my weird life.

Chapter 242 The Stove Master, Three Bowls of Rice (22)

A stool is placed in front of the old and the young,

The two of them found a Maza to sit on.

Several plates of pickles were placed on the bench for the following meals.

The dark-skinned, squat, thick-necked old man was holding a large coarse porcelain bowl, and the protruding rice in the bowl was covered with a few large pieces of fat meat—much less meat and vegetables than the Su Wu bowl next to him.

He picked up a piece of fat pork and stuffed it into his mouth,

A few swallows into the stomach,

He hurriedly copied a big chopsticks of rice, stuffed it into his mouth, chewed it a few times with puffed cheeks, and swallowed it whole.

"fragrant!"

The fat old man sighed in admiration.

He glanced at the skinny young man with disheveled hair, not even combed up.

"Master, do you want some more? I have some more here." Su Wu pinched off a piece of meat with chopsticks, and sent a small piece of meat to his belly with big chopsticks, looking very reluctant to eat up the meat.

——Actually, he thinks fat meat is too greasy,
Somewhat difficult to swallow.

But in the eyes of the fat old man, it is natural that poor children are not willing to eat meat, and should cherish and savor it carefully.

Seeing Su Wu push his bowl towards him,
The fat old man shook his head and said, "Let's eat it!

After passing this village, you may not have this shop anymore. If you can eat a good meal today, then hurry up and eat well!
leave me alone! "

As he spoke, he ate his rice sullenly.

When Su Wu heard this, his eyes flickered.

But stopped the chopsticks.

Suddenly said: "Master, do you have anything to tell me?
Sending raw rice to the next village at night, what should I pay attention to? "

"What I should tell you, I told you during the day, and you took it down carefully at the time, why do you want the old man to talk more now?" The fat old man put down the empty big bowl, squinting at Su Wu, "What's the matter?" ?
Seeing the smell of meat,

Suddenly I feel that this life is very good,
Afraid of death again? "

really!

Sending uncooked rice to the next village is extremely unusual in itself.

As a "rice delivery person", my life may be in danger!
This fat old man is not close to the original owner,

There are even some strangers between the two.

But the fat old man who has the food is still willing to share most of the meat with himself—maybe because the matter of "giving rice" is very dangerous, and he may not have a meal after eating this meal, so he pities himself.

He has compassion, which is a good thing for himself.

Su Wu analyzed the fat old man's words in secret, but on the surface he shook his head and said, "I have already agreed to the master, so it is impossible for me not to send rice without fear of death. A promise is worth a lot, I understand!"

The teenager speaks with an accent.

When Su Wu assumed the identity of the original owner, because the simulator covered him up,
It also brought a little accent between his words.

"A promise is worth a thousand dollars...

You wild child, have you heard the story of Ji Bu? "The fat old man smiled, "Forget it!
After all, you are still a child, young at heart,
If the old man tells you, it goes in your left ear and goes out in your right ear—that's normal.

You might as well spend more time talking now,
tell you again...

This time you have to remember!

can't remember
Then this meal will really be your last meal!
Today someone gave a dog to the old man. The dog meat smells delicious——tomorrow if you want to eat dog meat made by the old man, you should remember what the old man said now, understand? "

"Yes, yes!" Su Wu quickly responded, sitting upright.

Unexpectedly, the fat old man watched his movements,

He squinted at him again: "Why put down the bowls and chopsticks? You will have to travel more than 20 miles later to deliver the food to the next village.
Look at your appearance like a hemp stick, a gust of wind can blow you down,
Don't eat more at this time, and you are too hungry to walk on the road, waiting for the trick to pick you up and eat you? "

sly? !

Su Wu originally thought that he would have to make some insinuation,
In order to learn some 'dry goods'.

Unexpectedly, the fat old man casually said the word 'sly'!
What he said was weird,

Is it the kind of weirdness I thought?
Thoughts are spinning in my mind,

Su Wu hurriedly picked up the rice with chopsticks, and stuffed it into his mouth together with the two-knife meat—but at this time, he didn't care about the fat and greasy meat.

Seeing him pawing rice like a piggy,
A heartfelt smile appeared on the fat old man's dark face: "Food is the most important thing for the people, this is the principle of heaven and earth!

Why should I worship the Stove King God Sect and be the 'Stove Master'?
It is because the philosophy of the Kitchen God Sect is the philosophy of ordinary people..."

(Su Wu puts her head down on the rice.)
Just now, the fat old man who was not satisfied with the other party putting down the bowls and chopsticks saw Su Wu focus on cooking rice and ignored himself, so he gave Su Wu a look.
But he didn't say anything more,
Then he said: "Yezhuzi, when you are full, put the food basket on you,

Bring the three bowls of rice from the stove to the trick,
Then go east,
Do you remember these? "

The fat old man stared at Su Wu,
Su Wu ate most of the rice and meat in the bowl, swallowed a mouthful of rice and nodded quickly: "Remember, remember!"

It's strange to remember!
But now the other party repeats the words again,
He did remember it again.

"It seems you haven't forgotten all about it.

Don't look at me, eat and eat! The fat old man lifted his leather apron, took out a copper pipe pot from his arms, picked a pinch of tobacco from the pipe, stuffed it into the pipe and pressed it tightly.

Pull out a wooden pole with sparks,
Heat the smoke pot red.

'click'.

He took a deep puff and exhaled the choking smell of tobacco. Seeing Su Wu looking at the bong in his hand, he handed it to Su Wu: "Take a sip?"

"No, no, no." Su Wu quickly shook his head, "You smoke, you smoke."

He saw the fat old man smoking a pipe pot,
I am speculating in my heart that in this historical period,
It should be late tomorrow.

It was at this time that tobacco became popular.

Holding a cigarette pot, the fat old man squinted his eyes and continued: "These places here are all connected by roads. Once you are on the road, just go east with all your heart.

Don't stop in the middle.

this way,

You will first pass a place called Mantou Mountain.

It is said to be Mantou Mountain, but in fact that place is not a good place to grow crops and produce food.

It is a big grave circle!
The graves stood there one by one, like steamed buns.

remember,
When walking on Mantou Mountain,
You may see that the mountain does not seem to be a mountain,
You will feel that this place is different from what you thought, and at this time, you will pick up the first bowl of 'paving rice'—"

The fat old man pointed at the bowl of uncooked rice on the far left on the stove with his cigarette pot: "I have marked you, and there is a circle drawn on the bowl containing the paving rice, just look for it.

You grab this paving rice,

Throw it around like paper money,

While spouting, I want to curse at the same time - into your old lady's hair, you donkey, fuck these dirty words,
Cough cough... In short, you can scold how dirty you are,
When you finish spreading the rice,
It is estimated that we will be able to see the real Mantou Mountain, don't stay, just go. "

"I remember." Su Wu said solemnly.

"Down the Mantou Mountain,

After passing through a short forest, there is the theater platform ahead.

on the stage,

You may encounter three situations.

The first type is the dark lights in the empty field, who can't see anything.

This is a good thing, you can just leave when the time comes.

The second type is that a stage is set up over there, and if there is an actor in red on the stage, waving at you and waving his sleeves, please come on stage—don’t look at her beautiful paintings, just be confused. Follow up!

In such a situation, quickly unbutton the waistband of your trousers, urinate on the stage,
Turn around and run!
Generally, after five or six hundred steps, you will be fine.

The third type, there will also be a stage,

However, an old monk will appear on the stage, sitting on the stage and reciting scriptures.

At this time, you pretend to be crazy and stupid, put the second bowl of rice "wine rice" into your mouth, and spray it on the table continuously,

When did you spray down the table,

You can continue on your way.

The two circles drawn on the bowl are wine rice. "

"Okay." Su Wu took the last bite of his meal.

The fat old man looked at the greasy bottom of the bowl with not a grain of rice left, nodded in satisfaction, took his last puff of cigarette, tapped the pipe pot on the sole of his shoe, and said, "Passing through the two places of Mantou Mountain and Xitaiping, ,
Nothing more.

You will walk all the way to 'Tan Family Village'.

In front of the wooden archway in Tanjia Village,

put the rice down

Put a handful of incense on the rice.

Just find a corner with a leeward wind and sleep there overnight.

Someone might ask you something in the middle,

No matter what you ask, you don't answer.

When the sun rises,

Look at the bowl of uncooked rice under the archway. Is it moldy or has it turned rancid?
Weigh it with your hands,

Heavy or light?

Just write it down and come back and let me know.

It will be broad daylight when I come back,

You don’t have to worry about the opera platform and the steamed bun mountain, just walk all the way! "

Su Wu kept the fat old man's instructions in mind,
But I couldn't help being confused,
Asked the fat old man: "Master, you know these things much better than me. Wouldn't it be better for you to go than me?"

"What a fart!"

The fat old man rolled his eyes: "I'm going to deliver rice,
Are you burning the stove here?
Or are you brave enough to feed the ghost who spends the night and tell him not to go in the direction of Tanjia Village? "

stove...

Feed the trick...

Su Wu looked at the three-eyed firewood stove, and felt that the firelight was vaguely familiar—it seemed to him in the small temple that he used to use as a stronghold in the urban area of ​​Mingzhou, the kind of firelight brought him the feeling,
But there are many subtle differences between the two...

After deliberating, he asked the fat old man: "Master, do you want to eat too?"

The fat old man turned his head and stared at him: "Nonsense!
If you don't eat, won't our Stove King Sect have no food to eat?
This stick of incense is almost burnt out,
As soon as it burns out, you're on your way!
Otherwise, the old man will have no time to greet you when crossing tricks come later—then your life or death at that time depends entirely on your luck! "

talking,
The fat old man turned around again,

Looking at Su Wu's face: "But having said that, you piggy don't seem to be afraid of these at all?

Fake, or real?
If you are not afraid, then it is a good seedling. "

He called Su Wu a 'wild boar' and a 'pig' in his mouth, but he didn't necessarily mean to belittle Su Wu.
These cheap names,
It is precisely to allow young people to grow up safely.

Su Wu scratched his head and smiled.

Standing up, he said, "Then I'll carry the basket on my back, and let's go, master."

(End of this chapter)