disqualified hero

Miss Huizi lay on the old man's chest, weeping.

It was said to be the chest, but it was also covered with a layer of white cloth. The head of the man who had rolled away was picked up and placed next to the body. The servant woman covered the old man's body with a wide white cloth, giving him the last decency.

Looking at Miss Huizi's mourning appearance, and thinking of the similar lower half of their faces, no one would doubt their blood relationship.

[How could such a thing happen? ] She almost thought blankly, [Dad, why did Dad die suddenly? ]

She doesn't have a good relationship with Shanren, who is the name of a sociology teacher.He is definitely not a good father. He has a wife from a famous family, but he is still looking for flowers and women outside. In modern times, he is a person that women hate very much.Keiko is his illegitimate daughter. Since she was a child, she has watched her weak mother, who is not strong in personality, put on delicate makeup and wear a skirt made of silk and satin. She sits in the courtyard and looks at door.

Every time she thinks of her mother's thin, dodder-like figure that needs to be wrapped around to survive, her heart is filled with hatred.

——hate the flamboyant father, the humble mother who clings to men to survive, and the self who is supported.

She took the other party's money to go to school, took a job introduced by Shanren, hated this man, and had to live on his breath. In the end, she was still a blood-sucking bug just like her mother.

She didn't care much about this job. She said she was taking care of the young master, but she always came late and her words were very contemptuous, as if she could get revenge on him if she didn't do the job introduced by Shanren properly.

[But why, you suddenly died? ] The object of hatred for a long time suddenly disappeared, like a puppet with disconnected strings, and fell to the ground without a sound. When she saw Shanren whose body and head were separated, Keiko was at a loss. , Tears could not stop flowing down.

[Don't they all say that the disaster will last for thousands of years?Worse people live longer, and you should too, live another 20 years bastard, let me spit on your coffin when I'm gray. ] Her mind was full of messy thoughts, [And you like decent people so much, why do you want to die so badly, the incision between the head and the body is not even at all, the hair is messy and covered with plasma, it's too shameful! ]

[I haven't, I haven't told you yet, I hate you! ]

There are more and more people blocking the door, seeing the bloodstains all over the floor, but no one stops forward, none of them have the consciousness to protect the scene, everyone knows that the owner of the old mansion will not spread the dishonorable things to the outside world, the result is just " Private" two words.

"Let it go, let it go."

After a burst of brisk footsteps, Shuji Tsushima came.He was short in stature, squeezed among the crowd for a while, and finally he was able to see the whole room. The blood flowed out from the cut of his neck like a trickle, and flowed in all directions. Two strings of blood splashed on the sliding door of the closet. The surface of the delicate closet, painted with a misty view of Mt. Fuji, is stained.

"Young master, young master, I can't do it." A servant woman wanted to hold Shuji Tsushima, but he stared at him to death.

[What does it feel like? ]

The maid felt that she was being watched by a dangerous and poisonous snake. No, it was more terrifying than that. She did not dare to move, her internal organs were frozen, and she could not even sweat. A bucket of ice water poured over her head and face. on her.

She didn't dare to move, dare not speak, let alone step forward to hold Shuji Tsushima.

He pulled Keiko away and lifted the white cloth, revealing the hideous appearance of the deceased. Some servants couldn't help but take two steps back after being hit.

If Shuji Tsushima saw it, he would sneer gracefully: [It's really hypocritical. ]

He is not in the mood now.

He rolled up the sleeves of his kimono, put on a pair of rubber gloves inappropriately, and professionally probed the wound on the old man's neck.

[It was not very complete, it was cut twice, the first time the blade got stuck in the seam of the bone, and then it was cut off completely after two more repairs. ] He murmured something in his heart, so calm that he didn't seem like a human being.

Moving his eyes forward, Wu and Shi's swords fell to the ground.

He took a few steps closer to inspect the blade.

[I see. ] issued a clear exclamation.

[So it is. ]

"Don't cry." Huizi heard the young master's voice, which came from behind her head, the voice was cold and clear, which made her anger surge to her heart, and even overwhelmed the pain in her heart.

"What do you understand!" Her teary eyes were full of tears, Shuji Tsushima's face was reflected in her pupils, his facial features were a little blurred, and she couldn't see clearly, "What do you understand!" Her voice was hoarse like a beast, "He's dead! My blood My father is dead! I hate him, but I didn't tell him about it!" she yelled, "I'm going to tell him I hate him!"

A voice softer than the wind came from my ear: "If you really hate him, why are you crying?"

"I also have something to say to Teacher Shanren." He knelt down and looked Keiko straight in the eyes, "I want to say thank you to him."

"But there is no chance."

He murmured almost distressed: "It's like the people I like and the people who help me will eventually suffer from bad luck and die unfortunately." He said to himself, "It's really too bad." When he said this, his expression suddenly became vivid, and the corners of his mouth first rose and then hung down.

Keiko thought: [I almost sympathize with him. ]

She could feel that the young master's words were spoken from the bottom of his heart.

"Young master! Young master! Xiuzhi-kun!" There was the sound of "dong dong dong" footsteps outside the door, and someone ran wildly in the aisle with small steps. A few dozen seconds later, Ah Zhong was wearing a freshly ironed, flat kimono without a single wrinkle , rushed in from the door, she panicked, and immediately covered Shuji Tsushima's eyes with her big sleeves, and the lady faced bloody hypocrisy, which did not exist at all.

She was really worried about Shuji Tsushima.

"Let's get out quickly," she said, focusing all her eyes on Shuji Tsushima, "Don't look at it." She whispered, "Are you scared?"

Shuji Tsushima's mouth and nose were covered by the wide sleeves of the kimono. He smelled the incense on the other party's clothes, nodded hesitantly and said, "Probably." After a pause of two or three seconds, he said again, "Yes."

He tugged at the hem of Ah Chong's kimono, and said to the woman who was like a second mother: "Take me out, Ah Chong."

"Ok."

The woman in the kimono took him away.

……

The second time I met Osamu Dazai was on a bright sunny day.

In fact, it was only the second day after the death of Mr. Shanren. Ah Zhong took Tsushima Shuji and knocked on the door of Tsushima Haremon's study. The man's face was obviously unhappy, and he might be dealing with Shanren's death. At the beginning and end, a little anxious.

Shuji Tsushima hid behind the person and vaguely heard the conversation between the two.

"Yes, the child saw it. I was worried that he would be stimulated and wanted to take him out to relax."

"My children will not be so vulnerable."

"But after all, he is his teacher, please..."

"... Has anything changed?"

The voices of the two suddenly became low, Shuji Tsushima couldn't distinguish the content of the conversation, so he could only try his best to listen, and what he got was only a few fragments.

[They are talking about secrets again. ]

After a few minutes, Ah Chong came back with a superficial relaxed look on his face: "Sir, we have agreed to go out." She said in an almost coaxing tone, "Where do you want to go, Mr. Xiu Zhi?" When the two of them are alone, Ah Chong will not call him Young Master, this is Shuji Tsushima's consent, the woman who brought him up has a special place in his heart, maybe a bit like a mother.

"I want to go to the bookstore." He thought about it, "I also want to eat crab porridge from Xie Ben's."

"Why do you want to go to the same place every time?" Ah Zhong complained softly, but there was a sense of intimacy in his words.

"Actually, I still want wine." The child's expression changed, and he put on a very comfortable, coquettish face unique to children, "I really like the taste of wine, doesn't Ah Chong think they are very good? You can't drink it, as long as you smell the intoxicating smell, you will become very comfortable and your mind will be light."

"No." The young woman flatly rejected his request.

"Mr. Xiuzhi is still young, so you can't drink." She smiled softly, like a real mother, "Let's talk about it when I'm older."

"When you're an adult, you can drink alcohol."

……

Osamu Dazai loves books.

He said how much he likes it, but he doesn’t like it. It’s just that when there is no alcohol and canned crab meat, he prefers to read to pass the time.

Writing is also very good, but it needs the right time, place and people to write. He is the kind of experiential writer, and he must have enough materials and abundant emotions before he can start writing.

"Recently, I actually have plans to write a new book." Dazai was on the phone again. Since returning to his hometown in Aomori, he can only communicate with the outside world with a small mobile phone. People live in strange cities, some in Tokyo, some in Yokohama, but none in Aomori.

On the other end of the phone, editor Xiao Zhuang wearing a wireless bluetooth headset is working. He put his laptop on the ground and squatted like a migrant worker. I couldn't help but stop the work in front of me, and said excitedly: "Have you thought about the content, teacher!"

"Almost." Osamu Dazai said cheerfully, "I think about it, it may be a story about an adult teaching a child, but the adult's way of educating is very strange, always letting the child suffer some strange setbacks, or Will taunt him with bitter words, say something like 'Your existence is meaningless'."

Editor Xiaozhuang: "..."

He wished he could fly from Tokyo to Aomori right away, take good care of the teacher, let him forget his troubles, and think more about those healthy, positive, and uplifting people and things.

Editor Xiao Zhuang knows that the teacher is an experiential writer, and every book is closely related to his life.

[Isn't it because I thought about my past? ] The more he thought about it, the more he felt that he had guessed right. [The teacher once said that he is from Tsugaru, and he has not been back to his hometown for many years. If he wanted to write a book with dark content, something must have happened, maybe it brought back some bad memories for him. ]

He wished he could slap himself ten times, just in order not to stop Teacher Zhi from going to Aomori, but the deal was done, and he had to swallow any bitter fruit back into his stomach.

He said in an angry tone: "Teacher, please take care of yourself!"

"Aomori is a very beautiful place. There are delicious Mutsu apples and the sea crab that the teacher likes. If you have any unpleasant things, you can drink a little wine, but I am not with the teacher. Please don't drink too much. many."

"When you think of annoying things, please ask the teacher to try hard to remember those happy things, so that the mood will not be too bad." He said with pain, "Don't rush the new book, the teacher must take care of your health."

He had already turned on his phone and was looking at the flight ticket to Honshu Island.

Osamu Dazai opened his eyes wide, round like the pupils of a cat.

[It's too cute, isn't it? ] He thought happily, [Editor surnamed Xiaozhuang, is he so cute?Thinking of others, speaking sincerely, my mind is full of daydreams, but I am so anxious that I don't say anything.Ah, editor Xiao Zhuang is already looking at the plane to Aomori. If it is fast, he may be able to catch the one in 85 minutes, but the plane closes one hour before boarding. I hope he hasn't booked it yet. ticket. ]

"Thinking too much, Mr. Xiaozhuang." He still kindly dismissed the other party's ticket booking plan, "No matter what you are thinking, it is not what I suffered."

[My experience is ten thousand times more miserable than you can imagine. ]

"Please leave sympathy to the children in my book." He said inexplicable words again, but he was sure that others could understand them. Osamu Dazai glanced around, beyond the movable glass door, saw the streets where people were walking, Shuji-kun Tsushima is captured exquisitely.

He waved to the children who were alone, his eyes turned into crescent moons when he smiled.

[The child must have seen me. ]

"Hey, what do you mean, teacher? Don't you really need me to come?"

"I see someone worthy of love, let's talk later, Mr. Xiaozhuang."

"and many more……"

"Bye-Bye."

He hung up the phone.

[Hey Hey hey! ]

Editor Xiao Zhuang stared at the phone.

["A person worthy of love", what the hell is the name! ]

……

There is an ice cream shop next to the bookstore, and there are wooden chairs in front of the house, the kind that are common in parks and streets. Shuji Tsushima and Osamu Dazai sit on the chairs and eat ice cream.

Only the little one was holding the ice cream, and the big one was lying on his back, with his neck delicately stuck on the top of the chair back, leaning back.

This picture seems familiar.

Ah Zhong queued up to buy crab porridge, but no one was there.

"How have you been these two days?" Osamu Dazai asked suddenly.

Shuji Tsushima didn't want to answer at first, but when he thought of the young man's face, for some reason, he suddenly wanted to say something: "It's not good." dead," he said, "I guess he died because of me, and in a very miserable way at the end."

Those inner thoughts that should not be known to the young people seemed to have active consciousness in front of the young man, and they spewed out word by word, "I think I like that teacher, but for some reason, seeing his dead body, I didn't feel sad, I just thought 'ah, there is no chance to thank him', and his daughter hated him, but she squatted there and cried like a tearful person."

He had real doubts: "I once heard people say that 'the reason why people are human is because they have human emotions, emotions, joys, sorrows, joys, sorrows, can cry angrily, and can laugh freely', reverse speculation, if there is no human Can’t you call yourself a human if you don’t have emotions?”

[I am a monster. ]

"Well——" Osamu Dazai dragged out his voice, "Is that so, but from a physiological point of view, as long as you are born in this world, you are human." He sat up straight, Shuji Tsushima's face turned down Pulling, "If you don't want to laugh, don't laugh. People have many kinds of masks. Isn't it good to make a mask with no expression? Most people do that."

"Laughing masks are not cute at all."

Tsushima Shuji said vaguely, "You too."

"No." Dazai said, "I laugh because I want to laugh, it's the right of human beings."

He mentioned another unrelated matter: "Speaking of which, sometimes people can't cry."

"what?"

"If a person is crying all the time in his heart, how can he show it on his face?"

Dazai's expression was hard to see through, his eyes staring into the distance in a daze, indifferent like a god or Buddha.

Did he experience too much and let go, or is he looking back on the past?

Anyway, Shuji Tsushima couldn't understand his current expression.

Ah Zhong bought the crab porridge and walked from a distance in small steps. Osamu Dazai stood up and was about to leave, but seeing Shuji Tsushima holding a cone and the ice cream sliding down the cone, he suddenly Bend down, and whisper in the ear of the other party in an almost teasing tone: "You can ask for help."

Shuji Tsushima's eyes moved.

"Someone will hear your voice from the bottom of your heart."

……

Tsushima Haremon was very anxious.36:[-] in the afternoon is the time when he should change the file. If the task of the day is light, he will read a book to pass the time.

Today, the efficiency is extremely low. I sat at the desk for a few hours and only read half of the documents.

This is human nature, the teacher died at home, the murderer is unknown, no matter who it is, it will be uneasy, the knife took the life of No.1, who knows if it will become the second and third?

He was more worried about his own safety than his teacher's tragic death, and he valued his family's face more than his own safety.

Seeing that the approval of the documents could not go on, he simply called the phone, rang three times, and was connected.

"Hello." The man opposite was very serious.

"Mr. Silver Wolf, when can you arrive?"

"I have seen the entrance of your courtyard."

Tsushima Haraemon stood up abruptly, went to greet him, and opened the courtyard door. Sure enough, there was a silver-haired young man at the door. He had an aura that transcended time all over his body. It was hard to imagine whether he was 20, 30 or 40 years old. age.

"Mr. Tsushima." Fukuzawa Yukichi nodded calmly.

"Hello, hello." Tsushima Haraemon went up to meet him. They had never met before, but they just heard that the top swordsman was practicing in Aomori, so they relied on multiple connections to find him.

He led Fukuzawa Yukichi all the way back to the city, and told the whole story of the incident.

Fukuzawa Yukichi didn't frown after hearing this: "You want me to protect..."

"My son." Tsushima Haraemon's eyes burst into a frightening light. He probably didn't know it. Every time he thought of Dazai, and thought that he had a child who could surpass him, his face would add a bit of fanaticism.

"I don't care, but I can't accept that children are also affected." He announced, "I know Mr. Silver Wolf, you are one of the best swordsmen in Japan, and you probably haven't done much to protect people. According to my thinking, this doesn't need to be done. Too much experience, as long as you can kill people."

A few streaks of blood burst out of his eyeballs.

"Please kill all the people around Xiuzhi who are planning to do something wrong."

[Xiu Zhi, Xiu Zhi, Xiu Zhi. ]

[You are my only heir and my only hope. ] He chanted almost morbidly, [I want to overcome him, I want to defeat him, I want to trample him underfoot. ]

[This is your established destiny as my son. ]

……

Fukuzawa Yukichi disliked such tasks.

As far as his identity is concerned, there is nothing he likes or dislikes about picking tasks. He is a type of person who contributes to the country and lives in the shadows. What he does is often based on the overall situation and needs to abandon personal preferences.

Councilor Tsushima is a member of the government, a pillar of the country, and the number one figure in Tsugaru Ward. He knows many people and has built his own network of relationships. Fukuzawa Yukichi does not owe Tsushimaharaemon any favors, but other people.

This morning he received an urgent phone call asking him to leave immediately to the home of Senator Tsushima to repay the previous debt of favor.

[In this way, it becomes something that has to be done. ] He closed his eyes and meditated, holding his own knife.

[When a man is alive, it must be like this. Someone saved me in danger, even if it is a small help, I need to pay back. ]

He is the most old-fashioned samurai, he pays attention to loyalty and respects the wishes of his master. Councilor Tsushima showed him the head of Mr. Shanren before.

Fukuzawa Yukichi told Councilor Tsushima, but the other party just pondered for a moment and said to him, "Please don't tell others, Mr. Silver Wolf."

[It's really strange. ] He stood under the tree with a knife in his arms, waiting for the little Mr. Shuji Tsushima to come back. It was sunset time. From under the tree, he looked at the historic mansion of the Tsushima family from a distance, and the exquisite courtyard was covered with a layer of red light. , like a demon that can devour people at any time.

Exactly, the time of the devil.

The 30-year-old Fukuzawa Yukichi looked at the sky for a while, and then thought about the reason why he came to Aomori. He encountered some things, probably not long ago, and finally had doubts about his work.

Everyone will have it, the seven-year itch at work, and his problems are more complicated.

But when he expressed his doubts to Mr. Natsume, the university teacher with the textbooks between them only told him: "Do you have any doubts about your position? Then go to this place."

He took out a postcard from the folder, Aomori.

"Someone is coming here too." Teacher Natsume said, "Don't care what he calls himself, as long as you see a young man whose eyes are full of stagnant water but makes you feel full of life, that's him."

Natsume Soseki's beard was about to fly up: "Just say I asked you to find him."

Thinking of a series of long attributive sentences, Fukuzawa Yukichi was about to put on a dead fish-like look.

[Natsume-sensei, why do you want me to look for him? ]

"Da da, da da"

"Da da"

The women's wooden clogs made a crisp and pleasant sound when they stepped on the stone slab.

Fukuzawa Yukichi craned his neck and saw a child named Shuji Tsushima.

[This……]

The setting sun puts a layer of blood on people.