Reborn in that autumn

"On the surface, I say something directly, but in fact, I look down on it."

"A lot of people look down on you, disguised as "say what you have to say" or "I am a straightforward person". In the name of being "cheerful", they will judge you arbitrarily and even slander you."

"A truly educated and respectful person will never use words to hurt others. The so-called "outspokenness" essentially means disrespecting you and looking down on you."

"Because the other person doesn't care at all whether you will feel sad or angry because of his words, so he will speak without any scruples and do whatever he wants."

"On the surface, I am excusing you, but in fact, it is a kind of prejudice."

"Many prejudices, even discrimination, will be disguised as a form of "fairness" and "protection." For example, some people will say: Rural people are simple and cannot adapt to the complexity of big cities. This sentence seems kind, but in fact there is a hidden meaning behind it. What is more, it is the prejudice that “rural people are regarded as weak” and “not as smart and adaptable as urban people.”

"This kind of prejudice and discrimination is actually very common. For example, it is believed that girls are not good at science, so it is normal to fail in the exam. Or, for example, it is believed that top students are not down to earth, so the things they produce are high-pitched and unremarkable."

"This kind of prejudice, on the surface, is a kind of protection, to find reasons for your "can't", but in fact it strengthens the prejudice and stereotypes against you."

"And all prejudices essentially stem from ignorance and unwillingness to understand the true situation of others. Behind it is ignorance and contempt."

"On the surface I agree with your opinion, but in fact I don't agree with it."

"I believe many people have encountered this situation. Some people seem to agree with your opinions and views and praise you repeatedly. But in fact, they have never lived according to your opinions or views."

"Other people's approval is just a superficial "courtesy". It may be a habit or a cultivation of others. In fact, what you say, what you do, and what opinions you raise are ignored by others. They don't have any inner feelings. I didn’t really acknowledge you.”

"It's just that many people are confused by other people's "courtesies" and even regard them as true close friends. Only when you truly recognize a person can you think about what he says and respect his opinions."

"The kind behavior is pure and not for utilitarian purposes. It comes from the heart and is not mixed with any hypocrisy."

"Hypocrisy is a pretentious and pretentious performance that appears to be good-natured. It may have a certain purpose. It has no compassion or sympathy in its nature. It imitates good deeds in order to get good rewards or gain a good reputation. In the final analysis, it is still selfish. .”

"Don't do evil because it's small, don't do good because it's small, don't do it because it's small. This is a kind of kindness;

Already aware of the vastness of the universe, we still feel pity for the depth of grass and trees. This is also a kind of kindness.

In the beginning, human beings are inherently good, and this is even more kind. "

"But not everyone's kindness is real. Some people's kindness is based on "disguise" and they use kindness as a cover to create their own personality."

"Some people's kindness is really kind, and some people's kindness is "fake kindness."

"What is "fake kindness"?

In life, we can meet many people who pretend to be kind, and this kind of kindness is mainly a means for them to maintain social interaction.

For example:

"When you meet each other, he will ask you "Have you eaten?Have you drank?Is it cold? "

"This kind of indifferent concern is just a performance for the occasion, and it is also a means for us to maintain social contact."

"If you mistakenly think that the other person is a "good to you" and very kind person, then you may be deceived by his behavior."

"People who pretend to be kind have one obvious characteristic:

"Like to stand on a high moral ground and show their own goodness."

"Maybe you don't understand. Let me give you some examples."

"I'm telling you, I'm a very kind person, and I'm saying this for your own good."

"I'm telling you for your sake, you have to believe me."

"If it weren't for me, you would definitely not have such a good thing."

“When they get along with you, they like to prioritize kindness and use this method of measuring moral standards to make you let down your guard.”

"But in fact, what they are really thinking in their hearts is unknown."

"People who pretend to be kind are particularly good at pretending. Their behavior, language, attitude, and even expressions are all based on disguise."

"It is not an easy thing to build yourself into a "kind, emotionally intelligent person."

"Fake kind people have another obvious characteristic."

"They only talk and make all kinds of promises to you, but they never accomplish anything valuable; every time they give you hope, they end up letting you down."

"When I was studying, there would also be such fake kind people."

"Stop learning. It's useless to learn these things. Just go play. You see, I'm not even learning."

"But in fact, they deliberately encourage you not to study seriously, but privately, they work very hard."

"The purpose of this is to prevent you from surpassing him."

"This is just an example. In life and work, there are not many people like this."

"The kindness they show to you is just to achieve a certain purpose, not from the heart."

"What does true kindness look like? It's emotional empathy."

"That is: I can understand your sadness, read your sadness, and try to feel your mood from your perspective."

"What you showed is something I can understand."

“When they meet weak people, they will not ridicule them, and when they meet better people, they will not compare themselves with jealousy.”

"It's more about being normal and getting along with the outside world and others with a normal attitude."

"No matter what height he is at, what his status is, or who he gets along with, he can be treated equally."

"A person's kindness comes from the heart and will not be affected by the outside world."

"Haoran's righteousness is not affected by external things."

“If you understand it from a realistic perspective, it’s “appropriate to the situation but not to the person.”

": Have a firm belief in your heart

What kind of person can be full of courage, have firm beliefs, and not be shaken by the outside world?

Of course, he is a person with a strong heart. Such a person is called a "strong person". "

"True kindness has nothing to do with material things or objective conditions, but only with the heart."

"A person with a strong heart and firm beliefs is often a kind person because they have a strong "behavioral empathy ability."

“Because you understand, you are compassionate; because you understand, you are kind.”

True kindness is "active output", fake kindness is "for a certain purpose"

If there is any difference between true kindness and false kindness, it is undoubtedly the difference in the final result.

Truly kind people, when they do every kind little thing, do not consider their own interests, but purely considerate of others from the bottom of their hearts.