But for the Qing, never lovesick + extra

I finally showed weakness, and blocked her wild thoughts before her eyes changed: "If I can, I'll wait here for you to go home."

I hugged her back, hid my guilt in the sky behind her, and tried my best to give her back, what I can still give now is an intimate hug.

·

We lived there for two days, passing through the last quiet period.

On the day of joining the company, Jin Yan reluctantly sent me to the entrance of the corridor like saying goodbye to a sister. She may have a faint feeling that after today, it will not be the same as before.

……

I went to the unit to report and everything went well.

As usual, a bureau leader came to give a speech, and after the speech, Team Xu gave me a cautious look.

There was no worry or encouragement in that look, so I didn't want to make any further distinctions.

Zhong Xin and I were assigned to the same squadron. Our captain explained the work requirements and asked us to disband to collect office supplies.

……

I carried those things back to my home.

Mom thinks that knowing that I started working today, she asked for leave and waited for me to go back home.

When she saw that I was only carrying a backpack when I entered the door, she was instantly surprised.

When I took the bag back to my bedroom and came out, my mother was sitting on the sofa, apparently she had something to say to me.

I broke my mother's hard work step by step, and according to the original plan, I went to the coffee table and knelt down directly.

I watched my mother stand up in great astonishment, and immediately said the prepared words, blocking her thoughts of helping me.

I told my mother frankly: I like a girl. We met in freshman year and got together in sophomore year. So many years have passed in a blink of an eye...

My mother scolded me uncharacteristically, clenched her fists and told me to shut up.

I insisted on talking, forcing my mother to listen to me.

I talked about her family background, and in front of my mother, I repeatedly confirmed that my father sent people to seek revenge on my father who accidentally killed her mother. Before I could express my determination, my mother rushed over and slapped me. He said harsh words and told me to either get out of the house or break up with her.

I looked up at my mother, forced my mother to death, and said: I must have her in my life.

At that moment, I was entangled with many thoughts in my heart, and what popped up was luck, luck that I could do something piously for me and her...

My mother was furious and smashed the glass at me.

After all, a mother is reluctant to part with her child... no matter how unfilial the child is.

The cup shattered beside me, and the tea splashed.

I have done too many things that made my mother feel sad, whether it was self-assessment when I applied for the school, or the prelude to Jin Yan, and the upcoming ones, I bet on the future with myself...

I exchanged my harm to my mother for my lawless "freedom".

I couldn't bear it any longer, and said "Mom, take care" to her, got up and fled through the door.

I didn't escape from the community, and ran into Zheng Fan head-on.

There was only a moment of panic.

I told him plainly where I was going, only concealing my motives.

As I thought, he got angry and wanted to take me home.

I reflexively suppressed him with a backhand.

There are so many new experiences in this day.This is the day when I became a policeman as I wished, when my mother was finally willing to beat me, and when I used the grappling technique that I had practiced thousands of times on my own brother...

Zheng Fan was suppressed by me and couldn't use his strength, so he called me angrily, saying that I was crazy...

I let go of him and ran away like a famine.

When my relatives broke up and I was homeless, when I was at my worst, it was Jin Yan who opened up and accepted me.

In fact, it would be more appropriate to say that I kidnapped her love and trust by driving myself to the point of nowhere.

That silly girl believed me about the so-called resignation and running away from home. She felt sorry for me, took care of me, and comforted me...

I sobbed and cried in her arms. She thought I was sad, but it was actually me complaining about myself.

I forced my mother to be angry with me, my brother to hate me, and use all my strength to lie to the people I love.

In this way, the first step of entering her house has been achieved...

·

After staying in Xiaojia for another two days, messages came in from the phone from time to time.

Hundreds of calls and text messages that no one cares about are all from my younger brother.

I unloaded the card, threw it aside, and played a decadent and world-weary person at home every day.

Jin Yan cared about me as one.I quarreled with her like this for a few days, and forced her to make a decision—take me back to her house and confess to her family.

……

On the way back by car with her, I suddenly felt hopeless—in just a few days, I couldn’t count how many times I lied to her.

I put the pressure of leaving home and being unemployed on her, forcing her to face the dark past of her previous break, forcing her to return to the place where she grew up and compromise with the darkness behind her father.

She gave everything to me, and I tried my best to break her bottom line.

Because of me, her subsequent autonomy and independence evaporated and became meaningless.

When I stopped at the stop, I wanted to jump down and escape, to a place where I could let go of calculations and relax...

It's a pity that I can't find such a paradise, and even if I find it, a person with a dark heart like me will not be taken in.

I still followed her to her house, and began that period of hypocrisy and obedience.

Her home is even more luxurious than I imagined, just like on TV, European-style villas, independent courtyards, with blue sky and green grass...

The people inside and outside her house, housekeeper, cook, servant, gardener, bodyguard, driver...the number of residents in a unit of my house is about the same...

Everyone bowed their heads respectfully when they saw her, and unanimously called her Miss.

She responded lightly to them, and the hands that clasped mine were as warm as ever.

She refused the bodyguard's help, pushed the door open by herself, and led me in.I followed her into a world that was clearly alien to me.

The spacious living room is magnificent, I looked up, and my eyes were diverted by the bright lights.

Jin Yan let go of my hand, went to push away the murals as wall decorations and dimmed the lights, and returned to push my shoulders to accompany me to sit on the sofa.

The touch of the sofa is as soft as duck down in a down jacket. I fell into it, and my heart was dragged into a trough.

I have read Jin Tian's information. He has been in the underworld for many years. He has been the focus of the police since the arrest operation my father participated in.

After my father died of illness, he "washed his hands in the golden basin", handed over business on the road to helpers, and moved to the business circle by himself. At first, he invested in stocks and saved capital to attract talents. Later, he established Jin's company, gaining both fame and fortune.

I heard that Jin Tian acted cautiously, leaving no trace of what happened back then, and even put on a hypocritical face afterwards, making the police helpless...

The luxury of his family that can be seen in front of his eyes is all a legitimate source of income.

My heart was depressed for no reason, I thought, maybe I saw the difference between Jin Yan and me.

Life experience, family background, growth environment... It's ridiculous that I still boast that I have countless common topics with her. In fact, those are all reasons for me to find ways to get close to her, right?

Jin Yan poured tea for me, the fragrance of the tea wafted into his nostrils, and his heart was cold to the end.

I shook my head and refused her. She saw that I was wrong, put down the teacup and took my hand again. Before she could make a sound, there was a continuous and gradual sound of crisp footsteps.

I followed Jin Yan and got up to look back. It was Jin Chuan who ran downstairs quickly.

He called "Sister" and moved closer to Jin Yan.

Jin Yan introduced me to him very succinctly, "This is Zheng Yang, you know."

"I know, I know." Jin Chuan grinned, and when he had laughed enough, he leaned into Jin Yan's ear and said something, which made Jin Yan pretend to hit him.

Playing around in the empty room, I relaxed a bit.

……

The three of us sat on the sofa chatting, but I was actually listening to their siblings chatting.

Jin Chuan pestered his sister to tell about our graduation trip, and his eyes lit up.

The atmosphere suddenly changed at this time.The housekeeper and servant who were talking in low voices in the hall suddenly stopped, and stood respectfully at the door.

Her siblings suddenly realized something, stopped laughing and stood up, walked around to the front of the sofa and stood side by side.

Jin Yan still clasped my hand tightly, so I naturally followed her.

From far to near, the "Master" with different timbres opened the way, and a tall man in a suit and leather shoes stepped in.

I watched him approach.

"Dad, sister is back, she's not leaving." Jin Chuan was eager to speak, maybe he saw me when he turned his head to look at Jin Yan, and hurriedly introduced me to Jin Tian, ​​"Sister also brought friends to the house."

Jin Tian handed the suit jacket he took off to the servant, and walked to him in a leisurely manner.

I think I didn't know how to restrain my emotions at that time, and stared at him bitterly, so that he would notice my existence and give me a few more glances when he got closer.

Jin Yan leaned towards me calmly.

Jin Tian's eyes moved to her naturally, "Aren't you leaving?"

He said it to Jin Yan, but she pursed her lips and did not respond.

He sighed, full of helplessness, "How long has it been since you came back? It will be again in a few days..." He hesitated to speak, and went to the sofa to take a seat first.