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Seeing Yin Li's expression seemed to be hesitating, Huo Zhi stuffed the notebook into the medicine box very understandingly: "It's okay, I'm not very curious." After finishing speaking, he deliberately walked up to Yin Li, "Ga Beng " He took a bite of the apple in his hand.

In fact, it's nothing to look at now, he and Huo Zhi have already been honest with each other, but Yin Li still feels shy and numb when he thinks about some of the things he wrote in his diary.

When people are no longer trapped by the past, those downcast emotions can't help but make people curl their fingers.

Yin Li turned it over once by himself, very hypocritical, and couldn't stand it at all.

Huo Zhi entered the living room, put two cough medicines next to a cup of hot water, then grabbed the phone on the coffee table and flicked it, looking extremely lonely.

Yin Li took out the notebook and put it on his lap: "Look, don't blame me for indigestion for a while, I will cook."

Huo Zhi turned a page, and the first line he saw read: "June 27, [-], overcast. 』

"Is this your diary?"

Yin Li was biting an apple beside him, and nodded.

"Then I won't read it." Huo Zhi closed the book and returned it to Yin Li.

"Why didn't you watch it again?"

"There is also privacy between lovers."

"Oh, then do you have any secrets that I don't know?" Yin Li threw the gnawed fruit core into the trash can, and looked at Huo Zhi with a smile.

"Hey, at this time you will draw inferences." Huo Zhi stuffed the pills on the coffee table into his hands, "Come on, open your mouth and take the medicine."

"This medicine is to be taken after meals. I've already told you that I'm going to cook first."

"Let me do it, the oily smoke will choke you again." Huo Zhi was about to stand up after saying that.

Yin Li moved faster than him, and he pressed the other party on the sofa first: "I told you to see, I was so curious that I was dying, but I pretended to be magnanimous."

Huo Zhi didn't refuse this time, but pulled Yin Li to sit beside him: "I'm not pretending to be magnanimous, but I'm really curious. The master isn't here, so I always feel like I'm peeping, so you come with me." Look, order takeaway for a while."

This thing is not a world famous best-selling novel, it is necessary for two people to read it together?Yin Li was full of troubles in his heart, but he still sat obediently and didn't move.

As soon as he opened it and saw the first two paragraphs, Huo Zhi couldn't laugh anymore.

"Today I still couldn't make up my mind to really die, so I went to the supermarket to buy some yogurt and put it in the refrigerator.The TV series I'm watching recently will update two episodes after ten o'clock.Don't die, let's not die today. 』

"I often think about death seriously because of a small thing. I have raised a pot of plants and died, and I want to die with me. A natural disaster happened on the other side of the earth, and I want to die with me. 』

Even though he already knew that Yin Li was willing to reveal the past to himself at this moment, it proved that he no longer took these things to heart, but Huo Zhi's heart still tightened suddenly.So he raised one arm and put it on Yin Li's shoulder, feeling the warm body temperature of the people around him, and he felt at ease.

"I feel like I can't sleep anymore, I have nightmares every night, and then wake up with tingling eardrums, I might as well die."The only thing better than Ms. Meng is that he can still know that he is out of control, just like if a mental patient knows that he is a mental patient, then he is not actually terminally ill. 』

"Yin Li, stop thinking about it, okay?Go to sleep, if there are only a few sheep, let there be one. 』

"How can I be actively living while actively wanting to die.I went to see a psychiatrist today. I actually wanted to ask if Ms. Meng’s illness could be cured, but she couldn’t speak, and she didn’t express anything. Instead, she was “interrogated” by the doctor about a lot of things about herself. That Dr. Song was very interesting. It's not like the crappy doctor in the school hospital before, who only told people all kinds of truths. When he came up, he said that I was sick.Even more ridiculous, he said that I can be cured. 』

Huo Zhi remembered the time when Yin Li had a temper because of jealousy, the two of them were sitting in the bathtub, and Yin Li vaguely mentioned to see a psychiatrist, so he wasn't just joking.

"Data show that more than one-third of patients with panic disorder suffer from major depression.So which of these two diseases is more uncomfortable? 』

……

It quickly turned to [-], but the content above was still those words that made Huo Zhi extremely worried.

"Dr. Song said today that I am too thin, I should pay attention to eating three meals on time, and the nutrition should be balanced. He also advised me to eat more meat.If not, can I die earlier? 』

"I only think that you are born with a weak body and really can't digest meat. I don't think you don't want to live. Yin Li, you will really hurt people's hearts."

"I just developed a bad habit. The meat you feed me never tastes good to me."

Huo Zhi stopped turning over the paper, took out his mobile phone and started ordering meals, Yin Li tilted his head and glanced twice, the screen was full of all kinds of meat, he reminded in a low voice: "Nutrition should be balanced."

Huo Zhi glared at him after he finished speaking, and he dodged back resentfully, watching Huo Zhi add a lot of green vegetables, he couldn't hold back, and said again: "Too much."

Then Huo Zhi's eyebrows furrowed, and Yin Li quickly said, "Okay, I'll eat more."

After ordering the meal, Huo Zhi took Yin Li's hand and continued to browse.Slowly, finally saw the content of [-], Huo Zhi thought, he was about to appear.

Yin Li thought, Huo Zhi is about to appear, what kind of public execution scene is this.

"There is only half of the song left to be delivered. The company has sent a new manager who has just graduated from university. If he dies at this time, it will cast a shadow on his career." 』

This word appeared so much that Yin Li felt that he almost didn't know the word "death".

"I met that strange fan again in the nursing home today. He even showed me his playlist. Six of the ten songs are songs I wrote a long time ago. They are all not very famous folk songs.This bastard's ear taste is really weird and unique, obviously he looks like he likes the type of hardcore rap music. 』

"Strange fans? You bastard?" Huo Zhi read out the words on it.

Yin Li couldn't see, and wanted to escape, but was held tightly by Huo Zhi's hand.

"Huo Zhi said he liked me.It's so strange that someone as boring as me is still liked by him.How could you fall in love with yourself?A person with such good conditions, what kind of object does he want? 』

"It's actually very noisy outside, but the moment I put on the earphones, the sound of music magically isolates many troubles in reality.The ID name "his name is Eleven Paintings" sent an English song he sang himself. It's very strange. It sounds empty when he sings it, and the tone is very different from that of Huo Zhi. Why does he subconsciously feel that People are Huo Zhi.I'm afraid it's him, but I hope it's him. 』

"I may not be born to learn how to love someone. Giving Huo Zhi hope is the worst thing I have ever done.He clearly knows that he has a weird personality, a rotten body, and is cold and stubborn all day long. For such a person, when he talks about love and love, he may fall in love with no one in his heart. It doesn't matter. It's fine if you don't. 』

Huo Zhi suddenly understood, in fact, Yin Li had been tempted a long time ago, the way he expressed his love was straightforward and precise, it was impossible for Yin Li not to understand, he just didn't dare to understand.

He raised his hand and rubbed the back of his head, feeling: "Stupid thing."

Yin Li felt a little drowsy when he saw it, and was shocked by Huo Zhi's surprise.

"I shouldn't lose my temper, I regret it to death.For an unimportant person to have an unpleasant fight with him, with such a stupid mouth, he is about to lose his ability to speak.Anyway, I am a stain on Huo Zhi, if he hadn't met me, there wouldn't be so many troublesome follow-ups. 』

"Huo Zhi said that he can rely on him, is it really possible?Forget it, don't make such wishful thinking and hurtful assumptions.Only children have the capital to pursue happiness and avoid suffering, but I have never been a child since I was ten years old. 』

Looking further down, Huo Zhi suddenly discovered that in the past few years, this Dr. Song was actually the person who accompanied Yin Li the longest.

"Doctor Song asked me to write something that made me happy recently. I didn't want to write it at first, but half an hour later, it was filled with the name of "Huo Zhi", which was so strange.Dr. Song asked me who "Huo Zhi" was. I said it was the cat I raised recently, but he stared at me for a long time, and he was probably spotted. So why did he lie in front of his psychiatrist.I hate Huo Zhi! 』

The exclamation point was also used, and Yin Li began to become cute, Huo Zhi thought.

"It's the first time I came into contact with this civilization called "Cat Master". I wonder if it's because of the surname "Huo". Huo Chongyang has a very good personality, just like that person.It is lying obediently beside me now, with its front paws resting on my feet. 』

This is the period when the cat was fostered at Yin Li's house.

"The doctor said that my depression was already very mild, and he suddenly congratulated me on "Long Jiu Jiu". I suspected for a moment that he was not a doctor but a fortune teller. 』

"Huo Zhi's lips were actually cool, and seemed to have a faint sweet taste.If Huo Zhi is a verb, then that word must be poison, otherwise, why, until eighteen hours later, I still think about this kiss. 』

"Today I suddenly started to like red, because I want to receive the red string from Huo Zhi. 』

"I decided to stop the medicine, throw away all sleeping pills and antipsychotic drugs, and delete Dr. Song's WeChat account.Over the years, he really lied to me a lot of money. 』

Looking at the date, it was already the day after Huo Zhi moved in.

The content of the diary came to an abrupt end here, and Huo Zhi turned to a blank page at the back, as if he still couldn't finish his thoughts: "Why didn't you write it? The back is so cute."

Yin Li got out of Huo Zhi's arms, raised his arms and stretched his waist: "Most of the chatter in the diary is because of unhappiness, now you understand why I don't write."

"Then are you sure now that I have an earth-shattering affection for you?"

"Well, homosexuals like us are luckier than others after all, because it's really difficult to find a good-looking and likable one among billions of people."

When eating, Yin Li was very melancholy looking at the table full of dishes, so he had to invite ten Huo Chongyang to eat together.

Huo Zhi put down his chopsticks suddenly, Yin Li thought he finally realized that he had ordered too much food, but he only heard the person say: "Suddenly want to see this Dr. Song."

"..." Yin Li pursed his lips, wanted to ask but didn't dare to ask, "You can't be..."

Huo Zhi knew what Yin Li was thinking by looking at his expression: "I'm not jealous!"

"Then you want to help me get back the money he cheated me all these years?"

"I just want to thank him." It was true that Huo Zhi had a slight taste in his heart, and his gratitude to this doctor he had never met was also true.

The contents of the diary spanned several years. This night, out of nowhere, when Huo Zhi put down the diary and saw Yin Li again, he felt a feeling of being lost and found again. Not only Huo Zhi had this feeling, but Yin Li also had this feeling.

If Yin Li really made up his mind at so many moments of wanting to die, if he didn't see Yin Li when he went out to work that day, if Yin Li flinched a few times and he flinched too... Huo Zhi realized at this moment , it turns out that they have so many ifs that they will lose each other.But now they are still together, Huo Zhi rubbed the old cover of the diary, thinking, it's great, we have overcome so many things if we become each other's pillow.

After closing the diary and putting it on the bedside table, Huo Zhi touched Yin Li's spine one by one. This person is very thin, but still very attractive. That's great, Huo Zhi repeated in his heart.

"Insure your body, Yin Li." He said without thinking.

"I have, personal accident insurance." Yin Li looked up at him with a gentler expression than ever before.

"No more suicidal thoughts."

"Can you stop talking about this?" Yin Li felt more and more ashamed as he thought about it, why was he poisoned, why was he still thinking about that kiss after eighteen hours, it was too hypocritical, "I don't want to die at all now, Really, I won’t see you when I die.”

Huo Zhi felt that Yin Li was embarrassed at this moment, and the way he wanted to end the topic was also first-class cute.

But he still wanted to ask, as if picking out words for reading comprehension: "If you see me, you won't be unhappy if you're with me, right?"

"Ah."

"You said that you were not born to love others, did I teach you that?"

"Ah."

"Does that only love me?"

"Ah."

Huo Zhi was finally satisfied, and fell back on the pillow. He put one hand around Yin Li's thin wrist: "To be honest, you have to go for a physical examination. Our unit organizes a physical examination at least once a year. You Your unit won’t organize it for you, but your family will arrange it for you, okay?”

Yin Li didn't like the hospital, but he knew that Huo Zhi was doing it for his own good, not to mention that he felt sorry for his life, so he nodded and agreed to go this Saturday.

When he went to the hospital a few days later, Yin Li's cough had healed.The results of the physical examination at the hospital would not be available until three days later, so Huo Zhi asked the old Chinese doctor who used to take care of Huo Fu's body to help Yin Li feel his pulse. The pulse showed that Yin Li was obviously weak. Immunocompromised.Huo Zhi thought he was thin before, but now he knows why Yin Li loves getting sick so much.

On the way back, Yin Li took the initiative to bring Meng Yongqian to see a psychiatrist, Huo Zhi thought for a long time before answering him: "Yin Li, you haven't looked for it for so many years, it may be a little late, but it's okay, Let's make an agreement in advance, don't feel bad if our mother can't be cured, take your time."

"I know, I just wanted to try."

Huo Zhi immediately began to wonder if he knew a reliable psychiatrist, and then suddenly thought of Dr. Song.

"Why don't you go ask that Doctor Song first?"

Yin Li agreed, and leaned over to enter a new address in the navigation.

After meeting, Song Zheyan was not surprised at Huo Zhi's appearance: "You must be the cat that Yin Li raised, right?"

Huo Zhi smiled helplessly, and shook hands with him: "Yes, thank you Doctor Song for your help for so many years."

"It's not help, it's service. It's all right to use money to do things."

"Anyway, thank you."

"Well, the patient himself didn't seem to appreciate it, so he deleted me when there were two courses of treatment left."

Yin Li stood behind, a little embarrassed: "It was Huo Zhi who didn't let me contact other men, he was very jealous."

"..." Huo Zhi and Song Zheyan looked at each other, "Yes, I'm very jealous."

Song Zheyan smiled, and put the pen in his pocket: "What are you planning to do today? It seems that my service does not include seeing patients to show affection."

"It's Yin Li's mother..." Huo Zhi introduced the situation one by one, and asked him directly if he could be cured.

Dr. Song didn't say anything dead, saying that he wanted to see the patient first.So Huo Zhi simply took him to the suburbs, and now it seems impossible to take Meng Yongqian to a strange place.

After Song Zheyan went, he made a preliminary and simple assessment, and told Yin Li and Huo Zhi his prediction.

After sending the doctor away, on the way back, Huo Zhi couldn't hold back: "Yin Li, Doctor Song is very handsome and very humorous."

"so what?"

"You haven't fallen in love with him for so many years?"

Yin Libai glanced at him: "Why don't you see a doctor too? Or just apply for a family membership card with Dr. Song?"

After listening, Huo Zhi turned his head and went to enjoy himself alone.

After returning home, Yin Li sat beside Meng Yongqian, silent for a long time.

This woman used to hold him tenderly in her arms and tell stories softly when she was a child, but now that Yin Li is almost 1.8 meters tall, she can barely hug his shoulders with her stretched arms, and she has not had time to hug such a tall man Yin Li went crazy.

Before she had time to teach Yin Li how to love herself and others, she went crazy, so Yin Li inexplicably looked isolated from the world, and almost inexplicably missed Huo Zhi.

Yin Li lowered his head and wiped his eyes, raised his head and pulled her into his arms, choked up and said, "Mom, I'm sorry, I should have taken you to the doctor earlier."