Life is more than just living

Liu Jingsheng looked at Han Yida helplessly, "What do you think I am? This is not a bar. You drank all the stock in this bar for me recently. Don't come here next time. It's so annoying. Look at me. How dirty is this room?" Unexpectedly, Han Yidao stumbled over, put his arm around Liu Jingsheng's shoulders and said, "Can I also call you brother? Don't you like to be someone else's brother? You also want to be my brother. Come on!" Liu Jingsheng felt goosebumps rising on his body, and stretched out his hand to push him away, "Don't be so cheesy with me, I really can't stand you." Unexpectedly, Han Yidao came over again, "You are already Chen Xu's brother, why can't you? Should I be your brother? We have a brother in common, so we are destined to be together, right?"

Liu Jingsheng sighed, "Han Yidao, don't get drunk here every day and mention Chen Xu again. If you have anything to say, just say it. There's no need to cover your face with wine! Every time you come to sober up, you never mention it." Chen Xu, you always finish your drink and tell me endlessly, Chen Xu, why bother? I know you are reluctant to let go of Chen Xu, but if you don't handle things well, she can only keep being wronged. "

Han Yidao leaned on the sofa, "Tell me, your sister, why is she so heartless? Doesn't she miss me at all?" Liu Jingsheng reached out and pushed him, and Liu Jingsheng lay on the sofa, "Why are you pushing so hard? Me? That’s too partial. I recognize you as my brother, so why don’t you feel sorry for me at all?” Liu Jingsheng brought a garbage bag over and collected the empty beer cans on the coffee table, while saying, “How do you know that Chen Xu is unhappy in his heart?” Feeling uncomfortable? She's just been used to being patient since she was a child. It's hard for her to drink to drown her sorrows like you. She's used to doing everything by herself. Don't blame her for being cruel. Everyone's background is different, and their way of dealing with problems is also different. It's different. In the past 20 years, Chen Xuguang has put in a lot of effort just to fill her stomach. She doesn't have that much time to worry about the spring and autumn. Her first priority is to stay alive.

She told me before: 'I read sixteen books just so that I could live an upright life. But here, I am never recognized. I have to be constantly criticized, insulted and belittled by his mother. If things go on like this, I will slowly lose confidence. Without the self-confidence that I have built so easily, all my efforts will be in vain. I can't let this happen. I will be sorry to my teacher, Teacher Lin, and even more to myself. . I've suffered for over 20 years and don't want to continue. I don’t want to be looked down upon all the time, otherwise what’s the point of my efforts? I suddenly didn't have the confidence to go on with Han Yidao. I knew he was very good, but since I decided to be with him, I felt the same kind of rejection from people before. I don't like such a life of low self-esteem. I worked very hard to live, just to get rid of the fate of being rejected by others. After a long circle, I jumped into this pit again, which I didn't want to do. ’

She also said, ‘Originally, I was full of confidence to welcome my new life, thinking that I would be completely transformed by going to university, but it turned out that was not possible’. Han Yidao, Chen Xu was hit hard because of you, so you can blame anyone but not Chen Xu. I know you're sad too. I can buy more beer and put it here. You can still drink to drown your sorrows. You can still puke all over my house. It doesn't matter if I endure the nausea and clean it. But think about it, you are a man, and Chen Xu is a weak woman, and she got through it on her own. I wanted to drive over to see her several times, but I felt it was inappropriate to show up now. She was slowly adjusting on her own, but as soon as I passed by, she immediately became fragile again, and all the previous efforts were in vain. . "

Han Yidao got up from the sofa and stumbled to the bathroom to wash his face with cold water. His hair and face were wet. He sat back on the sofa, watched Liu Jingsheng wiping the coffee table with a towel, and said frustratedly: "Jingsheng, you also like Chen Xu, right? Can you give her the happiness I can't afford?"

Liu Jingsheng stood up and kicked Han Yidao down on the sofa, "You coward, if I were you, I would deal with the matter at hand as soon as possible, and chase Chen Xu back before she ran away with others. What are you doing now?" What are you doing? On the one hand, you are reluctant to give up and can't come up with a solution; on the other hand, you feel guilty because you can't give Chen Xu happiness, and you want to get rid of the guilt in your heart quickly. You bad guy!" After saying this, he couldn't understand the hatred and kicked him twice more. foot. Han Yidao did not resist.

After Liu Jingsheng finished kicking, he sat next to Han Yidao and stretched out his hand to pull him up. "To tell you the truth, I wanted to chase Chen Xu at first, but after getting closer, I realized that Chen Xu is too good. As for me, I dare not blaspheme her, so I would rather be a brother and sister by her side. The reason why I support her returning to Dragon City this time is because I feel that neither can I break up nor establish myself. In fact, you two should separate and re-examine your relationship. Everyone, calm down and calm down. , I thought there would be a new way out. Who knew that you have been coming to my place to drink every day for so long, and you are not as good as a girl!"

Han Yidao felt a little sad and aggrieved, "Can I also call you big brother? You can't just feel sorry for Chen Xu but keep scolding me. Because Chen Xu has returned to Dragon City, even Grandpa Meng doesn't support us anymore. He said that Chen Xu doesn't either Pay more attention to our relationship. Now I don’t know why, but Meng Xiangyu and his daughter seemed to let me go, but my mother-in-law started looking for girls from aristocratic families for me again, and even went to my grandmother to say that the Han family was a nouveau riche. She has no background, so she decided to find a girl from an aristocratic family to be my wife. I am almost annoyed to death, what do you think I can do? Beating my father and scolding my mother is not suitable for me. I want Chen Xu, I will get a new house soon. The decoration was finished, and I really wanted to go find her desperately, but when I thought that Li Lanfeng would not give up after we got together, I didn't dare to go. I warned Li Lanfeng more than once, but it was of no use. What can I do? I can't. I almost went crazy when I beat her and couldn't scold her. But in front of my grandma, I still had to pretend as if nothing had happened. Every day when I went back, grandma would ask me, "I dare not say that I broke up with Chen Xu, otherwise grandma would feel guilty again." When I used to watch TV, I felt that the men and women there were chattering, and I thought how could people be so imprudent, but I didn't expect that it would be the same when it was my turn. How can there be a way to have both worlds?"

Liu Jingsheng patted him on the shoulder, "Yidao, you are a good person. Good people will worry so much. As long as you don't blame Chen Xu."

Han Yidao smiled bitterly and said: "Who am I to blame her? When I chased her, Chen Xu once said: 'You don't want some harm to be caused by you!' That was the sentence that made me I gave up and later, Chen Xu agreed to be my girlfriend. Although it only lasted for more than a year, I was so happy. This is the most unforgettable memory in my life. She is such a good person, so good. I don’t know how to put it into words.”

While talking, Liu Jingsheng suddenly received a video call from Chen Xu. He gently said to Han Yidao: "Chen Xu's video, do you want to see her?" Han Yidao couldn't help but nodded. At this time, Liu Jingsheng pulled him to the balcony. He first asked Han Yidao to stand beside him. After connecting to the video, he turned the camera and said to Chen Xu: "Chen Xu, look at these flowers of mine, are they beautiful? These longevity flowers are beautiful." The buds are growing, and they will bloom during the Spring Festival!" As he said that, he reached out and gave Han Yidao a hand. Han Yidao took a look and saw that Liu Jingsheng's camera was facing outward. Han Yidao looked at Chen Xu in the camera greedily.

Chen Xu talked about the trivial things that happened recently. He said that he went back to see his grandma. She kept the house spotless and was waiting for when he would go back to live there. He said that grass as tall as a person had grown in the yard of his neighbor Zhang Yong's house. He said that Wang Ran was raped. Director Li was kicked out of the Political Department; it was Chen Xu who said that Li Chang and she were students taught by the same teacher. At the end of the sentence, she fell silent. Finally, she couldn't help but ask, "I saw him recently." Is he okay? Is he okay?" Han Yidao suddenly burst into tears. He covered his mouth hard and did not dare to make a sound. Liu Jingsheng scratched his head, not knowing what to answer? Look around him. Chen Xu forced a smile in the camera, "Brother, please pay more attention to him, he must be in trouble now. He is not close to both sets of parents, and his grandma is older, so he can't tell her the pain of losing love. You are classmates and friends, you enlighten him. If he asks about me, just say that I am very good now, very good."

Liu Jingsheng couldn't help but ask, "Have you ever thought about it, maybe you are still destined?" Chen Xu glanced away and said unnaturally: "I don't want to drag both of us into pain like this. Han Yidao was originally a sunshine My big boy, after being with me, he also endured a lot. Two people who love each other should be happy and sweet together. Even if they live a normal life, they should at least be happy, but we can't do each other when we are together. Whole-hearted happiness, this kind of life is not what I want! So I thought about it and decided to forget it. If I choose a spouse in the future, I will find an ordinary person to live an ordinary life. Love is too expensive and is not something I can have. Affordable. By the way, one more thing. There is a man in our unit, the man named Yan Donglin who participated in the competition with me last time. He has been chasing me recently. There are two different voices in our unit. On the one hand, most people say he is a scumbag. On the other hand, the aunt in the cafeteria said he is nice, but he is not among my considerations. I have rejected him. Although he is still pestering me, don't worry, brother, now Our Director Li knows that I am her junior sister, she takes good care of me and sometimes blocks me."

When Liu Jingsheng heard about the entanglement, he got angry and said, "Where did this brat come from? Is he looking for death? I'll go there tomorrow and give him a warning." Chen Xu quickly said: "Oh, brother, don't be like this. Someone is pursuing me. It shows that I am attractive. The whole family asked, why is it that the marriage is not done with justice? Don’t use force. I am telling you this just to tell you, don’t worry about me, I am fine. I will have nothing to do with you in the future. I said it." Liu Jingsheng said quickly: "I understand." Chen Xu said to him again: "I have to go to bed early today, I'm a little tired, good night." Liu Jingsheng said good night and then hung up the video. He turned around and saw Han Yidao with tears streaming down his face.

Chen Xu put down the phone and sat blankly on the bed. She had an intuition that Han Yidao must have been next to Liu Jingsheng just now, she could feel it. Liu Jingsheng said to show her the flowers on the balcony, but the camera never turned around. Chen Xu kept talking about the work, concealing his mood. Chen Xu picked up the half-knitted scarf and started knitting it seriously. The reason why she bought red wool to knit red scarves for herself and Han Yidao was inspired by the red scarf Han Yidao gave to herself. The new scarf is already knitted very long, and her skills are getting better and better. The next one is going to be knitted for Liu Jingsheng, because his birthday is coming soon.