do not speak

The crimson skin has the luster of pearls, mixed with the shimmering light of yellow sand... My claws are like diamonds, my teeth are like saws, and my tail is like a javelin that keeps throwing, hitting me in front, back, left, and right.

Flaubert The Temptation of Saint Anthony

After several days of continuous rotation, I finally had a small holiday before Christmas.Wei Huaiming came to see that Sun Kaichen was in a bad mood, so he asked him to go to a hot spring in advance, and just after packing up, he saw Zhao Zheng coming in with a bunch of lunch boxes, thinking that there was no one at home, so he ate at the police station.Just in time for Qin Yan to come out of the Appraisal Department, he heard that he had something to say to himself, and directly invited Qin Yan to go to the hot spring with them tomorrow. If there is anything to do, we will talk about it later, Zhao Zheng heard the word "hot spring" and hurried Stretching his face out of the lunch box, he yelled to add him, and he responded instantly.

So when Sun Kaichen opened the door the next day and saw a group of big men soaking in the hot spring, he subconsciously tightened his bathrobe.

"Your company... isn't it, the police station is engaged in team building?" Sun Kaichen looked at Wei Huaiming who monopolized the corner of the hot spring in confusion, "I'm not in the habit of taking a bath with a group of big men."

Wei Huaiming also had a headache. He didn't understand how the matter changed from asking Sun Kaichen out alone for a chat to the company's team building and bringing him by the way.After thinking about it, I paid for them and opened another room for them. Qin Yan originally wanted to go out, but Wei Huaiming pressed him down: "Professor Qin, you should stay, you are better at comforting people." Qin Yan subconsciously hid He opened his hand, moved it to the side, and said in a gentle voice, "Just call me Qin Yan."

Wei Huaiming felt a little embarrassed by his small movements. After thinking about it, he told others that he likes men, and it is really not good to engage in some intimate movements, so he climbed back to his corner and rubbed against Sun Kaichen. , the latter kicked him impatiently, Wei Huaiming kicked him back not to be outdone, and the two fought back and forth.

Qin Yan was silently sipping his drink. He didn't want to pay attention to their childish behavior, but he couldn't stop looking there.Wei Huaiming didn't wear a bathrobe, so he took a non-waterproof bath towel around it, which was already soaked in water and stuck to his body, outlining the curves of his waist and abdomen, and his eyes were filled with the sense of muscles that he had exercised all year round.After Qin Yan glanced twice, the base of his ears turned red. He took two mouthfuls of drink without looking away, and choked again without paying attention. The sound of coughing attracted the attention of the two people over there. Wearing the thin cloth, I felt the touch behind me, as if it had been patted directly on my heart, and the red color at the base of my ears quickly spread to my cheeks.

God, what kind of torture is this.

Seeing that his face was about to burn, Wei Huaiming added fuel to the fire: "Qin Jiao...Qin Yan, are you hot? Just take off the heat." What Wei Huaiming thought was that everyone was wearing swimming trunks, so there was no need to be so particular, but The words he said against Qin Yan's ear mixed with the heat of the hot spring, and when it fell into his ears, it became a smell.Qin Yan tightened the bathrobe and moved it to the side. While saying no need, he stood up and said to go out to get some air. After closing the door stiffly with his hands and feet, he was relieved.

The hot spring was too hot, he had to take a shower.

After watching Qin Yan leave, Sun Kaichen moved closer to Wei Huaiming: "Hey, are you interested in this kid?"

Wei Huaiming glared at him: "Get out, I don't like this one." Sun Kaichen clicked his tongue and said that you said you didn't like this one when you met it, and you said you didn't like it when you met that one. What type do you like?I once suspected that you liked women.

Wei Huaiming glanced at him inscrutablely: "Buddha's saying can't be said." In fact, it's not that Wei Huaiming hasn't questioned his own sexuality, but he didn't feel it when he dated a few girlfriends when he was a teenager. When I was playing around, there was a reaction. Wei Huaiming, who was eighteen years old, sat on the bed in the dormitory that night and read several different types of study materials, then meditated all night, and came out with his mother the next day.

Wei Huaiming's mother beat him up for this matter, and told him not to go out if he didn't understand. He was so unconvinced, and neither of them talked to the other. They kept fighting until his father came back, and the couple discussed it. After a while, he said to take him to see a psychiatrist. After coming out of the psychological consultation room, he saw his father sitting on a stool with a cigarette dangling in the air. Seeing him coming out, he directly asked, "Have you figured it out?"

Wei Huaiming said that I figured it out, I really like men.

Old Comrade Wei stood up, took advantage of his height, and puffed a puff of smoke on top of his head, and punched him in the stomach, hitting him directly against the wall.

"Do you understand?"

Wei Huaiming was beaten and bumped again, and after a while he wiped the blood from the corner of his mouth with his hand, and glared back at him: "You fucking have the ability to beat me to death. As long as you let me get out of this door alive, I will follow someone else." If you say I like men, what the hell is wrong with me, Wei Huaiming, who likes men?"

Later, I heard from his mother that he was carried out.

Every time his mother recalled the scene at that time, she felt lingering fear, touched Wei Huaiming's head and sighed: "I thought it would be enough for your father to hit you twice so that your memory will be long, but I didn't expect him to dare to beat you to death. It took several people to pull him away, and I went over to touch him, good guy, he is almost out of breath..." Mrs. Wei did not forget to add a sentence after telling his history of humiliation with emotion: "From At that time, I decided, don't say I like men, I don't care if you like cats or dogs."

So Wei Huaiming has succeeded in coming out of the closet.

"Your father is really cruel." Sun Kaichen sighed, "If my father..."

"If your dad would just find you a few young men who fit his aesthetics, we'll go on a blind date for you." Wei Huaiming snatched a glass of wine from him and poured it into his mouth, feeling a little bitter.

Sun Kaichen envied him for having a mother since he was a child, and also envied that his father was a policeman, but why didn't Wei Huaiming, who grew up being beaten since childhood, not envy him?Sun Kaichen tasted what he said just now, turned around and poured a glass of wine, and touched Wei Huaiming: "Brother Ming, I figured it out."

"I want to change my mind and start a new life."

Wei Huaiming's hand holding the cup trembled, and he poured it on him with a face full of contempt.

Qin Yan felt refreshed after taking a shower, and was not in a hurry to go back, so he simply walked around to admire the venue.What Wei Huaiming was looking for was an artificial hot spring. The venue is not too big, but there are many forks in the huts. Often, when you go to a place that seems to be a dead end, you can find another path. The compartments are all designed in a poetic way, and there is a small wooden sign on the outside of each room with the name of the house written on it. Qin Yan thought it was interesting to look at each room.He has always had a good sense of direction, and he turned around in a short time. After walking back to the original point, he looked at the dead end behind the shower room and frowned again.

He walked here at the beginning, and changed to another road after he found that it was a dead end, but after walking all over, he found that there was only this dead end in the entire venue.

Qin Yan walked over and knocked on the bamboo wall in disbelief, it was empty.

A waiter in a nearby cubicle happened to see it, and came to remind him that this was a dead end, and politely asked him if he was lost. Qin Yan shook his head, looked at the wall again, and declined the waiter's kindness. Turned back to the compartment.

The waiter watched him go away before flashing into the cubicle just now. The voice-activated light dimmed, and was turned on again by the sound of coughing from somewhere.

A few people chatted for a while, until Zhao Zheng next door ran over and said that he was going to be dehydrated, and Wei Huaiming decided to go back home.

Zhao Zheng was able to kill him with great difficulty, and refused to let it go. He clamored to sing. Sun Kaichen drank a few more glasses of wine and started booing.The quarrel between the two of them was responded by the crowd of onlookers, so a group of people appeared in the KTV room an hour later.

Wei Huaiming pushed away the microphone that was handed to his lips, and shouted to Qin Yan who was sitting on one side of the sofa: "Professor Qin! Don't you have something to tell me!" Qin Yan's ears were full of ghosts crying and howling He only saw Wei Huaiming open his mouth but didn't hear what he said, and put his hands next to his ears to indicate that he didn't hear.

Wei Huaiming simply grabbed the microphone from Sun Kaichen next to him, and repeated again: "Don't you have something to say to me!"

The people present suddenly fell silent when he yelled at him, and they all followed his line of sight to look at Qin Yan.

This scene made him feel in a daze that he was about to confess.

Qin Yan laughed to himself in his heart, and looked into his bright eyes: "It's not convenient to say it here."

A group of elders suddenly started booing again, which made Wei Huaiming feel that Qin Yan was going to confess his love.

"No... If it's not convenient, go to a convenient place..." He didn't know what he was talking about, but he felt that Qin Yan's attitude towards him was indeed a bit vague. If there is a problem, solve it as soon as possible. He has a good impression of this kid and wants to find out what he thinks.

Qin Yan had no choice but to say, "Then go outside and talk about it."

The two went out with their own thoughts, and saw the smiling waiter in the corridor and thought it was inappropriate, so they turned to the toilet. As soon as they walked to the door of the toilet, they heard the sound of flushing in several compartments, and felt that the toilet was not suitable either. , simply went out of the hall, and found a dark corner nearby to exchange ideas.

"Captain Wei..."

"Professor Qin..."

The two spoke at the same time, and both wanted the other to speak first, and the scene suddenly fell into embarrassment.

After being polite for a long time, Qin Yan spoke first.

"I found something." Even though he was in the corner, he was still afraid that someone would see him, so he leaned close to Wei Huaiming and handed his hand to him. From a distance, he looked like a pair of close lovers.

Wei Huaiming's heart tightened. He was nervous about what he was going to say next, but suddenly a grainy feeling came from his hand.Qin Yan put his mouth close to Wei Huaiming's ear, and his voice was so soft that only the two of them could hear: "I found drugs in the room where corpses were dismembered."