The Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

Even amongst Main Gods, some would be more outstanding than others.

Chaos War God Donatis had forever been viewed as someone undefeatable who would always act as the Chaos Abyss’s vanguard. He had experienced countless battlefields without ever being defeated. The long years and countless combat achievements meant that no glorious nickname was even necessary as proof of his might. The simple reputation of being the undefeated War God was more than enough.

Donatis was forever the center of attention on any battlefield that he appeared on.

It was the same for this battle of Gods as well. However, nobody had ever expected that Donatis would be completely suppressed.

What mortals knew was that the tall bronze War God would forever look down upon the castle walls at his feet, and then easily crush the walls along with any mortals who tried to resist him. He would forever expressionlessly destroy everything in front of him and return it to Chaos.

Donatis was absolutely, unreasonably strong. It was impossible for him not to view mortals as nothing more than ants.

But right now, the undefeated War God seemed just like a young child getting beaten up by an adult. Donatis had always been proud of his gigantic size, but he didn’t even reach Titan’s waist.

The thunder giant wore an ancient white cloth robe, a belt containing a staff, and grass slippers. These were all articles of clothing created from plants. He looked like the very picture of an old artifact who had jumped out of a myth.

Titans had always been viewed as a powerful species equal to dragons in strength. However, it was likely that very few existences still remembered that the entire Titan species had been named after Titan, the first Titan.

Donatis and Barbarot had been the largest ones on the battlefield before Titan’s arrival. However, they weren’t even half of Titan’s height. Titan was wearing an olive circlet on his head which reached into the clouds. His very breathing dispelled the clouds as lightning streaked in his eyes. Everywhere that he focused his vision on would actually be struck by lightning.

Titan was the eldest child of the Creator Goddess Astrya and her most beloved child. He was a super indestructible existence that had lived since the beginning of the very first generation. He was a tremendous God who had led his tribe in challenging the entire world.

It was impossible for me to comprehend how powerful he truly was, as I had been unable to find a single record in all of history of anyone surviving a fight against him.

If one went by seniority, Titan was the oldest existence in the Eich universe after the Creator Goddesses. He had agreed to become the protector of the Land of Spring out of consideration for his species back when Dragon World had been collapsing. Even with this, nobody would be able to issue commands to someone as ancient as Titan.

I wouldn’t be able to command him. As for Ayer who was also someone from the first generation… he wouldn’t be able to, either, as even he would be considered disrespectful if he tried to address Titan as “bro”.

Fortunately, unlike what the myths about Titan said, this ancient child of the earth had already gotten tired of battle. Over the past decade, Titan had focused mostly on the construction of the Land of Spring. He seemed just like a happy retired old man with a kindly expression who smiled every day.

However, nobody would underestimate him because of his appearance. There was no doubt that Titan and the Titans were the strongest group of warriors in all of Hell.

“It would be such a pity not to use such a powerful existence who isn’t even permanently bound to Hell.”

Even with Ayer delegating full authority to me, I still wouldn’t be able to command such an ancient existence. If I instead tried to command the lowest-ranking Titans, they might not be powerful enough, and I would even need to consider if they would still willingly return to the Land of Spring after coming to the mortal plane… Cough, since the highest-ranking Titans weren’t exactly the type who were easy to talk to, after all.

Thus, I personally went to find Titan for a discussion.

The other Titans didn’t even try to conceal their expressions suggesting that my discussion was nothing more than a joke. Nobody would be able to tell Titan to do anything. However, I ended up disappointing the other Titans.

After a short private discussion, not only did Titan agree to personally help me, he even “humiliated” himself by hiding in my personal Hell world, turning into my personal Charmander… er, something like a grandfather spirit.

This made it quite easy for Heimor to hide in my personal Hell world as Titan would properly teach the incredibly arrogant Heimor how to behave.

This was also why the Lord of Thunder was probably the single unluckiest phoenix in the entire world. When the phoenix of wind and light was brought into my personal Hell world, he thought that he would be able to fight me in single combat, but he was actually ganged up on by Titan, who was just as skilled in controlling lightning and light, along with Heimor, a professional at sneak attacks. With two Main Gods ganging up on the Lord of Thunder with sneak attacks… well, he died in an incredibly pitiful fashion.

The Lord of Thunder pitifully died 342 times in my personal Hell world. The longest that he lasted was 38 seconds, while the shortest he lasted was one second.

After so many forced rebirths, the Lord of Thunder was finally restricted to being reborn in a location of my own choosing. He was thus trapped within my Dawn sword.

I reused the blueprint and concept from creating a sword for Adam back in the day. The world’s #1 artisan Titan also assisted me in adding the phoenix’s spirit to my Dawn sword, completing its first major upgrade and allowing me to witness Titan’s inconceivable skill at smithing.

Ahem, I was getting off topic. Perhaps some readers have already guessed how I managed to convince Titan to willingly help me. Indeed, there was nobody in the world who could tell Titan what to do, but my System wasn’t a person!

Whoops, my mistake, I didn’t mean to imply that my System was a thing… Just recalling those quests that she made me suffer through made me realize that my System didn’t even count as a thing!

[…Your evil intentions are overflowing. If you don’t start being more polite to me, trust that I’m going to have that child beat you up. A single punch will definitely make you handicapped for life.]

Hmph, Astrya was looking down on me too much. Did she think that a threat of violence would be enough to shut me up? Yep, of course it would. Was face something that could be eaten? I was going to shut up right now!

Seeing how pitiful Donatis appeared right now, I considered what it would feel like to receive a punch from a fist that was even larger than an entire castle, and then wisely chose to act manly (knowing when to retreat).

That was right, the only one in this world capable of controlling Titan was my System Astrya. Titan considered her as his own mother since he had experienced even the creation of the world.

Children would always miss their mother.

Being family was carved into the soul and impossible to erase.

An overly long period of time would only make one miss the other even more.

A reunion would be joyful yet sad.

Even now, I still remembered how the gigantic Titan actually sat down and cried rivers like a young child when he saw Astrya again…

Ahem, in order to avoid bringing disaster upon myself, I should really shut up now. Currently, Titan was having fun beating up Donatis who seemed like a young child in front of him.

The bronze War God was in a daze from the beating. He had probably never seen a fist which was larger than his head before. Every thunderous punch that came from above was impossible to defend against or dodge. Donatis’s mega greatsword hadn’t taken any visible damage from the first three punches, but by now, it was nothing more than tiny shattered piece. Donatis thus could only take the blows with his physical body.

Titan didn’t use any special abilities. All he did was use brute force which was usually Donatis’s favorite style. Every single punch landed a heavy blow on Donatis’s physical body and soul. The very fact that Donatis had lasted so long without becoming completely shattered himself was evidence of how ridiculously strong he was as well.

Titan smashed the powerful Donatis into the ground. Donatis angrily roared, causing the entire world to be afraid of this battle, but that still didn’t help him. Titan maintained the same steady tempo while constantly punching Donatis.

[No need to overthink things. This is Titan’s only method of fighting. He doesn’t really have any special abilities. This is how all of us fought back in the day.]

Was this really the way the ancient Gods fought each other? The Creator Goddesses of Order and Chaos each led a bunch of half-naked brawny Gods at mud-wrestling? This was far too wondrous of a scene for me to even dare imagine. I wanted the image of beautiful mythic battles returned to me!

[…]

“Please don’t remain silent! This will really make me think that ancient mythic battles were fought like this!”

I was greeted by even more silence. Fine, let us not focus on these meaningless things, and return to the battle at hand.

Nobody still believed that Donatis could win at this point. The only question was how long he could last. Heimor and I had the mission of stopping the other Chaos Main Gods from being able to help Donatis.

Heimor and Barbarot were still dueling on the ground. However, everyone knew that there wasn’t much difference in power between these two old acquaintances. No victory would be determined anytime soon from this battle, much less life or death.

My enemy, Sophocles the Deceiver, was clearly the only hope for the Chaos Faction on the battlefield right now. Yet, he kept fighting with me quite slowly, only slightly testing me with each attack as if he wasn’t using his full strength at all.

I was even beginning to suspect if he wanted to see Donatis die here, but I instinctively felt that couldn’t be it. If Donatis died here, not only would that result in the Chaos Faction’s invasion failing, we would also never pass by this opportunity to slay him. Being able to slay two Chaos Main Gods simultaneously in the mortal plane would be a once-in-a-thousand-years opportunity.

Finally, Sophocles started acting inconceivably as if something he had been waiting for had just occurred.