[Comprehensive Mythology] I don't want to have sex with you

In the early morning of the Heavenly Court, the deep bells sounded everywhere, and the cranes chirped in unison, and flew eastward one after another.All the immortals were dressed in court clothes, lined up in two rows, and solemnly walked into the Lingxiao Palace.

Qiao Yu stood at the front on the left, holding a memorial in his hand, which was the result of the performance appraisal of the Celestials in the last quarter.

After the conferment of the gods, Emperor Haotian didn't care about anything, and he handed over everything in the heaven to the Jade Emperor.These years have passed, and the Jade Emperor's position has become more and more stable.

Qiao Yu held the memorial and said seriously: "I will report the work performance of each department in the last quarter. Last quarter, the work performance of the underworld was the best. After two years of famine in the mortal world, a large number of souls flooded into the underworld, everyone Yan Jun and the employees of the underworld worked overtime and overfulfilled the task."

The Jade Emperor nodded, "The work of the underworld is really good, and it should be rewarded."

Qiao Yu looked at the memorial in his hand and continued: "The personnel department has prepared two reward methods for the employees of the underworld, one is to take a vacation, and the other is to go to the personnel department for further study. All employees of the underworld can choose one of these two plans. "

He turned his head and said to Yan Luowang: "Yan Jun, the personnel department of the underworld will pass on this news. Whether you want to take a vacation or study, you can go to the personnel department to sign up. It is still the old rule, whether it is a vacation or a study, everyone Come in rotation, don't delay your work. The recent training course of the personnel department is Mistress Sanxiao, anyone who is interested in the course can come and listen to it. Finally, I would like to congratulate Lord Yan, Your Majesty can see all your hard work."

King Yan Luo didn't expect that Jifu would become the best performer in the last quarter. He thought that such a good thing would never happen to Jifu!He happily cupped his hands at Qiao Yu, "Thank you Minister Qiao! This is the result of everyone's hard work."

Qiao Yu still wanted to be polite. At this moment, a golden light shot straight into the sky, and all the immortals in the hall looked out the door one after another.

The Jade Emperor ordered Qianliyan and Shunfenger, "You two go out and see what happened in the lower realm?"

Qiao Yu felt that the situation was inexplicably familiar. After a while, Clairvoyance and Shunfenger came back, "His Majesty, there is a mountain of flowers and fruits in the Aolai country of Dongsheng Shenzhou. , now the golden light in his eyes has submerged."

The Jade Emperor said indifferently: "It turns out that it is a ghost that absorbs the spiritual energy of heaven and earth and turns into a stone monkey. This is also a common thing, so don't worry about it."

Qiao Yu was stunned, no wonder he felt familiar!It turned out that Sun Wukong was born. I don't know if he will make a big disturbance in the Heavenly Palace this time.

Qiao Yu didn't take Monkey King's matter to heart.He is the head of the personnel department of the Heavenly Court. Over the years, he has been committed to improving the quality of the immortals in the Heavenly Court and minimizing conflicts between different sects, different races, and different positions.He has confidence in himself, even if Sun Wukong is the king of horses, he will like the job of raising horses!

Qiao Yu thought very well, but he was quickly slapped in the face, and after all the calculations, it was all the sins he did back then!

Sun Wukong was recruited to the sky by the branch of the personnel department. At that time, the place where the horses were raised was short of manpower, and it was not easy to transfer people from other departments, so the person in charge of recruiting recruited Sun Wukong.

Later, Qiao Yu personally asked the recruiter why he recruited Monkey King.The man whimpered and said that he thought that the little monkeys and ponies should communicate well, and that with Monkey King around, those ponies would grow strong.

Qiao Yu:? ? ?

Putting these aside, Sun Wukong is really good at raising horses, and all the Tianmas have been fattened up...

That day Nezha had something to go down to the realm, and he was stunned when he came to lead the Tianma.

He grabbed Sun Wukong's sleeve and asked, "Is this your horse? Do you raise horses or pigs? Can it run with such a fat body?"

Monkey King was displeased, "What are you yelling about? My old grandson's horse can run fast even if it is fat! If you want to lead a horse, choose a horse quickly, and don't talk to me here!"

Nezha has been in the Heavenly Court for so many years, and he has never seen anyone dare to talk to him like this.He was not angry, but felt that the monkey was quite stubborn!

He patiently explained: "These celestial horses are military horses, and there are rules for how to raise them! You have raised the celestial horses so fat, what if they can't run on the battlefield!"

Sun Wukong got impatient with his nagging! "You little dwarf, what are you going to do? I don't need you to teach my grandson to raise horses! If you want to borrow a horse, borrow it quickly, and if you don't borrow it, hurry up!"

Height is Nezha's sore spot. According to modern measurement units, the average height of male immortals in Heaven is about 1.8 meters.Of course, this is the result of removing the highest value (such as Lei Zhenzi and other two-foot-tall men) and the lowest value (Tu Xingsun).It's a pity that Nezha didn't even reach this average, he was only 1.7 meters.

With his short stature and handsome and fair face, Nezha always gets ridiculed when he leads the troops.Gradually, everyone in the Heavenly Court knew, don't mention his height and appearance in front of General Li, otherwise General Li will definitely get angry!

Nezha sneered: "How dare a petty official who feeds horses be so rampant! I have urgent matters today and I don't have time to deal with you. Tell me, what's your name! I must go and complain about you!"

Sun Wukong sneered, "Sure enough, he's a kid who hasn't grown up yet, so he knows how to sue! It's okay to tell you, I'm Huaguoshan Water Curtain Cave Monkey King! Sue if you have the ability! My old grandson has never been afraid of anyone! "

Nezha's expression became tangled, "Huaguo Mountain... Water Curtain Cave? Monkey King?"

Monkey King felt strange, "Hey? You know me?"

Nezha sneered, "So there really is a Monkey King, I really don't understand, what's going on with the HR department? It actually recruited you, a scum who has three wives and four concubines and illegitimate daughters, to the sky!"

Sun Wu was so angry that his hair exploded, "Who has three wives and four concubines? Who has illegitimate daughters all over the place? Don't spit blood!"

Nezha: "You are! You are a pervert who likes to take advantage of others! An idiot who doesn't know how to raise horses!"

Sun Wukong yelled, "I'm so angry! You little dwarf, fight me if you have the ability!"

"Hit and hit, who is afraid of you!"

Monkey King took out the golden cudgel, Nezha stepped on the Hot Wheels, took out the Huntian Ribbon and Qiankun Circle and fought with Monkey King!

After the two of them shot, they couldn't hold back, you shot, I hit with a stick, and the sky was dark and dark, as if they had a sworn hatred.The fence that closed the Tianma was smashed, and the Tianma were frightened and ran out one after another.

The movement of the Yumajian was so loud that the heavenly official in charge of the Yumajian was about to cry.The fight inside was so fierce that he couldn't bear the coercion inside even standing outside the Imperial Horse Prison, let alone asking him to persuade him to fight...

Qiao Yu and Yang Jian happened to be nearby, and Yang Jian whistled for Xiao Tiangou.

"Go and restrain the pegasus, don't let them run around and affect others."

Xiaotiangou nodded and said, "Yes! Master!"

Qiao Yu and Yang Jian walked into the Yuma Prison, Qiao Yu fixed the time near Nezha and Monkey King, and Yang Jian walked over to separate the two who were fighting together.

Unlocking the control of time, Qiao Yu asked, "What's the matter with you two? Why are you fighting here?"

Nezha explained the general situation, and Monkey King sneered and said, "You have too many troubles in heaven, you just raise a horse, and you still have to pick and choose! And this little man, he insisted that I have three wives, four concubines, and an illegitimate child." Scum. What the hell is this, I won’t serve you anymore, Old Sun!”

After speaking, he dropped his official uniform, turned somersault and disappeared.

Nezha said angrily to Qiao Yu: "I didn't wrong him! He said he was the Monkey King of Huaguoshan Water Curtain Cave! I always remember the story you told! Isn't that Princess Huanzhu just a fake?" His daughter?"

Sweat dripped from Qiao Yu's forehead immediately, "I made it up at the time, so it can't be true..."

"Why can't it be real? I think it's a real person! That monkey is so arrogant, I must personally go down to the realm to catch him back!"

Qiao Yu reprimanded: "Okay! Look at the good deeds you have done, you go to me to receive the punishment first!"

Nezha looked at the demolished house, the smashed floor tiles, and the damaged horse pen, and finally nodded embarrassingly, "I'm sorry, I was too impulsive..."

Qiao Yu still felt sorry for his own children, he sighed: "I can't slap a slap, that Monkey King is too irritable. When you see him in the future, don't mention the Princess Huanzhu again. That's what I made up for you." The story, it can't be true."

Nezha nodded unhappily, "Okay... When I come back from work, I will shut myself up and think about my mistakes."

After sending Nezha away, Yang Jian sent someone to repair the stables, and then drove all the Tianmas back.Yang Jian looked at the fattened Tianma and said with a smile: "It's good that Monkey King is gone, let him raise this horse. After a while, these horses may not be able to run."

Qiao Yu asked Yang Jian, "Do you also know about Monkey King?"

Yang Jian nodded, "Last time, after he escorted Tang Sanzang to learn Buddhist scriptures, the relationship between me and him eased a lot. Later, he asked me to help eliminate demons. Slowly, we also developed some friendship."

Qiao Yu just nodded and said nothing.

Monkey King left, but Qiao Yu got busy.He wants to hold the horse inspector and recruiters accountable.

The heavenly officials of the Yumajian are really hateful, they are busy enjoying themselves every day, the personnel department sent Monkey King over, and they put almost all the work on Monkey King, coaxing him to do all the work.These people saw that Sun Wukong was quite capable, and finally came a big devolution of power, Sun Wukong worked, and they were responsible for playing.This situation has lasted for a long time. If Nezha hadn't come today, they would have continued to hide it like this.

As for the little official who recruited Sun Wukong, it was even worse. He originally thought that Sun Wukong could write, understood etiquette, and had a lively personality, so he recruited him.He really simply felt that the little monkey and the pony could get along very happily...

Qiao Yu was very sympathetic to the recruiter, and to a certain extent, he was right.The little monkey and the pony are really happy to get along!But he didn't know that this little monkey was no ordinary little monkey!