my monster girlfriends

This kind of son, although he is easy to shy, has a thick pocket, so he can fool around as a "comer" to make you happy, not to mention covering your expenses tonight, but covering your expenses this year...

It's a pity that she was born as a daughter. If she were a man, she would definitely be able to achieve a great career with her eloquence...

At this point, it's time to introduce... This girl's name is Zhang Yan, from Xingji, her father is a student of Tai Academy, the highest institution in Ming Dynasty, and her mother, Jin, is quite good at marketing. When she was born, the former said to outsiders that the day before yesterday At night, she dreamed that the moon ran into her stomach... According to this theory, it should not be Chang'e in her stomach, but a tengu.

However, in this day and age, this kind of marketing is still very popular. Zhang Yan herself is reliable enough. She is well-known for her piano, chess, calligraphy, calligraphy, and knowledge. , the queen needs to be screened from civilians, and Zhang Yan just meets this requirement.

Because of this, Zhang Yan's recent life has not been easy...

In those days, the matter of "choosing a concubine" was much more valuable than our "beauty pageants". In the latter, you just need to keep in shape, hide your plastic surgery experience, and sleep with a few referees, and you can get a good one. Of course, if you can change your personality, or your eyes are as small as slits, it is enough to go up and call for world peace.

But choosing a concubine is different. Choosing a concubine is not aimed at the emperor, at least it is also the future emperor. In addition to the rigid conditions of appearance, you have to cultivate many hobbies, have enough fame, clean yourself, and have a certain relationship in the court... ...That's all, it depends on the emperor's mood. If you are selected, you will have a wealth of wealth and go to heaven. If you are not selected, it is all useless.If you dare to send some transsexuals or Kunlun slaves in the palace, you will be dragged out and chopped down.

It's just that the family's hopes are high, but Zhang Yan herself lacks interest... For a lively girl like her, it is already filial piety to be able to practice piano, chess, calligraphy and painting. Look at the filial piety on her chest. It's so huge, it's so big that it sucks the nutrition out of the chest...cough.

Well, this is also the reason why she disguised herself as a man so far without any flaws...

As for being a princess, showing off in front of a strange man... She has no enthusiasm at all, and she also wants to relax when she comes here to play today.

Fortunately, today's good luck has diluted the unhappiness. Not long after I arrived, I was taken advantage of.

However, if you want the other party to take over the work of "being taken advantage of" with peace of mind, it depends on her operation...

Walk to the end of the world with my beloved: NO.26 This fate has not ended

To make a person believe in you and be willing to spend money for you, first of all, make him feel "worth it".

In later generations, this method has been thoroughly researched by many businesses, and many women have used what they have learned, and used it to raise spare tires. It is hinting that the spare tires should spend money...

If Zhang Yan was wearing the girl's attire at this time, she would not need to speak much, just a look and a smile, and a lot of young men are willing to pay for her; but...she is a man now.

Well, in fact, men can also use their appearance to get the son to pay money, but this is not within the scope of our discussion...

So... it takes skill.

And see, Zhang Yan pulled Zhu Youtang aside, found a seat and sat down, looked around exaggeratedly, and then put out a picture of "I'll tell you a secret, don't let it out" expression:

"Brother... is this your first time here?"

According to Zhang Yan's experience, after she said this, the other person would definitely deny it with a blushing face... There is a strange phenomenon that has existed since ancient times, that is, men always like to pretend to be "experienced", while women Always like to pretend to be "innocent".

Of course...

"That's right." Zhu Youtang nodded, "My family is quite strict, so I have a chance today, so I'll come out and have a look."

Zhang Yan: "..."

My son, you don't play your cards according to the routine... are you so open-minded?

According to the above law, your words are equivalent to a girl saying: "You are the No. 11 rich man I caught"!

Fortunately, she had also been confused before, and after a pause of about half a second, she put on an expression of "I knew it" very naturally.

"Hehe...that's right." She casually forgot to glance in the direction of the bustard, "The bustard, it's you who cheated."

After a pause, he continued: "Brother, it's so-called no business, no adultery, look at that old bustard, with oily hair and pink face, narrow eyes and thin lips, judging by his face, he is not engaged in any serious business..."

Zhu Youtang secretly complained: Nonsense, she is already a bustard, how many more unscrupulous businesses are there than her?Turtle?

Zhang Yan continued: "...a person like you, even if you put on an experienced appearance, you will definitely be spotted by that cunning old lady..."

Zhu Youtang was amused in his heart, but he asked cooperatively: "So that's the case...but what can it do?"

"Hehe... so what?" Zhang Yan smiled jokingly, "Brother, let me ask you... Do you understand the rules of this court? Do you understand the 'pricing' of this nobleman?"

I get it, I get it all the time... Qin Chu Qi Yan Zhao Wei Han has basically been there...

She was not ready to ask Zhu Youtang to speak, so she continued: "I'll ask you again... If you don't understand, then if the procuress finds you a prostitute casually, she will tell you that this is what our brothel does not open to the public. Qingyuan people, ordinary people have no chance to meet each other, but today they fell in love with you at first sight, and begged me in every possible way, just to relieve the pain of lovesickness... Do you believe it or not?"

... Not to mention, the process she said is really useful, even in later generations, some people will be deceived by the routine of "she rejects others for thousands of miles, but just has a crush on you", which is relatively not so sinister in this person's heart In the [-]s, the effect must have been quite good.

Zhu Youtang looked surprised: "...Of course I believe it."

At the same time, he complained in his heart: Compared with this, I am more curious, how come you are so familiar with this process... Is your ideal career a bustard?

Hearing this, Zhang Yan was secretly delighted, and after muttering, "Fudge succeeded", she smiled slightly, "Fortunately...you met me."

Zhu Youtang thought to himself: What's so lucky?No matter how cunning and cunning her procuress is, she can cheat me a little money at most, but she doesn't dare to go too far by looking at my clothes...Compared with you, a stranger who has no status and no status, and is even a stranger disguised as a man is more suspicious, okay? ?

…No matter what he thought in his heart, on the surface, Zhu Youtang said in a very cooperative way: "Thank you, brother."

"Hey, don't be polite, don't be polite." Zhang Yan waved her hand, "When you go out, you shovel grievances, and you make friends. Everyone is a man. It's an honor to meet a gentleman...it should be."

Leaving aside the fallacy of what you said about "friends"... I just ask are you a man?If you are not convinced, go to the toilet and take it off for verification?Since we are friends, it's okay to make an appointment to go to the toilet together and wait and see what happens, right?

... Well, no matter how much Zhu Youtang has the demeanor of a Confucian monarch in the palace, he is still a very playful dragon at heart... It is not so easy to suppress the skill of a thousand years.

After that, Zhang Yan had to make an inch of it, and used the words of "friends" to bring up a nobleman for Zhu Youtang... The wording includes but is not limited to the following—

"...Then what Qin Yuqiong advertised to the outside world was that a young man lost his father and was living in a homeless state. He used a music girl who is proficient in rhythm... In fact, she only knows how to play this song, and she still memorizes it by rote. If you want her to speak, I'm afraid It’s like killing a pig.”

"...This person named Luo Xue'er is known as 'Poetry and Poetry'. In fact, the poem she wrote on the night she became famous was given by a poor scholar, but it was just named after her, which is actually plagiarism...Famous After that, the scholar disappeared, so you can see that she didn't publish poems for a long time, and occasionally, they were bought secretly by the store for publicity... Oh, you really are not a son of man."

...Probably, that's it.

"...Brother." Zhu Youtang squinted at the past, "Dare to ask...how did you know this news?" After a pause, "Could it be...you were the guest of honor?"

Hearing this, Zhang Yan smiled awkwardly: "Cough, hearsay, hearsay..."

This news is indeed derived from hearsay, but... once, she was playing soy sauce in the audience behind the men's clothing, and heard the so-called "sound of nature" song, based on the professional habits of a real talented woman, she made a random comment... ...Then, inexplicably, he was selected as the "guest of the curtain".

Please note that the "curtain" here can refer to "bed curtain"...

We can imagine the embarrassment and liver pain when a girl like her was invited to the boudoir... That girl was not even as beautiful as herself.

She quickly changed the subject, and Zhu Youtang sat aside, listening with interest.

In fact, these gossips may be worth listening to others, but to Zhu Youtang, they are not very interesting in themselves.

However, it would be very interesting if these news about the brothel were told by a girl disguised as a man...

The sun and the moon turn, the song ends, and at night, although there are many customers who can stay overnight, and the brothel is essentially a place to "add some color to the stay", but look at these two, a woman disguised as a man, it is intentional, There is no tool; the other is from the royal family, he is a prince, if he does not return at night, the guards next to him may be killed... So, he should go.

"Brother, see you by fate."

Perhaps it was because Zhu Youtang generously covered all of Zhang Yan's expenses, and the latter handed over Zhang Yan's hand, and under the moonlight, she showed a sincere and beautiful smile to the former—this is normal, if you meet a generous Jin Lord, you smile more than she does.

"Yeah." Zhu Youtang also smiled lightly, he had a very interesting day, "See you by fate."

The so-called friendship between gentlemen is precious because it is "light as water". If the friendship is deep, there may be entanglement of interests.

At this moment, under the moonlight, both of you think so... This kind of mood is probably similar to when you are matched with a teammate who has a good chat online, with joy and sadness.

At least they can still maintain this state of mind before the crown prince chooses a concubine...

Walk to the end of the world with my beloved: NO.27 This story comes from meeting

It is a big deal for a prince to choose a concubine.

In a sense... bigger than the emperor's choice of concubine.

The reason is quite simple... These days, when the emperor chooses concubines, he basically chooses "concubines", like Wei Zifu, who goes to serve and change clothes after being favored by the emperor, and becomes the queen after he is appointed. After all, it is a minority. Appearance, figure, luck, skills, all of which are indispensable... In the business of "queen", basically everyone started as a "princess".

So... Zhu Youtang is very clear that for such a "big event", it will take half a year to a year for the pre-preposition (an order to stop all marriages and wait for the selection of concubines), and then go through layers of screening... ...However, that is the work of the old maids and eunuchs, and has nothing to do with him.

Well, this is a very magical phenomenon. The selection process of his future wife has nothing to do with him.

But if you think about it carefully, besides the formal meeting, many blind dates in modern times have nothing to do with me... Well, this thing actually has a historical origin.

Closer to home.

The previous ones, "body", "skin marks", "appearance", "manners", "etiquette", all kinds, really don't need to be screened by Zhu Youtang himself, but... this last step, from the 50 people selected , choose three, and choose the queen from the three, he has to come himself.

In fact, normally speaking, this is the second-to-last step. In the past, the emperor's empress dowager or concubine used to be the referee for "choose three from fifty", but... at this time, the noble concubine surnamed Wan has already passed away. It's because she has more breath and less breath, and she will die without notice in time. Naturally, it's not her turn to do this.

Furthermore, for Zhu Youtang, "dragon is fine and tiger is fierce" is not an adjective... His dragon itself is more casual, if he is in a good mood, he will accept all fifty, except that it will cause some criticism, physically No problem at all.

Therefore, as an old pervert from ancient times to the present, Zhu Youtang is still very interested in this selection...

And when he arrived at the scene... a scene more interesting than the above-mentioned interests was placed in front of him.

......

Zhang Yan was very upset at this time.

As mentioned earlier, most of the selection process has nothing to do with the prince himself, but...it is certainly impossible to have nothing to do with the girls who were screened.

Auditions have been like this from ancient times to the present. Contestants pay out of their own pockets for the illusory position, while the referee only needs to sit on the stage and say "yes" or "no". Even the quota is set by default, if you don't pay enough, you can only see the contestant who sings like a butcher advances to the top position in the referee's evaluation of "your voice makes me shake my soul"...

Of course, Zhang Yan's displeasure was not because of this...

The main reason is that the process of choosing a concubine is really too cumbersome. There are so many steps, such as measuring body, looking at appearance, this and that, like chasing a girlfriend.

This is not a big deal, what makes her collapse even more is that every time she goes through a round with the idea of ​​"I can go home and sleep after choosing this item, and never have anything to do with that dog emperor", over there again There will be news that she has advanced...

In this way, round after round, in the end, she simply gave up resisting, and the only thought that supported her was... "I want to see how many rounds I can get in this way."

Then, she was selected among the last 50 people...

...Dad, you must have stuffed money, Dad!Was our family so rich?

......

When Zhu Youtang walked to the "audition venue", he saw Zhang Yan at first sight.

It's not just because they know each other... After all, as we said, Zhu Youtang is a very casual dragon, and being casual means that he won't deliberately remember certain things.

The problem is that among the fifty beautiful girls present, the rest of them either secretly looked at him with some kind of fiery and courteous eyes, and the meaning in their eyes was probably "wow, this prince is so handsome, he earned it" or " Choose me! Choose me! My old lady is going to reach the pinnacle of her life today!"; or Xiaojiabiyu type, with her head bowed and blushing, not daring to look at this side; no matter how bad...they have a calm demeanor, neither humble nor overbearing, quite everyone's demeanor .

But what about Zhang Yan...

At this time, she lowered her head, drooped her eyelids, curled her mouth, and had an expression of "Oh, life is so tiring, I'm so sleepy, let's end it soon"... Putting it in the team of fifty beautiful girls, it feels like Like a little salty fish among 49 white swans.

This expression even made Zhu Youtang subconsciously look at his clothes... What's wrong, did you feel wronged by marrying me?

This "interesting" feeling instantly overwhelmed Zhu Youtang's thousand-year-old lustful heart.

He pursed his lips, and amidst many expectant eyes, he walked straight to the girl who was already a salted fish.

"Brother." He cupped his hands, "Long time no see."

After saying this, the eunuchs next to him were all shocked--I'm going to go, is it possible that this man is actually a man even though he looks so beautiful?Its gender has been blurred to such an extent that those old maids who have inspected the skin of the candidate concubine inch by inch can't tell it! ?

——At this moment, Zhang Yan, who lowered her head and complained about herself, had no sense of reality at all, because she never thought that the words were said to herself—ah, the voice is so close, it must be the person next to me...

I can't just be promoted to be a noble concubine or queen like this, right?That's too magical... isn't it?

She didn't respond, and Zhu Youtang was not in a hurry... Waved his hand to make those attendants who tried to arrest him with "crime of rudeness" step back, and then just waited.

Wait patiently, wait with a smile.

After about two or three breaths... Zhang Yan finally came to his senses and raised his head: "...Eh, call me?"

With an uncontrollable smile, Zhu Youtang said, "Is there anyone here who I can call 'Xiongtai'?"

He paused for two seconds, "As far as I know, you seem to be the only one who has ever disguised herself as a man."

He paused for two seconds, and the eunuchs were almost running out... They thought this girl was really a man.

Zhang Yan asked subconsciously:

"How do you know..."

The voice suddenly stopped.

She first took a short breath to go up and down, looking at Zhu Youtang's face and the prince's clothes on him carefully;

After that, he took another breath and looked at the surrounding environment, as if confirming something;

In the end...it took three breaths of time to succeed, and to recognize a certain reality.

"Heh, hehe..."

At this moment, Zhang Yan's mood was broken...

You dignified prince, you don't go to so many places... Do you have to go to the brothel to harm me!Are you free?

She smiled dryly, and asked cautiously in a tentative tone: "... If I say that this was actually an accident... would you believe it?"

"I believe it." Zhu Youtang smiled, "I don't believe that a woman who can disguise herself as a man and go to a brothel has an escaped personality, and she will be willing to go through so many steps to become a queen."

The black history was exposed in public, Zhang Yan's smile was slightly ugly, and her voice was even crying, "Then... I'm going home now, you can pretend you haven't seen me, is that okay?"

When she said this, she also looked at some people who looked over with the expression of "how dare you say that".