paranoia

Song Wanzhou was stunned, all his emotions and answers were reduced to two words, "Xiaojing..."

Song Jing laughed at himself, put away his cowardly expression, got up from Song Wanzhou, fell silent for a moment, then threw the backup key he was holding tightly on Song Wanzhou, and did not turn back when he opened the door away.

Song Wanzhou lay flat on the bed, his chest was still warm from Song Jing's remains, and there were tears on his clothes.Recalling the loneliness in Song Jing's eyes just now, and his slightly trembling lips when he spoke, and his index finger rubbing back and forth on the soaked cloth, his chaotic head became heavier and he couldn't understand anything.

Song Jing's moody attitude towards him and his eagerness to push himself away from home were like a huge whirlpool, pulling Song Wanzhou into it constantly, and the sea water covered his eyes, making him unable to see clearly. In his heart, this little brother hates himself or something.

Song Jing's vague concern for him is true, as is the boredom in his eyes.

His head hurts, and the sleeping pills are gone. Thinking of Song Jing who might be waiting outside the door, he is not in a good mood for the time being. He doesn't know how to face him, let alone how to answer his words. .

Is it just as he said, go abroad, stay away from this home, stay away from him?

Song Wanzhou pressed the tingling temple and kept pressing it, trying to sort out the messy ball of wool.

Finally he put down his hands, sighed, sat on the bed with his head bowed and thought for a long time, even his breathing slowed down, and only the sound of the clock ticking was left in the room.

Song Wanzhou turned on the light in the room, stood in front of the floor-to-ceiling mirror, looked at the sad face in the mirror, took out a rubber band from his pocket and tied Ling's loose hair behind him, rubbed his frowning brows hard, and changed his face. A suit of clothes finally walked out of the room.

He thought he and Song Jing needed to talk.

There seems to be some misunderstanding between him and this younger brother who grew up together and is closer than his own brother. As a result, a window has been erected between them invisibly. The Song Jing he can see is not the real Song Jing. Similarly, in Song Jing's eyes, his appearance also changed.

The rest of the family had already fallen asleep, Song Wanzhou didn't turn on the lights, and didn't take out his mobile phone. He fumbled his way to the outside of Song Jing's room, but the door was closed but unlocked.

He tapped a few times but got no response, so he called out again in a low voice: "Xiaojing."

"let's talk."

"If you don't answer, I'll assume you agree."

After waiting patiently for a few minutes, Song Jing still didn't make any sound, so Song Wanzhou pushed open the door when he agreed.

The whole room was pitch black, the curtains were tightly drawn, leaving only a gap, and the faint moonlight shone through, making it impossible to see where Song Jing was at the moment. Song Wanzhou stood at the door, pursing his dry lips lightly, Say softly, "Mind if I come in?"

From the corner of the room came Song Jing's voice, "Is there something wrong?" He didn't say he didn't mind or didn't mind, his voice returned to the coldness of the past, his words were full of biting coldness, resisting like a hedgehog's protective shell With everyone approaching.

However, Song Wanzhou is a gust of wind, a wind that can't feel the thorns, and penetrates into Song Jing's shell through the gap, blowing his inner body.

"Small scene."

Song Wanzhou walked slowly close to the wall, came to the small balcony in front of the window, and saw the outline of his younger brother curled up at the moment, with his arms around his shrinking calf, leaning his back against the corner of the wall, burying his face in his knees, It was a fragile look he hadn't seen in a long time.

He sat down next to Song Jing, reached out his hand and wanted to rub him in his arms to comfort him like he did when he was a child, and stopped when he was about to touch Song Jing, put his somewhat cramped hand on his thigh, and gently pulled the corner of his mouth, slightly Dotingly said: "Xiao Jing, are you still angry with your brother?"

Song Jing was like a statue, unmoved by Song Wanzhou's softening, only his heavy breathing showed that he was still asleep at the moment.

"It doesn't matter if you don't answer, brother is wrong this time, brother apologizes to you, brother shouldn't hide everything from you."

Song Wanzhou paused for a moment, and then said, "Xiao Jing, haven't you always wanted to know why I was adopted by my parents?"

Hearing him talk about adoption, Song Jing raised his head and saw his brother sitting under the curtain with his hands propped on the table, the moonlight reflected on his upturned face, tears flickered at the corners of his eyes, slender And the thick eyelashes swayed slightly, bringing down a string of crystal clear teardrops.

Song Wanzhou tilted his head, with a bitter smile on the corner of his mouth, and even his voice became hoarse: "Xiaojing, my brother used to have a complete family, as well as parents, and my grandma who loves me the most."

----------------

Song Wanzhou's real name was Yan Mingyuan, he had long forgotten it was Guan Zhiwen who told him.

When he was young, only those close to him would call him Yang Yang, but his closest parents had a car accident when he was five years old, leaving him with the white-haired man to send the black-haired man's grandmother away.

He used to be a very lively kid, but since his parents passed away, he has become much quieter. No matter who teases him, he can’t laugh, nor will he ask for toys, let alone food. nice drink.

After he stopped arguing for his parents, others thought he was a child with a big forgetfulness, and he had come out of the pain.

In fact, every night when his grandma fell asleep, he would climb out of bed from her arms, quietly come to the master bedroom alone, and lightly say to the empty room: "Mom and Dad, I miss you a little bit today. "

Tell him what he misses every day, and he will feel much better in his heart.

The eve of dawn is the long night.

However, he hasn't finished thinking about his parents. His only remaining relative was sent to the hospital because of overwork and a heart attack.

He couldn't leave her. When Wen Shu was just hospitalized, he wanted to sleep with her in the hospital, but in the end he was entrusted by his grandmother to live in Han Junjing's house.

Wen Shu promised him that when she got better, she would go home with him.

Although he missed his grandma very much, he still lived in Han Junjing's house obediently.The two of them went to school together every morning, and Han Junjing came to pick him up to the hospital after school in the afternoon, and waited for Han Junjing's grandma to come to deliver Wen Shu's meals, and then picked them up back home.

Secretly thinking about his parents, he only told Han Junjing, not his grandma.As long as parents' names were mentioned, his grandma would cry. The doctor said that grandma should not be too emotional, so Eryang only told grandma the good news, hoping that Wen Shu's illness would recover soon and take him home.

He lived very well in Han Junjing's house. The whole family treated him very well and did not treat him as an outsider. Han Junjing even asked his grandmother if he could let him be his biological brother.Grandma Li will prepare delicious food for him, and Han Junjing's parents will also buy toys for him and take him out to play.

But Han Junjing's parents are not his own after all.Every time he saw their happy family, he was jealous and couldn't help asking Han Junjing if he could lend him his parents.

In Song Wanzhou's fragmented memories, Han Junjing, who was only two years older than him, was good at taking care of others since he was a child. After learning about his family's situation, he cared more about him. Everything was piled up in front of him, just to make him happy.

Facing Han Junjing's kindness, he couldn't laugh at all.

Wen Shu stayed in the hospital for a long time, and he still didn't recover until Song Wanzhou's fifth birthday.

He was forced to stay in the hospital that day, and wanted to spend his birthday with his grandma. Han Junjing's parents bought them a small cake and then left with Han Junjing who was thinking about it.

Song Wanzhou remembered that he told his grandmother many things that night, most of which were about getting along with Han Junjing and life in the kindergarten class.

tell her,

A child in the kindergarten class gave him candy.

Teachers like him very much.

How many little red flowers have I got.

...

Wen Shu was very happy that day, lying flat on the hospital bed, asked the doctor to take off the breathing mask, and carried Song Wanzhou to the bed.Although his complexion is not good and his lips are dark and purple all the time, he is smiling, his sunken eye sockets are glistening with tears, and his thin palms are patting Yang Yang's back, praising him again and again. He is a big boy, a well-behaved and sensible big boy.

Wen Shu ate cake with him, and asked him to make a birthday wish, but didn't let him say it.

"Yangyang must keep his birthday wish in his heart, don't tell others, or it won't work."

In her memory, she hadn't spoken much since Wen Shu fell ill, but because it was his birthday, the two grandparents chatted very late that night.

Wen Shu was still talking until Song Wanzhou started to doze off.

He lay in his grandma's arms and had a good sleep, dreaming of his parents.

However, when he got up the next day, his grandma couldn't open her eyes again.

Song Wanzhou never made a birthday wish when he grew up, but all his life he remembered his birthday wish when he was five years old. It was very simple, but it didn't come true.

He hopes that he can grow up quickly and be a little man who can stand upright and protect his sick grandma.

Obviously, he has already thought about how big a house he will buy for his grandma when he grows up, how many trees will be planted at the door, how many dogs will be raised at home, and he has even considered that he must put a grandfather chair for his grandma at the door of the house. Because Wen Shu liked to lie on it and listen to him play the piano.

Obviously he didn't tell anyone his wish, but his grandma left.

Only later did he know why Wen Shu kept saying sorry on his birthday.

Because of the people who agreed to live a good life, now he is the only one left.

He never blamed his grandma for abandoning him, because he knew that his grandma just missed his parents more, so he went to find them first.

Wen Shu was buried with his parents. The funeral was only held in his family a few months ago. At the end of October, the faces that appeared at his parents' funeral last time appeared at his grandma's funeral again, including the man who hated him very much.

It was still Xiao Huiming who came to pick him up to the cemetery, but after his grandmother passed away, he was very calm and never cried again.

His uncle Xiao brought him in front of that man. Only then did he know that his mother had a younger brother, that is, he also had an uncle.

His uncle Wang He had never been to his house, but his grandmother became his guardian after his death.

Although the neighbor's grandma Li was very opposed to Wang He taking him away, saying that they could adopt him, but in the end he followed Wang He to far away Beijing. That was the first time he went out by plane.

Song Wanzhou has always relied on the word "family" since he was a child. He feels that as long as there are relatives together, it is a family.So even if he only met this strange uncle Wang He twice, he was willing to follow him.

Song Wanzhou didn't quite remember whether Han Junjing cried before leaving, but the two of them hugged each other so tightly that Grandma Li had to pull Han Junjing away before he left.

They made an agreement that no matter where he went, he would come back to find Han Junjing in the future.

But it seems that Han Junjing came to him first in the end.