I just want you to be well

I woke up to the sound of music in my headphones.I gently rubbed my tired eyes, yawned, and closed the window card curiously.There are white clouds outside, against the backdrop of the blue sky, it looks like a fairyland like the valley of the wind in the animation.I quietly looked at the ant-sized buildings on the ground, as if I was in a miniature city maze.

Before I knew it, it had been four years, and the moment the plane landed, I was not excited about returning to my hometown.I took a taxi to Wei Jun's house, and the memories that had been locked away were gradually awakened in the familiar environment that came into view.

Along the way, scenes of following Wei Jun back home flashed in his eyes.My aunt was sitting in the co-pilot and my uncle in the back seat was nagging about our going home, while I leaned on Wei Jun's shoulder and looked out at the haze outside the window.The sky at that time was frighteningly gray.I can't forget the way the taxi driver looked at us from the rearview mirror, an embarrassment that I wanted to avoid but couldn't help peeking at.As for Wei Jun, he was looking out the window all the way, as if he was preoccupied.It's just that the temperature of his hand that I held tightly at that time was still constant.

Maybe I was too obsessed with thinking, and I didn't realize it until the driver called me three times, and I arrived at Wei Jun's house.I dragged my big luggage to my uncle and aunt's house.

"Uncle, aunt, long time no see."

"Yeah, come on, come on in."

My aunt enthusiastically dragged my suitcase in, and hurriedly got a cup of tea.Uncle came out of Wei Jun's room with Xiao Wei in his arms.

The moment I saw them, neither of them seemed to have changed, but their smiles were much more gentle than those of four years ago.On the contrary, it is Xiao Wei, who has not only grown up, but also gained weight, and seems to enjoy hiding in his uncle's arms.

After a few simple greetings, the aunt asked curiously, "Since the day after the cremation, you left in a hurry and never saw you again. Where have you been for the past four years?"

I just smiled slightly, "I'm back to Shanghai. After two years in my father's company, I went to study in the UK." head.

"I went to study in England. It's great. No wonder I haven't heard from you," said my aunt with relief.

"Well," my eyes were still a little evasive, "I just want to live in a different environment. At that time, I thought, why don't I just go to study for a master's degree."

Uncle joked, "What major did you study in England?"

"Creative writing", looking at their puzzled expressions, I immediately explained, "It means writing poems, making up stories, and writing novels."

Uncle and aunt nodded knowingly.

"I heard Wei Jun mention that you like to write," recalled the uncle.

I smiled and nodded, "Well... time flies so fast, it's been four years before you know it. How about you? How are you doing?"

The aunt pretended to be optimistic and said, "It's okay. Life has to go on."

The uncle glanced at the aunt, "Aren't you very busy? You always go to that gay center to be a volunteer."

I asked curiously, "A volunteer at the Gay Center?"

The aunt smiled modestly, "That's it. I only went to help out on weekends when I was free, and answered some parents' doubts."

Uncle said cheerfully, "It's more than that, you have become a living sign."

"Auntie", I am sincerely happy for her, "Thank you."

The aunt's expression was a little puzzled, "Why did you thank me all of a sudden?"

I shook my head, "No...thank you for standing up for us."

The aunt bowed her head and smiled, "It's actually not a big deal. If I can help other families, I think I'm accumulating blessings."

I looked at them with relief, and everyone seemed to be moving forward on the right track of life.It seems that everything is going well.I stared at Xiaowei and suddenly wanted to hug it.

"Uncle, can I hug Xiaowei?"

The uncle smiled, "I hope it still remembers you, you haven't seen each other for a long time."

Uncle handed Xiaowei to me.At the beginning, I was a little afraid that Xiaowei would not remember who I was, would be afraid of strangers, and would not be hugged by me.Perhaps because it is naturally docile, it is also quiet like a scholar in my arms, just lazily lying in my arms, scratching its ears from time to time.

"Xiaowei, long time no see." I kissed its forehead, its warm body pressed against my heart, and I couldn't help but miss the long-lost touch.

"Xiao Le", the aunt asked, "Do you want to go to the garden to meet Wei Jun?"

I knew I couldn't hide it from my aunt, so I could only nod obediently, "Is everything alright with Wei Jun over there?"

The aunt reluctantly raised the corners of her mouth, "Well, everything is fine...all is fine."

"Do you see him often?"

"Once every two months, I'll go over and buy him flowers, change them, and clean the box."

I nodded with a knowing smile.

"I'll take you there later to have a look."

My aunt and I bought two bouquets of flowers that can be used to place the ashes wall at the flower shop, and went to the garden where Wei Jun had been buried for a long time.The flower beds are covered with green leaves and yellow flowers, and each columbarium is extraordinarily vibrant amidst the flowers, adding vitality to the already heavy atmosphere in spring.

My aunt skillfully tidied up the old flowers around the wooden box.And I carefully unpacked the new bouquets of flowers and placed them around the grid.After it was over, I could finally face Wei Jun's urn carefully and quietly.

After four years, I met him again.Only this time, I was separated from him by yin and yang.

I know in my heart that the person I loved deeply will always be engraved in my memory.Even though I can no longer hear his voice, see his smile and face, whenever I think of him, it seems that he is alive, and my heart will beat for him again.This feeling can never be changed.

My eyes turned red again.Over the past four years, I have kept many, many things in my heart, and I have always wanted to say them to him face to face.Even though he can no longer hear and respond to me, I still want to talk to him.I just want him to know that I've been thinking about him.

I reached over and touched his urn anyway, something I didn't have the courage to do four years ago.I want to use his urn to recall the residual warmth he left on me at that time.Maybe it's been too long, or maybe I deliberately want to forget, I can't seem to recall the tenderness, temperature, and touch when Wei Jun touched me.

All of these seem to disappear with the passage of time.Only the wound that was about to heal will always be torn again the moment he thinks of him, and then it will take a long time to heal in a small area.

My aunt walked out of the garden before me, and I followed behind slowly.

The weather in Beijing today is a blessing.The afterglow of the setting sun poured through the thick clouds and mist in the garden, and Wei Jun's urn was illuminated transparently and delicately red.I let out a breath, and inadvertently looked towards the step slope far away in the forest. Under the refraction of the light, I seemed to see Wei Jun again.

He is still as tall, sunny, and handsome as the first time we met.He seemed to be waving at me, with a happy smile that he hadn't seen for a long time, and his slightly parted lips seemed to be talking to me.

Dear Wei Jun, is this really you?Do you know how much I miss your smile, your call to me?

I waved my hand excitedly to the distance, and I couldn't help shouting out the "how are you" that I had been holding back in my heart.

He put his hands on his mouth, as if responding forcefully, "I'm fine! How are you?"

"I'm very good!"

I also tried my best to shout out my thoughts on him.

Xiaguang gently wiped away the tears from the corners of my eyes, and I smiled in front of him as if letting go.Finally, I don't have to pretend to be strong and laugh.I seem to be able to see the tears in the corners of his eyes, just like mine, full of long-lost longings and unforgettable love.

The shadow of the setting sun left by the sunset is slowly disappearing between the gaps in the forest road.

He waved vigorously at me again.I know that he is really going to leave this time.Dismay was written on his face.I reluctantly waved to him vigorously, tears streaming down my face non-stop.

I know that this time, we will never see each other again.

He gradually blurred, blurred, and blurred in my vision.

Finally, it disappeared into the horizon with the dusk.

I held back the remaining tears, wiped my crying face with a tissue, and slowly turned to the direction of the exit, only to see my aunt was already waiting for me outside the garden gate.

I once again looked reluctantly at the Ti Linjian where afterimages appeared.

He is long gone.

Yes, Wei Jun is long gone.

I raised my head, exhaled deeply, and smiled in relief.

I turned my head and took advantage of the last rays of the setting sun, and embarked on the return journey back to the entrance of life.