My general

I don’t know which company’s Tai Sui was wronged in today’s performance. There have been accidents from the beginning, and it’s finally coming to an end. The prop master actually said that the last male protagonist’s wedding can’t be performed because the props are broken.

"What do you mean 'the props are broken'?" At this time, the stage director was already in a state of confusion, unable to understand why today's performance was against her everywhere, "We have prepared props for half a year, just for this scene, the premiere Is it broken?"

The door of the box opened suddenly, and the colonel was taken aback. He thought it was Dr. Tian who came back, but it was a complete stranger who came in.The visitors dressed in caps, cheap T-shirts, ripped jeans and hip-hop shoes, all of which were incompatible with the luxurious Denlo Theater and the audience in full dresses. The orange vest on the outermost coat was printed with "Danlo Theater "The words should be background staff.

Six screens are displayed in front of the stage director at the same time, connecting all aspects of the stage performance.At this time, she was busy looking at the screen, and she didn't realize that she was in the wrong place. She only knew that the performance could not be interrupted. When she looked up and didn't see the stage, she directly opened the curtain of the waiting room at the front, looked at the stage, and soon Figured out a countermeasure and quickly contacted the set designer.

As soon as the intercom screen was connected, the set designer saw the stage director running into the first-class box, and a colonel behind him looked at her in astonishment: "Sister Onizuka..."

"Does what you're going to say have anything to do with acting?"

"It has nothing to do with acting, but..."

"It has nothing to do with the performance, let's talk about it later." The stage director ordered domineeringly.

Several staff members looked at each other through the intercom video. In the end, the costume designer took advantage of the stage director's inattention and wrote the word "Sorry" on a piece of paper and held it up to the colonel.

The colonel nodded, thinking that Danlu is really high-end, and buying a first-class box can not only watch the show, but also watch behind-the-scenes highlights.But fortunately, Dr. Tian is not here, otherwise, it would be embarrassing if the stage director suddenly barged in.

The stage director pointed the picture frame with his fingers to the stage set: "Ajie, is the set for the last performance of "Ten Miles of Red Makeup" still there? Someone commented on the Internet that it looked like a ghost bride getting married."

"Can this get over it?" The set designer has been laughed at for over a year.

"It's time for you to wash away your shame." The stage director put down his hands, "Since it looks like a ghost bride, then just act like a ghost bride. Don't use the upper and lower stages for the last scene, the background of the 'ghost bride getting married', the heroine stage front solo.”

"The scenery and the background vocals are in Ningbo dialect, so it's too late to deal with it in such a short time." The sound effects artist interjected, "And the style of the background music and the finale song are too different. Create a 'ghost bride getting married' atmosphere."

"Can you stop mentioning 'Ghost Bride'?" The set designer almost buried his head under the table.

The stage director bit his lower lip until it bled, and contacted the universal understudy: "Dad, can you still dance now?"

On the other end of the walkie-talkie came the laughter of the almighty stand-in: "Dad is not that old. Which part to dance to? When to dance?"

"That's it." The stage director knew what to do, "I'm sorry, Yunyi, the last song will not be sung, and the heroine uses dance to express death."

"This is an opera, not a musical!" the choreographer reminded, "How can there be an opera where the lead actor dances instead of singing?"

"I bet you a penny, none of these idiots sitting in the audience can tell the difference between an opera and a musical." The stage director even suspected that some of them looked at the stage seriously.

There is a "stupid" sitting behind her.The choreographer looked at the colonel with some embarrassment.

The colonel pulled up the portal screen behind the stage director to show the choreographer, and it said "You just won a penny" on it.

The choreographer couldn't laugh or cry.

The stage director finally ordered: "The last scene, the set of "Ten Miles of Red Makeup", the heroine dancing solo in front of the stage, "Snow Dance"."

Staff from various departments took orders and left.

On stage, the hero's selfishness finally overcomes his love for the heroine, abandons her and her womb, and marries his boss' daughter.The heroine's father couldn't bear his daughter being abandoned by the hero all the time, so he mustered up the courage to go to the Korean camp to find the hero, hoping to get justice for his daughter.In order to hide his past with the heroine from his boss and bride, the hero connived at his subordinates and beat the heroine's father to death against his conscience, and then threw the body back to the heroine's home, indicating that he has nothing to do with the heroine ever since.

In the last scene, on the all-black background, the red figure like a shadow puppetry carried the dowry, and kept shouting "Hey, hey, yo". The five floors were densely packed, accompanied by the lively music of the trumpet and suona. The grand and lively wedding is like Appears in the heroine's nightmare.In front of the stage, snowflakes are falling from the sky. The heroine in white is holding out her belly that is about to give birth, caressing the corpse of her old father who depends on each other. The dying dance is heartbreaking. It is completely impossible to see that the dancer on the stage is not a young girl at all. A woman, but an older man.

After confirming that there will be no more moths on the stage for the time being, the stage director has the heart to continue to ask the prop master Xingshi: "Why is the prop broken?"

"Look for yourself." The prop master turned the camera.

The colonel saw the backstage on the stage director's portal screen, the Master Chief fled in a panic in front, and Doctor Tian chased him behind with a knife, and sat up straight.

The stage director frowned and thought for a while, his fingers fluttered on the portal screen, and the surveillance camera was called up, a blank wall appeared on the screen, and the knife holder on the wall was empty: "It doesn't matter, she is holding the 'Muramasa' in the lounge. , just a decoration, unsharpened..."

As soon as the words fell, there was the sound of something breaking in the video.

"...Is it?" The stage director was not sure.

At the beginning, the colonel sat down again when he heard that the knife was not sharpened. Then he heard that the stage director was not sure whether the knife was sharpened.

"Did you see it? It's not my fault that the props were damaged." The prop master reappeared on the screen, "Your father brought that man into the backstage at first, and he was probably hunted down when he thought women wouldn't dare to chase him. When we got to the backstage, we fled in again, unexpectedly that woman also chased me in."

"But don't tell me, this is a master of mirror, mind and wisdom." The stage director signaled the props master not to block the screen, and stared straight at Dr. Tian, ​​"Wearing twelve singles, the movements can still be so smooth and graceful. "

"Don't patronize watching." The prop master didn't know how to complain about this play idiot, "The performance is almost over, the props are broken, and it's a big deal to do it again. But if they run around like this again, if they go to the stage, the show will be destroyed. It won't work out."

"First find a way to hold them back, don't let them run to the stage, as long as it can be delayed." The stage director called the original author of the opera: "A Fei, something happened backstage."

"I know you can handle it." The other end of the phone was the shopkeeper as always.

"That's right." The stage director narrowed his eyes dangerously, and the weird smile of excitement made all the staff of various departments on the screen in front of her shudder, "Ajie, prepare for the flame effect of "Hell Change". Aunt Dou, Let the ensemble performers who play the Goryeo army not rush away. Add another scene at the end—after the heroine dies, she turns into a ghost and burns the Goryeo camp on fire at the heroine’s wedding!"

"You don't want the cut guy in the backstage to play the leading role?" the lighting engineer interjected, "He's wearing the uniform of the Imperial Army, which is too different from the Koryo Army."

"It's okay." The petite lighting engineer spoke with a baby voice, but he was more courageous than the tall lighting engineer, "I can lock his movements and change the color of his clothes by following the light without looking carefully. Can't find it."

"Come on, stop bragging." The lighting engineer didn't believe it at all, "You have this ability?"

"It's you and not me who are incompetent!" The light chaser insisted.

"Yao Yao, stop talking nonsense with Daniel." The stage director interrupted the bickering between the two, "You can do it if you can, and beat him if he pushes you."

From the other end of the walkie-talkie came the yelling of the light chaser, followed by the muffled groan of the lighting engineer.

"Uh..." The stage director didn't expect the light chaser to be so strong in execution, "Yao Yao, I'm just talking, I didn't make you really beat me up."

"It's too late!" The light chaser kicked away the gaffer who was curled up in a ball clutching his trousers, rolled up his sleeves, like a wind-up doll, "It's okay, sister Onitsuka, with the instrument, I can also be a big bull I will fire him later, his salary will belong to me, and I can handle the stage lighting effects by myself.”

At the end of the song, the heroine pulled out the sword, inserted it deeply into the pregnant belly, and fell to the ground.The red lights gradually spread from under the heroine like blood, and the set ignited a raging fire, burning out the procession of seeing off relatives like a shadow puppet show.

Before the stage director could heave a sigh of relief, the almighty substitute's painful voice came from the intercom: "Miracle, I seem to have twisted my waist just now."

What time is it, why hasn't Yao Mozi finished?The stage director wanted to cry: "It doesn't matter if you want it!"

"It's not a big deal, it's just that I can't move." Not to mention the stage director, the all-purpose stand-in wanted to cry, "Miracle, Dad is old, and he can't help you even if he wants to. How do we act next?"

The stage director pondered for a moment: "Yao Yao, as long as you can lock the action, can you modify the costume effect and project it on the stage at will? Even if the performer is not on the stage."

"Yes!" The light chaser was full of confidence, "As long as it is a solid color background."

"Okay, after the fire is over, all the lights will be black, and I will be projected onto the stage." The stage director looked at it, pulled up the curtain of the box as the background, roughly smoothed out his short messy hair, and put on the peaked cap to suppress everything, and took off The vest was huddled in a ball and hugged in his arms, "My costume was changed to Bai Wugou, and the vest was changed to swaddling clothes, all with a transparency of [-], rising from the heroine's body, and slowly projecting to the middle of the second floor of the stage. Yun I mean, one more song."

"Sing what?" The second substitute hurriedly went to turn over the sheet music.

"Don't look through it, it's not on the sheet music. The last song is "Cage Girl"."

"Deaf girl?" The second understudy didn't understand, "A deaf woman?"

"Forget it, I'm sorry you don't understand Japanese either. I'll do it myself." The stage director cleared his throat, "Ozawa, put my voice on stage later, ethereal sound effect."

"Little case." The sound effects engineer took the lead.

"Old Liu, take my dad down when the lights are dark, and change the first floor to a wedding banquet in the Korean camp."

"Hey, okay." The field worker took the order.

"Aunt Dou, after the two guys backstage come on stage, direct the group to withdraw."

"Got it." The choreographer took the order.

The light chaser is also ready: "It's done! Sister Onizuka, I'll see you next."

The stage director imitated the appearance of a universal stand-in lying on the stage, lying on the floor of the box, took a deep breath, and then slowly exhaled: "Dad, do me a favor, help me brew a relationship."

"How to help?"

"Imagine if I was kidnapped by the Imperial Army, what would happen to you?"

There is an officer of the Imperial Army sitting behind you!The staff of all departments have a look of horror.

Only the almighty understudy didn't realize that the stage director was pointing at the monk and scolding the bald thief: "Of course I'm going to save you. Don't worry, dad is definitely smarter than the heroine's dad. Even if he can't beat them, he will go there with zha medicine. If you want to die, everyone will die together."

"Aren't you afraid they will search you?"

"The bullets are hidden in the gang gate, and they can't find them." The almighty substitute was triumphant, "Isn't Dad very smart?"

The colonel felt chills when he heard it from the sidelines. He had never been so glad that the [-]th regiment was a group of gay men. Even if the stage director's assumption came true, the all-purpose substitute would go to bomb the [-]th regiment next door.

The stage director sighed heavily: "Dad, it's great to be your daughter."

"What are you talking about?" The laughter of the almighty stand-in came from the other end of the intercom, "You are a miracle in Dad's life. Miracle, do you know? When Dad was diagnosed by a doctor..."

The stage director hastily hung up the walkie-talkie, lest he would make himself laugh if he continued talking.

The colonel sat quietly at the side, seeing the stage director trembling with grief, he was hesitating whether to say something to comfort her, the stage director slowly got up, and the sadness that enveloped her became like something Substantial darkness emanated from her continuously.

The colonel found himself paralyzed by the dark aura surrounding her.

The stage darkened suddenly, a white figure holding a child floated up from the heroine, rose slowly, and floated in mid-air. The huge hat covered the upper half of the face, revealing only the pointed chin and blood-red lips .

"かごめ, かごめ..." An ethereal female voice came from the stage. It was clearly a nursery rhyme sung by children playing games, but it carried a creepy feeling.

The colonel turned his head and found that it was indeed the stage director who was singing. The choked baby voice and the neutral voice when speaking normally seemed to have two voices.

The stage director has already fully entered the play, with a sinister air in every gesture: "かごの中の鸟は, いついつでやる, Ye Ming けの晩に, Crane と亀が拍った, Houろのfront だあれ?"

The nursery rhymes gradually faded, and the lights on the stage gradually turned on, illuminating the lively wedding banquet in Gaoli Camp, and a man's scream suddenly burst out from the stereo.

Where the white figure in mid-air disappeared, the Master Chief rushed onto the stage. Before he could realize why so many people appeared in front of him, Dr. Tian had already copied Muramasa and killed him.

The stage director finally had time to take a breath, put on the vest that was wrinkled like a rag again, grabbed the railing of the box, and propped himself up section by section, making sure that the group performers were safely evacuated, and then he was in the mood to appreciate Dr. Ueda on stage Chasing and killing the Master Chief: "This girl has a face, she is not from the industry, but she has a strong sense of stage. What does she do?"

"It's a doctor." The colonel found himself moving at last.

"Hey, doctor?" The stage director thought it was some new worker who was answering, "It's better than a regular actor to steal the show."

"It is indeed more versatile than ordinary people. After all, she is a lady of the Otawara family."

The staff of the theater called the stage director "Sister Onizuka", and it sounds like she should also be Japanese-Chinese.The colonel thought that the stage director would show favoritism to Dr. Tian, ​​who is also Japanese-Chinese, for example, thinking about how this show would end on the stage, but she sneered: "So it's from the Otahara family."

"She is Japanese-Chinese..." Isn't the stage director?The colonel began to wonder if his memory was wrong. Perhaps "Onitsuka" was the surname of a minority in China, not Japanese-Chinese.

"Only Otawara is still a 'Chinese of Japanese descent'!" The stage director snorted, "Except for not having a honor, what is the difference between Otawara and those Shangguan/Li family? Why is the surname 'Otawara'? Just like the 'Japanese' in the Shangguan Dynasty. Wouldn’t it be better for volunteers to use Chinese names? Being a ‘Japanese traitor’ might be less discriminating than being a ‘second-class citizen’ like us.”

It was the first time that the colonel knew that there were so many differences between Japanese-Chinese, and by the way, he suspected that Tuanzhang Ma was the "Japanese traitor" in the words of the stage director.

"Which one of the Ohtahara family is that guy on the stage?"

"Otawara Lumina Medical Junior Superintendent." The colonel answered truthfully.

Unexpectedly, the stage director let out a "sigh", and then laughed and fell on the railing of the box: "Which naughty guy named her? The one with the surname 'Otawara' actually named it 'Lumina', could she still be a A neurologist?"

"Surgery." The colonel didn't understand what was so funny about Dr. Tian's name, "Is there something wrong with this name?"

The stage director managed to stop laughing: "Before the human genetic modification project, there was a kind of epilepsy named after the discoverer, called 'Otawara Syndrome'."

"Oh." As far as the Colonel knew, many diseases were named after their discoverers, such as Alzheimer's disease, Parkinson's, etc. "Otawara Syndrome" didn't sound wrong.

"Rumina is ruminal, that is, phenbabital, an ancient anti-epileptic sedative." The stage director began to laugh like a convulsion again, "The last name is epilepsy, and the first name is a sedative, but such a violent person Temper. Who named her? So talented."

The colonel never thought that Dr. Tian's name was so particular, let alone that an actor would understand it: "You know a lot."

"It's like this in our business. The knowledge may not be very deep, but it must be very broad. You have to learn everything, even if you only learn a little." The stage director lay on the railing of the box, wiping away tears from laughter, "But I will know the stalk of 'Otawara Lumina', it is purely a blind cat meeting a dead mouse-I personally like history and medicine, after all, many historical events are more bloody than novels, and medicine can save people Technology can also be the art of killing."

The colonel swallowed.

"I don't know if the person who named this Ms. Epilepsy Tranquilizer is still alive." The more the stage director thought about it, the more he felt amused, "'Otawara, would you like some lumina?' The person who named it was a stroke of genius."

The colonel took a look at Dr. Tian chasing after the Master Chief on the stage, and couldn't help wondering how many people who laughed at Dr. Tian's name face to face could survive.

"But no one will laugh at her name now." The stage director finally recovered, took off his peaked cap, and scratched his sweaty hair, "Since the human genetic modification project, many diseases have become history, and I don't know It is estimated that many people who really study medicine don’t know about the fact that luminal is still used in the current hospital. It’s so lonely when you name someone else, but no one finds out in the end.”

The colonel decided not to continue discussing this topic, lest he couldn't help but joke about her name in front of Dr. Tian in the future, and then he didn't even know how he died: "What's the meaning of that song just now? "

"It's a Japanese nursery rhyme, like "Throwing the Handkerchief", which is sung by children when they are playing games. The lyrics are translated into Chinese, roughly speaking, 'Cage girl, cage girl, bird in the cage, when will it fly out, it will be dawn soon In the middle of the night, the crane and the tortoise fell down, who is that person behind?' During the game, a child was blindfolded and played a ghost in the middle, and a group of children held hands and sang around the middle child. The children in the school have to guess who the child standing behind is, if they can’t guess correctly, they will continue to pretend to be ghosts;

"Very cute." The colonel couldn't help thinking of his childhood.

"Don't you think the rules of the game are very similar to looking for a scapegoat?"

The colonel shuddered suddenly.

"'Cage girl' refers to a pregnant woman. The fetus is locked in the mother's belly and is ready to move, just like a bird in a cage trying to fly out. It is almost dawn, and the child is about to be born, but the tortoise and the crane, which symbolize longevity, 'fall' , means miscarriage. The child who dies before birth becomes Shui Ziling, who clings to the back of his relatives until he becomes a Buddha." The stage director let out a creepy laugh, "How is it? Is it better than "Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes "Is it more scary?"

The Colonel already had goosebumps all over his body.

"I chose to sing "Cage Girl" for this reason—for a long time after human beings entered the patriarchal society, women were like playthings locked in cages, without freedom and dignity. The male protagonist also treats the female protagonist as a plaything, and the female protagonist dies with hatred, becoming the lingering ghost behind the male protagonist, chasing and killing her persecutors to hell."

"So dress her in white?"

"Shiro Mugo is the wedding dress of Japanese brides."

What a ghost bride. "So white clothes mean pure and flawless?" The colonel did not expect that the wedding customs in Japan are closer to distant Europe than to China, which is close by.

"No, it's a shroud. I wish that the married daughter will never come back like a dead person who passed away."

"Wishing" a married daughter as if she was dead?This is called "blessing"? "Are you talking about Japanese customs, or the Hou Dynasty?" The colonel remembered reading in history books that women in the Hou Dynasty wore shrouds to marry and married their daughters as funerals. The dead are buried in peace.Weddings in the upper class are more particular. The bride’s father will hand over to the groom the one who beat his daughter with a stick at the wedding ceremony, which means that from now on, beating the bride becomes the groom’s right and obligation, while the lower class will directly "dirty" at the wedding. ".Su Langhuan was frightened by such "marriage customs" back then and went into exile overseas until the fall of the Hou Dynasty. Because of the psychological shadow left by her youth, she never got close to anyone, no matter male or female.不过厚朝的其他女性大多比苏琅嬛幸运——上官军一群光棍打过来，看不惯厚朝男人打女人，直接拔拳相助，于是新娘因为新郎暴揍自己的父亲兄弟而爱上新郎、 Shangguanjun's bridegroom and best man violently beat the male relatives of Houchao's bride's natal family at the wedding, which became one of the strange scenes at that time.

"The Shangguan Dynasty only regards the bride as a dead person, but the Japanese custom treats the bride as a ghost. The white hat is called '角隠し', because the ancient Japanese believed that women's long hair had a spirit body, and they were afraid that 'women would go crazy because of jealousy, with long hair on their heads. Horns become ghosts', so cover the bride's hair with a hat." The stage director laughed nervously, "In ancient Japan, women wore shrouds and were married as evil spirits, so let the bride wearing shrouds incarnate at the wedding and die How about the idea?"

She didn't tell him that the colonel thought that the exaggeratedly large hat was just to hide the stage director's boyish short hair.

"However, the only one who can detect my intentions is probably the Miss Otawara who cut people on the stage—if she can pay more attention to watching the show instead of killing people." The stage director leaned on the railing of the box, Dr. Tian Tian chased the Master Chief with a knife, and gave a weak dry smile, "Every time the show is over, I will go to the theater's website to read every audience comment, no matter whether it is good or bad, if there are new comments, I will compare them with the comments I got. I’m happy with the ticket commission. It’s a pity that Danlu put it bluntly, it’s just a social occasion for officials. I worked hard to direct the rehearsal and spent all my efforts to smooth things over, but in the end I played the piano to a group of arty cows. Sometimes I would rather someone evade the fare to come in Watch the show well, and don’t want to meet the guy who paid a lot of money to buy a first-class cabin, but pulls the curtain all the way.” The stage director glanced at the auditorium, and finally realized that the angle of view was wrong, bit by bit like a rusty robot. Turning his head, he finally realized that he was in the first-class box, and there was a man in the uniform of the Imperial Army sitting in a chair in front of him, with many stars on his shoulders, a medal on his chest, and a saber on his waist.

The stage director was stunned for a long time before he found his tongue: "This... is this the first class?"

The colonel nodded.

"How long have I been in?"

"It wasn't long. When you came in, the heroine wasn't a ghost yet." The colonel propped his chin up with one hand and gave her a bright smile, "You're right, it's really stupid to buy a first-class car and not go to the theater. Fortunately, there are also behind-the-scenes explanations and tidbits at the end, which are fully worth the ticket price."

The stage director forcefully squeezed out a dry smile: "Master Jun, it's fun to eat." After speaking, he wanted to slip away.

The colonel stretched out his hand and grabbed the stage director's arm: "Are you going to take the stage later?"

"It's up to the director and the actors to take the curtain call." The stage director just smiled wryly. Facing the colonel's rude behavior, he didn't even mean to struggle at all, "I'm the stage director, and I'm the worker behind the scenes. Applause, no one will know who I am; when I need to go on stage, it will only be when the performance accident is irreparable and I have to refund the ticket."

"Really? It's a pity, everyone was so happy watching." Seeing that the stage director didn't respond to his teasing, and the colonel was not interested in teasing her anymore, he obediently let go, "The show hasn't officially ended yet, so just stand up like this Excited cheering, is it a custom in Shuizhou? I just came here not long ago, so I don’t know much about it.” The empire has a vast territory, with different winds and customs for ten miles, and a set of holiday regulations for each place, ranging from the entire empire to as small as one. Counties have different statutory holidays.The colonel is new here, so he really has to study how to do as the Romans do.

"What?" The stage director turned his head and scanned the auditorium, and found a group of well-dressed dignitaries dancing and laughing on the seats, as if they had entered a mental hospital, "What's going on here?"

On the stage, the Master Chief was busy running for his life, when Doctor Tian suddenly shouted from behind: "What are you running for?! This knife is not sharp!"

The Master Chief turned his head and saw Dr. Tian standing in the middle of the stage with a knife in his hand. The dazzling stage lights illuminated her red twelve singles like a burning fire.

"Damn it!" Dr. Tian looked around the auditorium, and suddenly threw the knife in his hand on the ground, "Since you bunch of fags came, I haven't had a day to rest peacefully."

Didn't you say it was not sharpened?The Master Chief sat down on the ground, staring at Muramasa who was swaying between his legs, his scalp felt numb for a while.

The colonel and the stage director were still in the box without knowing it, until Dr. Tian called: "Immediately block the entire theater. Terrorist attack!"

The author has something to say:

I'm also like the stage director, I don't expect you to pay, I just want to read your comments_(:з」∠)_