"U—urgh…"
My body stirred as I was pulled from the realm of unconsciousness.
It felt so surreal, like I was in a daze. My body felt sublime—like it was brand new. I didn't feel any sensation like pain.
With this feeling of bliss, I opened my eyes to reality.
"U—uh…?"
I was currently lying down on a bed.
'Why am I here?'
I looked around, getting a good grasp of my surroundings. It looked like an infirmary, but something about it seemed more grandiose than the one I was used to.
Curiosity got the better of me, and I unconsciously activated Spellcraft to get a feel of everything around me.
Mana gathered and dispersed at my whim, and just as I was about to detect what was beyond the room…
>BRRRRRIIIIIINNNNGGGGGGG!!!<
A loud alarm rang that completely disrupted my focus.
"Argh! What the—?!"
I turned to glare at the source of the sound.
It was an object that was placed on the wall in a far corner from where I slept. It didn't take a second for me to realize what it was.
'A Magic Sensory Device, uh?'
More questions surged from within me. The usual Infirmary didn't have this device, so why was one here?
>CREAK!<
Before I could contemplate the reason any further, the opened door drew my attention and my eyes darted in the direction of the only visible entrance—and exit—of the room.
"Looks like you're up already. Not even long since you awoke and you're already using Magic, uh?"
My eyes widened as I saw my Lecturer—Neron Kaelid.
He was smiling gently, and his usual casual gait wasn't absent.
'Was he the one who brought me here? That explains the Magic Detection Tool…'
Though this only wrought more questions in my mind,
"Relax, Jared. I had to suppress your memories to stabilize your condition. You'll get them soon…"
'What is he talking about? Stabilize my condition? In the first place, why am I in the Infirmary?'
Those questions were interrupted by a sharp sensation that coursed through my head.
It felt surreal, like I was hanging between a dream and reality. I was lucid, but also drowsy.
Multiple fragments of memories rushed in at once, nearly overwhelming my consciousness.
Fortunately, there was no pain—at least not physically.
However, many other emotions caused me to clutch my chest tightly as I went through all that happened—all I experienced.
Fear. Anger. Anxiety. Confusion. Resolve.
Multiple feelings swirled in my heart as the final sequence of my memories played—Neron rescuing me as I fell unconscious.
The last thing I remembered was his hair turning white and his talk on 'Original Magic.'
"Haa… haa…"
"Looks like you've regained them…"
Neron walked across the room to fetch a chair while I panted as sweat began popping from my pores.
From the corner of my eyes, I spotted him taking the lone chair that was located by the corner of the room. He brought it close to my bedside and sat on it, looking at me with a smile.
I had lots of things to say to him, but…
"Why are you smiling?"
… I didn't know why I asked that question first.
He didn't respond, but his grin got wider instead.
Judging from the fact that I was still alive and Neron was smiling at me, the plot of Kahn and his ally was foiled. Neron arrived at a critical juncture and most likely turned things around.
I would have joined him to laugh if that was the only thing that went on in my head, but…
"… How many people died?"
Neron's smile froze.
He appeared dazed by my question.
I looked him in the eye and repeated my question. Compared to his deep dark retinas that brimmed with life, mine was sullen and low. It was weighed by guilt.
"Seven. Five boys and two girls."
Silence reigned the moment he said that.
"… I… see…"
A sharp, searing pain surged through my heart and I felt like breaking down into tears. Seven students lost their lives thanks to my incompetence. They were young and innocent.
'They didn't deserve to die…'
It was all my fault.
"I heard the number of casualties was over a hundred. If not for the barrier you placed around the dead ones, as well as the Automatons you enforced to protect their corpses, there would have been more deaths." Neron spoke.
From his tone, it didn't seem like he was trying to comfort me. He didn't appear to be lying too. The man was just stating facts.
"Losing seven people is unfortunate, but the fact that we were able to save almost everyone thanks to your efforts… is nothing short of a miracle."
Resurrection Magic wasn't omnipotent. It had flaws—and the success rate wasn't a hundred percent.
I did all I could to raise the odds to be as favorable as they could be, but… it still wasn't enough.
"Shit!" I let out without realizing it.
I clenched my teeth and tightened both fists in frustration and uncontrollable rage. Guilt pounded in my brain, but it was easily doused by the emotion of wrath directed at the culprit.
"Jared, listen—"
"Stop!" I interrupted Neron.
While I respected him to a high degree, and was also grateful to him for saving my life, I simply didn't think he could comprehend the inner turmoil I was going through.
"If you want to console me… or tell me that I was beyond amazing in all I did, then don't. I don't… I don't want to be patronized right now…"
I was nearly breaking into sobs.
It wasn't as though I had any personal ties with most of the students in Ainzlark—neither did I have any idea who died and who didn't. However… it still hurt like crazy.
"Jared… I say this, not simply as a lecturer or your master, but as a fellow Mage—no, a fellow person—you did well."
'Why is he saying this? What is he talking about? This isn't what I should be hearing. I failed! I failed miserably!'
"That's all I have to say about it. You did well."
His words were short, concise, and unfettered. One could read a dozen meanings into them.
As I stared into his eyes, all that they showed me was sincerity. Neron meant those words from the depth of his soul.
And—even though it was utterly selfish and conceited of me—that made me happy.
"Thank… you…"
After shouldering the burdens of everyone for the first time in so long… and failing to meet their expectations, perhaps… this was what I longed to hear.
It was childish and stupid of me, but…
"T—thank you… so much."
… Neron's words made me really happy.
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