After marrying a wealthy family, I just want to start a career[Transmigration Book]

In the past, for fear of causing him more harm, he chose to endure this feeling.

I hope to give him the right to know, give him the greatest respect, and let him make the final decision when everything is clear.

If he can still accept him at that time, he will open his arms to him without hesitation.

But now, he has been severely injured and needs his healing, so the previous persistence is no longer so meaningful.

He eagerly spit out a fiery heart to him, but he turned his head to avoid his kiss.

He was pressed against the metal anti-theft door by him, the cold metal on his back became warm, but his heart became colder and more painful.

If it was before, if he took the initiative in front of him, Feng Yun didn't know how happy he would be.

But now...

Ning An pursed her lips and moved her hands away from his face, feeling sad, embarrassment and sadness came to her heart together.

His slender fingers slowly clenched into fists, but they didn't leave his body, just resting his wrist loosely on his shoulder.

He has no experience, and after being rejected once, he doesn't know how to continue, and he doesn't even know whether to use this method to comfort him.

He looked down at the toes of the two in silence, and his face gradually turned pale.

He felt sorry for him, but there was nothing he could do. He could only use this method to accompany him quietly.

Although Feng Yun avoided his kiss, she didn't push him away either, she just pressed her forehead against his neck and remained silent.

In fact, the moment he avoided it, his heart ached sharply.

A person like him, when did he take the initiative?

He didn't know how much courage he had to take the initiative to kiss himself, and he didn't know how many psychological obstacles he had to overcome to say such hot words of love.

But he was really afraid, afraid of him just to comfort himself!

He even doubted himself, because he was bleeding like that, so he didn't deserve to be loved at all, so even Feng Ran couldn't love him.

Even Feng Ran can't love him, let alone others?What qualifications does he have to ask for love from others?

Feng Yun was extremely uncomfortable. His world was full of dark clouds, lightning and thunder, and the torrential rain engulfed him. He couldn't breathe, so he unconsciously hurt the person he cared about the most.

But he still needs love, the more he needs it, the more he is hungry.

He could feel his embarrassment and bewilderment, and he expected him to kiss him again, but he moved his hand away from his cheek.

A piece of Feng Yun's heart was empty, and the pain was piercing.

"I'm sorry," his voice was muffled, coming from his neck, "I shouldn't be angry with you, I just..."

I just don't think anyone will love me anymore...

Before he could say anything, Ning An's embrace wrapped him warmly, blocking the wind and rain for him.

Ning An hugged him, but didn't say a word, but gently stroked his back with his palms, asking him to pour out all the bitterness in his heart, and let out all the rotten things in his heart.

"I'm in so much pain, Ning An, it really hurts."

"I know, everyone will be hurt, you say it," Ning An said: "It won't hurt if you say it."

"I just didn't expect that I was such a kind of existence," he sighed softly, with a trembling ending: "Others have feelings for a cat and a dog, why would she treat me like this?"

"In the past, no matter what, I didn't doubt it. I thought she would love me to some extent, but the way was too crazy and extreme." A drop of hot liquid penetrated the thin shirt fabric and scalded onto his skin. Ning An Holding his arm tightly.

Feng Yun calmed down for a while and then said: "She said that Liu Qing had intervened in her relationship with Chu Yunhe. I have always felt sorry for her, and I tried my best to persuade myself to bear it no matter how difficult it was, because she is my mother, and we ...I feel sorry for her..."

He raised his head, his eyes were bloodshot, he looked at Ning An and said, "A person like me shouldn't have been born in the first place?"

"No, Feng Yun," Ning An said softly, "If you hadn't been born, then I wouldn't have met you."

If you don't meet him, he is a lonely soul.

"I don't need sympathy points." Feng Yun's voice was hoarse from the smoke, his Adam's apple rolled, and he said something that he couldn't accept: "Even without me, you will meet others."

Ning An looked at him quietly, he didn't say anything, but pushed him away after a while, and went into the kitchen alone.

Feng Yun was stunned, his embrace was empty, the place where the skin was touching and warm had been suddenly empty.

The cold air rushed over, penetrated his chest cavity, penetrated his holed heart.

Let him be cold from the outside to the inside, and from the inside to the outside.

Ning An came out of the kitchen, holding a bottle of wine in one hand and two empty glasses in the other, his face looked extremely pale under the light.

He pointed to the sofa and said calmly, "Sit down."

Feng Yun stood there watching him, but did not go over.

Ning An didn't greet him anymore, but poured a glass of wine on his own, raised his slender neck, rolled his Adam's apple, and drank it clean in one gulp.

Then he poured another glass, and drank it in one gulp just like the last one.

He drank too fast, and the liquid slid down the corner of his lips, leaving a wet trace.

He finally looked at him and said, "Feng Yun, since I've been with you, I haven't said or done anything vain, have I? It's not because of sympathy that I will completely dedicate myself to sacrifice." As for my kind of person, I know that my strength is not so great that I can get people out of the sea of ​​suffering by myself, of course, I am not that great either."

As he spoke, he went to pour a third glass of wine, and when the glass touched his lips, Feng Yun grabbed his wrist.

Ning An looked up at him: "Feng Yun, I like you. It has never been related to who you are, and there has never been such a thing as sympathy. I only have love and distress for you."

Feng Yun pursed the corners of her lips, and reached out to wipe the wine stains from the corners of Ning An's lips.

Ning An pointed to the seat next to him: "Sit down, Feng Yun, I thought it might not be appropriate to say those words today, but now that I think about it, since it's already like this, it probably can't be worse, do you still want to hear it?"

If Feng Yun knew that he was worse than him, probably he wouldn't be so sad, right?

He lowered his eyes and waited for Feng Yun's answer, and when he looked up again, there was already a ray of smile in his eyes, he even poured a glass of wine for him, and calmly handed it to him.

"I'll listen." Feng Yun pursed his lips, forcefully pulling his thoughts out of today's pain: "I want to hear everything about you, good or bad."

Ning An nodded, then smiled, but there was a bit of bitterness in the smile.

He told Feng Yun everything about himself, without reservation.

He didn't even look at Feng Yun's expression, he only spoke little by little, until he finished speaking, he let out a soft breath.

This matter hidden in the deepest part of his heart has never been known to anyone, and at the earliest time, he could not imagine that one day he would tell others.

Too incredible, secret and painful.

But today, he said it, and after he said it, it was far easier than he imagined.

In this world, there is finally a person who knows where he came from and what he is.

He lowered his head, waiting for Feng Yun's verdict, everything is fine, he can bear anything.

He didn't know how long it had passed, and the strange thing was that he was not in a hurry, because this might be the last time the two of them spent together like this, and he was not in a hurry to let them pass, even if they stayed at this moment, it didn't matter.

It's just that Feng Yun may not be willing, if he is not, then forget it.

He thought about it endlessly, until a hand reached out and held his hand. The hand was cold, but it held him very hard.

It took Feng Yun a while to make a sound: "Ning An..."

His voice felt dry, and Ning An even wanted to ask him if he needed a glass of water first.

Of course he couldn't ask like that, he just waited patiently for his next words, but there was nothing.

"Do you believe it?" He raised his eyes and smiled, looked at Feng Yun and asked, "What I said."

Feng Yun nodded, looking at his gaze like a dark sea covered with black clouds: "Why don't I believe what you say?"

"Then when I said I love you," Ning An felt a little uncomfortable, but smiled: "Why don't you believe it?"

He stood up: "Feng Yun, think about it carefully, if you can't accept..."

"It doesn't matter, I can understand." He paused for a moment: "I rented a house two days ago, and I can move out at any time, so you don't have to think so much. If it affects your thinking, I will move out tomorrow." It's okay to go out."

He looked at the sky outside: "Today is too late."

In the next second, his hand was grabbed by Feng Yun. Feng Yun was caught in the huge impact, and when his deep eyebrows were raised, he rarely showed some dazed emotion.

But when he heard the words "move out", he was still splashed by a basin of ice water.

Even though it was spring, he felt that he had fallen into deep winter.

Like a naked baby thrown into the deep winter snow, unable to protect itself.

He grabbed him, pulled him into his arms with all his strength, kissed his soft hair with his lips, and said after a long time: "I can't accept it."

Ning An thought, sure enough, few people can accept this kind of thing, and it's normal for Feng Yun not to accept it.

"I can't accept that you have suffered so much." Feng Yun hugged him even tighter, because he felt his body temperature, he seemed to come alive at this moment: "Abandoned by the whole world, to a place that doesn't belong to me , not recognized by the family here, and married me in order to avoid them...you have suffered so much..."

He has suffered so much, and he has seen many of them with his own eyes, and he finally fully understands why he is completely different from what he investigated.

His voice choked up: "Ning An, you're only 19 years old, I haven't noticed it all this time."

He was so distressed, he forgot his misfortune, and hugged him tightly into his arms.

Ning An's tears burst out suddenly, he thought he had already become numb, but because Feng Yun cared about him and loved him, he couldn't help feeling sad.

"Feng Yun, I miss home so much, I miss my father, I miss my mother, and I miss Ning Ke," Ning An said softly with a nasal voice, "But after I leave, I will miss you again."

"I don't know when I will go back, or if I will never be able to go back, Feng Yun," Ning An said, "It's not that I don't love you, I'm just afraid that you won't be able to accept it when the time comes, so I need to think about it..."

"I understand!" Feng Yun closed his eyes: "No matter where you go in the future, there will be a home waiting for you. Here, I am your home."

Ning An raised his head, his eyelashes were wet in locks, and his eyes were black and bright with tears.

Feng Yun kissed his eyes: "I'm afraid of losing you, but I'm even more afraid of not cherishing you when I can get you."

Ning An held his face again, his brain was numb, and he couldn't even hear what he said, but he knew what he said: "Feng Yun, if you were not born, I would be a lonely ghost."

The words "lonely ghost" pierced Feng Yun's heart severely. He bit his lip with his teeth, using physical pain to drive away the psychological pain.

Ning An rubbed his lips, and said something that Feng Yun had said to him many times: "Feng Yun, I want to kiss you, is it okay?"

Before he finished speaking, his lips fell between Feng Yun's. Pain, despair, and heartache for the other party, all emotions were entangled in this kiss.

Ning An originally thought that their first kiss would be gentle and sweet, but she didn't expect it to be crazy and cruel and bloody.

(****************)

After everything was over, he took him into his arms and kissed him long and tenderly.

Ning An was a little annoyed, because he didn't use all the things he learned on purpose.

"What's wrong?" Feng Yun found out what was wrong with him, and said with a soft smile, "Did I do something wrong?"

"No." Ning An held his face and looked at it: "Why do you know everything?"

Obviously it was because he was too young that he felt that he had rich experience, but Feng Yun still showed some joy in his eyes, and was extremely happy because he was praised: "Do you want to know?"

Ning An didn't speak, pursed his lips and traced his thick and slender eyebrows with his fingertips.

Feng Yun's expression became obscured: "I often think about you doing very bad things, and imagine doing very bad things to you, it's crazy..."

He bit his lip and asked him: "Are you afraid? I'm just that crazy, with Feng Ran's blood flowing in my veins, will you be afraid of me?"

Ning An is not afraid, he only feels sorry for him, for his self-denial, and for his cautiousness.

"Don't be afraid, because I know you are different from her, she will hurt you, but you will not hurt me," he kissed his lips tenderly: "You don't have to bear it anymore, I am here, you can have whatever you want .”

Feng Yun closed his eyes, his Adam's apple rolled, his eyes were sore, even he himself hated and was afraid of the side, Ning An said he was not afraid, he said that he didn't have to bear it anymore, he was here.

At this moment, he could no longer deny that he clearly felt the taste of being loved from him. Happiness and sweetness seemed a little superficial, and he was more moved.

He hugged him tightly, then whispered in his ear: "If you don't come, I'll be a lonely ghost."

The author has something to say: (****************) 3 words, see Weibo, guide AO[-]

I asked a few wives, and they said a lot, it’s still AO3, I will post the link on Weibo, it’s very simple

感谢在2019-11-1619:28:55~2019-11-1714:37:11期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

Thanks to the little angels who cast the landmines: Chang'an Chengguan, Lin Nai Liang Ran, and Da Da, did you update 1 of them today;

Thanks to the little angel of the irrigation nutrient solution: 10 bottles if you don’t know or don’t know; 7 bottles by the window silhouette; 2 bottles from Qinyuan;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!