[Net King] Take away my heart

your soul will feel alone

Melancholy at the gloomy tombstone

Please don't make a sound when you are alone

that loneliness is not loneliness

Because the person standing in front of you while alive

Their spirits will now surround you again

their minds will overshadow you

Now is an illusion that never fades away

They never leave your heart again

——Edgar Allan Poe, "The Dead"

I became a ghost.

Anyone who hears this will probably laugh for a while before questioning whether there is something wrong with your head.

If I could, I'd like to have a good laugh too, and say yes, it's a cheesy, silly joke.

However, this is a reality that makes people laugh no matter what.

The wreckage of the wrecked car was found at the foot of a motorway around [-]am on Monday.

Police and an ambulance arrived and found the body of the driver in the battered car, and later found a teenage girl who was seriously injured and unconscious near the wreckage.

The girl was on the verge of death when she was sent to the hospital. Although her vital functions were restored through all-out rescue, her consciousness sank into a long sleep and never woke up.

The girl became what is commonly known as a vegetable in medicine.

And this girl is me - the policeman said on the phone.

After the police notified the school, the principal and several teachers rushed to the hospital.I followed them all the way to the hospital, where I saw my parents crying.

Through the glass of the intensive care unit, I vaguely saw myself lying on the hospital bed.

Tubes were inserted all over my body, and a bunch of unknown instruments were docked beside the hospital bed, monitoring my faint signs of life through flickering electronic screens.

Is that really me?I am not sure.

Pale and bloodless face, tightly closed eyes, and scarred body.

This is a wonderful feeling that I have never experienced in my life.I followed the nurse who changed the dressing into the cold intensive care unit, and then stood in front of the bed looking at myself who was about to die.

Look at yourself.

Not through a mirror, but actually looking with these eyes.

Everything is like a dream.

I woke up in this ward in the morning and went to school as if nothing had happened.

"I" should be in school, so why is "I" lying in this place?

Which "I" is me?

There were so many incomprehensible things, I gave up thinking and turned my attention to those people standing outside the ward.

My mother almost fainted from crying, and my father was still being questioned by the police while crying.Two teachers helped my mother to sit aside, and the principal assisted my father to take notes with the police.

I saw the girl with a big mouth standing by the window, her hand was touching the glass, staring silently at me on the hospital bed.

what are you thinking about?Do you know I'm dying too?

I still have many, many things I want to say to you, but you can't hear me, can't see me.

All they saw was me lying on the hospital bed dying.

They don't know I'm here.

I'm right here.

"Mom, don't cry."

I went to my mother and squatted down, trying to wipe her tears away.

"Good news...my good news..."

My mother's tears were too much to wipe away, no matter how I shouted, no matter how I shook, my mother kept crying.

I went to Dad again.

Dad and the principal were standing with two policemen.A policeman was taking a pen to record what they said, while another policeman asked many questions.

"Why is your daughter's last name different from yours?"

"My eldest son has been in poor health since he was a child. Both my wife and I have jobs. Just taking care of him alone is exhausting...so my daughter was sent to her grandmother to raise her when she was very young..."

"Where is the son now?"

"Also in the hospital...he has been hospitalized for a long time..."

"Did your daughter skip class?"

"No, she has good grades and is a good child..."

"Have you ever run away from home before?"

"No."

"Have you noticed any abnormal behavior of her recently? Has anything suspicious happened around?"

"I-I don't know...it should be...not..."

Dad is so tired, he seems to have exhausted his strength every time he answers a question.Tears were all over his haggard face, but the police kept asking one question after another that made their intentions unclear.

"Did the girl go to class normally the week before the accident?"

Mr. Principal replied yes.

"How is she doing in school? Are there interpersonal issues?"

When asked here, Mr. Principal froze for a moment.

"I-I'm afraid I have to ask about her role... That teacher should know better."

The direction his hand was pointing at was the girl with a big mouth.

The two policemen then walked over there.

Dad squatted down like a deflated rubber ball, and the principal patted him on the shoulder to comfort him and said, "Kun Yukimura and Akiyama-kun are both very good students. It's unexpected that such a fact happened... Please express your condolences." , be sure to take care of your health, the school will do its best to assist you, I believe things will turn around..."

Dad suddenly sat in the corner with his head in his arms and cried bitterly.

"Why did this happen...why did this happen...if only I had been home that day...if I had stopped her from going out..."

Dad, it's not your fault.

Stop blaming yourself.

I feel sad that what I want to say cannot reach my father.

Mom and Dad are already very tired because of my brother, and now that I have become like this again, it is undoubtedly even worse for them.

—— "What exactly do you want to ask!? If you have something to say, just say it!"

Just when I looked at my father feeling sad, I suddenly heard the angry cry of the girl with a big mouth.

"I have told you countless times that there is nothing wrong with this child! She is very smart, very talented, and the best of all the students I have ever taught! Why do you suspect that there is a problem with her conduct? If you want to prove it, go to the school and look through her files! You can ask anyone you want! I don’t believe any teacher would say a bad word about her!”

The two policemen stared at her impassively.I saw tears flickering in the eyes of the girl with a big mouth.

"It's so strange... She has become like this... You guys are still suspecting some inexplicable things..."

She turned her head away and wiped away the tears with her hands.

"It's our responsibility to find out the truth of the accident. We didn't intend to find fault, but we need to give an explanation to the family." One of the policemen said, "This is not a traffic accident that is so simple that it can be dismissed. You know that although the girl survived, But the man driving that car is dead."

Someone died, and I don't know who that person was.

Wait...why don't I know who that person is?

"At the time of the incident, there was an adult and a minor in the car. According to the information we have so far, these two people are neither relatives nor teachers and students. There should be no relationship between them. That's right."

But they were sitting in the same car and had a car accident.

My mind seemed to gradually become blurred.

"So... what do you want to say?" The girl with a big mouth became emotional again, "You don't even know what's going on, stop confusing black and white! She's only 15 years old! You think she can do something What!?"

"Ma'am, please calm down."

"How can I be calm!? What right do you have to talk nonsense here—"

"We suspect that the girl was injured in more than just a car accident."

For a moment, everyone's eyes widened.

"Yes, she could have been thrown out of the car in the crash and injured herself. But we've discussed her injuries with the doctors here just now, and apart from fractures and trauma all over her body, her most serious brain injury was man-made. The marks... weren't just caused by simply falling out of the car."

"What do you mean...artificial..."

Mom stopped crying and stared at the policeman with blank eyes.

"This is not certain at the moment, it must be more carefully identified." The policeman sighed and said, "But we do suspect that the direct cause of your daughter's turning into a vegetative state was not an accident, but a deliberate homicide."

Everyone present was silent, no one spoke again, and the air seemed to freeze at this moment.

Something exploded in my mind with a bang.

I realized that I had absolutely no memory of what happened the day of the accident.

I was in the car with a guy, who was that guy?I have no idea.We had a car accident, how did it happen?Why did it happen?I have no idea.

Am I thrown out of the car?How did I fall into a coma?I have no idea.

Someone was trying to kill me... maybe already.

Who that person is, I don't know.

I don't know, I don't remember anything.

"Before the matter is investigated clearly, I hope you will not publicize any details."

Before leaving the hospital, the police sternly exhorted the father and the principal.

"If someone discloses these contents, it is likely to affect the progress of our investigation. After all, we cannot rule out the possibility that the suspect is around."

After that, Mom and Dad never cried again.The expressions seemed to disappear from their faces, they just looked at me in the ward silently, in a daze silently.

What the hell happened that day?

What did I do that day, before that day, before that?

can't remember.

Can't remember even a little...

I feel helpless and wandering.

The day of panic passed like this, and at night, Mom and Dad left the hospital.I didn't go back with them, I think it doesn't matter where I am now.

I sat on the edge of my hospital bed and gazed at myself for a long time.

"...someone wants to kill you."

I reached out and stroked the thick bandage wrapped around the forehead of "that me".

real touch.

Whether it's a bandage or skin, whether it's a nose or a lip, it's all real and warm to the touch.

And what about "myself"?

When I touch "myself", I don't feel anything.I just seem to be touching the air.

Where did my memory go?What am I now?

I don't believe in science fiction, and I don't believe in ghosts and gods. There is only one thing I know very well.

"That I" is still alive, and if she wakes up, she may be able to reveal all the truth and secrets.

"...I won't let you die."

I said softly.

I need to know the truth, I need to know what happened, and until then, I have to live.