Tomie's Son Dazai[Comprehensive]

It was still raining outside, as if it would never stop, and the wind blew in with moisture, which made people tremble all over.

Both Masako and Osamu Dazai sat on the cushions.

Face to face, each holding a teacup, under the premise that the teacup is filled with hot water.

The black cat kept rubbing against Osamu Dazai, its amber eyes glowed in the dark night, Osamu Dazai pushed the black cat, seeing that the black cat still refused to leave, he simply ignored it, He turned his gaze back to Masako.

They had just come to the main room from Masako's bedroom, and the room was dimly lit by candlelight.In such a drowsy environment, Osamu Dazai looked at Masako quietly.

"Then, Miss Masako."

"Let's begin our plan."

Osamu Dazai said in a gentle tone with a smile on his face. If you ignore what he said next, it might make people think that he is explaining his plan to go out to play tomorrow.

"What plan?" Masako asked calmly.

"planA, let's swallow the poison together."

"pianB, we killed each other with knives."

"planC, after burning charcoal, we will take sleeping pills and die together."

"Come on, choose."

The black-haired man stared at Masako quietly, his black eyes seemed to be gazing at his lover, making one unable to help but fall into it.

Masako was silent for a while, before she could make a choice, Osamu Dazai seemed to find it interesting, propped his head and said with a smile: "But after we die together, we are accomplices."

"Accomplice?" Masako still had thick dark circles under her eyes, and she looked haggard, very scary under the dim light.

"Killed each other's accomplices." Dazai Osamu said with a smile, and he was like those seductive monsters in neon legends.

Masako was in a daze for a moment, and said with a smile: "'Accomplice' is not used in this way. But this sentence really has a personal style, Dazai-kun."

Osamu Dazai blinked, the raindrops outside fell onto the wooden boards in the corridor, making a crisp sound in the silent night.

"What kind of person do you think I am?" Osamu Dazai asked curiously.

"What kind of person..." Masako pushed back the hair in front of her ears, and said, "Someone who is gentle and lonely."

"You are a person who made me feel lonely when I first saw it, as if there is only one person in the world, and you are incompatible with the whole world."

Osamu Dazai was silent for a while, and said, "What about Miss Masako? According to my feeling, it is because of this loneliness that Miss Masako wants to die."

"Life is born to be lonely." Masako lowered her head, her black hair was hanging down, and under her thick eyelashes, her black and white eyes were full of unknown emotions.

"But, before I met that person, I never knew what pain and loneliness are." Masako took a sip of hot water, as if her burning and aching stomach felt better because of it.

Her expression was very cold, as if the person who cried unpreparedly in the night just now was not her, and her tone was indifferent as if she was talking about someone who had nothing to do with her.

"Wouldn't it be better if we had never met before... You have thought about it." The black-haired man knelt on the cushion in front of her and said softly.

His voice is like the serpent among Adam and Eve, luring the sins in people's hearts.

Masako remained silent.

"I...don't know." Masako looked up to the outside of the paper door, the rain still hadn't stopped, the scenery outside the corridor was pitch black, there was a loud bang outside, and a lightning flashed.

The trees outside shook and made a "swish" sound.

Was it happier before we met?Or is it happier to lose after meeting?

"However, before I met that person, I never knew what happiness is and what happiness is." Masako evoked a stiff smile.

Osamu Dazai silently picked up the teacup in his hand, took a sip of hot water, and said, "However, it is precisely because you know what happiness is and what happiness is that you suffer because of it."

The two fell into a moment of silence.

"Speaking of which, I once read a book." Dazai Osamu rubbed the bottom of the teacup, and the black cat also came to rub against the back of his hand. Dazai Osamu reached out and stroked the black cat's head, and the black cat squinted comfortably. Eye.

"What is it?" Yako asked.

Dazai replied with a smile.

"The two people who agreed to commit suicide cut off each other one by one, and then swallowed them."

"Sounds like a good way to die." Masako commented calmly.

"Yes, but it should be painful." Osamu Dazai said distressedly. "Although I really want to die like this, I am still very afraid of pain."

"Like a child, Dazai-kun." Masako reached out her hand to cover the smile on her lips.

"I think this is a very normal thing, after all, I'm not a masochist." Osamu Dazai said in a joking tone.

"That's indeed the truth." Masako curled up the corners of her mouth, the dark circles under her eyes became more obvious, and her black eyes were amazingly bright in the night.

"No matter what kind of person you are, you will have something to fear."

Tuoren lay in the hospital for a long time before he died.

Near the time of his death, he had a bad time.Tuoren began to lose his hair, became irritable, and often said some annoying things.

But Masako knew it wasn't his fault, he was too scared.

Takuto, who had to face death at a young age, could not just spend his last days peacefully.

He was often in a daze, looking out the window in a trance, and the birds fluttering past outside the window made Tuoren feel envious.

He really wanted to go out and play in the last few days, but after thinking about his body and Masako, Takuto finally stayed.

But seeing Masako who took care of him so hard, Takuto felt deep torment and pain in his heart.

"It would have been nice if I hadn't met you back then, it wouldn't have caused you so much pain." Tuoren said painfully with tears in his eyes.

"Don't say such things, meeting you is already a happiness that I couldn't imagine in half my life." Masako comforted him softly, reaching out to caress his haggard face, looking gentle and beautiful, but her heart was not like that of.

How can you say that?

Masako still had a gentle smile on her face, but she was screaming in her heart.

Why deny our encounter? !

Why pull me out of the abyss and then push me down? !

The next day, Tuoren died.

What else did Takuto say before he died? Masako has already forgotten, and it is probably similar to what he said before.

Recalling what happened five years ago, Masako lowered her eyes and took another sip of hot water. The hot water was swallowed from her throat to her stomach, which calmed Masako's mood very well.

The rain outside became heavier, and the strong wind blew over the wooden poles outside. The black cat let out a shrill meow in fright, and wanted to crawl into Dazai Osamu's arms.

"Hey, don't climb on me." Osamu Dazai pinched the back of the black cat helplessly and put him back on the ground. The black cat rubbed his hand coquettishly.

Masako stared at the black cat for a while, and said, "Everyone says cats have nine lives."

"There is indeed such a saying." Osamu Dazai said while stroking the back of the black cat all the way to the tail.

"Then how many times has this cat died?" Masako said, looking at the docile-looking black cat.

Osamu Dazai was silent for a while, then touched the cat a few more times, and said, "I don't know, after all, I am not this cat."

"However, compared to the black cat, Ms. Masako, would you like to guess how many times I have died?" Osamu Dazai said, his eyes narrowed, and he smiled harmlessly.

However, probably because of the lightning and thunder outside, Masako felt as if she saw the shadow behind Osamu Dazai, with nine tails swaying non-stop like ghosts, like the legendary nine-tailed fox.

Masako's fingers trembled, she calmed down and said, "Dazai-kun is really a person with a strong heart."

"Why do you say that?" Dazai asked.

"Being able to pursue death calmly, and telling others to guess how many times you have died, must be a sign of inner strength."

"Is that so?" Osamu Dazai blinked, laughed as if remembering something, and said, "But my friend once said I was a coward."

"Coward, are you a coward who can face death calmly?"

"Pain may allow people to face it calmly, but "love" cannot." Osamu Dazai lowered his eyes, as if he was telling a very old story.

"Once, I thought, I can't wait for the second tomorrow." The smile on the corner of the black-haired man's mouth was very gentle under the light.

"It's been too long, I've waited too painfully." Osamu Dazai whispered softly in a sleepy tone.

"Humans are very fragile creatures. At the same time, the only person who can save himself is himself."

"However, there will always be people who are desperately trying to pull you up."

"If you don't really want to die, you can't help but hold that hand."

Dazai Osamu sighed.

"Even if you lose it, at least you were pulled up once."

Osamu Dazai raised his head, the originally empty eyes seemed to have broken through layers of thick ice, bursting out with scorching heat inside.

"The joys and sorrows of human beings are not the same. I can't empathize with you, let alone understand you."

"However, I can see that you don't really want to die, you are asking for help."

""help me"."

"You keep shouting."

""help me"."

Masako lowered her head.

"But—" Osamu Dazai's voice cooled down.

"In the final analysis, does Miss Masako love your husband?"

"Huh?" Masako uttered meaningless syllables in a daze, her pupils widened.

"I can't detect Miss Masako's love for your husband."

"What are you talking about? There is no doubt that I love that person." Masako shouted a little excitedly.

"Because he pulled you out of the abyss, because he loved you, because he brought you out of loneliness?"

The rain outside was getting heavier, and the tick-tock fell on the wooden boards, making a louder and louder sound.But Osamu Dazai's voice seemed to cover up the sound of rain in this room, resounding in Masako's ears like thunder.

Masako trembled.

Does she really love Tuoren?Or is it that she is just trapped in the vortex, dragging Tuo Ren into the abyss together but hoping that he can save herself.

bang.

The dark sky was illuminated by thunder, Dazai Osamu's face was divided into light and dark sides in the flash, his eyes pierced Masako's heart like sharp swords.

"It's not your husband you love."

"To shut up!"

"All you love is yourself who was pulled out of the abyss."

"Shut up!!"

"You love only yourself who is loved."

"I told you to shut up!!!"

Masako gasped for breath, trembling all over.

Osamu Dazai looked at her expressionlessly, with indifference and pity in his eyes.

"Your husband Tuo Ren has already noticed it, but even so he still loves you."

"Masako." Dazai Osamu sighed, stretched out his hand to caress Masako's cheek affectionately, and smoothed her messy black hair back a little.

"Love makes us weak, but it also makes us stronger."

"Don't pity yourself. If you feel sorry for yourself, your life will be a never-ending nightmare." Osamu Dazai looked serious, his black eyes staring quietly at Masako.

"It is not others that imprison you, but your own heart."

Masako's lips trembled, and the dark-haired man's face was reflected in her lifeless eyes.

"But I'm in so much pain, so much pain, so much pain. This pain can't be erased no matter what."

Osamu Dazai smiled, and he hugged Masako.

"Ah, me too. No matter what, it's so painful. I love this world, but I can't breathe. I really want to get out of this oxygen-free world."

"But, Masako. Think back, think back to the last words your husband said before he died."

What did Tuo Ren say before he died?

"...Live well?"

Before dying, the person who had struggled not to die, held Masako's hand standing in front of the hospital bed, and said softly with such gentle and tolerant eyes.

"No matter what, live on, Masako."

Why would you forget?

How can you forget?

It is obviously such an important word.

pat.

pat.

pat.

Tears slid down Masako's pale cheeks, she opened her tear-filled eyes, and said it as if trying to confirm her mood, screaming in her heart.

"I want to live."

Masako let out a choked sound, but she still looked at Osamu Dazai as if in a daze.

"I want to live."

She knelt down on the ground, looking at Osamu Dazai as if looking at a god, she put Osamu Dazai's hand on her head, and clasped her hands together, and said.

"I want to live."

Dazai sighed.

Why haven't you noticed it?The self who has been begging for help, also hopes to save her Takuto before he dies.

But only you can save yourself,

After saying her thoughts, Masako felt that the shackles in her heart were broken, and the exhaustion accumulated before suddenly hit her, and Masako fell down involuntarily.When she was gently placed on the tatami, Masako's blurred vision reflected the figure of the black-haired man.

how about you?What do you think?

Lonely and gentle person, how many times do you have to die, and how can you get your own answer.

Masako struggled to stretch out her hand and call out to Osamu Dazai, but in the end she couldn't resist the attack of darkness and fell into a deep sleep.

When Masako woke up again, the sun was shining in from outside, she opened her eyes in a daze, and stumbled out to look for the figure of the black-haired man.

But Osamu Dazai is gone, as if yesterday was just a good dream, and he needs to leave as Mr. Rabbit in Alice in Wonderland.

Masako sat on the ground a little melancholy.

"Meow~" Suddenly, Masako was awakened by a meow.

She turned her head, and the black cat was standing outside, looking at her from a distance.

"... cat?" Masako exclaimed in surprise.

The black cat came over and rubbed Masako's hand as if it knew it was calling him.

Masako touched the cat and couldn't help but smile.

"Speaking of which, that person really likes cats."

The cat looked at her quietly with its amber eyes open, and after Masako couldn't help but want to raise her, the other party walked out without looking back.

Masako was silent for a while, lowered her eyes, and couldn't help showing a peaceful smile.

"Separation is indeed a very painful thing. But meeting is also a very beautiful thing."

She raised her head and looked out at the sun.

"Well, come on, for the good things that might exist tomorrow."

"Sister Masako, are you awake? The reserved guests are coming soon, and the hot spring hotel is about to open!" A tree man shouted from outside.

"Here we come!" Masako shouted, got up and walked to the sunny outside.