The Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

Translator: imperfectluck  Editor: Pranav

“‘News in Eich, First Edition’? What!? This magazine wasn’t made by the fairies?”

“It’s a new magazine published together by San Antonio, the Mage Country and several other major countries. It’s having astonishing sales success in all the countries. Whoever controls the information has power. Nobody is an idiot about this.”

This morning, a Blue Dragon flew into my campground and tossed down a gift bag including an invitation letter and this magazine.

Although this magazine didn’t have color printing, its paper was of good quality and its vocabulary well chosen. The content also had black-and-white pictures to go along with the articles.

“Let me see what news was so important that the fastest dragon species was chosen to deliver it to me.”

But the moment I flipped to the first page, I immediately closed the magazine.

“Ultraman vs. tiny monsters? Isn’t the style wrong?”

The headline news seemed ridiculous. Just at this moment, however, the silly cat jumped out of a corner.

“…Let me see. What Ultraman are you talking about? The headline clearly says ‘The vanished Cloud Giants forgotten by mankind have returned. In the battle between Bardi and the Holy Church army, the Cloud Giants viciously taught the dragons a good lesson. Halent’s army retreated after numerous losses.’ Eh, Cloud Giants? There are actually still Cloud Giants in the mortal plane?”

Indeed, these glowing giants really did resemble Ultraman. The dragons being beaten into submission on the ground did seem like tiny minions destined to die in a humiliating fashion.

Cloud Giants were one of the strongest species of giants. Known as the favored children of the Titan Giants, they were the tallest of all giants and had the most extravagant and beautiful appearances. It was said that their entire species consisted of handsome men and beautiful women that wore equally beautiful clothing. They were born with the natural talent of being able to control the clouds and weather, and they were also naturally skilled at Divine Arts. However, they were most famous for their excellent talent in art and music. Many majestic palaces remained in this world that were their creations. Even now, bards sung their songs, which were considered as classics.

Also, Cloud Giants had the highest Intelligence of all giants. Their race was capable of producing mages and priests. Not only that, they were one of the few giant species that worked cooperatively with each other in teams and groups. Individually, they weren’t as skilled in physical combat as Magma Giants, but Cloud Giant squadrons would be the most frightening type of giant squadron there was.

Cloud Giants hadn’t appeared in the mortal plane for an incredibly long time. Legends had it that they avoided the Intelligence-lowering curse on the entire giant species by escaping from the mortal plane. It would seem that since their ancestors, the Titan Giants, summoned them back, these legendary lovers of peace and art decided to go to war for the sake of their brethren.

“If the Cloud Giants attacked, then it’s easy enough to understand why Halent lost. Since the Titan Giants are able to control things from afar and understand what’s going on in the outside world despite being sealed, I think I need to raise my assessment and vigilance against the Titan Giants…”

The most attention-grabbing part for me was the tiny addendum at the end.

“PS: Rumors have it that angels appeared in this battle. But according to our investigation, they were only a group of Winged Tribe mercenaries that participated in battle. The underhanded Holy Church attempted to masquerade these Winged Tribe members as angels in order to shake the Bardi warriors’ morale.”

“Angels appeared?”

I asked this directly, and Kaid nodded.

“Yeah, that’s what I heard, but doesn’t the report say that they’re actually the Winged Tribe?”

Considering the political backers of this magazine—the most powerful countries—it naturally would be biased towards royal authority rather than church authority. It certainly wouldn’t print pro-church articles. Because this article said that the angels were Winged Tribe members, I felt it to be far more likely they were real angels.

The difference between Winged Tribe members and angels was like the difference between a chicken and a phoenix. Winged Tribe members were similar to flying humans, while angels were of an immemorial bloodline on par with dragons. Their difference in strength on the battlefield would be far too obvious.

Considering how normal humans in Eich considered angels as venerated personifications of extreme good, as well as God Envoys, if angels truly appeared to fight for the Holy Church, it would be a serious blow against the newly rising Church of Pure Holy Light. If angels appeared in the enemy’s side, the normal Bardi warriors would definitely have their morale severely shaken, not to mention how angels were strong warriors to begin with.

In that case, if the Holy Church’s vanguard army received support from both angels and Cloud Giants, it was only natural that Halent ended up losing.

“The enemies are the pure angels and the art and peace-loving Cloud Giants? While our side is filled with undead, evil dragons, Dark Elves, evil Underground creatures and greedy goblins? Why do I feel like we’re the antagonists?”

“Have you realized it only now? With Cloud Giants and angels in the enemy’s side, our soldiers’ morale will probably be affected.”

“…It doesn’t matter. A species doesn’t represent justice, nor is a species an excuse to slaughter. Why should we be frustrated about these foolish outdated ways of thinking?”

I wasn’t worried about our side’s morale. I was more worried because the great majority of angels were direct subordinates to various Order True Gods. Since these angels were participating in a mortals’ battle, this most likely meant that some True God had decided to intervene. And with my understanding of the fervent believers in the Holy Church…

“When they believe that they have their Gods’ favor, they’ll think that their every action represents divine will. Even the most evil of actions will be whitewashed to become holy. Corruption and viciousness will become a God’s mercy. Rather than trusting in a fervent believer’s sense of logic and reason, you might as well believe that a bloodthirsty villain can actually reform.”

“Talk like a normal human.”

“There will be a major slaughter and cleansing. Then, they’ll be filled with confidence as they prepare to bring the fight all the way to the Bardi capital. They’ll be receiving an endless amount of reinforcements and will force all the other countries to join their Holy Army. They’ll escalate this small-scale war directly into an Armageddon-level war. I fully believe that they’re capable of doing this.”

“…You’re suddenly being so direct; I’m not even used to this. But the more I think about it, the more I agree. This is definitely the Holy Church that I know. If they think that victory will absolutely be theirs, they’ll use the name of Holy Light to summon all the Holy Light believing countries to participate in this war. This conflict will escalate into a world war.”

Harloys didn’t say some other things out loud, but both of us knew what the other was thinking. Bardi was a mega-empire with an astonishing amount of accumulated wealth and resources. Since it was now showing weakness on both fronts, the ravenous wolves saw an opportunity to “act in the name of justice.” How could these predators possibly miss this chance?

I pondered many things as I put down this magazine. At this time in the game’s history, the world had entered the “Vultures of War” expansion pack. The elves and the beastmen began a war, and the major countries joined in and fought each other for their own ambitions. I originally thought that I avoided this worst outcome but never expected that “history” was so hard to control. It somehow mysteriously returned to the starting point.

“…No, the situation has still changed. Bardi in history was already destroyed at this point. No matter how things develop, things can’t be as bad as the game’s history. Besides, it’s still only at local battles right now. It might not escalate to world war. As long as I can act in time…”

I opened up the magazine again, intending to see what else had happened.

*Plop!*

But after taking just one look, I dropped the magazine on the ground. After flipping past the front-page news of Bardi’s lost battle, I saw an even more frustrating piece of news.

“San Antonio has declared war against the Fusi Empire and Seven Dukedom. Knights from both sides fought on the Brightbear Plains in the Seven Dukedom, with San Antonio emerging victorious.”

I had a grim expression as I picked the magazine up yet again and continued flipping through the pages. What I saw next only frustrated me even more.

“The Suolo Alliance is requesting that the Kasolan Kingdom give back the stolen national treasure Sea God’s Seal. General Ben forcefully stated that if the Kasolan Kingdom continues remaining silent on this matter, the Suolo Alliance will consider starting a war to take back the national treasure that rightfully belongs to them.”

“…New Sea Tribe species and sea monsters have appeared on Auland’s borders. The Queen of Storms’ priests and shamans have entered the battle along with organized Sea Giant squadrons. The war between Auland and the Sea Tribe has escalated even further.”

“…The Heen Elf Kingdom has announced that they will now be known as the Saint Heen Empire. Their Moonlight Elf Queen Afina has announced herself to be the new Elven Empress. She has requested the other Elven Kingdoms to subordinate themselves to her. Sixteen Elven Kingdoms pledged alliance to her, while twenty-three other Elven Kingdoms declared war against her. The Elves’ internal war has begun… Silly cat, don’t tear this magazine! How am I supposed to read it if you tear it up?”

Pitch-black magical waves roiled on the silly cat, and a shrieking banshee projection was forming on her black cat body. This was the first time I had ever seen Harloys angered to such an extent. It was obvious that she was truly furious.

I wisely ignored Harloys, who had all her cat hairs standing up on end. From a certain standpoint, the revival of the Elven Empire might be meaningful to ordinary elves. But as Harloys was the final Gold Elf, she would view this as the betrayers putting on a crown that should have rightfully been hers. This was a deep-seated enmity that could only end in one side’s death.

I continued to see similar pieces of news as I flipped through the magazine. Some of it seemed unimportant, but I felt they were truly troublesome upon closer analysis.

“A Giant Worm species has been spotted around the North Sea. These Giant Worms have taken over the local underground ruins and have incredible combat strength and are highly resistant to magic. It’s suspected that they’re a species from the immemorial generation.”

“Many Great Demons have appeared in the Orcephalon District of San Antonio. There are many subspecies of these Great Demons, including Forest Demons, Snow Demons, and Cliff Demons. San Antonio has warned local residents to be on guard as they organize an anti-demon hunting team.”

So many troublesome issues happened all at once. This seemed coincidental, but it was actually something definite. Now that the Holy War had begun, those who had hid their ambitions for thousands of years could act without restraints. Now that winter was over, the new spring was the perfect time to put into action these long prepared plans. These well-prepared ambitious schemers finally reached out their hands, making the world of Eich become quite hectic.

I closed the magazine and glanced over at the silly cat who was viciously glaring at the magazine, her banshee shadow furiously shrieking in anger. I shook my head at this scene. While it may seem like she no longer cared so much about the past, it was still a sore spot deep inside her that nobody could tread upon. And if anyone dared to touch my Northlands, I would probably react the same way, as if I were an injured beast with my hair standing up on end, hissing at all my enemies.

For Harloys, perhaps the deepest scar in her heart was about the Elven Crown that belonged to the Gold Elves. This inheritance passed down from so many generations and through so many rulers was lost by her.

The pain from losing one’s country? The pain from being betrayed by those she trusted the most? The feeling of helplessness from watching everything still head towards Armageddon? Perhaps it was that I could empathize with her due to my memories of the Mist Kingdom, or perhaps I simply didn’t want to see anyone bully my pet cat. As I looked at Harloys, who had fallen silent, I felt a sense of pity for her and didn’t like seeing her like this, which was why I made her a promise.

“Rest reassured. As long as I’m around, I won’t allow anyone else to comfortably wear the Elven Crown that rightfully belongs to the Gold Elves.”

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