[Comprehensive] There are always big guys who covet my abilities

Today is April [-]st, the opening day of Likai University. I attach great importance to it, because I will be promoted to the second grade, and maybe I will get rid of this troublesome person, Kirihara Akaya. I hope that God will never put me and Kirihara in the same team. .

I woke up early and finished my morning jog. Looking at me in the mirror in my blue Lihai school uniform, I picked up a red headband and tied my black hair into a high ponytail. I picked up my schoolbag on the chair and went out to start my new grade life.

The cherry blossoms on both sides of the road are already in full bloom, and they are falling down profusely, giving people a sense of poignancy.

"Diring, ringing..." A bicycle bell sounded from behind me. I turned my head and saw Osamu Dazai in a black suit riding a bicycle slowly coming towards me. He rode very slowly and walked crookedly on the bicycle, but Just don't fall.

I put on an attacking posture and looked at him warily. After all, his supernatural power was too dangerous for me, so I asked him in a bad tone: "What are you doing here?"

Dazai waved his hand at me with a smile on his face and said, "There's no need to be so nervous, I don't mean anything to you, and I can't beat you either."

I looked behind him and made sure he was the only one, then retracted my attacking posture: "Then why are you here?"

"I'll introduce you to a super-good job!"

"How good is it?" I squinted at him, and this guy was obviously disturbed and kind.

"Well..." Osamu Dazai thought for a while, "High salary, high salary, five social insurances and one housing fund are guaranteed, and the most important thing is that as long as you go to work there, there will be countless younger brothers who will support you..."

Combined with the previous conversation between Zhongyuan and me on the subway, I seem to understand something... I interrupted him with a black face: "Could you be talking about the port mafia?"

"That's right, think about it." Dazai looked at me with star eyes that you are so smart.

"I'm a member of the Armed Detective Agency." This guy is out of his mind! He just tied me up the other day and now he wants me to join them.

"So in order to show how much I value you, bosom friend sauce, I personally came here to poach the wall," Dazai stretched his neck and leaned in front of me, "It's more profitable to hang out with gangsters in Hong Kong."

"Thank you so much, I'm not short of money." I pushed his face away, turned and walked forward, "And we don't know each other well, please call me Hasegawa."

"Then what do you lack? A boyfriend?... If it's a boyfriend, I can help him as much as I can." Dazai chased after him on a bicycle.

"I don't need anything!" I resisted the urge to hit him and calmed down the anger in my heart. The world is so beautiful that there is no need to get angry because of this Martian.

"Don't be embarrassed... think about it, Zhiyin-chan~"

"I was born as a member of a detective agency and died as a ghost of a detective agency, so just give up!" My attitude was very firm.

"Don't... I won't give up halfway through what I have decided."

This man croaked like a frog, I stopped helplessly and groped in the pocket of my coat, took out a grape-flavored lollipop and handed it to Dazai who was looking at me.

"Give it to me?" Dazai took a handful and opened it into his mouth, looking at me moved, "Zhiyin-chan, you are such a good person."

"Stop croaking like a frog while eating a lollipop," it feels uncomfortable to be sent a good friend card!I turned around and continued walking forward, "And don't randomly send me a good card."

"It's too much to say." Dazai pedaled crookedly to catch up, and gave me a puffy face.

"..." The best way to deal with this person is to ignore him.

"Speaking of Zhiyin sauce, today's weather is fine."

I turned my head and gave him a strange look, why did I suddenly talk about the weather.

"There is no wind, and the sun shines on the water beautifully..."

Listening to Dazai's words, I always feel a little weird. Looking at the sparkling water under the bridge under the sun is really beautiful.

"Bang!"

I turned my head quickly, but only saw the bicycle on the road with its rear wheels spinning, but Dazai was nowhere to be seen. What the hell is this guy doing?

"Bosom friend sauce."

I turned around and looked towards the source of the sound. Dazai was standing on the guardrail by the bridge and looked at me with open arms. Since he was against the light, I couldn't see his expression clearly. I just felt that he looked lonely now.

"What are you doing, come down!" He looked very dangerous now, as if he would leave at any time.

"Farewell." After he finished speaking, he leaned back and fell headfirst. I was startled and ran to the side of the bridge and looked down at the guardrail. The black shadow fell into the water with a "plop", stirring A scattered splash.

I stared anxiously at the surface of the water where the ripples spread, but I didn't see any figure floating up, dammit... This guy either has a hole in his brain or his brain is flooded!Have you ever seen someone jump into a river suddenly without any warning while talking to you?Have you seen it!

At that moment, I even thought that his death could be regarded as a benefit to the people, but he was spurned by me in an instant. What is the difference between me and those mafia who are willing to die.

I couldn't do nothing, so I gritted my teeth and took a few steps to climb onto the guardrail and jumped down. The moment I entered the water, the chill surrounded me and penetrated to the bone marrow.

I opened my eyes and looked for the figure of Osamu Dazai. I looked around and saw Dazai falling in a U-shape in the waves below me. His black hair was floating in all directions under the buoyancy of the water. His eyes were closed and his face was peaceful. As if already dead.

I quickly swam towards him, grabbed his wrist and put it on my shoulder and dragged him upstream. I didn't expect this guy to look thin, but he was actually very heavy. He must have been a pig in his previous life.

"Cough cough...cough" I coughed up the water and dragged him to the bank. I also choked on a few mouthfuls of water when I was in the water, and now I feel dizzy and feel a little short of breath when dragging Osamu Dazai Come.

But I dare not delay, after all, Dazai still doesn't know what's going on, and if he delays for another minute, he will be more dangerous.

After wading to the shore, he staggered and laid him flat on the grass on the bank, patted his face and called him: "Dazai... Dazai?"

Seeing the ghostly Dazai Osamu with his hair sticking to his cheeks and making his face pale, I pressed his abdomen quickly, hoping that he could spit out the water.

After a dozen or so presses, Osamu Dazai coughed twice, and spit out the water accumulated in the abdominal cavity.

I leaned in front of him with joy and asked, "Dazai, what do you think?"

He slowly opened his eyes and looked at me as if he wanted to speak but couldn't speak. He shook his head slightly at me and then closed his eyes.

Watching his consciousness gradually dissipate, he stretched out his hand to touch his face, which was terribly cold, and gritted his teeth: "Osamu Dazai met you, and I was really unlucky for eight lifetimes!"

He opened his mouth and checked his mouth. After confirming that there was no foreign object in his mouth, he unbuttoned his suit jacket, pulled out his tie and threw it aside. Due to his nervousness, he couldn't unbutton his shirt, so he simply grabbed one hand and both hands. Pulling hard to both sides, the white shirt was torn apart with a "stab".

The buttons on the shirt rolled down into the grass and disappeared. The man's strong chest was displayed in front of me, and the eight-pack muscles in his abdomen were smooth, strong and thin.

I folded my hands on his chest and pressed it, and said threats he couldn't hear: "Osamu Dazai, if you die, I will throw you back into the river!"

"Puff...hahaha...cough, cough, cough!" Feeling the vibration of my subordinate's chest, I looked petrified at Dazai who opened his eyes and looked at me playfully.

It seems that he laughed too much and was choked by saliva. He was covering his mouth and coughing non-stop. Is this guy playing tricks on me?He asked in a daze, "Are you okay?"

Who knew that after I finished saying this, Osamu Dazai sat up straight with a carp, grabbed my hand, and his face was full of panic and fear. Coupled with the torn and tattered clothes on his body, it is easy to think of Bad place.

"You...what do you want to do?" Osamu Dazai pointed at me with a sharp voice, and the expression on his face was even more contrived to make me want to vomit "What to do... Come on, someone wants to do something wrong to me, Anyone……"

"Crack...!" It seems...something is broken, it's the three views that I can't get back together after being broken into pieces!

"Touch!" I couldn't bear it and punched Osamu Dazai on the head: "Are you out of your mind! You jumped into the river suddenly, you really thought you were a frog, able to live amphibiously on land and water."

As he spoke, feeling puzzled, he stretched out his hand and gave him a head-knock: "You still got kicked in the head by the donkey!"

"But..." Dazai Osamu looked at me with tears in his hands, although this guy was probably faking it. "My wish is to succeed in suicide. If it weren't for you, I would have accomplished it long ago."

"..." I almost spat out a mouthful of blood, cooperating with me to save someone, did I do something wrong?I looked at this Martian creature named Osamu Dazai in front of me, he was using his supernatural ability to play around with me.

I took a deep breath to calm down my furious mood, gritted my teeth and said to him: "Then please choose a place where there is no one when you commit suicide next time, so as to save others from preventing you from fulfilling your wish...Ah Qiu! "

A gust of wind blows by, and I shiver. I don’t even need to look at me to know that I’m in such a mess. It’s Dazai. This guy knew he was committing suicide, so I wouldn’t jump down… I was almost lost because of his prank. first kiss.

Without the slightest hesitation, Dazai took off his suit jacket and handed it to me, saying, "Put it on, don't catch a cold."

"..." I looked at the wet suit jacket that was still dripping, and my sanity almost collapsed. "Are you sure I won't catch a cold faster after I put it on?"

Dazai looked at me indifferently and took back the coat: "It doesn't matter whether you wear it or not, the important thing is that I have to behave like a gentleman."

"Are you sure you have such a thing as a gentleman?!" The expression on my face could hardly be stretched, I really wanted to show my shark teeth and tear him up as a bastard.

"I take good care of the girls in the Mafia." Dazai grasped the sides of the jacket with both hands and twisted them in different directions, dripping water on the grass. "So consider whether you want to develop in Hong Kong."

Very good... not giving up digging the wall yet, I stood up with a smirk and kicked him in the back. Dazai reached out his hand to block me very quickly and asked, "Why did you do it so suddenly?"

I didn't answer Dazai, kicked his hand away with the other foot, and then rushed towards him, grabbed his shoulders with both hands, turned over and threw him into the river with strength.

Seeing Dazai who struggled twice in the water and emerged to look at me, I rolled my eyes at him in a good mood and said to him, "I wish you a happy suicide."

After I finished speaking, I walked towards the bridge. My schoolbag was still by the guardrail, hoping that no one else had taken it away. It seems that I will not be able to participate in today's opening ceremony. I was quite looking forward to it.

The author has something to say: The heroine's IQ is a scum in front of Dazai's acting skills