This director only makes bad movies

"so short."

Lin Ziyi muttered.

The progress bar on the screen showed that the length of the first episode was only four and a half minutes, which was simply too short.

Xu Nan smiled slightly and said nothing.

"Never Expected" is like this. One episode only lasts a few minutes. It's short, fast, and has no nutrition. What it pursues is nonsensical and funny.

The progress bar on the screen continues to move forward.

"This episode is sponsored by No One."

"Is anyone sponsoring us? No one is sponsoring us. Is anyone sponsoring us? No one is sponsoring us."

Lin Ziyi's eyes widened in shock.

What's going on?

Then dense white characters appeared on the screen, but before Lin Ziyi could see clearly, these white characters flashed by and the official plot began.

Lin Ziyi felt very uncomfortable instantly.

Many people have obsessive-compulsive disorder. If they don't understand a line in a TV series, they have to go back and understand it, otherwise they feel like something is wrong.

Lin Ziyi is such a person. She was very unhappy because she didn't see the row of words clearly.

So she decisively picked up the remote control and clicked pause, rewinding the progress bar, making sure to see clearly what was written on the screen just now.

"Is it as hot as a dog? It's a hot dog, woof woof woof."

"The crew's lunches are so delicious that you will definitely die if you don't eat them."

"Everyone says my photography sucks because they don't understand appreciation."

"This is a short play. I never expected it."

"What the hell?"

Lin Ziyi couldn't help but complain after reading it.

This seems to be all nonsense, why is there such meaningless content on the screen?

Lin Ziyi couldn't help but look at Xu Nan strangely, wondering what was in his mind and why he added a bunch of meaningless nonsense to the short play.

Why is the brain circuit so unusual?

Xu Nan smiled.

In fact, this is the expression of nonsense. The true meaning of nonsense is that there is no reason, no reason.

Who says TV dramas can't suddenly have a screen full of nonsense?

And don't look at it as some nonsense. It is estimated that after the broadcast, there will be many patients with obsessive-compulsive disorder like Lin Ziyi. They must pull the progress bar to the nonsense place to see this line clearly.

Because that's what he did in the first place.

Lin Ziyi clicked play and let the skit continue.

In the center of the screen, a man appeared with his mouth slightly open and a dumbfounded look.

"This protagonist looks so stupid." Lin Ziyi complained unceremoniously.

Voice-over sounds.

"My name is Wang Dachui. I am an actor and I am starring in a low-budget martial arts drama."

The screen zoomed out, and a rough-looking toy sword appeared in Wang Dachui's hand. He turned to look at the toy sword.

The voice-over began to complain mercilessly: "This is too low-cost. Children's toy swords are the best."

Lin Ziyi opened her eyes strangely.

At this moment, the toy sword flashed a cold light and made a "bin" sound. Lin Ziyi was no stranger to this sound. It was the sound of weapons rubbing together in movies and TV dramas.

It's just that the swords that make this kind of sound in other movies and TV shows are all swords from magic weapons. No matter how bad they are, they are relatively normal-looking swords. A toy sword makes a friction sound that only magic weapons can make, and there is an inexplicable sense of joy.

The voice-over continued to complain: "You are already so good at this quality and yet you are so unlucky."

The toy sword made continuous friction sounds, and the sword's cold light flashed continuously.

Voice-over: "You are still not convinced that your quality is poor."

Lin Ziyi was speechless, but felt funny for no reason.

At this moment, another character jumped out, looking just as stupid as Wang Dachui.

He had the stereotypical laugh of a movie or TV villain.

"Hahaha."

"If you want to rescue the princess, then"

"At once"

"At once"

The actor's lines actually got stuck.

Wang Dachui shook his head feebly.

"Please memorize the lines before you come up with it. Shouldn't the crew's requirements be so low?"

The villain actor shouted: "Come on, use your special move, Nine Yang Divine Fist."

Wang Dachui's eyes widened in surprise, but because he was so stupid, his expression looked like that of a fool, and he had an inexplicable sense of joy.

He threw away the toy sword in his hand without mercy.

Voice-over: "It turns out that I am using a boxing technique, the Nine-Yang Divine Fist. It sounds ridiculous."

Wang Dachui stretched out his fists, and strange special effects appeared on the screen.

Voice-over: "I felt a powerful force converging on my fists. My left fist was as hot as fire, and my left fist was as cold as frost."

On the screen, Wang Dachui looked solemn, and the villain actor looked horrified.

Coupled with the previous lines, Lin Ziyi instinctively had a little more expectation in her heart, feeling that a fierce fight was just around the corner.

But the next second, four words appeared on Wang Dachui's left and right fists, which were blue frost special effects and red flame special effects.

You read that right, it’s not special effects, but four words, frost special effects and fire special effects, are printed on Wang Dachui’s fist.

Seeing this scene, Wang Dachui, who had been keeping his lips tightly shut and just complaining in his heart, couldn't help it anymore and started to complain.

"I'm so tired. I didn't even do any special effects. It's too perfunctory to just type."

Seeing this scene, Lin Ziyi couldn't hold back any longer and started laughing continuously like a goose.

"Hehehehehe, what is this, what is this?"

Lin Ziyi no longer knew what to say. This was the first time she had seen such an outrageous and shocking plot. She was so shocked that she was charred on the outside and tender on the inside, and her belly was shaking when she laughed.

The villain looked horrified.

"It's actually the Nine Heavens of Fire and Ice of Nine Sun Divine Fist."

Wang Dachui looked helpless: "Hey, how did you know this move? Also, there's something wrong with the name."

The next second, the villain acted as if he was being attacked, and the eight characters "frost special effects" and "fire special effects" were shot out like bullets, hitting the villain crazily, and finally being imprinted on the villain's chest.

"So strong."

The villain let out a whine and fell to the ground.

His face was pressed to the ground, his eyes were dull, and he sighed.

"He is worthy of being the successor of Nine Sun Divine Fist."

"I have a life without regrets."

Wang Dachui was speechless: "Wuhui, your sister, I haven't made a move yet."

The villain ignored Wang Dachui's complaints and continued to express his final words: "I think of running under the sunset that afternoon. That was my lost youth."

Wang Dachui complained crazily: "Hey, can you stop thinking about these weird things?"

The villain sighed, then died.

Wang Dachui sighed feebly.

The scene changed and he was walking on a path.

The voiceover sounded: "Now that the enemy has been defeated, I should be able to rescue the princess."

At this moment, an enemy jumped out from the side.

"No, you still have to defeat me."

But what is surprising is that this enemy looks exactly like the villain who was defeated by Ice and Fire Nine Heavens just now. He is completely an actor.

Wang Dachui also discovered this and complained: "Didn't I just defeat you?"

The enemy laughed: "Did you think that person just now was me?"

Wang Dachui complained wildly: "It's totally you, it's just a change of clothes. Who can't recognize you?"

The enemy laughed wildly: "Hahahahahahaha."

Then he nodded: "Yes, it's me."

Wang Dachui complained in disbelief: "You are shameless enough to admit it. This crew is too poor. If you change the actor, you will die."

"Hehehehehe."

Lin Ziyi's goose-like laughter sounded again.

This skit, this skit, is really shocking, but it’s so funny, it’s so funny that I can’t stop laughing even if I want to.

On the screen, Wang Dachui looked thoughtful: "How should I deal with this enemy?"

Wang Dachui stretched out his fists, and strange special effects appeared again.

Just when Lin Ziyi thought Wang Dachui would continue to use Nine Yang Divine Fist, the content on the screen suddenly changed.

It changed into a simple drawing style, with two stick figures facing each other, with Wang Dachui written on one head, and enemy written on the other head.

Then a line of words appeared on the screen.

"Wang Dachui used his unique skill Nine Yang Divine Fist, and the enemy responded with the Qiankun Vajra Palm. Suddenly, fire broke out. The two of them flew over the walls and fought for hundreds of rounds."

Following the font, the stick figure made various rough movements according to the font, and then more and more words appeared on the screen, so densely packed that it was impossible to see them clearly.

By the time the screen returned to normal, the enemy had fallen to the ground and gave his last words: "He is truly worthy of being the successor of Nine Sun Divine Fist."

Wang Dachui looked in disbelief: "What happened just now? I didn't do anything. Why did the enemy fall on his own?"

The enemy continued to give his last words: "I have no regrets in my life. I think of running under the sunset that day. That was my lost youth."

Wang Dachui complained: "Don't say this, okay? You already said this line before when you died."

The enemy finished his lines and died again.

Wang Dachui let out a feeble sigh.

The plot continued, with Wang Dachui walking listlessly on the road.

"The princess is about to be rescued. Why don't I have any expectations in my heart?"

Then, he walked to a piece of grass, and a flaming mountain made with terrible special effects appeared in front of him again. On the top of the flaming mountain stood a demon king wearing armor.

Wang Dachui complained: "The special effects could be a little worse. They don't even have fifty-cent special effects. And the guy standing on the top of the mountain is the guy I defeated twice in a row."

"Why is it so exquisite this time? It was so perfunctory before."

Yes, the demon king faced in the last level is still the actor who appeared before. He has exquisite makeup and holds a mace in his hand. He does look a bit like him.

The Demon King smiled: "Brave, you are finally here, the princess is locked up in this, this, this, this"

The Demon King's lines were stuck again.

Wang Dachui couldn't help complaining: "It's so difficult to memorize just a few lines. How many times have you said it wrong?"