What should I do if the object of the date is my first love!

The love story of his parents has always been a well-known story among relatives. Whenever relatives visited when he was a child, some people would compliment his mother for his insight and understanding, and compliment his father for living up to the trust.

The rich lady falls in love with her poor classmate. The poor student studies very well, is very talented and talented, and has a bright future. But the poor student is not only poor at home, but also has a sick mother who needs to be taken care of. When the money was not enough, he simply broke off the relationship with his family, dropped out of school and worked, took care of his mother-in-law, and worked hard to make money for poor students to go to school; I like her, because she always talks inside and outside: my son is a university teacher, you haven't graduated from a single university, if it weren't for my son's love and affection, he would have divorced you long ago.Even when she was dying, her father was busy evaluating titles, and even her mother took care of the future generations, but she never said a good word about her mother until she closed her eyes.

But his mother didn't care. He had heard more than one time when his mother was chatting with the neighbor's aunt, she said with a gentle smile, "It doesn't matter, as long as he treats me well."

My mother is really capable and has a good temper. She takes care of the family and works diligently. But the most important time when she was promoted, her grandmother suddenly became seriously ill, so she gave up without saying a word. Opportunity, please take care of the day and night of the big vacation.Even so, no complaints.

He has always believed as everyone said: he believes that the marriage relationship between his parents is full of love.Their family is as happy as a textbook, and the husband and wife are harmonious.

And now, his father looked at his mother like a madman, and said

"We really love each other"

How jarring.

For the first time, he realized how disgusting these words were.

Is it enough to fall in love?Can love hurt others unscrupulously?

His nerves, which had been dull for a long time, began to think for the first time.

Really, is it enough to just fall in love?

He hugged his trembling mother, feeling that he was trembling too, and his ears were full of mother's cursing, "Gay!! Disgusting!!"

For the first time, he knew that this matter might be wrong.

After that, the divorce was at the insistence of his mother, who took him to another school and changed his name, saying that even hearing that surname made her feel sick.

It happened that his mother's surname was Yan, so he changed his name to Yan Dong.

Midsummer, severe winter.

When that summer was completely over, he also entered a chaotic winter.

His mother's temperament changed drastically, and she was very hysterical during that period of time, and she treated him even more severely. Before he could move out urgently, Qin Haoming came to him. Through the security door, his mother found out that it was a boy, so she asked him who he was , What is the relationship, why did you come to him.

That was the first time he lied, and in his later life, for the same reason, he lied countless times.

He said: A student, come to get the key to the physical education classroom.

He was afraid that his mother would find out that he was also gay, and he couldn't stand his mother's questioning and sensitive eyes. He began to believe that this matter was "wrong", and began to think: homosexuality is wrong.

So I made up my mind and pressed it in my heart, and swore to myself: I will not let others know in this life.

He tried to "correct" himself, and quietly searched for those "treatment plans" on the Internet: every time he wanted to find Qin Haoming, he would quietly prick the inside of his arm with a compasses.

He told Qin Haoming that something happened at home and he couldn't leave for the time being, and he would look for him tomorrow.

At that time, he thought: I am hopeless, but you still have time.

There is time to correct this "wrong thing" and to be a "normal person" in time.

He was supposed to take the college entrance examination that year, but because of the rapid drop in his grades after transferring to another school, the pressure of studying, and the sudden crazily longing, he couldn't sleep almost all night, and woke up almost every night, lying on the toilet. Beside vomiting until stomach convulsions

During that nearly a year, the only day he slept well was on the day of the college entrance examination in the examination room, sleeping in the dark.

Later, of course, I had to repeat it for a year.

In fact, he is very grateful for the year he repeated his studies, which allowed him to break free from the pressure of the college entrance examination, and also calmed down his almost neurotic mother at that time, and she stopped whispering in his ears how disgusting homosexuality was.

On the day when the results were released, his mother hugged his head and said sorry.

She thought that the reason why Yan Dong failed the college entrance examination was because of the pressure her nervousness brought to him.

Yan Dong couldn't explain it, and it was far more than this reason.

But at least in terms of results, it has indeed effectively alleviated the severe winter conditions.

It was also the year of re-reading that he realized one thing with the help of Mr. Lin and his cousin.

The father's fault wasn't that he was "gay."

It's that he is obviously gay, but he still takes advantage of his mother's love and betrays his marriage.

He is also "gay"

It wasn't his fault either.

This is not wrong at all.

He didn't try to contact Qin Haoming, but just quietly asked his classmates in the past. The classmates said that his little follower was very good, and he should have been admitted to this school. He came to ask him when the school started that year, but he never came again.

The classmate's thinking is very big: You are asking the right question, and I know that the year he came up, our class all graduated, and I was the only one who waited for them for another year, hahahahahaha, I heard it was very good, you After he left, he didn't come to the sports team very much. This year's college entrance examination should be. I saw his banner hanging in the school. I forgot whether he was in B or Q.Anyway, it’s pretty good, he inherited your mantle. I was inserted in the lower class at that time, and many school girls liked him.Why did you remember to ask him?You didn't tell him about your transfer. We thought you two had a falling out.

He was already very good at disguising at that time, and he laughed heartlessly: Oh, I just suddenly thought of asking, and even had a falling out, can I argue with a brat?

He tried to lie to himself: You see, without you, he will be fine, fine.

He doesn't have to face these things and be a "normal person" who is safe and secure.

And now, this "little boy", sitting in front of him, asked him what did I do wrong?

But he couldn't continue to lie, because of his cowardice, he hurt him on his own initiative.

Before he could finish his apology, he was interrupted by Qin Haoming.

"Brother, what are you talking about? I was the one who wanted to like you back then. What does it have to do with you?"

Qin Haoming leaned over completely, put his chin on his knee and leaned against him.

"I'm an adult now. Everything I do is on my own mind. But I still like you and never stop, whether it was the first time I saw you or the day I saw you at the bar your time."

"Yan Dong, I like you, I don't want to be your colleague, I want to be your boyfriend, I want to be with you"

"..."

"Brother" he put his entire profile on Yan Dong's lap,

"I miss you so much."