The Nth Disappearance of My Wife

Inscription: Have you ever had an experience that you really liked but died without a cause?Do you still suddenly think of someone in the dead of night, but you can’t remember her appearance clearly? It’s been many years, let’s look back and say goodbye to those people we liked in childhood.

Tian Xiaoxiao said: "Lin Muxing, let me go with you, wait for me!"

Go to a place to meet someone who I liked earlier than Tian Xiaoxiao. I haven’t seen her for so many years and I don’t know. How is she doing?Still remember me?

Lin Muxing's previous name was: Lin Xiahua, but later my family disliked being too girly and changed my name to Lin Muxing, so I changed from a flower to a Jupiter.

1. Flowers and leaves

I don't know why I keep thinking of a person all of a sudden recently. That person is related to my past, my birth, and my past.

I was born in a small town called Qingshi, which has a nickname called Qingshi Ancient Town.

The ancient town is full of simplicity and leisure, where there are Yi's favorite flowers and my favorite Yi.After passing through the ancient town, the Iraqi people have not returned, and the old people are heartbroken by memories.Yi, do you remember the memory I wrote for you, there are two naughty little ghosts on the other side of the mountain, that is us.

At that time, I was only a few years old. When I was young, my emotions were always very simple.

Yi Wuxie, I am naive.Time passed by our past in a hurry, and the years passed by the contours of our faces, showing maturity. I once stayed in the ancient town of my hometown for more than a year, and met you at that time.

Green mountains and green waters, flowers and moons, remember that you love the unknown little wild flowers in the mountain trails the most, the flowers bloomed and faded that year, and the children love the crisp sound of ticking on the bluestone boards in the ancient town, the old people like it The tranquility in the ancient town, you like that unknown little flower.

You always like to ask me the name of that flower, but I don't know, so I can only perfunctorily say: "I will tell you when I know."

"Okay, then you are not allowed to go back on your word." You said very seriously.

In fact, I don't know when I learned the name of that flower. I thought it was perfunctory and funny, but you believed it.

Occasionally, you will also say that you like to stay with me, but at that time we were too young to understand feelings. Maybe it's not that we are too young but we are not capable of bearing a relationship.

An old scholar who stayed abroad in the Qing Dynasty in the ancient town said that one of us is like summer and the other is like autumn, life is as gorgeous as summer flowers and death is as quiet and beautiful as autumn leaves.

You are my autumn leaves, quiet, melancholy and shy.You say that I am your summer flower, because you like flowers and you like me.

At that time, we played with a puppet for more than half a year, so that we could share a piece of cake together. Is this considered childhood sweetheart?What about childhood sweethearts?We can always turn the cold winter into the warmth of spring. At that time, we never thought that we would leave each other one day, nor did we believe that anyone between us would leave suddenly.

2. Unknown flower name.
That day, the sky was clear and the sun was so bright that people couldn't open their eyes. It was a sign of summer.

Ask me after watching an idol drama.

"Xiaohua, do you like me?"

"Well, I like being with Xiaoye the most."

I answered like this after watching the idol drama.

"Me too! Then let's never separate."

Just like the plots in idol dramas.

You like Disney princesses, then I like princes, I secretly made up my mind at that time.

But still separated, I was the first to leave.An apple may be whole at the beginning, but it will be divided into two halves once it encounters a fruit knife. Many things are fruit knives between us, such as misunderstandings, suspicions, or transfers, and distance.

But in the end, it is time that makes us leave—it started with you when we were young, hurt by longing, and destroyed by time.

The reason for leaving is my mother. My mother wanted me to go to the city center to study in elementary school, but your mother insisted on letting you stay in the small town.

Later, I met Tian Xiaoxiao. I never thought that since I would grow up with her in the days to come, I never thought that my childhood sweetheart would be Tian Xiaoxiao.

Xiaoye, when you knew I was leaving, you cried for a long time, and you said to me with swollen eyes, "Xia Hua, will you come back? Will you forget me?" With a small face, she said in a childish voice, "Of course, Qiuye, you must miss me."

Even when I was leaving, I still thought that I would come back, and I think you also believed that I would come back, because you gave me a promised flower.

What do I know when I just graduated from kindergarten, how could I say such a thing?
I was surprised at the beginning, but you ignored me in the last few days, and heard from your mother that you went to pick flowers with your aunt, saying that you were going to give it to me as a gift—so that I would not forget you.

At that time, I thought you must want me to look at the flowers, know the names of the flowers and then come back and tell you.It must be, but you said that flowers are an agreement.

You spent a lot of hard work and finally picked the flower. When I saw you, your clothes were covered with thorns, your body was soaked in sweat, and your hair was disheveled.

I've never seen such a messy look like you who always love to be tidy.

You tear the flowers into pieces and put them in a little blue bag and hand them to me.Unfamiliar flowers have an unknown faint floral fragrance. The flowers are not gorgeous, elegant and refined, and the residual flowers are a little yellowish. This is probably the so-called only fragrance as before - I have never heard the name of the flower, but I know its meaning .

I left, but I never thought that I would never look back after turning around. When I left, I was so reluctant and unbearable, but I still left.

It was so decisive and so helpless and painful to go.

Just like that, I left you, my childhood, I don’t have you anymore, I’m not what I used to be...

Later Lin Xiahua also became Lin Muxing, he never forgot you, even if he later met Tian Xiaoxiao who might be his real favorite, Qiuye was still the cinnabar mole in his heart.

But I didn't have a chance to tell Ye.

3. Substitution.
"Unhappy, brother Mu Xing, why are you always so stern." The one who spoke was Tian Xiaoxiao, the girl I like now, she is very beautiful and I like her, even if she doesn't like me for many years.

I liked her at first because she looked like a girl I liked before.The girl that day was Akiba.

"Sister Xiaoxiao, can you sing for me?"

Tian Xiaoxiao knew that I liked her singing voice, and immediately sang a song for me.She said the song was called "I miss you so much" and I listened carefully to her singing.

I miss you too, Yeh.

"Brother Mu Xing, don't go!" After listening to Tian Xiaoxiao's song, I put Tian Xiaoxiao aside and went home by myself.Tian Xiaoxiao was still behind me, calling my name: "Lin Muxing, Lin Muxing."

I knew that Tian Xiaoxiao was crying because I heard her sobbing, and I even knew that she fell in embarrassment when she was chasing me.

"Brother Mu Xing... what's wrong with you?" Tian Xiaoxiao hoped that I could take a look at her, and then I glanced at her, but I didn't remember the look.

I bought a bottle of beer by myself, who knows the helplessness of drinking it all in one gulp?The sad Tian Xiaoxiao, and the helpless me, Tian Xiaoxiao and I are both very far away from the person we like... so far away that we can't reach the clouds.

Tian Xiaoxiao didn't understand the sadness that suddenly appeared in my eyebrows and eyes, and he didn't understand why I was easily sentimental.

4. Departure.
If we still have if, can I tell you the name of the flower?Ye, I miss you so much, ha ha.

Seeing me drinking, my mother smiled bitterly and said, "Lin Muxing, how did you learn to drink?" Mother must be very disappointed, right?The son she brought up with one hand is so disappointing. In order to let him go to the best school, he dragged me out of the ancient town in spite of everyone's opposition.

"I'm sorry, Mom." "You don't have to say sorry, you can do whatever you like when you grow up, and Mom won't force you." "Mom, I miss her..." With the strength of alcohol, I almost cried .

"Who do you miss?" "Ye! It's the autumn leaf in the town where we used to live in primary school." "You still miss her after so long? I thought you forgot her." "Well... Mom, you know her... ...Where is it?" Mother shook her head helplessly, but he couldn't help it, he hasn't been back to his hometown, ancient town, for so many years.

After my repeated insistence, my mother couldn't persuade me and could only let me go. Since I committed suicide that time, my mother has followed me in everything.

On the eve of my going to the ancient town, Tian Xiaoxiao stopped me.

"Brother Mu Xing, I'm going to sing the song on stage at that time. It was written to me by your captain Mu Yixuan." Tian Xiaoxiao looked very happy.

"Okay, I'll be listening then, I still have something to do." I said perfunctorily, because I really didn't want to get entangled with Tian Xiaoxiao.

Tian Xiaoxiao cared about me and said, "Brother Mu Xing, why are you leaving? Why are you so pale? You've been in a bad mood for the past few days. Is something wrong at home? Auntie, is she in good health?" Xiaoxiao knows that I am a single-parent family and that my mother is in poor health.

Since I think she is annoying, I like her but sometimes I don't want her to intervene in my past, but she still intervenes.I like her like I used to like Qiuye without hesitation, even though Tian Xiaoxiao has always regarded me as a younger brother.

"Sister Xiaoxiao, can you leave me alone now? You will really annoy me if you act like this." I actually didn't speak nicely to her.

"Lin Muxing... I'm sorry, I didn't mean it." Tian Xiaoxiao lowered her head and pursed her lips. She wanted to get involved with me, but she didn't expect me to be impatient.

I know that Tian Xiaoxiao can always understand everything about her with one look, but Tian Xiaoxiao can't see through me, but I still stay by her side like a fool.

She also deserves my kindness to her. Tian Xiaoxiao even said when I was angry and cried: "Brother Mu Xing, I know you are annoying me now, but you must tell me if you are unhappy. I just want to let you You are happy." Such words.

This time it was still the same, Tian Xiaoxiao cried again, crying, "I'm sorry... Brother Mu Xing, I seem to have made you angry again, I didn't mean it."

I don't know why she likes to cry so much in front of me recently, obviously she wasn't like this before.

The lonely street lamp illuminates my lonely back, I want to go back to the ancient town alone, and I want to meet the autumn leaves that make me dream.

"Brother Mu Xing! I'll go with you." Tian Xiaoxiao followed me with her luggage on her back. She was determined to follow me all the way. I knew she was worried that I would not be safe alone.

On the journey, in addition to the luggage I should bring, I also brought a bag of dried flowers that Ye gave me back then.I haven't seen her for more than ten years, and haven't returned for more than ten years. I don't know how she is.