Florida Man's General Store in Cultivation World



Chapter 164 – Florida Man Killed Local Emperor and Two Princes as They Refused to Purchase His Fake Meds

As Leo had suspected, Yan Xiang purposely delayed the match while he activated the talismans underneath the arena. He waited for the array to cancel the effects of rejuvenation tea.

"This should be checkmate. Once we expose his trickery, he will lose."

Nothing could go wrong with this plan. He believed he could force Leo to leave the country like this.

RUMBLE

Suddenly, the ground shook, and all five arena stages cracked. Then, the earthquake stopped.

"Huh?"

Yan Xiang frowned as he could no longer sense the talismans under the arena. He raised his index finger and pointed at one of them.

Nothing happened. Yan Xiang couldn't sense anything.

"What?!"

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Cat retracted her roots and pulled out a stack of talismans. She passed them to Leo as she couldn't eat them.

"Nom-Nom Meow?"

Leo rubbed her head with his hand. He stored the talismans in his storage ring, planning to eat them later. He then looked at Ivy, checking her condition.

Her complexion looked better. Although she looked slightly older, no one should be able to notice it since she was still covering her eyes with a black blindfold cloth.

As everything was under control, Leo shouted at Yan Xiang, "Why are you delaying the matches? We don't have all day!"

Yan Xiang bit his lower lip. As he realized that he couldn't use the talisman arrays to the fullest, he resumed the matches.

"…Proceed, referees."

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The semi-final rounds were as Leo had predicted. Without Yan Xiang's trickery, Ivy, Marc, Esen, and Beatrice easily defeated their opponents. As for Gao Yan, he seemed to have an epiphany or enlightenment from the previous fight.

Before Gao Yan's match began, he readied his pistol while he switched on the energy sword with another hand. As soon as the referee signaled the match, Gao Yan shot his opponent without hesitation.

His next opponent was still a soul formation cultivator. As he came prepared, he managed to dodge the first bullet. Unfortunately, he didn't know that Gao Yan's gun was an automatic one.

BANG

The second bullet hit the cultivator's stomach. It wasn't fatal enough to kill. However, the opponent immediately gave up as he was afraid of the unknown effects of the bullet.

The semi-final round was over by noon. The next was the final match of each bracket.

Nothing changed in the final. The opponents of Esen and her subordinates forfeited before the fight.

However, Gao Yan faced another wall. His next opponent was none other than Yan Zhu.

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Yan Zhu got on the same stage as Gao Yan. He also eyed the black pistol in his opponent's hand.

"Brat. Where did you get your weapons?"

Gao Yan slowly climbed on the stage. After reaching his position, he got into his personal combat stance – Gun and lightsaber in a different hand.

"None of your business, prince."

"If you sell them to me, I'll give you anything – spirit stones, cultivation resources, cultivation manuals, status, women, ANYTHING!"

"Not interested, thank you."

"I see. That's a shame. I'll pry it from your dead body, THEN!"

Without waiting for the referee to officially initiate the match, Yan Zhu pulled out a homemade pistol, which was preloaded with an essence stone. He aimed at Gao Yan's head and pulled the trigger!

"!!!"

Gao Yan was shocked when Yan Zhu pulled out a similar weapon. He swung the lightsaber at the incoming bullet.

The lightsaber contacted with the essence stone bullet. As soon as they touched, the essence stone exploded.

Mushroom flame and black smoke erupted. Half of the arena stage instantly vanished while the shockwave blast destroyed all watchtowers in the area. Some weak spectators were blown away like a ragdoll while court officials bellowed, summoning their dao avatars to protect them.

"HAHAHAHAHAHA!!"

Yan Zhu burst into laughter while he reloaded another essence stone. He aimed his gun at the middle of the flame.

"This is what you get for refusing my offer! Now, I'll be prying your weapons from your dead body! HAHAHAHA!"

Yan Zhu turned to the referee.

"Announce the result! The match has ended!"

The referee sweated profusely as Yan Zhu broke the rules. The former hadn't announced the start of the match yet, so the preemptive strike was a foul.

"Y-Your Highness, the match hasn't started yet."

"Are you blind?!" Yan Zhu yelled at the referee, who was an eunuch of the imperial court, "Finish the match. I've won!"

"Y-Y-Yes, Your Highness. Alright. The winner is-"

BANG

Before the eunuch referee could announce the result, a sacred wood bullet cut through the air and pierced through Yan Zhu's mouth. It broke his front teeth and exited through the back of his head.

The silhouette of Gao Yan got clearer. He walked out of the flame. His black suit was untouched. However, his skin was slightly red as it got a bit of burn.

Gao Yan readjusted his aim. He pulled the trigger and fired more rounds.

BANG

BANG

The second shot hit the center of Yan Zhu's forehead. The other pierced through the prince's left chest.

"…"

Yan Zhu was still smiling, but his body stiffened. He fell to the ground and stopped moving.

The spectators were in silence. Everything happened so fast that they didn't know how to react.

"Wait, what?!"

"T-The match hasn't even begun, but why?!"

No one understood what the prince and Gao Yan just did. Only Leo, his people, and Yan Xiang knew about the weapons.

Yan Xiang silently looked at the lifeless body of the third prince. He was neither sad nor angry. Instead, he was happy that Yan Zhu died. Because of Yan Zhu's death, he had a reason to take advantage of Leo.

The emperor announced, "Fighting before the signal is a violation. Both Yan Zhu and Gao Yan are disqualified from the tournament. Also, the last attack has been committed outside of the tournament event. It will be charged as murder. Arrest that man at once!"

Cultivators from Yan Xiang's faction moved. They descended and surrounded Gao Yan from all sides.

Leo deeply sighed. He tried his best to play nice, but he had enough of this nonsense. He warned Yan Xiang, "I assume this is a declaration of war, donkey emperor."

"Immortal Florida Man!" Yan Xiang pointed his finger at Leo, "Your team has violated the rules over and over again! Your team will be disqualified. No excuses this time! You will be expelled from this conti-"

BANG

Leo pulled out his pistol and pulled the trigger. The upgraded bullet hit Yan Xiang's forehead and exploded, shattering his brain everywhere. His headless body stood still for a moment before it fell to the ground.

"YOUR MAJESTY!!"

"EMPEROR YAN!!"

Yan Xiang's goons rushed to see their leader. But when they saw Yan Xiang's remaining head, they gulped.

WHOOM

Although Leo managed to destroy Yan Xiang's head, his soul was ejected from his body. Remaining as a spirit, Yan Xiang bellowed and ordered his people.

"Immortal Florida Man has attempted to assassinate me! People of the Yan Empire! THIS IS TREASON! THIS MEANS WAR!!"

Leo silently gazed at Yan Xiang's soul.

"Dafuq? How is he still alive?"

Esen crossed her arms and explained, "Quasi-immortals can detach their souls from their bodies before they die. If they manage to possess a new body in the remaining time, they can self-resurrect. I saw many immortals and quasi-immortals abusing this trick to escape death. Most of the time, they possessed and killed their descendants in the process."

"Talk about good parenting. Wow."

Yan Xiang acted as Esen had predicted. His soul vanished into Yan Luo's body. The latter screamed in shock as he was aware of this technique.

"FATHER, NOOOO!!"

It was too late for Yan Luo to realize. From the very beginning, Yan Xiang had been keeping his sons as spare bodies for him to self-resurrect.

Yan Luo's soul was absorbed into Yan Xiang's soul. Then, the emperor took over Yan Luo's body and instantly restored his cultivation base. Moreover, he gained a new power from Yan Luo's dantian.

RUMBLE

Because of the reincarnation technique, Yan Xiang's cultivation soared. His aura expanded, and his elemental Qi summoned clouds of heavenly tribulation.

Orange clouds covered the sky. Orange thunderbolts descended in front of Yan Xiang.

BOOM

The sudden appearance of orange tribulation thunderbolts scared the spectators and bystanders. Everybody fled the scene, ignoring Yan Xiang and the tournament.

Leo didn't know what to feel about the villain getting new powerups. He silently pointed his gun at Yan Xiang's new body. Then, he pulled the trigger.

BANG

PU!

Yan Xiang, who was still laughing like a lunatic, got hit in the head for the second time. His head exploded once again, and one of the orange thunderbolts hit his body.

BOOM

Yan Xiang's new body and soul were purged as the emperor attempted to advance to an Earth Celestial Immortal. The body and soul dissipated into dust, never to be reincarnated again.

As soon as Yan Xiang died, Esen frowned at Leo.

"That's quite rude of you. That man is about to face a heavenly tribulation. You're supposed to wait for him to finish. Anyway, you should have done this ages ago. What's stopping you?"

"…I just wanted customers. I guess I'm not suited to be a salesman."

"A salesman doesn't kill his customer."

"Too late."

Leo looked up. The orange clouds slowly dispersed as Yan Xiang died during the chaos.

"Let's go home. I think we're done here."

The yellow tattoos on Leo's forehead vanished as Yan Xiang was killed. There was no one to adhere to the agreement. Therefore, the contract was voided.

"What about the prizes?" Asked Esen.

"We'll take them on our way home. Let's send the kids to the bus first. Then, we can ransack this place."

Esen grinned and elbowed Leo's side to punish him for being unnecessarily protective.

Leo called Gao Yan over. Everybody ignored the city rules and flew back to the bus, which they had parked outside the city.

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Situ Bai and Ouyang Ke were still affected by the emperor's death. They looked at each other for a moment. After seeing each other's white faces, they realized something important.

Without an emperor, their clans could rise. It was the time for their clans to mobilize their men to seize the capital city and plunder the palace's treasures.

All former servants of Yan Xiang dispersed. Although some of them were sad and shocked by the emperor's death, their greed guided them back to their headquarters to relay the news.

"The emperor is dead. It's time for changes."

Meanwhile, Tang Xuan was astonished by the abrupt chaos. In a flash, Yan Xiang, Yan Luo, and Yan Zhu died one after another. Tang Tian was also shocked. He was prepared for the Yan Clan's demise, but he didn't expect it to be this fast.

The two Tangs consulted each other.

"Father, this is chaos! The Situs and Ouyangs will bring their armies here soon. Their immortals will also be here. What should we do?!"

Tang Xuan closed his eyes and groaned, "We join forces with Immortal Florida Man. Go tell everybody in our clan and Sixth Element Sect to migrate to Magpie City."

"Y-Yes, father!"

Tang Tian and his men flew back to their clan's manor. As for Tang Xuan, he opened his eyes and followed Leo to his bus. He was determined to join Leo's side.