ghost lights

"After the misunderstanding was resolved, he seemed a little sorry, maybe he felt guilty for neglecting me for so long, or maybe he was afraid that those nine words would hurt my young heart, so we ate and took a bath together again.

After taking a bath, he carefully told me that I actually have many advantages, otherwise he would not have chosen to be friends with me at the beginning. Listen, is this what people say?Then if I have no advantages, will he really look down on me?I am so rich, who is not rushing to curry favor with me, I will lack friends?

He didn't dare to look at me when he said this, it must be nonsense, just to comfort my lost heart, but even if it is nonsense, I like to hear it.

But I was obviously happy too early. Since the conflict between us was solved, he seems to have become a little different, that is, he is more unscrupulous when facing me. This is a good thing, which means that he regards me as a friend. Take me to heart.

But let me see his unknown side, do you want to hear it? "

The man stopped, deliberately showing off, and took a sip of coffee.

"Think." Li Shang was listening vigorously, and was very displeased at the man's sudden pause.

"Li Tang is a villain who only cares about profit. I asked him to do something later. He couldn't move this big Buddha without some bribes. At that time, he only knew that my family was not poor, but he didn't know that my family was actually very poor. If I have money, I didn't tell him, and he wouldn't ask others about me on purpose, because he's lazy.

Every time I ask him to go out, he says he wants to read, and the time for reading is precious, and the time I disturb him is to seek money and kill, unless there is something in exchange, do you think he is mercenary?

But I don't bother him, and now I think it's a bit cute, no, I also thought it was a bit cute at the time.

But what I can't stand the most is his attitude towards his junior.When his junior asked him to go out, he didn't take any rewards. Instead, if he had any good things, he would quickly give them to that junior. Do you think this is a human job?

I devoted my heart and soul to him, but he was devoted to others, and I felt that I was cheated on.

Later I quarreled with him again, and then we started a cold war again, this time for another half a year.

I think I'm right, so I won't bow my head first this time. No matter what I did in the past, I took the initiative to look for him. Li Tang never took the initiative to look for me once, not even once!

During the winter vacation of my junior year, my parents and I had a big fight that day, and I was so sad that I got drunk at the bar, guess what? "The man had a smile on his mouth, a happy smile.

"what happened?"

"He called me. I was surprised, how could he call me at this time? I remember it was the 27th day of the lunar calendar, and it was almost New Year's Eve.

At that time, he had already started to write novels, and he had made some progress.

I asked him what's the matter, why did he suddenly want to call me after he hadn't contacted him for half a year?And it also happened to be when I was saddest.

His answer made my heart freeze and then get angry. I can't explain the feeling. Is this the legendary telepathy?

I think I understand him, but he keeps hiding himself. In fact, he also understands me. Otherwise, why do I feel so comfortable with him? It seems that he is always accommodating me, trying to figure out my emotions. thought, and then make the action that best suits my present wishes.

This cold war ended again under his few words. I really don't understand why boys have such troublesome relationships. Isn't cold war what girls are best at?But it happened between us.

Our friendship has gone through all kinds of ups and downs and the tempering of time, and finally blossomed, but this is just my unilateral thought, I really think highly of myself.

After school started, we went to and from class together, ate and bathed together, but not long after, the cold war came again, this time there was no prelude at all, but I know why, I have to say, Li Tang is really a It's too sensitive. I've hidden it so well, but he still noticed it. Do you want to know the reason? "There was a bitter smile on the corner of the man's mouth.

"You... like him?" Li Shang has already seen that the person in front of him has a strong possessive desire.

The man admitted generously, "You are not stupid. He once told me, in his sophomore year, that he would be single for the rest of his life. It's not easy.

I don't know when it started, but I just wanted to see him. His melancholy appearance fascinates me. He can always accurately express what I think in my heart, but he rarely does this. He is afraid of talking too much. It will make me defensive, so he always hesitates to speak.

Li Tang is different from others, he is very smart and can read people's hearts, but he can't read his own heart, I asked him why he didn't want to get married, he gave me many answers, I suspect he forgot to tell me last time Which answer is it, so I made up another one, but he is not a liar, even the remade answer is a true portrayal of his heart.

One is because his parents’ marriage disappointed him, the other is because he once loved someone so deeply that he has no feeling for other people, and the other is because he still doesn’t understand what love is. After a hundred years, one is because he is too good, no one is worthy of him, and so on.

I laughed so hard, you know how funny it is for him to say with a stern face that I'm too good and no one is worthy of me, you sure don't know.

Once we hadn’t seen each other for two weeks, and we ran into him on the road. I called him from behind and asked him what he was doing recently. He said seriously, I’m busy saving the world recently, so I don’t have time to make appointments.

There are many similar words, he is like a treasure, always able to create surprises for you, I may be attracted by him like this, but he is really cold-blooded, every time we meet, he avoids me without a trace, as if I It's like a monster.

In fact, I was also very terrified at the time, I would actually have such an idea, how could I like a man?Maybe we all need to calm down, so I don't have much opinion on his avoidance, time will tell us the answer.

In fact, what I'm more curious about is whether the person he once liked was a man or a woman?What does it look like?What is the charm that makes Li Tang so fascinated?But I may never see it again. "

"Why?" Li Shang was also very curious about who that person was, and what the person Li Tang liked would look like.

"This is what I said when Li Tang was drunk. That person seems to be dead, but I have investigated. When Li Tang was in the second and third year of high school, there was only one person who died in their school, and it was a boy. But that person doesn't know Li Tang at all, it shouldn't be him, so the person in Li Tang's heart is still a mystery, this mystery, it seems, can only be buried with him forever."

"However, it is also possible that he was drunk and talking nonsense. In fact, maybe that person is not dead."

The man ordered another cup of coffee. They were in the private room, which was well enclosed, so there was no need to worry about the walls having ears. After all, there are some things that people prefer to rot in their hearts. Someone caught the handle and pulled the pigtail.

"What happened later? Did you not contact me again?"

The man stared at the white smoke coming out of the coffee, as if he was thinking about how to edit the language.

"Actually, I have never understood why he is so good to Liu Guisha. He once told me about Liu Guisha, saying that they had a fight and it was all his fault. He just sat there and ate hot pot. , while crying, and talking to me normally, there seemed to be two Li Tangs in front of me, one was crying silently, the other was calmly analyzing countermeasures, how could there be such a person? You lived with him all these years Together, have you ever seen him cry?"

Li Shang shook his head and nodded again.He had seen Li Tang cry, but he had never seen what the man said.

"Is it because you watched a frothy show or saw a homeless animal or read a tragic novel and then cried so hard?"

Li Shang's eyes widened, what the man said was right, in Li Shang's heart, Li Tang was such an emotional person, as long as he saw a little bit of evil and darkness in the world, it was like being infected with a virus, and he needed to slow down for a few minutes. God, I dare not even go out the door.

"Oh, it's innate, and I can't change it. I used to think he didn't look like a man at all. There's no man who can cry when he says he wants to. He's not as strong as a woman.

Cough, the topic has gone far again. When I think of him, there are endless stories to tell. I am still very concerned about why he treats Liu Guisha so well?I’m not bad to him, I often take him out to play and eat delicious food, but we are under the AA system, as you said, he doesn’t want to owe me favors, but he is a poor boy from the countryside, and I go in and out of those high-end places with me Where does the money come from?

Later I asked him, and he said proudly that he earned it by his own ability.His arrogant appearance at that time was like a peacock spreading its tail, with a particularly attractive aura all over him.

But later Liu Guisha got a girlfriend, and Li Tang gradually stopped contacting Liu Guisha so frequently. Once a man has a girlfriend, a woman will occupy all his eyes.

Li Tang was alone again, and he rarely agreed when I asked him to have dinner together, and as time passed, I stopped looking for him, and I haven't sorted out my emotions at that time, what kind of thoughts do I have towards him?

After I figured it out, we have both graduated for more than a year, and I found that after work, it is difficult to meet such pure friendship and love as in college.

I contacted Li Tang, and after I thought about it for countless nights, we met at Disney. He was in a good mood and seemed very happy to see his old friends. He said he wanted to play exciting projects, just chatting and drinking Tea was boring so we rode roller coasters like kids, pirate ship...  

He screamed in fright, and smiled after the end, as if he was really a child, I can't, I don't like these projects naturally, so I sat down and watched him play, like an old father, obviously I intend to show myself How did you become an old father?

When he had had enough fun, we sat on the red bench by the side of the road. I bought two ice creams. In fact, I don’t like sweets, but he likes them very much. Every time I see him eating these, it will make me feel like It is an illusion that sweets are delicious, and I eat a lot without knowing it. "

Li Shang was deeply touched by this point: "Since I was adopted by him, the sweets at home have never stopped. He would ask me to bring him a piece of fresh cream cake after school every day." Seeing that Li Tang gained weight, he kept losing weight for a while.

"Really, his favorite is cream cake, just watching him eat it is a kind of enjoyment.

Later, I directly explained my reason for coming. I was not afraid of my parents' opposition, and they didn't care about my relationship. Then he was silent, kept his head down and didn't speak until he ate all the ice cream.

He looked up at me, and I just looked into his eyes, waiting for his answer, I could see all his thoughts, and it didn't matter if I refused.

But he pointed to his heart and said: There are already people here, there is no room for anything else.

Sure enough, I was still rejected, and my heart hurt a little. I asked him who that person was, and he said that it was a non-existent person, a non-existent person, not a dead person. That was the first time he told me The deepest secret in his heart, a secret neither Wang Yukang nor Liu Guisha knew.

What kind of secret is that?I can’t remember it a bit. After he finished speaking, I felt as if I had lost my memory. I had no memory of everything that happened at that moment, but the feeling was still there. My intuition told me that I failed and lost to a non-existent people.

Afterwards we were still good friends, he didn’t get married, and I didn’t get married, so it seemed good to be friends for a lifetime. Anyway, we got along day and night after getting married, and we could get along day and night even if we weren’t married. The only pity was that we couldn’t kiss and hug each other.

Once I kissed him while he was not paying attention, it was a terrible memory, he kept throwing up and throwing up, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, as soon as I touched him, he started throwing up, and it lasted for several days. I thought there was some hope, how can a non-existent person compare with a living person, after a long time, Li Tang might be able to accept me, but I still underestimated the position of that person in Li Tang's heart.

Later, Li Tang didn't allow me to look for him again, that kind of attitude of retreating from court without incident really drove me crazy.

Later we rarely saw each other. I only asked him to see me when I missed him too much. It was really hard to find, but I knew that he didn’t want me to miss him, and wanted time to dilute my love for him. Because of feelings, they deliberately avoided me. "

The man picked up the coffee cup and shook it gently in his hand, his eyes followed the flowing black liquid.

"What's the use of saying so much now? He's already dead. The dead are the most ruthless people. The living are the most uncomfortable. It's better to forget, but it would be great if you can forget. It seems that you can't forget. There's nothing wrong with it, but I can't eat with him anymore, and I can't see him eating cake anymore.

You are his adopted son, every time we meet he will mention you, every time he mentions you he is very happy, do you know why he adopted you?I guess it's because of his cheap sympathy and pity, you are the sustenance of all his feelings, because you are young and don't understand anything, but later you understand, you fall in love, and he finds out that you have grown up Now, the feelings originally entrusted to you should be taken back, otherwise they will spread and sprout everywhere, which will make him feel panic..."

The author has something to say: I can’t save the manuscript after writing it, so I really want to post it all——