The Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

Translator: imperfectluck  Editor: Kurisu

“Her Majesty Glina Caso has arrived!”

“Damn it, why wasn’t I notified beforehand!?”

While everyone else around me was still celebrating, I was doing my very best to find an escape route. I then understood from the evil smiles of Reyne and the other Mist Kingdom government officials that they had set up this pitfall for me.

I had no idea why I wanted to run. However, I felt a mysterious sense of panic, that if I didn’t run, I would truly be in major trouble.

“Do you need to be in such a panic? You simply didn’t give her any living expenses for the past eight years. Although you’re a complete failure as a father, you’re a failure in so many other areas as well. Do you really need to mind it so much?” Harloys commented.

I had a sudden realization. So that was what it was! Back in the day, to make things more convenient, I had officially adopted Glina as my daughter, and even changed out her entire bloodline to become mine. So legally, and by blood, she was now my daughter. But, I had been absent for the past eight years, and hadn’t given her any spending money at all. So that was why I was feeling guilty!

After thinking of this, I felt much calmer. I put on a smile as I faced the door.

“It’s been eight years. She was a teenager back then, so she must be in her early twenties now. Women always change after reaching adult age. Perhaps she’s now become a mature beauty!”

However, reality would always be quite cruel.

*Boom!*

A gray mecha which appeared to be pure steel stepped into the hall, leaving faint cracks where its feet trod.

My smile froze on my face as I had an ominous premonition.

The next second, my ominous premonition became real.

This gigantic mecha was more than three meters tall. Its body shape and the power pack on its back along with its powerful energy made me think of the Mage Country’s adamantite puppets.

When the mecha saw me, two light bulbs on its head lit up as if it was a vulture staring at its prey, or as if it was a demon from the Chaos Abyss.

The mecha opened up its metal arms, pouncing towards me. There were loud shattering sounds as small rocks were kicked up everywhere, and the ground trembled as if there was an earthquake. The floor was pitifully cracked everywhere that the mecha passed by.

It felt as if a tornado was approaching me with all the small rocks flying around so quickly. Or, perhaps I should say it seemed like a speeding train about to crash into me.

I wanted to hide, and was already preparing to run when a familiar voice from the mecha’s helmet stopped me in my tracks.

“Dad, I really missed you!”

A youthful female voice came from the head of that steel giant. Her voice caused me to stop as I recalled how I had simply left without even saying a single word eight years ago. She still recognized me as her “father” despite that? I felt a mysterious sense of guilt wash over me. So this was her way of expressing how she missed me? This was simply a moving reunion between father and daughter!

‘I must behave like a proper adult here.’

I stood up and smiled as I opened up my arms to meet my daughter’s embrace, and then…

…felt a powerful force slam into me as I heard the sound of bones snapping. Judging from the pain, I had more than 10 broken bones. My pain soon left me as I fell unconscious. My final thoughts were, ‘Ah, so it really was adamantite after all, not steel. This definitely looks and feels like adamantite. Daughter of mine, you’ve become so heavy. Eh? That little girl waving her hand at me from the door looks so familiar. She, she really looks like Glina! Damn it, I fell into another pitfall! So it really was a pure adamantite puppet that crashed into me!’

At this time, I was still trying my best to remain conscious, although I really would have preferred to fall unconscious. That was because I saw that plumes of black smoke were rising from this gigantic adamantite puppet’s head. Judging from typical developments, next up would be…

*Boom!*

According to what I later heard, even people outside the royal palace heard a tremendous explosion coming from the palace.

“Ahh, how familiar it feels to be stuck beneath white ceiling again.”

When I opened up my eyes after waking up, that was the first comment I had. Of course I was familiar with the white ceiling and the scent of medicine. Recently, the royal infirmary had basically been my home.

“I need to clarify that I didn’t do the last one on purpose!”

“So, it’s just a typical out-of-control self-destruction as always, and you mean that everything before that was on purpose?”

I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. I recalled how I had abandoned Reyne and Glina, creating Hell without their knowledge, and even intentionally kept them out of the loop for everything I was doing, all in order to avoid information leaking to Karwenz. The guilt I felt from doing this made it impossible for me to be angry.

However, when I looked in the direction Glina’s voice came from, I was shocked to my core.

“You, you, you, how is this possible, you?!”

Don’t misunderstand, I wasn’t surprised by her change into a mature adult woman, but rather…

“Why haven’t you changed at all!”

Glina had a familiar childish appearance, familiar short blonde hair, and an equally familiar eyepatch on her right eye. The only new thing about her was that her eyepatch now had a bear drawn on it.

Glina angrily glared at me when she heard my words. If I really had to say what was different, Glina now seemed far more humanlike compared to the emotionless ice doll she’d been before.

Back when Glina was only 12 years old, her sealed demon bloodline had affected her physical appearance, but now that she was in her twenties, she still looked exactly the same as eight years ago.

“I should be asking you just what blood you put into me back then!”

I paused upon hearing this, then started breaking out into a cold sweat. Reyne had abandoned the idea of changing out her bloodline as she started cultivating the path of Chaos, but I had given Glina my own blood to replace the demon bloodline within her. So, in a way, she now had a slightly weaker version of my Double Diamond bloodline.

Now, Glina hadn’t changed in physical appearance one bit over the past eight years, which meant for me that…

“System, tell me the truth! Just how many years will it take this bloodline of mine to reach adult age?”

This bloodline was the very essence of Order and Chaos combined, a miracle product that was completely unique in the world. Not a single person in the past or present, apart from Glina and myself, would have this bloodline.

[I’m sorry, the phone number you have dialed is currently unavailable. Please try again later.]

My System was even pretending to be an unavailable cell phone number? I really didn’t know what to say to this irresponsible System of mine anymore. When I looked again at how young Glina still appeared to be, I suddenly felt that even eating the 500 years’ worth additional age of Dusk Fruits I had saved up wouldn’t be enough to help me reach adult age.

Although it was rather fresh to see Glina with an expression of such dissatisfaction, I also felt such a headache about this legal loli.

“Even if she can somehow get married successfully, her husband will probably be viewed by everyone as an extreme pervert. So, the issue of a successor for the Sleuweir Kingdom…”

No wonder why I had never heard any scandalous rumors about Glina in the past eight years. It would sound criminal for there to be any rumors about such a queen.

I figured that the retainers of the Sleuweir Kingdom were probably in despair about ever having a royal descendant. With Glina’s physical body, even if she got married, it would probably be impossible for her to have children for several centuries to come.

“Don’t look at me like that. You’re just like those annoying, naggy retainers of mine. Must women have children? I never thought that Dad would also be so ridiculously old-fashioned.”

Little Glina was pouting with a dissatisfied expression, just like a teenaged girl who was dissatisfied with her father’s arrangements. Was this a belated rebellious period? When Glina said those words, the silly cat froze in surprise, and even fell off the bed.

This was a feudal, male-dominated generation. People here indeed felt that the most important role for a woman was to have children. It wouldn’t be simple for Glina to be able to say what she did out loud.

I took a deep breath. If she didn’t want to have children, then that was fine with me. I owed freedom of choice in that matter to her. As her adopted father, I would help her with this matter! Although, I felt like it would sound awkward. Was there something wrong with what I was about to say?

“Relax, as your adopted father, I’ll support you. You don’t have to have children if you don’t want to. I’ll help you have children! Don’t misunderstand, what I mean is, I’ll go talk to the wood spirits as they have biological reproduction techniques that can create descendants without the need for marriage!”

*Smack!*

Upon hearing this, Glina paused in surprise, and the silly cat fell off the bed again even though she had just jumped up. Both of them were looking at me with astonished expressions.

“What, isn’t this a good idea? We can even artificially create backup limbs for you with the wood spirits’ technology, as well as create a genetic descendant for you without needing marriage. It’s technologically possible now!”

“It’s not a matter of technology. It’s a matter of morals. There must be something wrong with your head!”

“Haha, I feel reassured now. As expected, you’re still the same Roland as before.”

Meanwhile, Glina recovered her senses and covered her mouth while giggling. I didn’t know what she was thinking behind that bright smile of hers. She was the smartest engineer in the Northlands, after all.

However, I suddenly felt a chill rise up my spine. I was quite familiar with this sensation. It typically meant that I had mysteriously fallen into yet another pitfall.

If you find any errors ( broken links, non-standard content, etc.. ), Please let us know so we can fix it as soon as possible.