[APH Luzhong] Ivan Diary

I will apologize, I will lose money, please don't look for my sister. "

Sasha finally showed a smug smile: "Well, tomorrow you have to kneel down in front of the whole class and apologize to me! If you cry and beg me, maybe I can make you pay less..." said When he said this, Sasha's mother suddenly pinched him, so he fell silent.

"Yes." Ivan knelt and nodded.

The head teacher pursed his lips and said fawningly: "Sir, you see that he said he would lose money, is it almost..."

"Losing money, losing money! Make it up for me this week, or I will trouble you, boy!" Sasha's father threatened Ivan with grinning teeth, but unfortunately Ivan didn't look up at him at all.

Just like that, the three of them left the office triumphantly, preparing to celebrate the arrival of a sum of compensation.

"If they come to the school to make trouble again, you will be expelled!" The class teacher warned coldly, "Be honest, the poor are the poor, don't try to turn yourself over!——You go!"

Ivan got up from the ground, bowed to the teacher in charge: "Thank you for your advice." Then he left the office.

The homeroom teacher rubbed his swollen temples and slumped on the chair: "...it's hard to live."

*

"Hey, you are good at fighting." To Ivan's surprise, not only Wang Yao was waiting outside the door, but also Gilbert. I won’t bully you anymore! You — this uncle allows you to be my friend!”

Ivan didn't know how to answer Gilbert: "...I see."

"Hmph! That's it! From today on, you will be covered by Mr. Gilbert!" Gilbert nodded proudly, then laughed loudly and ran away, "kesesesese——"

Wang Yao pouted, took Ivan's hand and said softly, "Let's go."

Ivan followed Wang Yao and stepped forward.

He thought that when he went home today, he would keep smiling in front of his sister and Nata.

He thought that he would hold his sister tonight until she fell asleep in peace.

He thought he should grow up.

——Let's go, go home.

*

small theater

Gilbert: Be my uncle's friend!

Ivan: (indifferent)

Wang Yao: (indifferent)

diary eleven

I don't want to be a good kid. — Ivan Braginsky

cloudy on October 4

Being a good child is so tiring, I don't want to be a good child anymore.

*

"Ding dong!"

Opening the rusty mailbox, there was an envelope lying inside, bulging, as if it contained something.Sasha took it out and ran briskly upstairs to his parents.

The man and the woman got together and opened the envelope—it was a stack of money, which happened to be more than Sasha’s medical expenses, and there was a note attached:

Want money or kneel down?

The neat letters seemed to be snickering, Sasha's face turned red and then turned pale. He knew that his face could not be saved.The men and women also laughed foolishly.

"Where did the poor boy get so much money?" The man was a little suspicious.

"It doesn't matter whether he stole it or robbed it, it's ours anyway." The woman disagreed.

"Also..." The man nodded in conviction.

On the new envelope was written a name: Ivan Braginsky.

*

As a result, Ivan still didn't come to school.

Since that day, the story of Ivan's fight has been rumored in the school. Although the principal and teachers tried their best to suppress it, Sasha was pointed out everywhere, and the matter of Ivan's sister followed these rumors. It was spread more and more excessively.

Ivan was not at school, and Wang Yao seemed to have returned to his previous state, indifferent to the whole world, but when he heard Ivan's name occasionally, he would feel an indescribable anger and impulse.

A person's life suddenly becomes heavy.When Wang Yao had lunch alone under the birch tree, he always wondered if Ivan was hungry again.

After school, Wang Yao didn't want to go home, so he was the last one in the classroom, and then wandered alone in the street.Every day he would take a detour to the door of Ivan's house to have a look, but he couldn't muster up the courage to look for him.

Is a person's life supposed to be this difficult?

Wang Yao can't remember.His previous life was probably a chaotic jigsaw puzzle made up of his mother's afterimage and Yakov's abuse.

That day, Wang Yao didn't know anything about what happened in the office. He only heard the roar of men and women and Sasha's cry. Ivan seemed to be silent all the time.The school did not issue a notice to expel Ivan, so what did Ivan do if he didn't come to school?

have no idea.There are so many things I don't know.

Thinking of this, Wang Yao became restless.Sometimes when he went to sleep at night, he would sit up suddenly from the bed, then open the curtains, and sit quietly facing the moon all night.

Fansha lay on his knees, licking his fingers comfortingly.

Wang Yao asked himself repeatedly in his heart: What should we do next?what to do?what should I do?

These questions weighed on his mind like a huge mountain.

*

On this day, Sophia was finally willing to get out of bed.Encouraged by Ivan, she slowly got out of the bed, rolled out of the bed, squatted on the edge of the bed, and buried her face in her knees.

Ivan hugged her like coaxing a child and said, "Sister is amazing, can you stand up bravely..." Then he helped her around the room.

Sofia keeps covering her face and saying sorry, covering her face—it's a sign of shame.But Ivan didn't believe that her sister would seduce any man, she must have been misunderstood, and her reputation was now discredited.

Sophia also refused to say anything, she just scolded herself as an idiot, and Natasha, who went to work instead of her, was so tired that she fell on the bed as soon as she got home.

But it doesn't matter if you don't understand, all Ivan needs to do is take care of his family.Before his sister cheers up, he won't go to school, no matter what job he does, as long as he can make money, he will take on dishonorable, immoral, and dirty jobs, and he is best at cheating jobs.

And then he made even more money than Sofia made with a serious job.

At this time, Ivan deeply felt the powerlessness of being a good person.

Occasionally, he could see Wang Yao wandering by the door of his house. It is not an exaggeration to say that he suddenly saw a glimmer of light in the abyss. At that time, Ivan really wanted to rush downstairs and hug the child.

However, a certain sense of mission bound him, and he felt that it was not time to see the child.If they meet, maybe all the strength Ivan has managed to survive until now will be dissipated, and he will return to the self who only knows how to rely on others.

Wait, be patient, wait.There must be no change.

As if infected by an atmosphere of repression and eagerness to change, Sophia kept telling herself: stand up and be responsible for your actions, the children are watching you!

After repeating this for a few days, she finally walked out of the house again, facing people's criticism, with her younger brother and younger sister.

The family cannot rely on only two children to make money, Sophia feels sorry for Ivan and Natasha who work for her.A low-level worker like her knows that the most tiring work in the world is nothing more than that, and it is her dereliction of duty to ask her children to do it.Whether it is out of conscience or love, Sophia has to support this family again.

She went back to her boss and begged for a job, no matter how hard and tiring, under the cynicism of the landlady.They also like to oppress the poor, so they mercifully reward Sophia with a job that pays half the salary of others.

Even such a job, Sofia is glad that she got it, otherwise no one would pay the "fox" Sophia.

That's it, back to work.After working there for a day, nine hours of the same processing step can drive people crazy.Sophia, who was tired and paralyzed, was forced to listen to other people's rumors about her, vicious, nasty, whatever it hurts.Speaking of this, people seem to have let out a bad breath, and they can continue to live again.

This is the pain Sofia must suffer, to pay for her stupidity.She had blamed herself countless times, why did she fall in love with someone she shouldn't love?Why wishful thinking?

But she also thought: Whether clumsy or painful, people have to live.That's what she taught Ivan and Natasha.The mistakes made yesterday can never be washed away, but today there is still a chance to make up for it.

As if being tortured, Sophia lowered her head and grimaced, silently listening to those disgusting words, she continued to work, and the smiles of her younger siblings bloomed in her heart like flowers.She comforted herself: laugh at me, ridicule me, I will still work and make money here.

How long can it last?Sophia asked herself in a humiliated heart.

—Hold it until you can't hold it any longer.

For Vanya and Nata.

Looking at Sophia who was getting more and more busy, Ivan felt that life seemed to be dragged back to the right track by the three of them.

At that moment, Ivan suddenly felt that Wang Yao was approaching him.

Ivan said to himself: "Go and see him."

*

Wang Yao opened the window, but did not find his beloved cat Fansha.Fansha had been missing for a whole day, and he didn't come back at meal time. Wang Yao was a little worried about it.

Thinking so, someone knocked on the door.

I thought that the cat had become a spirit and learned to walk the main door, but Wang Yao went to accept the door in surprise.

However, there was a person standing outside the door, to be precise, a boy.The boy put his arms around the sluggish Wang Yao and said, "Can I stay at your place?"

"?!"

Wang Yao hesitated: "... yes."

The two boys stood in the doorway and pressed their lips together tightly.

Strange, suddenly want to cry.

*

"What? You have a son in his teens?"

"Yes, what's wrong?"

"Brother, why don't you keep such a big child by your side? When he grows up, he won't regard you as respectable."