[The Silmarillion] Romimus

my dear friend:

When I received your letter, frankly speaking, my first feeling was very surprised.It was not so long since our last correspondence, and since you have never written to me on anything other than our common cause, I wondered if you had another letter in such a short time. Got new ideas and breakthroughs?Although I shouldn't be too surprised if that's the case.

I have read your letter and know the reason for your letter, and now I feel only an indescribable joy in my heart.Please don't frown, I understand that you are going through some confusion and troubles, and I swear by the names of my fathers, I am not gloating about it.

In short, I will help you analyze your troubles from my perspective.But I'm not familiar with those people you mentioned, so the following are just some thoughts from my personal point of view, just for your reference.

In simple terms, I don't know if you can understand this truth: as mortals, when we love someone, we expect to be responded to?

I know you'll counter me that you're not unrewarding to those humans, you've been generous to them.I don't doubt the truth of these words at all, and everyone who knows you should agree that you are not only not as greedy and stingy as the rumors say, on the contrary, you have always been willing to share and never hide anything.

But my dear, in this sentence, my emphasis is not on "response", but on "hope".

It is true that many times our love is beyond our control, and we are willing to continue to give to the people we love even if we don't get anything in return, but even the most selfless love, such as parents for their children, they may not They expect their children to repay them materially, but there is no pair of parents who do not want their children to love them in the same way; another example is love, many people may not expect the person they love to love themselves in reality, but most people There is still hope in my heart.

But you are not, at least from my point of view, you never expect, or more accurately, you never care who you get in return.It may be that what you give to others is not out of love, or compassion, or even self-satisfaction.I am ashamed to say that I have been with you for so long and have received so many favors from you, but when I describe the feeling of receiving benefits from you, I sometimes feel that it is like trees receiving sunshine or rain—a kind without A natural phenomenon of any emotion.Of course I'm still grateful for that, even though I know it means nothing to you.

You may be a little confused by this, since we are given but not taken, why should we complain?I have to admit that this may sound hypocritical, but please forgive us mere mortals.Most people are not just satisfied with being given, being demanded, relied on, and needed are also ways for us to prove that we are loved and that we are valuable.

You may not be able to understand again, because you never depend on others to determine your own value; in some ways, this makes me very admirable, how many people do things against their own will because they care too much about other people's evaluations Decide, you will never go this wrong way; but sometimes I always worry, have you gone to the other extreme?

I am definitely not blaming or blaming you, my friend, my point of view was once the same as yours, maybe not as firm and resolute as yours, but subconsciously, I should agree and even hope to be like you.There is no doubt that I also put my self-realization above all else.

If you judge according to your standards, because I have indeed made some achievements that no one has done before, even if the price I paid for this achievement is that tens of thousands of my compatriots were ruined and displaced, no matter what How many living and wronged souls are spitting and cursing me, but I am still a valuable person, right?

But, my friend, it's a pity that if that's what I'm worth, it came close to destroying me at one point, body and soul.To this day, I still struggle with its legacy.I don't think I need to go into details about this matter, no one knows the inside story better than you.

Obviously, this is a paradox. We want to be a person of value because self-worth gives us self-esteem and allows us to exist in the world with our heads held high. But if my "worth" is the other way around The meaning and hope of my life have been obliterated, so is this really my value?

As mortals, after all, it is impossible for us to exist independently from others, so we cannot completely ignore other people's opinions and evaluations of us.

This is where I am more shameful than you, and it is also where I often feel powerless when I persuade you: For a god who really does not need any mortals to exist in the sub-Asia, what qualifications do I have to ask you to love him? How about mortals, to care about our feelings?

I've talked too much, I've gone too far, but you don't know how ecstatic I am to read this letter, friend, friend, at last I can call you that.As I have always said before the letter, if two people—specific people, not vague groups—really establish an intimate connection, it will definitely not be a one-way relationship of giving and taking. Being needed and being needed are both, and until this letter, I never really felt you needed me.

I understand that human relationships are a burden to you.You could not care about anyone's eyes, attitudes, and moods, and just do what you want to do, but the more people you care about, the more constraints you will inevitably have in doing one thing.

I should really feel guilty about pulling you off your pedestal, but I honestly don't think so at all.Again, forgive me, my friend, for someone who truly loves you, it is such a tearful thing to get your occasional trust and reliance.

Sauron finished reading the letter in his hand expressionlessly.He didn't turn on the light, and the room with the tightly drawn curtains was pitch black, except for his pair of eyes that shone faintly like wolves.

In the deathly silence, Sauron was silent alone.

Sure enough, he thought.

Romemos and him were never in the same boat, he should have seen this clearly earlier, he obviously has been suspicious and wary, hasn't he?Why did he get confused in the end, and was fooled by that little bitch several times?

It's definitely not because Romimos is such a clever liar, at least her methods will not be better than Sauron himself. In the final analysis, he was too weak in the past. After leaving, he was flustered for a moment and hesitated, so he was led away by Romimos instead.

Furthermore, although Romimos in the first era had no heart for Angband, he was still impartial, and he was unambiguous when he dealt cruelly to those elves.

But today is different from the past. It is obvious that the current Romimos has become more and more biased towards the human side intentionally or unintentionally.

No... Sauron read the letter several times again. Although the letter used the common language of Central Continent and was very careful in wording and making sentences, some language habits that had been difficult to change over the years still exposed his identity. Most people should be an elf, and most likely a Noldor.

This is even more unbelievable, how could there be Noldor willing to make friends with Romimos after she killed the previous Noldor High King?

However, from the information revealed in this letter, we can know that the person who wrote this letter does not seem to be a kind person. If he is to stand in front of Mandos for trial, he must be guilty of serious crimes. Could it be an elf from the First Family?It can't be Fenorian, can it?But Fenorian who is still living in this world... Could it be that Maglor?

Soran stared at the piece of paper, and the more he looked at it, the more familiar the handwriting on the letter seemed, as if he had seen it somewhere before, but he had never met Maglor before, let alone met him. word.

……

Sauron's face became more and more gloomy, but after a while, he refolded the letter according to the creases and put it back in the envelope.

Now is not the time to tear yourself apart with Romemos, Sauron took a deep breath, calmed down his expression, and walked out of the room.

But that day is not far away.

At this time, Romemos on the other side didn't care why he didn't receive Celebrimbor's reply for a long time. After all, the time of sending letters across the sea by ravens and gulls is uncertain, but if the weather is bad, there will be a delay Three to five days is normal.

At this moment, she was facing the dress that had just been delivered for the official performance, and her pretty little face was stretched out.

Naquili let her dance, but she didn't tell her to dress like a clown for fun.The whole skirt couldn't make up more than two feet of cotton cloth, and most of the places, such as the chest, waist, arms and legs, were only wrapped with a few layers of light gold tulle, and the sun was embroidered with dark gold thread. Moon, water fire, snake patterns, etc., or decorated with countless small golden sequins, tassels, and small bells, but they are not embedded in them, but will sway and jingle with the movements of the wearer. Many of Zhiwu's movements are very wide-ranging. When she rotates and lifts her legs, the tassel bells also fly up, and the skin underneath is also faintly visible, which arouses people's daydream.

"I don't remember it being a go-to dance," Romimos complained half-jokingly.If she understands correctly, the dance of "Romimos" in the play should not show how powerful, noble, and fragile she is compared to "Lan Wen" as a human being. Awe-inspiring, even insane and terrifying?The only thing that has nothing to do with being sexy and charming.

When she first came to Númenor, she was determined not to let Romimus wear this kind of suggestive clothes to dance on stage.It's not because of her conservative ideas (although human beings are very talented in a certain field, it does make Romimos very pure in this respect), Romimos never cares about what others think of her, let alone in When they first came to Yiya, the Ainu had first shaped their bodies, which was so novel, not to mention hiding themselves with cloth materials, who were not honest with each other, or took pains to study, delving into each other like sons and daughters The most perfect golden ratio of their bodies, or the desire to show off the beauty of their bodies like showing off their carefully carved statues after they have achieved results, and the choice of clothing after that is more for the icing on the cake, not to cover up shyness.But then again, it's one thing not to care about revealing your body, but it's another thing for Romimos to deliberately flatter and flatter someone she hates.

But fortunately, although the clothes this time are not the usual style of Romemos, they are indeed very beautiful-"Except for the embroidery, they are still too rough." Romemos said, no one paid attention to her, and everyone knew to search the whole place. Númenor couldn't find a weaver and embroiderer who could make Romimos look good; secondly, Romimos's mood was much calmer than before, although she was very concerned about the Númenor royal family headed by Farathon and The great nobles still hold hatred, but compared to the previous desire to kill them quickly, now Romimos looks down on these people more coldly. She watched them being played around by Sauron, Digging their own graves, sinking deeper and deeper, without her action, the decline of Númenor is almost a foregone conclusion, the only suspense is how quickly and how badly they can die.Compared with Farathon, the only force that Romimos is worried about how to deal with is Sauron.Although she still didn't give up and lowered her head to seek help from Valinor, Romimos had to admit helplessly that facing this difficult enemy, she basically had no chance of winning alone.

So in the end, Romimos just complained a few words, but he didn't go on strike because of this. After decades of self-deprecating, he has grown a lot from the training of these humans.

On the day of the official performance, in addition to the dress, Naquili also gave Romemos a lot of gold jewelry, forehead crowns, earrings, necklaces, and bracelets, all of which were golden and shining, only the long black hair The hair has never been braided, and it is all loose behind her back.

Even so, Naquili still felt inadequate and detested that Romimos's skin was too white, like a person made of ice and snow. Under the light of lamps and candles, it was a bit more dazzling than gold.Without any explanation, someone brought two barrels of tung oil over, and before Romemos could react, he smeared her face. Afterwards, he realized: "Huh? Can you change the color of your skin by yourself? deep?"

Romemos wiped his face, what else could he do but smile wryly, his face was all painted, what's worse than that on his arms and legs?

Naquili also became a little embarrassed, and changed the subject to Romemos and said, "Do you remember the first time we met?"

"Of course." Romimos's memory has always been impeccable.

"You sang a song at that time." Naquili showed nostalgia, "But it's strange to say that generally no matter what the song is, I only need to listen to it once, even if I can't recite the complete score, it's impossible not to leave a little impression on it, but I can't remember the song you sang now. However, I remember the way you sang clearly. At that time, I thought I was doing something really great, Gao Overestimating myself, yet daring to belittle a real god, in the end she was clearly shocked, and she had to pretend to be calm for the sake of face."

"Really? Is it more shocking than when you saw the score I gave you?" Romemos asked jokingly.

"For a drop of water, what's the difference between a big river and an ocean?" Naquili said.

For Naquili, whether it is Maglor or Romimos, they are existences that she can't reach no matter how much she stands on tiptoe and stretches her hands, but if she insists on comparison, Maglor is Like a towering snow peak, Romimos is a star in the sky.

Although Maglore is already the peak that Naquili can only hope to reach if she lives another 1 years, Naquili can still vaguely perceive the gap between the two, because she is not really a complete Mediocrity, on the other hand, is precisely because she knows how unsurpassable the top of the mountain is, which makes Naquili more painful and almost collapsed.

Romimos is not the case. Although Naquili knows that gods must hang high in the sky, at a height that mortals cannot touch, she has no concept of their power and wisdom.Just like the stars hanging above the sky, people can only capture their sometimes twinkling starlight occasionally, but they can't estimate how far away they are from themselves. What's more, they laugh at the dimness of the starlight, which is not as good as the fire in the world More powerful.

What's more, Romimos never deliberately showed off her divine power to mortals, flaunting her extraordinaryness, except for her arrogance and arrogance when she first came to Númenor, after a little familiarity, everyone in the Arlando Theater was surprised I found that she was very easy to get along with. She was not only pleasing in appearance, dexterous, and knowledgeable, but also answered questions and responded to requests. At that time, almost none of the hundreds of people in the theater didn't like her.

Of course, being easy to get along with is good getting along, but it is impossible to really want to go further in the relationship.After all, there is still an invisible wall between Romemos and other people. Most people bump into the wall several times and realize that she is hot on the outside and cold on the inside, so they can only maintain a superficial harmony.

As long as you keep a certain distance, Romemos is a pretty girl who is smart at first glance, but with a slightly eccentric personality. There is nothing special about being born as Maia.

Only once, Romimos used the most intuitive way to reveal to Naquili a corner of Enu's true face, that is, the first chapter of creation.

Just like what Naquili said, she didn’t memorize even a single note of that movement, because even though it’s called a movement, it’s not the melody that mortals understand in essence, but more similar to the rule of cause and effect of the operation of all things, Intertwining and responding to each other, finally constituted the fate of Arda.

All Naquili can think of is what she felt when she listened to Romemos sing: it was like a huge wave higher than the mountain had rushed towards her in an instant, like a rolling yellow wind wrapped in thunderstorms and dust In an instant, everything was razed to the ground, just like a thick night engulfing the sky and covering the wilderness.It was a primitive, overwhelming, absolute power without any mercy. She didn't come with a mission of destruction, but she destroyed every place she went, like a broken bamboo.

Then out of the blank darkness, the golden sun rose again.