i see your calling

Lian Yan had a dream before, it was a dream in winter, dreaming that Shen Pingge was wearing a white suit, he seemed to be standing in the perspective of God, so that he was not sure whether the person beside Shen Pingge was himself or not, But in the dream, he felt happy from the bottom of his heart, but when he woke up, he felt regretful.

Even though he imagined a lifetime, Lian Yan also knew that this might not be realistic, and they couldn't get married, which was a fact, so he kept imagining how Shen Pingge would look like when he got married, but he didn't dare to let Shen Pingge know.

Fu Dan's engagement ceremony is next Sunday, will Shen Pingge go?Maybe in a suit, maybe not.That time Fu Dan left, Shen Pingge didn't speak for a long time, sitting on the sofa, Lian Yan wanted to pour water for him, but Shen Pingge held his hand, turned his head and smiled at him, his voice was very soft: "Hug me."

Lian Yan was different from him before, and when Shen Pingge began to be willing to show his vulnerability and dissatisfaction with him, it was different.

He desperately wanted Shen Pingge to wear a white suit, but compared to this, he would rather Shen Pingge not be so sad, it's okay not to go.

That afternoon Lian Yan hugged him all the time, writing on his palm: I will always be with brother.

"Really?" Shen Pingge asked him.

How can love be fake?

During this period, I have to deal with various things in the school. The results were not checked by Shen Pingge. Shen Yiming checked them earlier than him. Their long silence and stalemate could be easily solved with a phone call. Shen Yiming hadn't talked to them for a long time. After talking, I spent a lot of time going home after the college entrance examination, so I almost didn't face Lian Yan face to face. Lian Yan was used to hiding behind Shen Pingge, so she got used to that kind of silence.

Even though the result was cold, it did dispel some negative emotions. For this result, Shen Pingge didn't seem too surprised.

When passing by the school, I saw a banner in red letters on the campus, saying "Congratulations to Shen Pingge, a student of our school, who has won the first place in the city", and the specific results and provincial rankings were densely written underneath. I looked there for a long time.

She should be happy, but Lian Yan really can't be happy.

From here to Beijing, it takes twelve hours, which is too long.

He thought that the time he spent with Shen Pingge might only be in September, but in fact, June and July did not belong to him. Shen Yiming often discussed with Shen Pingge about filling out volunteers. Lian Yan hid in the room and did not participate their discussion.

Although there was no verbal communication, Shen Yiming still sent text messages to him, the content of the text messages was very simple, about the IELTS TOEFL class, he was asked to take time to take it, with so much free time in the summer vacation, there was always time.Lian Yan stared at the text message, unconsciously biting her tongue, the tip of her tongue was painful and itchy, and he replied "OK".

He thought that Shen Yiming had already forgotten about this matter, maybe he had already made concessions, but now that it was not the case, Shen Yiming still firmly refused to forgive him and insisted on breaking up.

On Sunday, Shen Pingge went to the engagement ceremony. Lian Yan didn't know about it until nine o'clock on Sunday. He just woke up at that time, the alarm clock he set didn't go off, there was silence everywhere, the sun was shining brightly, Lian Yanchi He ran out of the room on his feet, but Shen Pingge was not there.

He sent a message to Shen Pingge: You turned off my alarm clock.

Posted again: You went to attend the engagement.

The engagement ceremony is not as solemn as the wedding ceremony, so he must be able to bring someone there. Lian Yan was originally full of confidence that Shen Pingge would take him there. Feeling aggrieved, she hoped that Shen Pingge would stop saying that, but Shen Pingge quickly replied to him.

Said: Yes.

-Why do not you take me?

-are you sleeping.

- You turned off my alarm clock, you don't want to take me there.

Afterwards, Shen Pingge didn't reply to him again, maybe he was busy, maybe the engagement ceremony just started, in short, anything could be the reason for him to leave, Lian Yan sat on the ground blankly, the phone screen lit up, it was the curious news pushed by the browser , The engagement ceremony took a long time, Shen Pingge replied to him at noon, saying: There is food in the refrigerator, don't eat cold ones, put them in the microwave to heat them up.

Lian Yan didn't reply to him, he didn't understand his emotions, maybe he was uneasy, he was not used to Shen Pingge leaving him, not even for a few hours, he felt tormented, but he just remained motionless until night, Shen Pingge After coming back, Lian Yan heard the sound of the door opening, footsteps came from behind, Shen Pingge squatted halfway beside him, Lian Yan heard his breathing, "How long have you been sitting here."

Lian Yan lowered her head.

"Get up," Shen Pingge stretched out his hand towards him, Lian Yan patted his hand away, resisting his approach, Shen Pingge frowned: "What are you doing?"

Lian Yan turned her head to look at him, and saw the calendar behind him. Shen Yiming used to keep a calendar at home. It is now July [-]th, and Shen Pingge will leave in less than two months. An unprecedented sense of powerlessness, nothing follows him, now even Shen Pingge...he doesn't take him to the engagement ceremony, even if he just asks him to drop him off, he can come back by himself by taking the bus, It's only two dollars.

"Lian Yan," Shen Pingge called him by first and last name, "get up."

This time Lian Yan was still disobedient, Shen Pingge became very strong and hugged him horizontally, Lian Yan struggled to no avail and fell on the soft sofa, there were black stars in front of him, Shen Pingge's shadow Enveloping him, holding his hands on both sides of his body, Lian Yan's unreasonable anger dissipated, and he needed to be hugged tightly.

"Why are you angry?" Shen Pingge lowered his tone, "You have to tell me so that I can understand what you mean."

Lian Yan gestured to him: You lied to me.

He said: You are not mine.

"Then who am I?" Shen Pingge wanted to laugh angrily at him.

Lian Yan wants to say, you don’t belong to anyone, you don’t need to be attached to anything except oxygen, love is not a necessity for him—or, for most people in this world, it cannot be called a necessity, only he He will regard condiments as a necessity, and he is complacent that he has got the best treasure in the world.

This kind of emotion is inexplicable and hard to explain, even Yan was tired all over and didn't want to talk any more, but he reached out and tried to touch his lips, Shen Pingge turned his head, not accepting his kiss, his eyes fell on the tips of his ears, Say, "Sometimes it's hard for me to understand what you're thinking, and it tires me out when you don't say anything."

After saying that, Shen Pingge ignored his trembling, the shadow left him, and the light dripped wet again, but he just gave him another look, turned and left, Lian Yan looked at his back blankly , I realized that he was wearing a white suit, his waist was narrow, his shoulders were broad, and his legs were long. He looked good in a suit. Shen Pingge was wearing that suit and hugged him horizontally, which made Lian Yan contradictoryly happy again. .

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