was looking for Chu Lingdong in the past, the boss would arrange for her to stay here for one night, and then Chu Lingdong's secretary, Xiao Wu, would book a ticket for her to take the high-speed train back.Although it takes a detour to take the high-speed rail, which takes almost the same time as taking a long-distance bus, she feels comfortable in her heart.

This time, it is estimated that this son will not give her travel expenses.While it was still early, it was better for her to go back directly.

"Leave right away."

"Where are you now?"

"Long-distance station."

"Wait, I'll take you back," said the other side.

Chen Lanzhi was stunned.In the past, Xu An didn't even want to see him, let alone see her off.And I have already arrived at the station, what can I give away.

But it's still early.She didn't comment either.

When seeing Yu He, Chen Lanzhi slanted the corner of her mouth.She thought that Yu He would come in Chu Lingdong's expensive car, although she didn't recognize the license plate.But Yu He got off the taxi.

And it seems that he walked in a panic, without wearing anything to keep out the cold.

Today is a severe cold.The weather has been gloomy.The weather forecast says there will be light snow at night.

"What? Is Boss Chu having a conflict, or was he dumped?" Chen Lanzhi said sarcastically.

Yu He didn't answer, just asked her, "Did you buy the ticket?"

"No." A ticket is more than 100, since Yu He said that he would come to see her off, he must buy the ticket for himself.

Sure enough, Yu He turned around and entered the station, and came out after a while, holding two tickets in his hand.

It was only then that Chen Lanzhi realized that what Yu He said about sending her off was to send her home.She looked suspicious, for more than ten years, Xu An didn't go back much.

Which show is this playing now?

"Is there really a conflict with Boss Chu?" Although Chen Lanzhi ridiculed this son in his heart, he didn't want him to really have a falling out with Chu Lingdong.

She knew the details of this son.He is not good enough for that boss Chu.

If he was really dumped, he might never meet someone like that in his whole life.

"No. Just go back and have a look." Yu He's eyes aimed at the gate of the station.The bus they were about to take had not yet arrived.

Chen Lanzhi didn't believe it at all. "Go back and see what?"

And that place, what is there to see.In her memory, everything is gray.When she was in school, she thought about being like other young people in the same town, working with her husband to earn money with both hands, and settling down in the city.

But because of this son, all her thoughts were cut off.

And that distant sister in the same town, Chu Lingdong's mother, lived a completely different life from her because she didn't have these burdens.Although she died early, she would be willing to replace it with herself.

She wants another way of life.

The bus pulled into the station, and the arrival announcement sounded at the station.Yu He picked up the small bag on the ground for Chen Lanzhi, and walked over first.

The long-distance bus was fairly clean, but it was the end of the year and it was full of people.There are two seats, Yu He sat on the inside, and Chen Lanzhi sat on the outside.

Yu He moved in several directions, but he couldn't stretch his legs, it was very crowded.

The car started, and everyone in the aisle found their seats and sat down, and the car became much quieter.

"When was the last time you saw me coming out of the hospital?" Yu He asked in a spare moment.

Chen Lanzhi stared at Yu He with a pair of eyes like nails.This doesn't feel like a random question.

"Didn't I fall once, and I can't remember some things clearly." Yu He said.

After a fall, my mind becomes blurred. Chen Lanzhi has heard a lot about it.There are also examples in the town.But because of the loss of memory, his temperament also changed, which is rare.

Thinking about it this way, Chen Lanzhi hoped that he would fall more.

"Only two times, maybe half a year, I went to the city to look for you and saw you coming out of that hospital."

As he spoke, he suddenly became alert, "What are you doing there? Are you still thinking about having surgery?" Chen Lanzhi asked.

"No." Yu He said.

Chen Lanzhi looked at Yu He's stomach again.Now, he turned salty fish over by relying on his stomach.

It's not that she doesn't know this son.Even if I really wanted to have an operation, it was only for a while.

When I was thirteen or fourteen years old.It was then that he began to realize that he was different from others.Unlike when I was a child, I was the only one who was anxious.

But his situation is too special.The organs of both men and women are very complete, and it is a long and continuous process to really do treatment.I have to take hormones for several years, and I have to have surgery continuously.

Neither she nor he can afford the time, and she doesn't have the money at all.I have seen both Chinese medicine and Western medicine, and I died of this heart.

After that period of time, Xu An no longer thought about treatment.I didn't see how troubled he was, he just loved hanging around outside.When I was in high school, I started not going home.

Chen Lanzhi couldn't even control herself, and of course she couldn't control him either.

The long-distance bus was really painful for Yu He, his legs couldn't be straightened, and his waist also ached.After more than two hours, we finally arrived at our destination.

It took another half an hour by bus from the urban area to the town, and it was nearly three o'clock when we arrived.

The market town, like all market towns, is crowded and dilapidated.Although after several rounds of various establishment activities, the new wind of civilization has not yet blown completely. Although it is considered clean, the streets are full of small merchants and hawkers.

The town is basically small buildings with three or four floors.People live above, and shops below.

Yu He followed behind Chen Lanzhi without saying a word, crossed the main road, entered the trail, and turned for a long time before stopping at one place.

Chen Lanzhi rented two bungalows.The landlord's sons settled down in the city and took the old man there. They had no intention of rebuilding the house here, so they gave the house to Chen Lanzhi in the form of a big sale.This is now her home.

The house is tiled.It was originally white, but now it is yellowed, damaged, and dull, as if it has been covered with a layer of dirt.

Chen Lanzhi went directly into a room, presumably to change clothes.

There is another room next to it, Yu He reckons it should be Xu An's residence, so he pushed the door and walked in.The moment he entered, his heart beat irregularly again.

The furnishings in the room are very simple, almost clear at a glance.

A single bed and a simple combined bookshelf.There are few books in the bookshelf.There are several posters on the wall.There are macho men with pectoral and abdominal muscles exposed, and there are also shy little fresh meat.It seems that Xu An was aware of her sexual orientation from the very beginning.And not like myself.

Yu He opened the drawer.A few litters, and a few magazines.I don't know where Xu An got it from, but it's the usual taste and aesthetics, full of sensual and lustful men and women.Pull open the wardrobe.Yu He was surprised by the amount of clothes in the closet.

This should be Xu An's high school clothes, but it is already very ugly.

Yu He closed the door of the cabinet, crawled on the ground with difficulty, and looked under the bed.Sure enough, there was a small wooden box underneath.

Yu He's heart beat uncontrollably a few times.

He dragged the box out from under the bed.

The box is not big, like a big box.When Yu He pressed the switch, his hand paused.

For a moment he didn't know whether he hoped to find something or not.

But Yu He still opened the box.For a moment, he was stunned for a moment, and in the next moment, a red tide surged on his face.

Put several adult toys of different shapes and sizes inside.And condoms wrapped in plastic.

Yu He snapped the box shut, squatted on the ground again, and stuffed it back under the bed.

Nothing was found.

For Xu An, who is seventeen or eighteen years old, the only secret is the contents of the box.

Yu He sat down.Because of the dilapidated and icy tiles, the room was too gloomy and cold, and Yu He felt that it was even colder than outside.

After sitting for a while, my legs felt a little numb.

Yu He stood up, pushed the door to go out, and ran into Chen Lanzhi who was about to come in.

Although Chen Lanzhi and Xu An are natural enemies, this is also the first time he has returned home in many years.

"What do you want to eat? I'll cook something."

It's three o'clock now.Both of them didn't eat anything at noon.

Yu He shook his head, "I'm leaving now."

Chen Lanzhi's eyes widened at once, and the next moment, she sneered habitually.This son is still the same as before, looking down on her and this place.

Chen Lanzhi suddenly became angry, "Get out. Get out of here, and don't come back to me."

Yu He stood for a while, "Next week I will give you a call ahead of time, remember to come here early."

Said, went out.

Regardless of the grievances between Xu An and Chen Lanzhi, they are mother and son after all.For a long time, Xu An didn't take Chen Lanzhi's hard work seriously.

Now, although I am not Xu An, but with this body, it is rare to come back, but within ten minutes, the chair is not warm, so I have to leave again.

Yu He apologized to Chen Lanzhi in his heart.

At six o'clock in the afternoon, Yu He got on the bus back to N city again.When getting on the train, Yu He bought two pieces of bread at the canteen at the station, and ate a few mouthfuls indiscriminately.

It was dark.Halfway through the bus, snowflakes were already falling.The car slowed down, and it was nearly 9 o'clock when we arrived in N City.

Two times a day by car, Yu He sat stiff and numb.When I got out of the car, the station was groggy.The snowflakes seem to be getting bigger again.

The crowd in the car rushed down to the taxi parked at the door.

In this weather, taxis were nervous, but after Yu He got out of the station, the taxis had already been robbed.

Going out in a hurry, not wearing a scarf or gloves, and sitting in meditation for a long time, the blood is not flowing smoothly, Yu He almost shivered.After waiting for ten minutes, I didn't catch a taxi.

At this moment, Yu He suddenly wanted to see Chu Lingdong immediately.

He hadn't seen him for almost a week.

I didn't even receive my daily routine calls today.

I know that Chu Lingdong is busy, but if I call him now, no matter what he is doing, he will probably rush over to pick me up immediately.

As soon as this thought came up, Yu He became a little anxious.He took out his mobile phone from his pocket, but before he found Chu Lingdong's name, he calmed down.

It took only half an hour to take a taxi back.He didn't need to ask Chu Lingdong to come.

Moreover, Yu He felt embarrassed about his sudden impulsiveness and inexplicable confidence.

Yu He temporarily changed to flipping other plots.

After pressing on WeChat, Wu Ruanruan's picture, which seemed to be swiping the screen, was the first to shine in front of his eyes.

Each picture has only one male protagonist.In the bustling crowd, a birthday hat was worn, and small red, blue and blue broken fireworks fell on the shoulders, shining brightly in the candlelight.It was Chu Lingdong.

And Tian Qiao, who was standing next to him, touched Chu Lingdong's collar with his hands, as if he was trying to wipe something, or just caressing him.