The Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

Translator: imperfectluck Editor: Kurisu

Back on my original world of Earth, there was a certain ancient country that had just started recovering from a foreign invasion as well as an internal war. During those difficult times, since that country’s military forces, equipment, and technology was evidently inferior to other countries’, that country could only use its already limited funding to research new weapons.

“…Perhaps I can’t beat you in a direct fight, but I can at least take you down with me. And even if you’re so much stronger than me that I can’t take you down with me, I can make you pay a tremendously heavy price.”

And so, back in the “peaceful” era on Earth, later termed the “Cold War”, major countries stockpiled enough nuclear weapons to destroy the Earth many times over. If any of these countries went overboard, then that country would surely win the award for starting the war which destroyed the world, but by then there would be nobody left to give such an award… Cough, cough, at any rate, it was wonderful that no such nuclear world war was ever fought. Cheers to peace!

But right now, I was facing a similar decision…

[Since you can’t beat her in a direct fight, then you should plant your mushroom.]

Mushroom?

Of course, I didn’t think for even a moment that Astrya was referring to the edible type. The next instant, I figured out what I had forgotten.

“Salo’s Crystal!”

As I’d previously mentioned, Salo’s Crystal was a special type of crystal used in the Haletdam generation to power floating cities. The only reason why this type of crystal was never used as a weapon back then was because its explosion radius had far surpassed even the strongest catapult in the world.

And, I just happened to be in possession of one Salo’s Crystal, which had been in Aso’s mage tower, which was now the main mage tower of Yongye City.

This ancient weapon had experienced much in the past few years. This specific Salo’s Crystal had been aimed right at the Truth Symposium, and I had shown it to the Mage Country to give them some stimulation. After that, I tossed it to Timlad for him to research energy sources and weapons, but he didn’t make anything of it, so I took it back with me into Hell as one of my potential trump cards.

I had indeed tried to put this Salo’s Crystal to use in a weapon or piece of equipment, and while there were some minor results, this Salo’s Crystal was a tremendous energy source that was also highly unstable. In the end, I could only give up and let it gather dust in my warehouse to await the day that it was successfully reverse engineered.

And so, this Salo’s Crystal was still in my possession. And, the ironic part was that I was now about to use it against Aso’s own kind and his former lover. Perhaps this was the destiny of the magical world’s equivalent of a nuclear weapon.

“Wait a moment, if you detonate it here, all of Starwood City… No, all of this entire domain and the plains around it will be leveled.”

[Use your personal Hell.]

Alright, there was no need to state the rest of the plan. Although it was a bit of a waste to use a nuclear weapon against only a single enemy, when that single enemy was the main commanding Undead Emperor, it would be worth it.

“You have a plan? I highly doubt that she’ll obediently enter my personal Hell world after she saw what it could do to her undead fodder.”

[…Think of a plan for yourself, useless!]

Alright then, was it in every woman’s nature to hold a grudge? It was quite evident that Astrya was still angry at me for calling her useless previously. But I shook my head as there was no need to ask her for a plan. If I compared the Goddess of Order’s abilities in scheming and scamming to my own, she wouldn’t even be ten percent as skilled as me… By the way, this didn’t seem like something I should be proud of?

After a quick rotation of my brain, I indeed came up with a scheme. It would be completely meaningless to lie to Conservation as existences at her power level would instinctively be able to discern truth from lies. However, I had already come up with a nice set of truthful words to deceive her with… By the way, what was wrong with the style of my story! I was supposed to be the good guy and hero! Why was it that I was always scheming and scamming!

[Rest assured, out of every hero I’ve chosen to attach myself to throughout the ages, you’re by far the one who’s the most like an antagonist. But, you’re also the one who’s done the most to save the world. This is the best proof of the maxim that good people never live long. Relax. You’ll definitely have an incredibly long life.]

“Tsk, you’re using a roundabout way to call me a villain?”

The silly cat kept nodding in agreement with Astrya’s words, making me feel rather helpless. But, now wasn’t the time to care about such matters…

“Conservation, you know, we could actually try talking things out. For example, the possibility of the undead coexisting with the living, the future of the Tark Republic, the fact that I have a wonderful world of my own you could use where there’s no conflict whatsoever… Would you like to find a place for a little chat… Damn, she’s crazy!”

I sent a soul message directly to Conservation, using the favorite communication method preferred by liches. Unfortunately, before I could say anything more, thunder filled the air and indicated Conservation’s attitude. It would seem that Conservation was rejecting all possible negotiations.

She was absolutely correct to do so. How could one possibly believe the words of an enemy before a major battle? If I was in the same position, I would also ignore the negotiation offer. No matter what you offered, and even if negotiation was really possible, it would be far better to finish the battle and “negotiate” from the victor’s position.

“…I, I have Aso’s inheritance and his final dying message, which also involves you! Sabrina! If you miss this opportunity, you’ll never learn what Aso wanted to say to you!”

Incredibly few existences in the world knew Conservation’s original name, back from millenniums ago before she had become undead. Using her name was quite effective, and it seemed that Aso’s final message to his lover was quite important to Conservation. The next instant, all the thunderstorms quieted down.

Right after that, there was a soul summoning that caused all the charging high-level undead to stop in confusion. But, their Undead Emperor’s orders were absolute. The undead could only stop their attack and return in confusion to their master’s side.

“…You’re not lying to me. However, I can’t sense any sincerity from you.”

Conservation’s ethereal figure appeared once more on top of her throne in my soul vision. Her words contained no emotional upheaval as they echoed through the skies. She looked directly at me with an ice-cold gaze. The next moment, I stood in front of the window in my mage tower, and flashed my Holy Knight sincere (begging) smile which I had honed over many years!

Look! My shining eyes were filled with burning passion! My slightly upcurved lips were evidence of joy stemming from my heart! And, my bright blonde hair could reflect the sun itself, being the best evidence of me being the Child of Holy Light…

“Harloys! Stop pretending to narrate in my voice! I’ll throw you out! What? You’re saying that my hair is now dry and cracked because I haven’t taken care of it over the years, and that I forgot to dye my hair yellow again? I… well, whatever!”

I recalled what I’d been like back in the day while sighing that I would have to depend on my looks once more. And then, I swung my foot, sending the constantly commenting cat into the sky, while combing my hair the best I could and then smiling at Conservation with the most sincere smile I possibly could.

“Sincerity? Passion? I have plenty of that here, far more than you think. I wonder if you can handle all my sincerity and passion?”

“People in the Haletdam generation were no idiots. They had witnessed many tribes who were taught intelligence by another species later rebel against the same species which was their benefactor. For instance, humans and elves, or goblins and ogres. That was why the Haletdam humans were always highly on guard against their own artificial souls and artificial intelligence. From the very start, the Sky Tower Spirit’s status was heavily restricted. The spirit is nothing more than an existence with administrator privileges. However, it will never be the true master of this tower!”

The clearing was now filled with broken machinery. The long years had weakened the combat strength of these robots that were never made for combat in the first place. And now that everyone had some time to rest, Timlad knew that he had to give at least some explanation since everyone else was glaring at him angrily.

“That is to say, out of all the souls deep asleep in this tower, one specific soul is actually the true master of this tower. That soul is also the master of this Sky Tower Spirit. And, based on the most basic foundational programming of artificial intelligence, no matter the situation, the Sky Tower Spirit will not only be forbidden from harming its master, it will also be forced to work for its master’s benefit! As long as the Sky Tower Spirit is still alive, this is its foundational programming that’s impossible for it to escape from.”

Strange characters from the Haletdam generation flashed in the narrow elevator that everyone was riding in. Timlad adjusted the elevator controls while telling everyone the truth. Whether everyone here would succeed in stopping the dangerous situation here or be forced to run for their lives would all depend on if the truth Timlad guessed at was real or not.

“However, the Sky Tower Spirit that gained its own will was incredibly sly. Since it was forced to work for its master’s benefit, and its master was a sleeping soul, it learned soul surgery techniques ‘for the sake of its master’ and fed its master’s soul a large number of other natural souls in the tower to help strengthen its master’s soul to an incredible degree. However, the overly large number of soul shards also caused the master’s soul to lose her own memories. And, also for ‘its master’s sake’, the Sky Tower Spirit created the best possible artificial body with the greatest potential for its master, making its master start over from the very beginning as a baby…”

Timlad suddenly turned around to look straight at Katerina. She was currently completely pale and trembling while being held in her adopted father Old Barton’s arms. Suddenly, without any warning, Katerina stood up as numbers flashed in her eyes. She then smiled bitterly and continued where Timlad left off.

“…And then the Sky Tower Spirit ‘decided’ that such an environment would be unsuitable for a baby’s growth. And so, a ‘lucky’ adventurer was able to ‘accidentally’ find and take away a newborn baby from the ruins, which allowed the Sky Tower Spirit to be free from its master’s presence. It probably fears more than anything else the return of its true master. That’s right, I’m back now. I, Katerina, the master of the Black Tower, have returned.”

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