Who dares to touch my son in the Red Chamber

Recently, Situzheng felt that he had begun to doubt life. He also knew it. With the speed of his writing, let alone writing the filial piety scriptures a hundred times in ten days, even if he was given another ten days, he would not be able to finish it.

As for writing poems, this one is not much better. Even if he is asked to recite poems praising the empress, he can't recite two poems, so he can only ask for foreign help.

The first thing that came to mind was his two cubs. In the end, Jia She was the one who had a headache from reading. When he heard that he wanted to help his father write a poem praising his queen grandma, he asked for leave the next day without saying a word. It is said that I ate too much, but the pain is in the head?

Xiao Jiu had no place to hide, but since he was only five years old and knew nothing, no matter how frantic Situ Zheng was, he couldn't make things difficult for him.

Then, Situ Zheng found Lin Xi, and when he heard the poem, he still praised the empress of the dynasty. Lin Xi shrugged, spread his hands, and said simply: "I can't do it~"

Even though she has a younger brother who will be Tanhualang in the future, and a talented niece who is more intelligent than Bigan in the future, but she herself is completely clueless about poetry!

There was no other way, Situ Zheng could only ask Lin Hai, whom he was afraid of, for help. Lin Hai lived up to his expectations and helped him write seven or eight poems of good quality, but no matter how many, he really couldn't write them for a while.

These poems are all short stories, which are a taste of scholars. It is normal to write one or two excellent works impromptu, but it is estimated that ordinary people will not be able to write a hundred poems on the same topic.

Lin Hai, who was pushed into a hurry by Situ Zheng, said angrily: "Writing poems with inspiration, how can you be so difficult as you are? You can't let me write a bunch of misty things to fool people, can you?"

Situzheng was in a hurry, so he dug out the doggerel poems he had written and said, "What's the matter, the more clouds and mountains and mists surround me, the better, anyway, it's my mother who punished me, and it's over after I deal with it, she doesn't know my level."

Lin Haibin took his poem and said, "Then you just keep writing and you're done. The empress is elegant, shrewd and capable, and you start with a loving mother and don't ask for quality limericks. You just write... .Puff, cough, cough..."

Seeing the content of the poem in his hand, Lin Hai, who is as calm as Lin Hai, can't take it anymore. What the hell is this?

The queen mother's eyes are round and big,

Two ears hang left and right,

Eat all directions with one big mouth,

The nose is in the center.

Situzheng snatched back her "masterpiece" as quickly as possible, and when she saw that it was not stained, she let out a sigh of relief and complained: "Be careful, these are the few things I wrote all night without sleep." poem."

Lin Hai pointed to his poem and asked: "You didn't sleep all night, and you came up with such a poem? This isn't even a doggerel, right? You still need to light a lamp to boil oil?"

As soon as Situzheng heard it, Lin Hai knew that it would be effortless for Lin Hai to write a hundred poems of this level, so he nodded excitedly and said, "Yes, this is fine, and you don't need such a high-end one."

When Lin Hai heard this, he shook his head like a rattle and said, "No, I can't come like this, you have to come by yourself, you are not afraid of shame, but I can't, if my father knows that I wrote such a great poem , I guess even my mother can't save me."

Situ Zheng said anxiously: "Your father and your mother are still investigating in Hongshawadi. How can they have time to care about what poems you wrote? Besides, let's not pass it on to the outside world. Who knows that you wrote it?"

Lin Hai still shook his head and said, "No, I definitely can't ruin my reputation because of a few poems. If people find out about it in the future, I won't be able to gain a foothold among scholars."

No matter how hard Situ Zheng tries, Lin Hai is determined not to let go, but after all, he grew up playing with him since he was a child, so Lin Hai can only say softly: "Well, write slowly first, and I'll find inspiration, and then I'll help you. .”

Situ Zheng patted himself on the head and said, "Isn't looking for inspiration just a state?"

Lin Hai also didn't say it clearly, but generally speaking, it should be about the same, so he nodded and said: "You should be right, but I have never found that state, so the poems I wrote don't have that aura , it cannot become a masterpiece handed down from generation to generation.”

Situ Zheng slapped his thigh and said, "Brother Hai, although I don't know how to write poetry, I still have some insights into the inspiration you said."

Lin Hai didn't trust him very much, but he also knew that Situ Zheng always had crooked ideas, and sometimes he could hit the right ones, so he let him hold his hand and talk nonsense.

Situ Zheng cleared his throat and said flickeringly, "Have you heard of Li Baidou's Hundred Poems on Wine?"

Lin Hai nodded and said, "It's natural."

Situzheng continued: "What this means is that as long as Li Bai drinks too much, he will reach his excitement point. At this time, he will have inspiration, so he can write those poems that will last forever."

With some bad premonition, Lin Hai asked vigilantly, "And then?"

Seeing that he was still not enlightened, Situ Zheng could only continue: "Also, when will Su Shi's water melody song head Mingyue come out? Have you heard of it?"

Lin Haidao: "How come I haven't heard of such a famous poem?"

Situ Zheng hated iron for being weak and said: "It is clearly marked here: Bingchen Mid-Autumn Festival, drinking happily, getting drunk, writing this article, and pregnant with Ziyou. It means that he is also drunk, so he wrote it. Such a word to miss his brother."

Lin Hai asked: "So?"

Situ Zheng said flickeringly: "So, many poems can only be written in a daze when drunk. This is why many great poets like to drink."

"Brother Hai, the reason why you haven't triggered your own inspiration until now is probably because you haven't drunk alcohol. As long as you drink enough to be a little confused, you don't even know who you are. At this time, no one else Send the pen and ink to your hands, perhaps, your masterpiece handed down from generation to generation will appear the next day."

Lin Hai half-believed what he said, but he was still only an eight-year-old boy, his curiosity finally defeated his reason, and he also wanted to taste real wine.

Then don't worry about whether you can write some masterpieces in the future, at least you can verify whether you have the physique of Li Bai, the poet fairy, and whether you can bring yourself to that state after drinking alcohol.

So, after the two brats researched, they decided to let Lin Hai drink first, and then, Situ Zheng helped control the time. When Lin Hai didn't know who he was, he arranged the pen and rice paper, and then imitated Li Baidou's poems articles.

There are people watching in the palace, especially here with Situ Zheng. It is absolutely impossible for him to order wine directly, but he knows that there is a wine cellar in his mother's harem.

Empress Zhou is a person who knows how to be interesting. For example, she collects the snow water from the plum blossoms in the yard in winter, and when she is free, collects the dewdrops on the leaves before dawn, and saves them for tea.

Occasionally, when the mood comes, she will cook a few small dishes by herself. In addition, she will brew some seasonal plum wine and low-alcohol wine such as Lihua Bai every year.

Probably, this is also the reason why Emperor Jin Ming still loves and respects her as always in front of the beauties who look like flowers and bones, and as he grows older, he wants to live with her like an ordinary couple.

Situ Zheng doesn't care why Emperor Jinming loves Empress Chongzhou so much. It's better to have loving parents than to be at odds.

What Situ Zheng had to do was to quietly dig out the wine that Queen Zhou had buried in the yard. Of course, if he went to the imperial dining room to steal the wine, it would be easy with his ability.

However, the wine in the imperial dining room is all high-quality tribute wine. Situ Zheng is afraid that the alcohol content of the wine is too high, and Lin Hai has never drunk alcohol, and he doesn't know the exact amount of alcohol. If he drinks badly, Lin Xi can kill him .

If not, he would have just taken out a bottle of Wuliangye, Moutai, etc. that Linxi collected in the space and given it to Lin Hai to drink.

When he was a dog, he drank wine a few times. However, he was not very good at drinking, and he poured it after only two sips. In addition, the dog's tongue was very sensitive, so he didn't like the spicy liquor very much.

But he still likes those sweet fruit wines, so this has also trained him, as long as he is far away, he can smell which wine is sweet and which wine is bitter and spicy.

Based on his own experience, Situ Zheng quickly chose the target of the crime. The wine there must be sweet and fragrant, and Lin Hai will definitely like it.

For Lin Hai's Hundred Poems on Wine Fighting, Situ Zheng specially asked Yuan Bao to go to the imperial dining room to order a lot of appetizers, such as roast chicken, lamb chops with sauce, and pickled cucumbers. There are more than ten dishes in total. .

This is not a meal, Situzheng ordered so much to eat, but still sent it directly to Lin Hai's study, and naturally someone informed the queen.

Because she didn't know that her wine had been murdered, Queen Zhou said indifferently: "Ce'er and the others are busy all day long, so how can they help him write poems?"

"Xiao Jiu and She'er were taken by Xiao Qi. They don't know anything about poetry and songs. Xi'er certainly doesn't bother to think about it. Xiao Qi is only Brother Hai who can catch laborers. Naturally, he has to bribe him."

After finishing speaking, he waved his hand to let people go down, and then motioned to Omiya's daughter behind him to continue beating her legs.

Queen Zhou guessed the root of the matter, that is, Situ Zheng bribed and tricked Lin Hai to help him write poems, but Queen Zhou never expected that her son would have so many crooked thoughts.

However, Situ Zheng was shooting himself in the foot. When Queen Zhou got the news, she couldn't laugh or cry.

Situ Zheng guessed it right. Lin Hai really doesn't drink well, and I don't know if it's because of his young age. Anyway, this guy just drinks too much in one bowl.

Lin Hai has never drank alcohol, but he has read about those chivalrous men in the books. He pours a bowl full, and then he says to do it, and the thieves will do it, and they will be praised as great heroes, great heroes.

In addition, a few days ago, he also saw the prince toasting with his own eyes. He raised his neck and did it all, and then there were cheers all around him. That feeling, man!

So, Lin Hai directly poured it up for himself, and before Situ Zheng could tell him to let him get used to it slowly, he just said a word and straightened his neck and downed a bowl of wine.

Then, Situzheng saw Lin Hai looking at him with hazy eyes, and Situzheng's heart skipped a beat, but after thinking about it, he immediately asked cautiously, "Brother Hai, who are you?"

Lin Hai shook his head and said, "Don't move, why are you wobbling? Tell me, am I a thief? Do I look like the kind of knight-errant who walks the rivers and lakes with a sword in the book?"

Realizing that Lin Hai really drank too much, Situ Zheng rolled his eyes and hurriedly dragged him to the desk to let Lin Hai write poems.

Lin Hai asked in a daze: "What are you doing? I want to drink, I just..."

Situ Zheng hurriedly coaxed: "You help me finish writing the poem, and you can drink whatever you want."

Lin Hai was a little dazed, but even if he drank too much, his brain was still working. He said directly, "That's a poem you wrote as a punishment. You can't let me do it all for you."

Then for some reason, the soul of being a good teacher revived, and taught Situ Zheng: "The way of learning, you must not have the slightest slack, and you must not have a fluke mentality. The reason why you can't is because you have a good foundation." It is not solid, so now, I will help you lay the foundation again."

As soon as Situ Zheng heard it, he immediately said: "Brother Hai, let's write the poem first, and then we'll talk about the basics after we're done, I'm still waiting for the assignment, or if you continue to drink, I'll think about it myself first? "

Lin Hai shook his head and said, "Don't worry about drinking. I'll drink casually when you know how to write poetry. However, you can't write poetry if you don't have a solid foundation. So, I'll start teaching you now."

Situ Zheng wanted to cry but listened to the knowledge he had been fooled by. Lin Hai was in a good mood because he drank too much, so he not only said it himself, but also asked Situ Zheng to repeat it.

When the queen received the news, what she saw was the poor Xiaoqi who was forced to learn from others.

The author has something to say: Thank you for the little angel who voted for me or irrigated the nutrient solution~

Thanks to the little angel who cast [Mine]: 1 for Seven Nights;

Thanks to the little angel who irrigated [nutrient solution]:

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Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!