[Net King] Take away my heart

The encounters in life are ever-changing, and no one can accurately predict what will happen in the future, just as none of us expected the series of tragedies that happened after entering the third grade.

I used to be proud that my data broke people's common sense, and I could use and analyze it freely in the game, smoothly dismantling the opponent's tricks and destroying their self-confidence.I can predict the opponent's next move, what they want to say next, and the trend and result of the game.

And that's just an expectation.

Data is not omnipotent, and data cannot manipulate human emotions.When you're really caught off guard, data is just empty talk and it doesn't help.

I am often said to have a good brain. I don’t know when it started. Everyone agrees that I know everything like a living dictionary, from astronomy and geography to gossip and gossip. Whenever there is a problem, everyone will be the first to know. Thinking of running to inquire with Liu Lianer.

But they were wrong.I don't know everything, on the contrary, there are many things that I don't understand.

Gathering intelligence and observing others has been my interest since I was a child, and it can also be said to be my specialty.It is a novel attempt to apply this specialty to tennis. To a certain extent, it can be said that it has been successful, and I have also won the title of the third chair of the Lihai Tennis Department.But in ordinary daily life, my specialty is not as good as people think that it can be used to settle everything.

I admit that I have observed Akiyama and Miyake, but I have never tried to gather intelligence and data from them.It's not that it can't be done, it's just that I don't want to.

I, Akiyama and the others are of the same kind—this is strange no matter how you look at it, isn’t it different for me and Genichiro?not like this.My teammates, my opponents, potential threats and promising new stars, I have recorded the information about these people with incomparable accuracy, and Akiyama and Miyake will never appear in this range.

I don't have to find out about them, that's not my interest, I just need to know a little.

That is the peace I feel when I am with them.

There are various human beings living on this earth, with different races, languages ​​and cultures, and skin and hair colors.From a biological point of view, we are all advanced organisms composed of countless cells. However, everyone has different personalities and ways of thinking, which are closely related to their growth environment and education.

So from a religious point of view, what kind of existence do we really have?God created us and created this world. He endowed each of us with a different soul and mission, and among these people, there must be a group of people who happen to be similar.

It has nothing to do with the environment in which we grew up, the education we received, and our personality and race. It's just that our souls are made of the same material as the gods.

I don't need to understand Akiyama and Miyake, just like they don't need to understand me.We are born as one kind of people, and even if others don't understand it, we know it very well.

The Dead Poets Club was established in the second grade. In that year, a freshman named Kirihara Chiya joined the tennis club. Nioh also recruited Hiroshi Yagyu from the golf club to the tennis club in a completely unexpected situation. .

The newborn King Lihai thus took its embryonic form.

Our second grade did have what could be called an easy time, before that heavy period of tragedy.

I remember that someone from the art department secretly revealed that Yukimura was very close to a senior from the art department named Mochizuki.Mochizuki-senpai, who was in the third grade, was a famous figure in the school at that time. She was not only the vice president of the student union, but also the head of the art department.No matter from which angle you look at it, Mochizuki-senpai is an object of admiration.With a gentle personality, excellent grades, a good birth, elegant manners and a beautiful appearance, you can almost say that she is the girl version of Yukimura.

At that time, Mochizuki-senpai and Yukimura were recognized as talented men and women in the eyes of everyone.

Some people say that Yukimura's excellence makes girls of his age seem too childish and superficial, and Mochizuki-senpai, who is one year older than us, just makes up for this.

In the tennis club, except for Marui, who occasionally does good things, no one will ask Yukimura about his personal affairs.Whether he was dating Mochizuki-senpai at that time, I still don't know very well.

The second grade seems to be a delicate watershed. People who are ignorant of the unknown stay at one end, and at the other end, starting with Marui and Yukimura, a corner of the mysterious veil is gradually lifted.

Are you asking which side I am on?I guess I still don't know much about it, I was either tennis or the poetry club in second grade and never really took those things to heart.In fact, I also asked Genichiro similar questions, but in exchange he said: "Boring! It's too early for us!"

Apart from Genichiro, Akiyama and Miyake seemed to be the ones who had nothing to do with this kind of thing.They just immerse themselves in their own world, dissociate from the crowd all day long, and keep company with piles of poetry, prose, ink, paper and pen.

Although the Dead Poets Society, a group of only three people, has never been officially recognized by the school, with the serialization of the school magazine and regular readings by the radio department, the works of the poetry society are also inadvertently spread in every corner of the school.Although these changes only made Genichiro more unhappy, there were gradually people in the school who thought we were cool.

"Senior Liu! I heard that you are very good at writing poems, right? This is something I wrote recently, I hope you can read it!"

Not only me, Miyake and Akiyama also met many people who came here for their fame.In addition to occasionally dealing with juniors who need advice, many clubs in the school also expressed the hope that we could write some unique introductions for them to achieve the purpose of attracting everyone to join the club.

Miyake, who thinks that she does not pursue fame and fortune but only wants to have fun, was unwilling to accept these chores at first, but when some clubs offered attractive rewards, she agreed.

"The guy from the literature department said they can get a free library card from the prefectural library for 365 days!" Miyake told us with bright eyes.

If the library card is still within the understandable range, then the rewards given by other clubs really give people a feeling of being completely confused.

For example, people from the Kendo Club gave Miyake a dozen coupons for self-service restaurants, and Miyake said that we could eat there another day.Another example is that the people in the swimming department gave her a point card for the swimming gym, and Miyake said that we can go swimming another day.People from the astronomy department gave her a coupon for a free trial of the full-body hair removal package in the beauty salon, and Miyake said, we might use it someday.

While Miyake was tempted by the coupons of various point card consumption cards, the Dead Poets Club, which was originally idle to do nothing, also had a busy period.

Under such circumstances, the three members of the Dead Poets Society held a small meeting about whether to expand the recruitment of new members.Originally, Miyake and Akiyama had the full authority to decide this kind of matter, but Miyake said that I am also a member of the poetry club, so I have to ask for my opinion.

I have no objection to writing introductions for those clubs, even without those messy point cards as compensation.But I still hope that the poetry club can maintain the original intention of writing poems purely for the sake of writing poems, not for the purpose of fame and fortune, and enjoy writing what I like.As long as this can be maintained, I have no problem with expanding the club or whatever. I told Miyake and Akiyama frankly my thoughts.

"Keep your original intention... You can say very classic sentences occasionally, Lianji!"

Miyake patted my shoulder heavily while talking.She showed an expression of enlightenment.

As a result, the association did not expand its membership.The three of us hurriedly completed those commissions from the society. Miyake said that if she didn't meet really big rewards in the future, she would not accept these messy commissions again.

After writing a bunch of club introductions, Akiyama and I were a little bit exhausted.The three of them sat cross-legged on the floor of the gymnasium. It was late in the evening when the basketball team ended its activities, and the sun began to sink. Not far away, the sound of the track and field team running around and shouting slogans could be heard.

Seeing that we were not energetic, Miyake smiled slyly and took out something from his schoolbag.

"Let's do something to lift our spirits, comrades."

She held up a pack of cigarettes in her hand.

The law stipulates that minors are not allowed to smoke or drink until they reach the age of 20. Miyake should be very clear about this.What's more, if you smoke in school, it is not impossible to get expelled from school if the teacher finds out.

"Two days ago I showed the poems I wrote to my dad. I didn't expect that guy to say that the poems I wrote were crooked poems that I couldn't understand." Miyake smacked his lips in dissatisfaction. When I was paying attention, I stole the cigarette."

Miyake said that her father is an old smoker, and he must have cigarettes at work. If he finds that the cigarettes in the bag suddenly disappear after arriving at the company today, he will definitely go crazy.

"Come on, one for each, try it out."

Miyake said while unpacking, took out a cigarette from inside and handed it to Akiyama.Akiyama hesitated for a moment, but didn't take it.

"You good-for-nothing Kanon." Miyake snorted at her, then handed the cigarette in front of me, "Lianji, are you a man?"

It doesn't matter if it's a man or not.Underage smoking is against the law, no matter how out of bounds Miyake is, he should not do anything that violates the law.

"I don't think it's good." I refused. "Smoking doesn't do us any good, it only harms our health. Miyake had better not try it lightly."

"Ah...you two are so boring...!"

After being slammed, Miyake fell back with a bored expression on his face, lying in a large font on the floor of the gymnasium.

She looked up to the sky and sighed greatly.

Recently, because I was busy writing introductions for the club, the poetry club hardly produced any serious output.None of the three had any good works to submit, and the activities of publishing in newspapers and magazines entered a period of stagnation.Miyake said she felt the pressure virtually.

"Aren't the great poets and writers in the past all like this? Drinking alcohol can relieve depression, and smoking can relax the body and mind. Maybe if you do both, inspiration will come."

Indeed, many famous writers and poets in history had the habit of smoking and drinking too much. Few of them were not healthy physically and mentally. Some even died early due to excessive smoking and drinking.

"That can only be a negative teaching material." I said to Miyake, "We should..."

"There are no shoulds and shouldn'ts. Rules are made by people, and rules are broken by people themselves." Miyake interrupted me and said, "Lianji, I wanted to say it a long time ago, you are obviously very talented, why do you want to?" Hanging around with a guy like Sanada? Not only wasting my talents wasted, but I also became an unreasonable antique like him."

Genichiro said the same thing to me more than once.

"You are obviously not a rebellious person, why do you want to hang out with people like Miyake? Hanging out with that kind of person will only waste your talents, don't let yourself be depraved again!"

Although they are two people standing on opposite sides, the pace of Genichiro and Miyake is sometimes surprisingly consistent.In other words, both men have a terrible obsession with what they believe in.

Perhaps it is precisely because the definitions of freedom and bondage are too stubborn that these two people can't give in.

"I don't care." Miyake said, "I don't care about anything. I just want to live a more meaningful life. I don't care whether life is short or not, but whether it is wonderful or not."

After speaking, she sat up, took out the lighter from her schoolbag, and lit the cigarette in her hand.

As if some sacred ceremony was about to be performed, the three of them all fell silent at the same time, seeing Miyake's hand holding the cigarette slowly approaching his mouth.

She took a sip cautiously and carefully.

"Cough—! Cough cough—!"

The next second, Miyake choked his throat and coughed loudly, and the cigarette in his hand accidentally dropped to the ground.Akiyama quickly picked up the cigarette.

"Are you okay?" I asked Miyake, who was coughing like hell.

"Damn it, how could it be all right! No one sucked this stuff—!" She coughed and pounded her chest with her fist.

For some reason, seeing Miyake's appearance, Akiyama laughed silently.

She observed the cigarette she picked up from the ground, and then put it into her mouth with determination.

"Wait, wait...canon...this stuff doesn't taste good at all!"

But it was too late when Miyake made a move to stop him. Akiyama took a puff of cigarette, and then coughed desperately like Miyake.

After just taking two puffs, the pungent and unpleasant smell of smoke has already permeated the gymnasium.Looking at Miyake and Akiyama who were coughing and breathless, I suddenly felt as if I was excluded by them.

Miyake and Akiyama didn't force me to try smoking, but they both looked at me with funny eyes after smoking.

"This stuff is terrible, really." Miyake said to me with a smile, "but now that I wake up, I finally know why those old guys from hundreds of years ago liked this thing, because it stinks ! Even if you don’t want to wake up after smoking!”

The two of them were coughing and laughing, Qiushan couldn't help but reach out to wipe the tears from the corners of their eyes.I don't know if those are tears from coughing up or tears from laughing.

I often see unscrupulous teenagers squatting on the ground smoking on the side of the road. There is no doubt that those people are hopeless marginalized people in the eyes of me and Genichiro.People who smoke, steal, fight, play truant, hang around all day, think tattoos and puffs can make them look scary, and I have no sympathy for such people.

Trying to smoke is not to become these depraved people. I admit that there may be elements of curiosity and novelty in it, but whether you can control it well depends entirely on yourself.

I asked Miyake for a cigarette case and a lighter. She seemed to feel nothing when she lit the cigarette, but once it was in my hands, I felt that these things were unexpectedly heavy.

"If Genichiro knew that I did such a thing, he would definitely be furious."

I lit the cigarette with a very unfamiliar and clumsy movement.When the cigarette butt turned red, Miyake and Akiyama exchanged glances, and they seemed to be looking at me expectantly.

In this world, there are people who smoke very handsomely, and there are people who smoke poorly. If possible, I want to be the former.

I thought I could hold on when a puff of gray smoke came out of my mouth.But after only three seconds, I covered my mouth with my hand and started coughing uncontrollably.

Miyake and Akiyama burst out laughing when they saw how I was pretending to be calm but couldn't help showing my depression.

"Congratulations! You've grown up, boy."

Miyake stretched out his hand and gave me a loud high five who was coughing constantly.

Then she turned around and gave Qiu Shan a high-five. After the high-five, she held our hands like this, and the three sat on the ground in a circle.

"You don't have to be a smoker and a drinker to be a poet, but at least we did what the great old men did."

Some things do not mean that you learn to be bad if you try it, but after trying it, you find that it is really not suitable for you, so you can stay away from it.

The three of us never touched cigarettes after that, and Miyake threw the cigarettes and lighters he had stolen from her father into the grass by the river.Miyake said that maybe it's because we can't smoke that we can't be great poets.

But so what if we can’t become great poets, at least at this moment, we can still have paper and pen, and we can still do what we like to do.

We have never been tortured by war, nor have we experienced the hardships of poverty. We have experienced too little, and it is because we are young that we appear so innocent and reckless.

——"Cast a cold eye, watch life, watch death. Knight, forward!"

On the way home from school, Miyake snatched Akiyama's notebook and read out the poems she wrote on it.Akiyama smiled and looked at Miyake who raised his fist and shouted "I want to become a knight" in the setting sun. The three walked slowly along the river dam in the afterglow of the setting sun.

Now I can tell you why I wanted to put that sentence on my tombstone.

On the Irish grassland filled with Celtic freedom and stirring soul, there is a knight who rides alone. He does not move for life or death. , just looking out at the endless sky with a firm gaze under the heavy helmet.

I wish I could be that person.Either after death or now.