The eldest grandson of the Red Chamber

I am Ming Mi, the eldest daughter of my family.It is said that the day when I uttered my voice coincided with the fall of frost, so my father named me Chuchu, which means the first frost in winter.But I couldn’t get my mother’s permission. Frost’s Descent killed all kinds of herbs. My mother heard people say that my fate is hard, so it’s not good to use big characters like "Chu", but my father doesn’t. It’s better to have a hard life. His name is not worthy of his eldest daughter.

According to my mother, my father, who is always easy-going on weekdays, is rarely stubborn, and his stubbornness has always been different from others, so my father's rare stubbornness often wins, and this time is no exception.

Later I learned that my father named me Chuchu, which should have another meaning. I am not only his eldest daughter, but also his first child, the first existence that made him upgrade to his father, the first president It is special, which is fully reflected in the father.

When I was young, my father was not as busy as he was later, he always took me around, and he was willing to take me with him wherever he went. He treated me very pampered, but it was not because my father got married for five years like others said. , then I will be a son.

He is a talented person, but he never asked me to study, and my mother always took care of my homework.According to him, it is a free-range education. When people reach a certain age, they will naturally have a thirst for knowledge. It is not too late to learn these things when they are older.

His mother laughed at him: "You yourself read at the age of three, how do you know that it is better to read at the age of seven?"

The father only said: "I just know it, don't force her, she is a weak child, she must never mention it."

When I was young, I was very curious and wanted to try everything. My father would accompany me to pluck goose feathers and fill them with ink to make brushes. I also went to the old alley craftsmen to learn how to make kites. In front of my father, I seemed to have no idea All reasonable.

I have been away with my parents, and I only returned to Beijing when I was four years old. After arriving in Beijing, my father gradually became busy, and he didn't like to accompany me when he was outside.I left my old friends, and I had no acquaintances at home in Beijing, and I had to learn the rules and etiquette, and I couldn't run around, doing nothing all day long.

So my father let me enroll in a family school. Originally there were only boys in the school. After my father made an exception, many little girls were added.I made my first friend, Sister Ling, who was the daughter of my aunt Tanchun. I heard from my mother that my father was a matchmaker for my aunt and uncle, so he sent Sister Ling to accompany me because he heard me go to school.It's much more interesting in school than outside. It's two completely different kinds of fun. It's just that my husband doesn't like to talk about why, and he doesn't like to talk about it when asked. It's not the same as my father at all.

Uncle Rong is a good friend of my father. He comes to see me from time to time. He is undoubtedly a very attractive person. When I was six years old, I knew that he was a mysterious knight in the Jianghu. It was rumored that he was very powerful in martial arts, his whereabouts were erratic, and his origin was a mystery.

My father said that all people have a strong mentality. Undoubtedly, Uncle Rong, who could walk through snow and fold flowers in my eyes when I was young, was undoubtedly beautiful and moving. I decided to learn art from a teacher.My father obviously trusted Uncle Rong, and after confirming my opinion again and again, he finally helped me convince my mother and grandmother.

I followed Master to Jiangnan, only to know that Master also has a daughter, who failed to inherit Master's talent in martial arts, and her ambition is not here.The master didn't seem to have any regrets when he mentioned this, he just sighed: Your family didn't produce a serious martial arts practitioner, so why did you produce such a seedling.

I don't know what my martial arts talent is, but apart from occasional friends and appointments, Master stayed in Jiangnan for seven years for my peace of mind.

When I was 13 years old, my master called me to him, gave me a sword, and announced that I was a teacher.It was clearly a serious occasion, but he smiled softly and spoke briskly: "What you can learn from a teacher, I can't teach you anymore, go, go to the rivers and lakes to see, 13 years old, just happens to be a little demon girl Disturb the age of the rivers and lakes."

When he talked about this, there was a trace of gentle nostalgia in his eyes. I always thought he was a person with a story. He was about to be 40 years old. In my eyes, he was still as beautiful and moving as I saw when I was young. It is a special case in the world of mortals. He has the courtesy and self-respect of a son of a family, the unrestrained and unrestrained freedom of a knight in the world, and the calmness and transparency bestowed by the years, creating a mysterious and elegant mortal. to heaven.

When I was in my childhood, I meditated in my heart, if I like someone in the future, it will probably be like Master.

I left the misty Jiangnan with a sword in my hand, and did not follow my master's instructions to see the colorful rivers and lakes. I am the daughter of Qing Mingxu, who is in charge of the prison in the Daqi Dynasty, and the justice of the Dali Temple. The rivers and lakes are not my way. I passed by the rivers and lakes, and I still have to go back in the end.

After seven years away from home, and then returning to Shengjing in the north, the home is very different from what I remember.

I don't hate my younger brother who has never met, but I am a little sad, and I have never realized the disadvantages of gender and age for a moment.

They said that even for parents, a bowl of water cannot be completely leveled. Besides, my brother is many years younger than me, so I should let him.

I didn't speak, they didn't know, what I wanted was never a flat bowl of water, what I wanted was the unreasonable preference of my parents, first come, first served, these were all mine.

Grandma said that Nuo'er is a younger brother, and as a sister, you should take care of him more.

But why, I never owed him, why should I take care of him, I think "should" is probably the most unnatural thing in this world.

On the third day after returning home, I was called by my father. He was holding a sword, standing in the bamboo forest in Jingsong Garden, and made a "please" gesture to me.

After dozens of rounds, I knew for the first time that my father, who was always refined and gentle in my impression, also knew martial arts.Suddenly I thought of what my mother had said: When your grandfather was still alive, he said that your father had the style of an ancient gentleman.

In ancient times, a gentleman had a book in one hand and a sword in the other, and he practiced both civil and martial arts.

After all, he is not my opponent. After the defeat, he took the momentum calmly, and then looked at me with a solemn promise like every word: My Chuchu is my first child, and it is the most special, no matter how many more As a younger brother and sister, Chuchu will always be my first treasure, no one else can compare.

I returned to the capital after seven years. Even if my master never underestimated my education in poetry, books and etiquette, he is an elegant person.But I have a specialization in art. Compared with the girls in the scholarly family in Beijing, my poetry homework is obviously insufficient.

I was brought by my father to study, whether it was classics and history books, or court news, I never shy away from it, and taught me a few words hand in hand.He passed on his family and country ideas, ambitions and talents to me through various forms of guidance.

I am his first child, no matter the eldest daughter or the eldest son, I am just a child, regardless of gender, I can inherit everything he has, and it is a matter of course for father to son.

When I was 15 years old, my father suddenly asked me what I thought of Empress Changsun and Empress Meng of the former dynasty.I looked at my father's solemn inquiry and thought about the situation in the palace. I thought I probably understood what he meant. I thought about it for a while and shook my head.Since my father came to ask me, he has the ability to turn around.

He smiled, with relief and relief.He patted my head and said: Finally, I didn't teach this scene for nothing.

Not long after this incident, my mother wanted to propose marriage to me, and quietly asked me what I meant. I refused decisively: "Mom, I don't know what I want in the future, but at least for now, I can't imagine getting married and having children."

Another year later, the new emperor ascended the throne, amnesty the world, and opened Enke.The third uncle who just failed in the examination was very happy, and I accompanied my grandmother to send him into the examination room.

When I came back, I said to my father, "Father, I heard that if you pass the civil examination and military examination, you can be hired by the local clean-up department?"

Since I sent my third uncle to the Gongyuan, I went back to the library to send out classics and history books. Except for the female officials in the inner court, the only thing women can do is the local officials or official clerks. year results.

I figured my father would understand what I meant, and in fact he did.

Hearing this, his expression was very strange, it seemed to be happy or sad, he was silent for a long time before he stroked my hair and sighed: My son was born at the wrong time, even if he was born 20 years later, it is not the current situation.

I know what he means. It is a long way for a woman to enter the court. It may last her father's life. Even if he favorably let his eldest daughter enter the court, it is not impossible.But obviously not now.

I smiled and told him: Father, since ancient times, all major changes can only be achieved by one generation, and it takes several generations to pass on the torch to create a new situation.

No matter what, there is always a forerunner, maybe this is the meaning of my beginning.

The master said that if you hear the Tao in the morning, you can die in the evening.

My father said that although there are tens of millions of people, I will go.

Now that I have found my own way, I should have the consciousness of martyrdom. I am fortunate to be a son and a disciple. There is an untimely life, and it is obviously the best time.

The author has something to say:

Well, so it was Ming Mi who finally changed her name to Lin Mi, Cheng Gu Su Lin Shi, and started her story.