Battle of the Rhine

Michael picked up the phone and dialed a number.It was foggy in front of his eyes, and he seemed to press a few times casually.Immediately connected there. "Hello." It was German, a young girl's voice, "Who are you?"

"I—I am—" Michael manipulated his tongue mechanically. This is almost the simplest sentence in German, "Who am I?" Everyone who learns German should start with this sentence, "I am Michael ? Fiennes."

"Mike!" the girl screamed immediately. "Is that really you, Mike? Where have you been?"

"I'm back in the United States." Michael said, his German was actually quite fluent. "The reason for work... transfer..."

Strangely, he hasn't thought about the complex and troublesome case, subjunctive mood in German for a long time, but he can still use them proficiently.That girl was definitely Charlie, but the voice didn't quite resemble her.Maybe the phone line is out of order.Michael put the earpiece to his ear, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Charlie said, "but Cal isn't fine...he's never been fine, you know."

do i knowMichael fell into a moment of bewilderment.Who is Carl?He thought hard, ah, it's Xia Li's brother.He was a blond guy with blue eyes who could play the piano.Michael held the receiver, and Charlie's high-pitched voice scraped against his eardrums like a scraper.

"...after you left, he was depressed for a long time. He was an introvert...I thought he was going to be fine, cheer up, after all he was going to get married, wasn't he?...We lived together For Christmas, he bought a big Christmas tree. He said, 'Charlie, I'm turning 30. It's important to be 30, and I figured it out.' I said, 'What did you figure out?' He Smiled and kissed me on the cheek and said, 'You'll understand when the time comes.'”

"After New Years, he recovered slowly. That is, he stopped going to church again. He participated in some activities, played football...he stopped playing the piano, bought an accordion...and then...I collected A letter," Charlie's voice became erratic, the signal, the goddamn signal, it's a whole ocean from America to Europe, it's too far, shit, why is it so far? "It was an afternoon when I opened the letterbox and got the letter. It was from Carl. God, Mike, I opened the envelope and the first thing I said was... 'Dear Charlie, this is Carl. I'm sorry , but I am not ready to live. The bell of death has sounded, the flames of hell are waiting for me'... I ran like crazy to his house, the house was clean everywhere, and he was not there. He's not at work either, a co-worker told me he quit a week ago..."

"...Ollie found him for me, and none of us could find him." Crying broke Charlie's narrative, "I thought, maybe Karl just got tired of life in Germany and moved elsewhere. France is quite Well, wouldn't he? He'd be safer and happier in France. He could speak French... But, they found him!" She whimpered loudly, "They found him, Mike, on the Rhine . . . …he died."

Michael grabbed the microphone and maintained this movement.He felt numb all over, dizzy, and tinnitus. "...Three years, Mike, I finally found Carl." The girl said sadly, "It was some surveying engineers who found him. They were going to build a bridge there. The old bridge... was blown up... at first , they thought he was a...remains from the war...because he was wearing a military badge..."

"According to his will, we...cremated him, and scattered his ashes...into the Rhine River..." Xia Li's voice gradually sank, "The police deduced that Karl committed suicide...he first dug a... grave, and then With a pistol... It's horrible, Mike, it's horrible, he's so young... He doesn't deserve it..."

Michael saw a whirling light, and was so dizzy that he could barely stand, someone was calling his name, and he struggled to keep his attention, trying to hear what Charlie was saying.

"You...know...brother...why..."

"I don't know," Michael said tremblingly.

"Soldier's syndrome, I guess. He was in the war..."

The noise got louder and louder, and Michael had to hug the receiver and shouted hoarsely, "Did he mention me in...?"

"No." Xia Li's voice suddenly became very clear: "Mike, what is the relationship between you and Karl...?"

Michael was silent, white light surrounded him, he dropped the receiver and opened his eyes.

"You almost scared the hell out of us," said Big Girl, arms crossed, unshaven. "You've passed out! All day," said Peter, who knew you'd end badly at the factory. Nine out of ten people who work in that kind of place are either crazy or sick."

Michael's head was buzzing, as if someone had stuffed a honeycomb into his ear, "I fell asleep?"

"It's fainting! It's not sleeping—God, can you still understand English?"

"Understand... I still know you, you are... a big girl."

"Go away, you old country dog!"

Not a big deal, and Michael didn't pass out "all day". "At least it's not a big problem right now," he chatted with the doctor, "It's just that we need to work less overtime and sleep more..."

Oliver rubbed his hands together uneasily, "Sorry bro, I—"

"I had a nightmare," Michael said.The hospital was in chaos like a wholesale market, noisier than the workshop, "...has he been arrested?"

"Who? Who's been arrested?" Oliver thought for a moment. "Oh, 'King'?—no, why? Did he break the law? I don't think so."

"Then how do you know he's that?" Michael didn't even want to mention that word, gay, didn't he go on a date with that woman named Lehman?Three years have passed, and he hasn't even gotten married... Damn it! "He told you?"

"He won't talk to me." Oliver bowed his head. "He hates me, his dogs can tell. How do I know? Because I have eyes, Mike. He has a man with him, France Dude. That guy is taking care of him, and he is quite careful. They are... like that, sticky, I can't tell, anyway, you will understand after reading it..."

He scratched his hair, "I said, you, Mike, you came back without saying hello, could it be... He didn't pester you, did he?"

After sending off his comrades, Michael lay on a narrow hospital bed and had another dream.This time there was no noise in the dream, and he was on the platform of the Munich train station, with large luggage piled up at his feet.

"You have to take care of yourself." He shook hands.Those hands have fair skin, slender fingers, and light red joints. "Remember to eat breakfast, don't drink coffee on an empty stomach. Eat dinner too... Go out more often and play football. I'll wipe the ball and put it away." It's under the piano... Remember to light the fireplace, I've chopped firewood for you, or you'll be cold... Stop reading those books, read the Bible! Pray to God sincerely..."

"Okay," said the owner of those hands, "I remember."

"I'm relieved..." Michael breathed a sigh of relief, "I forgot to tell you last time. I have a lot to say to you, but I am determined not to call you or write to you. I have to leave you, stay away from you. What should I do? I can't think of a way... Will you hate me?"

"will not."

"Then will you forget me?"

"Probably."

"You will forget me very quickly, I'm sure. People forget very quickly. You see, I can't remember what you look like now..." Michael said, his eyes were hot, "Please forgive me, I Didn't mean to. I'm a terrible bastard and it's all because of the war! Without the war you wouldn't have met me...without the war I wouldn't have had the chance to buy you a drink...Why are your hands so cold?" he Rubbing those hands vigorously, "What's wrong with you, after so long, your hands are still as cold as ice."

"Because I'm dead," said the owner of the hand, "fool, dead hands are so cold."

In the spring of 1956, Michael resigned for a second time.When moving out of the office, Laura came running with tears in her eyes, "Hey, Fiennes, where are you going?"

"Not sure yet," Michael said holding a large cardboard box, "I'm still looking for a job."

"Are you crazy? Well done, why did you resign?"

"I want to go to Europe and find someone."

"Stop talking nonsense, go to Europe? Looking for someone? Looking for your blond, tall, long-legged college student who can play the piano?"

Michael nodded, "Yes, I'll go find him."

"You're such a fucking faux pas," Laura snapped. "Isn't it good here? Can't Detroit find a blond college student to sleep with?"

"You'll understand later." Michael freed up a hand and patted Laura on the shoulder, "Goodbye, chick."

In July 1956, Michael's feet once again set foot on German soil.It had been four years since he last left.The summer sun had made him a little dizzy, and his blood pressure might have fluctuated dangerously from normal again after the long walk.But Michael had no time to pay attention to his blood pressure. He arrived in Munich at the fastest speed and rushed to the street he was most familiar with.

In the afternoon, there were not many people on the street.The street garden was still there, with pigeons and huge gray birds idly pecking at the grass seeds in the cracks in the bricks.In front of Quincy's red brick house, a garden of roses bloomed quietly.