married her first and then fell in love

"You should tell her."

Ye Jin became silent.

"I know, this is not an easy task." Ji Shuang put down the cup in her hand and said calmly.

Perhaps in the eyes of ordinary people, it seems that it is not difficult to say something, but from the patient's point of view, it is not the case.The reason why psychological defects can evolve into a morbid disorder is largely due to long-term self-enclosure and emotional repression, and excessive lack of communication.

It takes a lot of courage for a person who has been self-enclosed for a long time to bare-naked-naked the sensitivity and fragility that has been buried deep in his heart.

Ji Shuang has come into contact with too many cases like this, and she has seen too many people like Ye Jin, who seem to be extremely good and powerful, but are so fragile inside.

Right now, Ji Shuang thinks this is a good opportunity for treatment, because facing the person she likes always gives her more courage and motivation to change.

"Why don't you want to tell her?"

The chat continues.

After a long time, Ye Jin gently opened her lips, "I'm afraid she will be disappointed."

"I'm afraid that she will be disappointed, that she won't understand you, and that you won't get the result you want, right?" Ji Shuang said bit by bit, she knew about the relationship between Ye Jin and Yi Zhen. Some of the things she said undoubtedly aggravated Ye Jin's closed mind.

Ye Jin took a deep breath, "Yes."

"Would you mind talking to me about your business?"

"Yeah." Only here with Ji Shuang, Ye Jin can confess without burden. She told Ji Shuang about some things between her and Xia An.

With long-term psychological barriers, Ye Jin has low self-esteem and refuses to actively pursue her emotionally.After experiencing the relationship with Yi Zhen, she decided that she was suitable to live alone.

With this thought in mind, over time, she got used to being alone.

Forget about love and marriage.

It's just that no longer thinking about it doesn't mean that you don't want to, but a passive and helpless compromise when facing reality.

Ye Jin's state, which had been maintained for many years, was broken because of Xia An's appearance. .

Starting from a ridiculous fake marriage, a girl named Xia An began to walk into her life bit by bit.

Her idea of ​​Xia An probably started from that parent-child activity in the kindergarten.It was like a fake show, she really regarded Xia An as her wife, and she thought Xia An should be the same, because Xia An had been holding her hand at that time, calling "wife" one by one naturally and seriously .

So much so that when she got home that night, Ye Jin didn't come out of the scene. She still remembered that when Xia An acted like a baby and asked her to recite it, she carried Xia An back to her bedroom without thinking about it.That day, she was deeply involved in the play.

Ye Jin admitted that Xia An aroused her long suppressed longing for love and marriage.

"Such a wonderful girl, no wonder even you are tempted." Ji Shuang listened to Ye Jin's words, and then reminded her with a smile, "When you talked about her just now, you laughed seven times."

"Have it?"

"Yes." Ji Shuang affirmed, she could tell from Ye Jin's micro-expression when she narrated that Ye Jin was longing for feelings, because of the long-term lack of feelings and self-repression, she would even desire more than ordinary people.

But even so, Ye Jin still hesitates when facing the person he likes.

Ji Shuang naturally understood Ye Jin's hesitation.It's like something that I have been longing for all the time, and finally suddenly appeared by my side, so I naturally want to occupy it, and at the same time, I am afraid of losing it.

And even if it is the same result from nothing at the beginning, the latter is often more difficult to accept.Because the latter will cause a drop, just like holding a person up and then falling, it will hurt more.

Therefore, the hesitation is because the subconscious mind is afraid of this gap.

So focused on results that the most important process is neglected.

"Then do you think two people are together, which is more important, the result or the process?"

Ye Jin hadn't thought about this question before, but after hearing Ji Shuang's question, she thought about it, "The latter."

Ji Shuang was very pleased to get such an answer, "Yes, the process is far more important than the result. Two people come together, get to know each other, and accompany each other is the process, and what really makes you happy is also the process. So, you don't feel that you Should we focus more on the process?"

Ye Jin was thoughtful.

"Are you happy when you're with her?"

Ye Jin thought of their hug in the snow, and Xia An leaned into her arms more than once on the bed.

Also, when Xia An told her that I had someone I liked, he blushed and quietly squeezed her hand, smiling at her...

Ye Jin's expression softened, the corners of her mouth slightly raised, "Happy."

"I can feel it when I hear you talk about her."

Ye Jin smiled lightly again, but it was only fleeting.

"Let's go back to the previous question. You are afraid that after confessing, the other party will not be able to understand and accept it. But have you ever thought about it, you always avoid and conceal, how can you give the other party a chance to understand and accept?" Ji Shuang asked back, After a pause, he continued, "Only sincerity can be exchanged for sincerity, and communication is necessary."

Ye Jin also remembered what Xia An said to herself, two people should be honest when they are together.

"You said you wanted to wait for your situation to improve before giving her an answer. Your willingness to change for her is a good start, and I understand that you don't want to let her down. But change takes time, and you can't just say nothing, Just let her foolishly wait for your results. Have you considered her feelings? It is very hard to like someone but not get a response."

"I understand..." Ye Jin also felt that this was unfair to Xia An, she blindly asked Xia An to give her time, but never gave him a reasonable explanation.

Ye Jin still has worries in her eyes, and Ji Shuang is very clear about the source of her worries.

"Spiritual fit is more important than physical fit. Although you can't do some things now, at least let her know that you are willing to change for her. This is a good response."

Mental fit is more important than physical fit.

Ye Jin looked down at the tea leaves sinking in the bottom of the cup, and murmured, "Should I tell her..."

It seems more like asking yourself.

"If you really like someone, you don't just appreciate the other person's strengths, but also patiently tolerate the other person's shortcomings. If you think this girl is worthy of your love and want to be with her, you should be honest with her and treat her more Trust her and let her know you better, regardless of strengths or weaknesses."

Every time I come to Jishuang's place, Ye Jin gains something more or less, perhaps more clearly.

As a psychiatrist, Ji Shuang can only guide and unravel. The key to the final success or failure lies with the patients themselves. She has taken over many cases, but not all of them are successful.

Just like Ye Jin, Ji Shuang doesn't know when she will be able to help her completely overcome the obstacles in her heart.

She talked a lot to Ye Jin today, maybe Ye Jin agreed with her, but Ji Shuang knew that it would take time for Ye Jin to really do it.

Psychotherapy is a long and tedious process.

Ye Jin talked with Ji Shuang for two full hours. When she got up to leave, Ji Shuang teased her in a relaxed tone, "Don't let her wait too long, are you willing to let her be wronged?"

Ji Shuang was just joking, but when Ye Jin thought of Xia An's disappointed and aggrieved expression, her heart seemed to be pulled.

Before taking two steps, Ye Jin only heard Ji Shuang saying loudly behind her,

"Come on, Mr. Ye!"

Ye Jin turned her head, then smiled, "Got it."

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