Eunuchs who traveled through the Qing Dynasty

Monk Hua was the first to jump up: "Fuck you! Go back and ask that bastard Rui Lin if his head has been eaten by a sow and a mouse has been eaten. Fuck, my life is in my hands at any time. Generals singled out? *** daydreaming!"

As he spoke, he spread his palms to blow the messenger out.Xiao Ran frowned and said: "Quality! Pay attention to quality! Taoism is the beauty of an adult, what a gentleman does. Since Ruier has such an idiotic request, how can we refuse? Go back and tell him, see you on the battlefield tomorrow morning!"

In fact, the messenger did not expect that Xiao Ran would agree at all, and he agreed so happily that he was a little dazed for a while, and after asking several times, he was sure that he had heard correctly, and happily went back to report.Cheng Tong said worriedly: "My lord, even though that fellow Rui Lin was injured, he was born as a bodyguard after all. If you were to fight one-on-one, I'm afraid you..."

Sheng Zuo also couldn't laugh or cry and said: "Yes, there is a saying that Zhuge Liang's three spirits are Zhou Yu, so there is no reason to single out Zhou Yu with a goose feather fan!"

"Damn, you little boy!" Xiao Ran smiled contemptuously, "I'm afraid he will turn the world upside down! Brothers, watch how I torment him tomorrow!"

The next day, at the second quarter of the hour, people and horses had a full meal.The city lined up.The three-way drum sounded, the flag was opened, and a general was held on each side.But I saw that General Xishou was the former sixth-rank Lanling bodyguard, the son of Xilabu, the commander of Shanhaiguan, Zhunforefu Ruilin, with a rotten silver fine iron helmet on his head, and a chain-linked iron armor on his body.The front and rear bronze mirrors protect the heart, and a scarlet embroidered battle robe with a collar.Sit down on a horse with some flowers and rouge, neighing in the wind; walk the water green gun horizontally with your hands, and shoot cold light.

It was Xiao Ran, the reborn young eunuch of the former Kunning Palace, the deputy chief executive from the official ranks, and the self-appointed principal of the special military academy, who played the first battle in the east.His head was wrapped in rags, and he was wearing a gaudy, half-length cloth gown. He sat down on a little donkey with long ears and thin spine, his head drooping, and he held a big chicken leg in his hand.Open your mouth and chew.

This outfit can be called the No. 1 single-handed general.Throughout the ages, it is unmatched.The cheering military academies on both sides saw each other and fell into a coma.

When Rui Lin saw Xiao Ran, his eyes burst into flames, he shouted loudly like a thunderbolt, he raised his gun and galloped, as if flying towards him.Xiao Ran chuckled, took out something from his bosom, and threw it at the head.Ruilin has suffered a lot from the grenade these days.Thinking that this guy was playing tricks, he threw a flower bomb with his hands, and he couldn't help being surprised.When I was in a hurry to hide, the thing fell to the ground with a plop, and when I looked closely, it was still a chicken leg.

In a rage.Rui Lin rode his horse and snatched it up. Seeing that a chicken leg missed, Xiao Ran turned the donkey's head and ran away.But the donkey was thin and limping and couldn't run fast. Look around the mountain pass, and it will be overtaken.Rui Lin wished he could poke a transparent hole in him and kick the horse's belly desperately.Seeing that it was almost enough, he suddenly sat down, and with a bang, he and his horse fell into the oldest pit.The helmet also fell off, and there was a big blue bump on the forehead.

Xiao Ran turned the donkey's head, approached the pit and said with a smile: "Why should Rui Efu be impatient, it's just a one-on-one fight. Why are you so desperate? There is a saying that swords and guns have no eyes, why fight and kill like monkeys. I think so, Let's fight to decide the winner, rock paper scissors, what do you think?"

"You, you despicable villain, how dare you cheat!" Ruilin was trembling with anger, and he didn't know where the strength came from, and he jumped out of the trap even though he was kicking and crawling.Xiao Ran shook his head and sighed: "It's a pity that I have such a good intention! Come here, the girls are waiting for you!"

Before the words fell, there was a strange scream of wow, and a group of about a dozen thick village women came out of nowhere from both sides. Where are they girls? He opened his arms and rushed towards Ruilin viciously.Rui Lin had never seen such a scene before, his legs were so frightened that his legs went limp, and he was about to jump back into the pit when he was hugged by a shrew.All the women rushed forward, pressed him to the ground, took off his armor, and began to tear his clothes and trousers in a hurry.Poor Ruilin boasted that he was gentle and courteous, and he was suave, but at this moment he couldn't struggle even with all his abilities. He kept screaming, and watched helplessly as a group of shrews tortured him wantonly, and he was stripped naked in a short while.

This place was blocked by the mountain pass, and the soldiers under him couldn't see it. Ruilin was so angry and scared that he almost fainted.On the other hand, some village women were not shy at all, pinching and groping his body with their own hands, yelling in one go:

"so white!"

"So tender!"

"It's so small!"

……

Ruilin couldn't bear it anymore, tears rolled out immediately, and he called for help.At this moment, a series of gunshots suddenly sounded from the other side of the mountain mouth, like beans bursting, deafening.Rui Lin's eyes were darkened, his heart was cold and cold, knowing that his soldiers had also been tricked, he cried loudly: "You despicable villain, you said you were going to be singled out, woo woo, you don't keep your word!"

"Haha, you're so cute!" Xiao Ran jumped off the donkey, patted his face and said, "My little friend, uncle tells you: first, with a person like you, there is no need to speak of trust; second Two, if you fight me one-on-one, it’s nothing more than a tactic to slow down the troops, right? I set up twelve checkpoints on the way to Jianchang and Shanhaiguan, and all the people passing by will be searched. If I’m not wrong, you sent a total of four The messenger, isn't it?"

When Rui Lin heard this, his eyes went dark, and he felt that all thoughts were lost.But Xiao Ran continued to laugh and said: "Third, I admit that I am despicable, but I am not a villain. Because, I am bigger than you everywhere."

There were less than 500 people in Ruilin's remnants, but the battle was over after the cup of tea.This time, no one was left alive, and all were killed and buried.The naked Rui Lin was escorted back to the tent by a group of village women, and the whole journey was like a show. At this time, he really hoped that a stone would fall from the sky and be crushed to death, but unfortunately it was not possible.

After tying Ruilin to the stake, everyone was talking about how to torture the poor guy.Xiao Ran smiled and said: "Rui Efu was very energetic that day, he chased me hard and beat me, and even poisoned my wife and children, did you ever think that this day will happen?"

At this moment, Rui Lin's hair was disheveled, his face was pale, and he hissed, "If you have the guts, kill me quickly!"Xiao Ran said: "Good job, it seems that you really have two hard bones in your body. When will your hard bones be worn away, it won't be too late for us to kill you."

Monk Hua shouted: "My lord, why bother to think so hard? Look at this guy, who is skinny and tender like a rabbit, let the brothers take turns to fuck him once, until his ass blooms, and see if he dares to talk hard!"

After hearing this, Rui Lin was so horrified that he almost fainted.Xiao Ran also hesitated and said, "Isn't it good to do this?"

Huh~!Fortunately, this fake eunuch is not too beastly!Rui Ran said again: "I mean, we also have six or seven hundred brothers now. If one person takes a round, it must be impossible. Then, if you don't get the land, you will suffer a loss? This is not fair. How can you think about it?" How to get everyone to take their turn is the key issue.”

Ruilin screamed wildly, spewed blood, and immediately passed out.

Without ordering, Liu Tao had already brought a bucket of cold water and poured it on his head. Rui Lin shivered violently and woke up.Thinking about my dignified forehead, demeanor, literary talent and martial arts, which is not outstanding, and I have been pretentious all my life, but in the end I will become the child prostitute of this group of stupid people, it is so painful.

But Monk Hua refused to let him go, and shouted: "Come on, brothers, lift him up!" Before the brothers could make a move, the gang of village women laughed and pushed Rui Lin down on a big rock, with his head Hold down tightly, splitting Lao Gao with both legs, afraid that he would kill himself by chewing his tongue, and stuffed a big ball of filthy cloth in his mouth.Rui Lin was already half-crazy at this time, the fish on the chopping board could not struggle, and could only let it be wreaked havoc.

At this moment, a brother shouted: "My lord! The princess is here!"

It turned out that Xiao Ran had specially ordered his subordinates to guard the princess carefully and not to be rough, so the brothers did not dare to stop her.Ning Wei heard the commotion in the camp, braced her sick body, and came to look for Xiao Ran, and said angrily: "Killing him is nothing more than nodding, since you have captured him, kill him, why are you so cruel? ?”

Xiao Ran snorted, and remained silent.Cheng Tongtong: "Princess, let's talk about karma in everything. It's not like you haven't seen how this fellow harmed your lord before, and he almost killed two people! Today, your lord treats him like this, it's still polite." !"

Ning Wei supported the tent, panting, beckoned to Cheng Tong and said, "Come and help me." Cheng Tongxin said that this woman was about to lose her temper.But after looking at Xiao Ran, he didn't dare to refuse.Had to go forward to help her.Unexpectedly, she reached out her hand suddenly, pulled out the hunting knife on his waist with a jerk, flipped her wrist, pressed it against her neck, and said to Xiao Ran: "Since Rui Lin harmed your wife first, I will use this life to kill you." Pay you back for him. Is it enough?"

In fact, according to Cheng Tong's skills, it was not difficult to snatch her knife back then, but the incident happened suddenly, and the point of the knife had already reached her throat in a daze, so how dare she move it?Seeing the sharp point of the knife pierce the skin, and blood oozes out, he said anxiously: "Well, what are you talking about? There is something to say. You put the knife down first."

Ning Wei ignored him, her face was pale, and she smiled sadly: "Xiao Ran, didn't you just say you were going to kill me? I have humiliated you like this, and I don't want to live anymore. I just hope you can let Rui Lin go." Yima, if there is any hatred, I will pay you back. I know you are a fake eunuch. I am afraid that the relationship between my sister Xin'er and you is not just a slave master's relationship? I will call you brother-in-law today, we They can be regarded as relatives. Even if you don't think that Brother Huang was good to you when he was alive, I hope that for Xin'er's sake, I can do one or two for you."

Seeing her beautiful and haggard face full of determination, Xiao Ran felt like a sledgehammer hit her heart hard.She said in her heart that if she was thinking about me, she would rather die immediately, and it would be worth it!Then he cursed secretly: "Bitch."When you see a woman, you forget everything, even the deepest hatred in the sea?Besides, if you beat the snake to death, if you really let Ruilin go because of a woman, that would be letting the tiger go back to the mountain, and you might bring yourself some trouble in the future.

But the beauty in front of him couldn't watch her commit suicide no matter what.Just looking at Ning Xin's face, he can't ignore her life.Xiao Ran rolled his eyes, and said with a smile: "I heard that the Aixinjue Luo family has always been as good as it is. It never contradicts what you say, Princess Ning Wei, I don't know if I'm right?"

When mentioning the family, a look of pride flashed across Ning Wei's face.Said: "Of course. I love what Xinjueluo Ningwei said, and I never regret it!"

Xiao Ran laughed loudly, and said: "I don't know. I remember that the princess made a promise to me that day, but it hasn't been fulfilled yet. How can I trust you?"

This is a bit Meng Lang's words, especially when there is Rui Lin next to him, Ning Wei blushed a little, and said sullenly: "Nonsense, when will my majestic princess make a promise to a slave like you?"

Xiao Ran shook his head and sighed: "Look, girls are like this. They forget what they said when they turned around. On the night of the New Year's Eve, the princess really doesn't remember the lantern viewing in the Wenxiang Pavilion?"

Ning Wei thought about it for a while, and suddenly let out a low ah, remembering that day in the lantern riddle competition, Ruilin lost, and she had begged him to let Ruilin go, and she did say that she would agree to him on one condition.At that time, I was in a hurry, so I didn't choose what to say, not to mention how regretful I was.She is naturally smart, how can she not see that Xiao Ran has evil intentions?Think about it, every time this guy looks at his lustful eyes, it's as if he wants to take off his clothes.I used to think that he was just an eunuch, and it was fine, but now that I knew that he was a fake eunuch, I panicked even more.If this guy says he wants to be his wife, what should he do?

After hesitating for a long while, he said firmly in a low voice: "Although that is the case, I would rather die than agree to you if it violates my conscience and morality. If I want to see Ruilin die, I will definitely not."

Xiao Ran said with a smile: "What do you think the princess thinks of me? Really. How about this, as long as you promise me one thing, I will release Rui Lin immediately, what do you think?"

"Really?" Ning Wei was overjoyed at first, then remembered that this guy had always been scheming, and couldn't help but asked suspiciously: "Tell me what it is first."

"It's not difficult. But I can't say it here, princess, please come with me."

Xiao Ran turned around and walked into the tent, Ning Wei hesitated for a while, then followed in, the knife in her hand still refused to let go.Rui Lin over there heard the conversation clearly, and thought to himself that this fake eunuch reincarnated from a pervert, how could anything good happen?In a moment of anxiety, the eyeballs popped out, and he screamed indiscriminately.Monk Hua slapped his head and slapped him: "Call your mother! F*ck, I'll be careful if I call you!"

Cheng Tong was also anxious, and said that if Rui Lin was let go, it would be strange if he didn't retaliate later.Hastily called Monk Hua, Liu Tao, and Sheng Zuo aside, and said in a low voice, "Do you think your lord will really let that kid Rui Lin go?"

"No way?" Monk Hua scratched his head, "This time I've dealt with this guy so badly, if we cut the weeds and don't get rid of the roots, then why don't we fuck up? Your lord is so resourceful, can't you think of it?"

Liu Tao pondered and said: "I see Xuan. Is the hero sad for the beauty? I think the lord will not be able to stand the princess this time."

"Damn it! If this is the case, the monk will try his best to get rid of his head, and will sneakily kill this guy! The heads on the left and right are also stored on the neck." Monk Hua said viciously.

Several people discussed, and after a while, Xiao Ran and Ning Wei walked out of the tent.Xiao Ran said: "Come here, change the clothes of General Rui and send him out of the camp!"

Only then did a few strong shrews loosen their arms.Rui Lin got up quickly, tore off the rag from his mouth, and shouted: "Princess, Wei Er, what did you promise this bastard? Ah? What did you promise him?"

In desperation, this guy didn't care about his naked buttocks, so he came to pull the princess.Ning Wei came here with the determination to die, but when she saw him naked in front of everyone, she rushed up, shy and anxious, stomped her feet and turned around to leave.Xiao Ran gave him a wink, and Monk Hua grabbed his braids and pushed him to the ground, shouting: "Damn, my lord let you go, why don't you thank me quickly? I don't know what's good or bad!"

Rui Lin's eyes almost burst into flames, he stared at Xiao Ran, and yelled like crazy: "I'm not leaving! I'm not leaving! Bastard, kill me if you want to! Tell me, what the hell did you ask her to agree to?" What happened? What did you do to her?"

"Haha! Tell you what can you do to me?" Xiao Ran smiled obscenely, "Rui forehead, this kind of thing is out of your hands!"

Ruilin didn't have the right to speak because he was a swordsman.This time Xiao Ran was simply not ordinary.Not only did they take clothes for Ruilin, but they also left a horse, and then a group of brothers beat and kicked them "enthusiastically" and sent them out of the camp.

The horse is a good horse, fat and strong, with a bright saddle lock.It's a pity that the clothes are really small and pitiful. In fact, they are just a woman's red bellyband.Rui Lin was so angry that he almost vomited blood. He was born in a noble family and lived for more than twenty years. How often has he received such treatment?Thinking of his wife falling into the hands of that lewd fake eunuch again, it was a great shame, and for a moment he wished he could strangle himself to death with the reins.Just cried a lot on the hillside, and the secret path left the green hills, and it is not too late for a gentleman to take revenge for ten years.When Lao Tzu returns to Shanhaiguan and brings in a large army, he must smash the fake eunuch's corpse into thousands of pieces.

Rui Lin rode on his horse, Monk Hua hurriedly came to look for Xiao Ran, and they all said: "Let him go like this, wouldn't it be a return to the mountain? He will definitely lead the army to take revenge in the future, what can I do?"