Qingqingmoshangmulberry

Chapter 16

"In the end, what are you afraid of?!"

In the noisy magazine office and in front of the chaotic pile of books, I was so busy that I just took a breath and sat down when this sentence came unexpectedly.

I found a pencil from the drawer, and sketched A Fei who was opposite me, laughing at myself, Yu Sangxiao, you are a coward after all.

I remembered Long Feimo's face full of gloom when he said this.After finishing speaking, he left in the dust and left me.

the second time.

I actually remember it so clearly.

I've never been as scared as I am right now.

I am afraid that I will sink little by little.

Ah Fei couldn't wait to look over, and shouted: "Yu Sangxiao, you idiot, I just made the ion iron, why did you draw it into a pile of weeds again?!"

She looked at Liu Wei, the treasure of the township club on the other side of the street. He had the same taste as Andy Lau, but it was not good for her, and she had to keep her tail between her tails as she was always willful.

Two days ago, she sharpened her knife viciously: "Bah - wait until I get it, and see how I deal with him!"

I handed over the sketch and patted her: "Keep it as a souvenir." Seeing each other is less than once.

Fei Ge, who has never shown up, called me, as always cheerful and sunny: "Sang Xiao, long time no see!"

I was shopping in big bags and small bags in the supermarket, and I tried to listen and respond to the noise.Thinking in his heart, the haze of the year didn't seem to have much impact on him, or his brother contributed a lot.In any case, Long Feimo was very competent to his only younger brother.Furthermore, Longfei Pavilion is just an ordinary student who loves to play and make trouble, so it should have nothing to do with the chaos in front of him.

So, I went straight to the place of relying on the old and selling the old: "What do you want me to do?" For that and so for one day, and for that and so and so for the rest of my life.

He also said straightforwardly: "Sang Xiao, it's my birthday today, you haven't forgotten it?" I said "Oh", and he groaned strangely: "Didn't you say anything?"

I struggled to carry a large bottle of laundry detergent of Qiao Zhi's designated brand, and rolled my eyes: "I'm poor, and I don't have time." For a nobleman like him, he definitely belongs to the poor family.Besides, the last time I went to attend his birthday party, it turned out to be the beginning of my entanglement with Long Feimo.Later, Long Feige once apologized hastily to me: "Sang Xiao, I got a little drunk that day and told you that my brother's room was a guest room, are you okay?" His eyes were full of doubts and inquiries.

He is not stupid.

Only I am dumb.

Long Feige ignored my excuses, and reacted very quickly: "You lost the chess game last time, and promised to meet my request." He emphasized, "You are a teacher, you can't lie to me!" I rolled my eyes again Well, he really dared to say that it was not because he was afraid that he would get overwhelmed and deliberately lose him.

He sighed: "Sang Xiao, I haven't seen you for a long time, I miss you so much." Such nasty words can also be said.Knowing that he was mostly putting on a show, I still got goosebumps all over my body.

The two brothers of the Long family are more cunning than the other.

I was not surprised to see Long Feimo at the Long Family's birthday party.

Qin Shan was well-dressed, flaunting everything in a graceful manner, as always, neither humble nor overbearing.I looked at her with a slight sourness in my heart, but it didn't hinder my appreciation for her.

She is truly outstanding.

Long Feimo had no vision.

I look away.His eyes happened to be entangled with mine, and he was slightly taken aback.It seems that Longfei Pavilion is pretending to be smart again.I turned around and saw an accident.

A person who should never show up at this moment, never should whisper to Long Feige intimately and act like no one else.

It turned out to be my cousin Yu Sangmei, whom I hadn't seen for a long time.Only then did I belatedly realize that she and Long Feige were studying at the same level in the same university.

With a chill in my heart, I looked at Long Feimo, who was looking at me, and raised his eyebrows at me clearly, his eyes were still sharp, mocking slightly, and probing deeply with something I didn't understand.

I held back my breath, took a look, and grabbed Sang Mei: "Why did you come here?" Although there was a barrier, they were blood relatives after all, and I couldn't just stand by and watch.

She actually blushed a little on her face: "Today is Fei Ge's birthday." She shook my hand coquettishly as before, "Second Sister, I haven't seen you for a long time, I miss you so much."

I ignored her overly attentive: "Are you familiar with him?" I stared at her.She was furious and stomped her feet: "Second Sister——"

I closed my eyes.Yu Jiajing produced a silly woman, and jumped into the trap one after another.Looking at the appearance of her and Longfei Pavilion Qingqing, I know that the two of them have not been dating for a day or two.

I said blankly, "A lot of things have happened at home recently, don't you know?" She is different from me, she has been the jewel in the palm of her grandparents and even the whole family since she was a child. Although she is innocent, she is definitely not stupid.

I don't believe she is colder than me.

She still looked at me with an innocent look, a little confused: "At home? By the way, grandpa and grandma are not in good health recently." She turned her head to think, still a little casually, "Mom and Dad said I don’t need to take care of anything at home, besides, I’m already 20 years old, and they will send me to study abroad in the second half of the year, and my mother will accompany me.”

I am silent.She is born with a good life, so she can ignore everything and live a happy life.

I was suddenly tired, swallowed the words again, waved to her, and said in a cold tone, "Have fun."

I admit, I'm stingy.

I went upstairs quietly, hesitated for a long time in front of the room I used to live in, then opened the door and walked in.

The room was silent.

It's still the same as when I left, clean and tidy, spotless, I think it's the credit of Mrs. Bai, this peaceful and honest person is extremely hardworking, working like a robot all day long, no wonder Long Feimo ignored her excuses, three Give her a raise twice.

I collected myself, remembered the purpose of this time, walked over to open the cabinet, and prepared to search.

I was stunned.

I didn't expect that the cabinet, which looks perfect on the outside, is so messy inside.

For a long time, I have almost never worn the various clothes displayed in the cabinet, from coats to sweaters to silk pajamas.Something that is expensive and requires a lot of care, not for a weed like me.

Now they are all in pieces, fragmented.It is not difficult to imagine the outrage of the man who destroyed them in the first place.

While I was shocked, I couldn't help being angry.When I was in college, under the unified arrangement of the department, I went to teach primary schools in poor areas for two months, and I saw with my own eyes the hardships of their lives.

Desperate things.

I lowered my head and pushed aside the pile of rags that were no longer clothes.It's here in memory.

Suddenly, a voice behind him said lightly, "Are you looking for this?"

He leaned against the door, and the moonlight cast a soft halo behind him.I couldn't see his face clearly, I just saw him slowly lift a box.

It was the box that Aunt An left for me. I left in a hurry and forgot it here.

He looked at me for a moment, and after a long time: "Are you looking for this box, or..." He raised his other hand and spread out his palm, a pair of crystal teddy bears were in sight.

I looked at him quietly, without saying a word.

He smiled lightly: "Yu Sangxiao, you are so stupid." His palm suddenly tilted, and the pair of bears fell to the ground hard.He approached me step by step, "I cast myself in a trap."

I looked at the pair of broken bears.In my mind, they have long been fragmented.

He leaned slightly, bent down and looked at me: "Why?" He suddenly stretched out his hand and stroked my lips, "Why do you show up again and again for me to see? Why, you just refuse to bow your head for me even once? Why, choose to escape regardless of everything?" He added more force, his voice almost contained a trace of pain and frustration, "Before you didn't care about me as much as I care about you, Yu Sangxiao, how could I let you go ?!"

I looked at him, his strength almost suffocated me, but I was not afraid.

At this moment, even if it is a lie, I believe it.

"Long Feimo," I broke free from him, and said softly, "I'll check on you, I want a divorce, and I ran away far away, all because of..." I lowered my head and tried my best to ignore the pain in my heart. The part is sour and clear, "Because I am selfish and cowardly, I don't want to sink."

I am afraid of taking pain.

He held his breath.

After a long time, I raised my head, and almost at the same moment, I was pulled into his arms forcefully by him, and my lips were instantly blocked tightly.I raised my hand and hugged him back.It must be my hallucination, I actually felt his hand trembling slightly.

After a long time, I gently in his arms: "You saw me, long ago?" I have no memory.

But please give me a reason.

A reason to sink.

He looked down at me, looked deeply into my eyes, and said clearly, "Yes."

I let out a sigh of relief and buried myself in his chest again, motionless.

At this moment, I am willing to sink.

After a long silence, I said, "Please, promise me three things."

He didn't speak, still looked at me, after a long, long time, he nodded.

I met his gaze and said slowly, "First, don't add insult to injury about my father."

I know that my father is under investigation by the judiciary for forging checks.There is no need to get to the bottom of it, if he hadn't been in a hurry to get out of trouble, he would not have fallen into this situation, and he has no one to blame.

own legal justice.

"Second," I looked at him quietly, "All of the Yu family has been swallowed up. I heard that you are recruiting a general manager. In terms of ability, experience, and familiarity, no one can match Sang Tong and You Bo," I said. Literally, "Please, give them a chance to start all over again."

I believe that if they are ambitious enough and work hard enough, sooner or later they will also get back what they lost bit by bit.He Gu of the Yu family is not entrusted by human beings.The Yu family gave birth to me and raised me, no matter what, it is a sacrifice, and I will try my best to pay it back.

There will be no debt from now on.

"Third," I turned and looked out the window, "help me find out the truth about my mother."

His voice came from behind me, calmly: "What else?"

I faced the bright moonlight and said softly, "I'm sorry, I can't make myself very low, very low, all the way down to the dust, but as long as you want to."

The world is like me, and every penny counts. Even in the face of feelings, even if you are tempted, you still want to reserve a way out for yourself, so as not to lose completely.

It's just that even if you fall, even if you are disgusted, even if you lose everything one day.

I don't regret it.

He smiled softly: "Yu Sangxiao, you are a born businessman." He wrapped his hands behind me, "One day, you will understand what it means to be in a cocoon." His lips pressed my skin inch by inch, His voice was low and inaudible, "Like me."

After the operation, Mr. Fang returned to China to recuperate.I went to see him, but I didn't see Sang Tong, and I didn't intend to ask him.She and I are strangers after all.

Teacher Fang was very happy, and entertained me with his sick body in his arms. After greeting me for a while, he smiled slightly: "Sang Xiao, thank you sir for me, and," he said thoughtfully, "I owe you a big favor. "

Almost at the same time, I said: "Okay," I stared at him intently, "Please, please, pay it back now." He was stunned: "Huh?" I still looked at him: "You and my mother Mei Ruotang, what is the relationship?"

His face changed suddenly, looking at me, his eyes were full of pain: "Sang Xiao..."

I bowed my head: "You guys know each other, don't you?" I held back the sourness, "Is the person you paid homage to in England last time...she?"

After all, I couldn't help the moisture in the corners of my eyes.

He didn't answer me right away.

After a long, long time, he finally said: "Yes, Mei Ruotang and I are best friends." His voice was lowered, but full of emotion, "She used to be my landlord, without her, I would not be able to survive the coldness of London. Without her, I would not be able to graduate. Without her, I would not be where I am today. I have never seen any woman who is as talented as her, strong, open-minded, and full of fateful sorrow. She is a strange woman " He said lightly, "She was buried in a cemetery outside London and died of stomach cancer, which is exactly the same as my current illness."

He looked at me, as amiable and calm as ever: "A gentleman promises a thousand gold, I was entrusted by her dying to take care of you. After nearly ten years, she felt guilty that she had not fulfilled her responsibility as a mother and did not allow me to tell the truth. Now, I There is no big difference if you say it or not." He said with a little regret, "Sang Xiao, you have inherited your mother's painting talent, although it is not as high as hers, but from another perspective, it is also a kind of wealth. "

"Talent goes with price."

Long Feimo looked at me from the rearview mirror: "Where are you going this weekend?" I thought for a while: "European Castle." He smiled and said: "Okay."

I looked at him, and in the past month, he said good things more times than I have known him for nearly two years.I never thought that Long Feimo would be so talkative.

The talkative person asked me again: "Have you met Fang Anhang?" I nodded.He gave me a meaningful look: "Sang Xiao, sometimes the truth is crueler than imagined."

I lowered my eyebrows and didn't answer.

He stopped talking.

We spent the whole day in that villa.At dinner time, standing in the kitchen, I opened the overcrowded refrigerator, turned around and looked at him who was sitting at the table with his head bowed and casually browsing the newspaper, waiting for dinner, and asked casually, "What do you want to eat?" Unexpectedly, we would also A day in the trivial life of basic necessities of life like an ordinary couple.

I'm a person whose palms sweat violently when I'm not sure.

He glanced at me: "Huh?" He raised his eyebrows and asked, "What do you want to eat?"

With wet palms, I said, "...well... I'm not particular about food." After a while, I asked again, "What do you want to eat?"

He glanced at me again, with a half-smile: "What can you do?"

I was at a loss for words, and after a long time, I sniffled and said, "...a full meal." The limit between me and Qiao Xun.

There was a slight smile on his lips, he slowly folded the newspaper, stood up, and walked to me step by step.I looked at him vigilantly, retreating like a conditioned reflex, he stretched out his long arms, grabbed me easily, and brought me in front of him: "Now I want to eat more..." He bent his head, and the tip of his nose almost touched me Yes, he said almost solemnly, "...you idiot."

His lips came up naturally.

I turned my head away, greatly embarrassed.After all, my education is different from his. I know that he is mostly joking, but I am still not used to such presumptuous intimacy.

This Long Feimo is really not to be judged by his appearance.

I tiptoed up and got out of bed.

Outside the window, the shadows of trees are slanting, and there is a faint fragrance of flowers in the air.I turned to look at Long Feimo, he was breathing lightly, still sleeping peacefully on his side.It's rare to see him so unguarded and serene.

I thought for a while, and went downstairs to pour water to drink.

After a while, I walked into the garden.

In the center of the garden stands a statue fountain. A curly-haired foreign boy playfully holds a jug, from which the water becomes one spring and three stacks.The moonlight is like a wash, shaded by bamboos, interspersed with the swaying lavender.I looked around randomly until I heard someone ring the doorbell.

It's so late, who could it be?

I opened the door with some doubts, and Qin Shan's face was revealed bit by bit.She looked at me, with a flash of surprise in her eyes: "You?" I nodded, "Hello." She looked inside, not hiding the indifference of her expression and tone: "Is the president there? His phone is turned off all day."

I hesitated for a moment: "...he is sleeping." I looked at her, "Do you want to..."

She has turned around: "No need."

I shrugged, not reluctantly, and prepared to turn around and close the door.I never intend to ask anything between her and Long Feimo.I myself am not a blank slate.

She walked a few steps, but turned around again, with undisguised contempt in her eyes: "Can a marriage through a transaction make you happy?"

I was stunned, looked at her hostile eyes, basked in them slightly, and then replied: "Whether you are happy or not, you know the joys and sorrows yourself, how can outsiders know?"

"In terms of status in the Yu family, in terms of academic qualifications, and in terms of appearance, how can you compare to Yu Sangtong?" She sneered, "A temporary infatuation and novelty don't mean long-term. Do you think you will always be happy? Why?"

I take a deep breath.Since I got married to Long Feimo, her attitude towards me has changed from being polite to being indifferent. As a bridesmaid at the wedding banquet, she never gave me a good look.Just because I don't care about it doesn't mean I don't care about it, just because of the title of Mrs. Long, now I have every reason to put this airs on the shelf and deserve it: "It's better to get along with each other just because of this momentary infatuation and novelty." After many years," I looked at her and said lightly, "I'm not obsessed with it, it's not fresh."

Her expression changed: "Yu Sangxiao, don't talk too much!"

I smiled slightly: "I have such a personality, superficial, snobbish, vain, and report good news but not bad news." I looked at her and calmly said, "If you are destined to come to congratulate us on our golden wedding 50 years later, I will still say the same thing. "

She ignored me and simply turned around and left.

Why should a woman embarrass a woman?

As soon as he walked past the corner of the garden, he bumped into Long Feimo with a sullen expression, "Where have you been?" I told him bluntly, "Qin Shan came to look for you." Not surprisingly.Now that I had fulfilled my duty of notification, I turned to him and prepared to go back to my room.

He stopped me, a little displeased: "Sang Xiao."

I snorted more displeased than him, pushed his hand away, and continued to walk forward.

After walking a few steps, he grabbed me from behind with long hands and long legs, and smiled softly: "Don't worry, as long as you are Mrs. Long, even if I hide my beauty in the golden house, I won't let any woman have a chance to come to you." Show off your power in front of us and demand justice."

Are bad jokes funny?I snorted again, and was about to move forward, but was successfully blocked by his words: "Today is the day when the general manager of Long's Newspaper Group takes office." He smiled slightly, "Sang Xiao, do you know?" Know that there are many people pointing at you behind your back?"

I didn't answer.The grandfather who was hospitalized a while ago went to war and called me over under the pretext of being critically ill. In front of many doctors and nurses, regardless of Youbo's dissuasion, he scolded me, scolded me for being ambitious, turning my elbows outward, being ungrateful, and even my own father Also helpless.After scolding, he was trembling with anger, his face was pale, and he said indiscriminately: "If I had known today, I shouldn't have let Chengbang take you back!"

He is an elder, I respectfully listen to his words, and never remember them.

I am under no obligation to accept responsibility for the mistakes of others.

Long Feimo put his hands in his pockets, looked at the moonlight, and casually said, "Yu Sangtong will not be happy to see me present." He raised his eyebrows slightly, and said pertinently, "She is smarter than your elder brother Yu Youbo and you." , can bend and stretch."

I am silent.She will always be the smartest and most realistic person in the Yu family.

I never thought that I would see He Yanqing again.

On weekends, I sat in the living room with Long Feimo and Long Feige. The TV was on, but we didn't watch it.I am revising the manuscript, Long Feige is studying chess records, and Long Feimo is reading English magazines.

Ever since I learned of the relationship between Sang Mei and Longfei Pavilion, I have remained silent.She is no longer the follower who followed me around since she was a child, she knows what she is doing.

I'm just curious, if my uncles and aunts don't know about it, I have nothing to say, but if they know about it but acquiesce, it will impress me.

This world has always been realistic enough.

It's just that maybe, there will be some people who will carry out their ideals to the end.

While sorting out the manuscript in my hand, I glanced at the person on the TV who was obviously darker and thinner, and was surrounded by Tibetan children with a bright smiling face.Reporters from this city are following him up.In a different environment, he seemed to be much more energetic.

The enthusiasm of the Tibetans, the altitude sickness, the hardships of local life, and the interesting things encountered in practicing medicine are all told by him. He has always been eloquent, simple and neat.

Where there are people, there are gossips. In the end, the lively little reporter said to him persistently: "Doctor He, I heard that you even postponed the engagement ceremony in order to aid Tibet, is it true?"

He didn't answer, just laughed it off.

I picked up the remote control and was about to change the channel when I heard the quick-talking little reporter say, "Doctor He, what do you want to do most in your life?"

I turned around and walked towards the door of the living room, when I heard the voice behind me, after a moment of silence: "I hope that one day, I can go back to Fenglou to play pomegranates again."

I looked at Long Feimo who was looking down at the magazine calmly: "I'll go for a walk."

The night sky is far away, the moon is shining like a wash, the breeze is slightly freezing, and the insects are lingering.I close my eyes and meditate.Maple House?As early as the year I graduated, it was demolished, and the pomegranate tree has long since disappeared.

The courtyard at dusk is desolate and anxious, and the past is sad when I wake up.

I stood motionless for an unknown amount of time, until a voice sounded behind me: "Isn't it cold?" He came over and held my hand, "It's not the time to appreciate the moonlight."

His hands were slightly cold.

He seemed to know everything.

I also didn't expect to meet her.

She stood in a narrow supermarket, holding a little boy about ten years old by the hand: "Hello."

I reluctantly said: "Hello." I don't know how to respond properly.

She bent down and said to the boy who was staring at me, "Huaifan, call me sister." That boy, with the characteristic long eyelashes and slightly sunken eye sockets of the Yu family, was still staring at me, and suddenly smiled "Hello, sister." Facing such a bright smiling face, I could only smile: "Hello." She raised her chin and pointed to that corner: "Can you sit down?"

She first looked at her son who was running around not far away, and then turned to me. She hesitated for a moment: "Can I call you..."

I said lightly, "Whatever you want." It has been at least ten years since I knew this person existed.I looked at her. To be honest, my father had many unspoken affairs, and she was the only one with him who had the longest relationship and gave birth to a son.Even the grandparents knew of her existence, and because they went to visit the grandson secretly and were discovered by the mother, they were furious and made a fuss.

It's not the first time I see her, but every time I see her, I feel sorry for her.In his early thirties, he looks fine, has an elegant temperament, and seems to have a good conversation, but he has stayed in this neither embarrassing nor embarrassing position for more than ten years.

When she noticed my gaze, she showed a trace of embarrassment: "Sang Xiao, I..." She took a deep breath, "...your father..."

I lower my eyebrows.

She stopped, and after a long time, she said in a low voice, "I'm sorry, I know, you look down on me."

I didn't say anything.

After a long time, she breathed a sigh of relief: "It's okay." She looked not far away, and said to herself, "It's already been okay." Her eyes were a little confused.Suddenly I couldn't bear it, I looked at the child who was waving at us and smiling happily: "You..."

"Go to Australia." She said softly, "Today." She looked at me: "Sang Xiao, your father..." After hesitating for a long time, "...not as you imagined..."

She lowered her head: "He said that the longer you grow, the more you look like...we are all..." After another period of silence, she seemed to have deliberated for a long time before making up her mind, "Sang Xiao, your father..."

I looked at the people coming and going in front of me, and said calmly: "Once upon a time, a man went to worship Buddha, and when he arrived at the temple, he found that there was already a man kneeling on the futon, dressed exactly like the Avalokitesvara on the altar. Go, don't step in here."

She was silent until the little boy ran over bouncingly: "Mom, Mom, the time is almost up!"

I watched the two figures, one big and one small, drift away in the endless crowd.To be able to arrange the mother and son in this way, the father did his best.

He was sentenced to six years in prison.I also tried my best.

One cannot be too greedy.

It is better to ask for yourself than for others.

The phone in my pocket rang, I looked at it and answered: "Hello——"

It was that familiar voice: "Sang Xiao, are you outside?"

I raised my eyebrows slightly: "Is there something wrong?"

His voice was unhurried: "Sang Xiao, go back and tidy up your things, let's set off as soon as possible."

I froze for a moment: "Let's go?" Where?

He smiled: "Yes, let's go." He paused, "Go to England." His voice was warm and kind, "My promise."

(End of this chapter)