quail

the next day.

Li Bai woke up with a start, and found himself lying on the bed, while Yang Jian was on the balcony outside the master bedroom, separated by a layer of glass and a vague gauze curtain, where he could see.

Yang Jian changed his clothes. Li Bai felt that the brick-red turtleneck sweater was not dense enough when he bought it. Now he is standing by the window, the glass in front of him is opened, leaving only a window net, like It's like not needing to keep warm.The sky was clear and quiet, without even a cloud. Under the high contrast, the piece of red seemed to jump into the piece of blue tiles. The wind blew in, crawled through the door, and bumped into the radiator with its smell of soot. It was also half cold Half hot.

Li Bai leaned against the head of the bed, ordered Nanjing for himself, and watched Yang Jian's back quietly.Some short-lived memories rustled up his face, filling his empty brain like smashing stones.

It was only a few minutes before twelve noon.

What is going on now?

He fell asleep last night.After sleeping for so long, keeping the door and cell phone open, Yang Jian didn't leave.Why did he fall asleep——he couldn't stop crying, and Yang Jian sat across from the coffee table, looked at him deeply, and told him that it's not suitable for us to talk now.

So go to bed.Less than half of the food on the big table was eaten, and Li Bai threw it all into a plastic bag. Before going to bed, he wrapped Yang Jian's hands around the bedside pillar, ignoring the doomed futility, but the man still didn't care about anything. Did not say.It was his own insomnia until midnight, kneeling beside the bed to untie the rope.

Yang Jian seemed to have fallen asleep at that time.

what are you thinking about?Li Bai looked at the light spot on Bianhong's shoulder, the outline was soft, like amber.

When Yang Jian was really angry, he was very quiet.

This is also the truth that Li Bai has long understood.

If he hadn't seen Luo Pingan three days ago, things might not have turned out like this.

Li Bai stubbed out the cigarette butt, thinking like this for countless times.It can be said that it was a sudden disaster, when the business opened early in the morning, the man suddenly sneaked into his shop, wanting to experience the celebrity treatment and asking for a discounted price for old acquaintances.Li Bai didn't refuse, and received it with a smile. Anyway, it was two hours away from the time agreed with the reservation customer, so what tricks can be figured out in a round inch.

Luo Pingan is a chatterbox, looking at the mirror and babbling endlessly, saying that he has changed a lot in the past few years, not only has he become famous, but he is no longer the kind of spooky ghost who can only be sick and glaring, saying that he has finally matured Quite a lot, you have to chat with him.Li Bai responded one way or another. This person is not high in IQ, and he has no EQ. He has always found it annoying, but at least he is Yang Jian's friend since he was a child. When we chatted, we naturally talked about Yang Jian.

"Don't believe me, your brother is also my half-matchmaker!" Mysteriously, Luo Ping'an poked his neck and motioned Li Bai to get closer, but Li Bai had to remove the clipper to avoid shaving him bald. , and seemed a little impatient to play tricks on this, "Matchmaker? You are dreaming."

"Hey, if you don't believe me, ask your brother, there are all the witnesses and evidences—" Luo Ping'an sneered, "I'm getting married, and I came here to get a haircut just to have a new look. The bride met in Wenling, at the youth hostel. Someone bullied her, and your brother and I held down those grandchildren and beat them up, and the girl secretly agreed!"

Li Bai was stunned: "Wenling? Zhejiang?"

"Five years younger than me, from Lianyungang, my family is in the water production business, but I went to school in Beijing," Luo Ping'an closed his eyes comfortably, "I take her here and she can adapt, our goal in the future It is to sell her seafood to the capital! The wedding will be held this month, and there is an invitation card in the bag at Dadong Roast Duck. I will give you one later. Remember to write your name on it. Come on!"

"..." Li Bai's fingers touched the pusher's head, and there was a "buzz".

Luo Ping'an was still talking to himself: "Hey, talking nonsense for a long time, maybe you won't come if your brother is my best man? It would be a bit unreasonable for the two brothers to follow only one person!"

"When did you go to Wenling?" Li Bai asked.

"Huh? Just... around the end of last year."

"The end of [-]?" Li Bai stared at Luo Ping'an's eyes in the mirror, "December [-], December [-], December [-], [-], right?"

"It should be." Luo Pingan looked up at him with strange eyes, "Who remembers this clearly."

I remember clearly.Li Bai thought.I remember that day I went home from the set, but Yang Jian was not there, and he didn’t say hello. On the tenth night, Yang Jian opened the door of the house at [-] o’clock in the evening, dusty, and fell asleep after taking a shower.

I didn't ask.Li Bai thought again.

The Spring Festival was not too early or too late that year, and he took me to the temple fair. We played ice carts on the lake in the Summer Palace, and we rode in the same car. He was behind me, so he could hug me hard, but our car still overturned. Once, I was crushed by a stone, and my teeth hit the ice. The ice smelled like earth, and the earth tasted sweet.

His phone screen was shattered.

My teeth are strong and still neat.

But Yang Jian, how could he do this? After the Spring Festival, he disbanded his cram school. There were four classes, more than 200 students, and a yearly income of millions. It seemed that he didn’t even hesitate to open new ones Spring courses.He went to Beijing No. 985211 Middle School to apply for a job and succeeded. When he used to do it by himself, he took the ordinary class he had taken as a make-up class to [-]. Every time he took the exam, he scored higher in physics. This happened every year. It took only two or three years to recruit such a few students from Xicheng, and all the people in Beijing came to find him. The teachers on campus had already heard of him.He stayed in the second year of high school for half a year, and then directly followed the third year of high school.

The projection equipment and experimental equipment I bought for the cram school before, I wanted to treat them as surprises, but I couldn't get them out.

I didn't ask either.

It's not that he doesn't care or is not curious. To be precise, for a period of time, Li Bai dreamed every day, and the dream was always about what Yang Jian did after he disappeared inexplicably.The reason why he didn't ask is also very simple, it's just because he asked too much before, accumulated experience told him that standing in front of Yang Jian and waiting for an answer that won't come out is too tormented, and asking questions to other unimportant people, It's easy.

Like now.

"What are you doing in Wenling?" Li Bai asked casually.

"Your brother really didn't tell you? I was still wondering...why didn't he take you with me?" Luo Ping'an frowned, "It's just that he went to check on his sister. It's just dawn, and she was standing alone. On the beach, maybe I want to spend a while with my sister."

After shaving his sideburns, Li Bai stared at the piece of gray ashes, and began to cut the broken hair underneath.He was a little speechless.

Fortunately, Luo Ping'an never needed others to sing along, "He didn't make a cemetery, but scattered Yuqiu's ashes into the sea. The town is called Shitang, and it is said that it is the place where the first dawn light shines in all of China. Did I mention it to you? I only found out later that when he came out of the mountains a few years ago, I asked him for dinner, and he said that he would go over to have a look. When there is a major turning point in life, you have to tell your relatives, Your brother is quite traditional in this regard."

"I was called last year. Actually, I really didn't expect Yang Jian to be so alone...call me? The state is very wrong, worse than when he just returned to Beijing. Should he be too calm or a dark tide? Like It was like a battle, what a huge blow he had experienced, I asked him and he didn't say anything, I felt that if he was allowed to go there by himself, he would have to jump into the sea, and looking for me for the first time, maybe he was asking for help?" Luo Ping An's brows were completely frowned, and the creases were deeply piled up, "Besides, I also liked Yuqiu before. If I didn't catch up with him, there was a relationship. I haven't seen it for so many years, so I asked for leave from my work unit and went with him. .”

Li Bai tried hard to recall, but there was only one answer.Yang Jian has been to Wenling at least twice, but he was not there before each departure.

If it was for help, Yang Jian was not looking for him.

He didn't know what Yang Jian looked like at that time.

All he knew was that when he returned to his own eyes, Yang Jian had already returned to his original state.

"It turned out that he behaved quite normally after he went there," Luo Ping'an continued, "Looked at the sea, ate seafood, and we stayed at the youth hostel for the last night. A group of people drew lots in the living room and lost. The one who wants to be slaughtered, Yang Jian drew a bad lottery, and the punishment item is to search the wallet."

The hair on the back of his head was messy. Li Bai held his breath and shaved it lightly.

"Then I flipped through it. I didn't have a lot of money, and I didn't have a lot of cards. This person really doesn't reveal his wealth. He stuffed two photos in the most inconspicuous mezzanine. One is the two of you standing in the Weiming Lake of Peking University. On the side, under the willow tree... There is still a work permit around the neck, it seems to be a theater festival? I help carry the props, and you help with the makeup, right? They are still two children," Luo Pingan paused, and he saw Li Bai two Bloodshot eyes, "there is another one, it's his sister. She lay on the table and smiled with her head tilted. I remember that there was a red agate chain in my hand that was very eye-catching. The whole person was very beautiful and fashionable. There was one who was blind He opened his mouth and asked if he was his girlfriend."

"Yang Jian smiled at him, no, it's my sister, that's what he said, just send me a WeChat, and I'll be your brother-in-law, okay? A large group of them are all in the same group, all drunk and booing, saying It's a pity that Pan'er Liang Tiaoshun didn't have a full body photo for Yuqiu, so Yang Jian stopped talking. As a result, the group of grandchildren couldn't give up, and then they went after my wife again, and wanted to punish the little girl for taking off her clothes and holding her hand. After touching it, Yang Jian suddenly stood up, without swearing at anyone, he just lifted that person up and kicked the corner of the wall."

"I just said that there are a lot of friends on the opposite side, right? If you are outnumbered, of course I will help my brother. Just now I thought this person has been counseled for so many years," Luo Ping'an laughed twice, and slapped his thigh, "Good guy, In high school, it was like bean sprouts. It was not uncommon for a dozen or so vocational high school bastards at the school gate. Who were we afraid of when we were together? Taught the group of hooligans a lesson, but was dragged to the police station that night. I would have been able to come back in two days. But how could it be a blessing in disguise, I would not have known my daughter-in-law without this nonsense."

"It's also evil. It was originally Yang Jian who came out as a hero to save the beauty. He is also handsome. He didn't get fat like me. Why did he fall in love with me? I can only say that your brother fights too fiercely and crazy dog, that kind of love to death I'm in a daze of love and death, and I scared people." Luo Ping'an was delighted, and began to beam with joy, "I have to thank your brother for being so fierce. I met my right girl, and the girl was destined to let me go. Her heartbroken bad guy, you don't have any more rivals in love. All of this is fate, it's fate!"

Li Bai didn't say another word, he arranged Luo Ping'an's hairstyle, and received 300 yuan and an invitation.The money was kept, but the invitation was thrown away, and his dislike for Luo Ping'an had risen again. Mixed with inexplicable jealousy and hatred, it was really impossible to send sincere blessings.He temporarily booked two extremely expensive air tickets, sent screenshots to Yang and said, "Let's go there together", and it was already two o'clock in the afternoon after he had done the hairstyle for the customer who made the appointment. He returned home and squatted on the sofa first class.

I got an answer in the early three o'clock: I just finished the preparatory class meeting, and I will invigilate the exam immediately, and I will talk about it when I go home.

Li Bai asked: When will you go home?

Yang Jianhui: Not sure.

Li Bai cooked, packed his things, and stayed until dark. He didn't wait for anyone, so he didn't seem to need to ask any more. The takeoff time on the screenshot was clear, and Yang Jian made it clear that he didn't plan to join him on the trip.So Li Bai reheated the food, connected several pots with hot water, soaked the dishes to keep warm, left the two packed suitcases at home, and took a taxi to the airport alone.There is no time to check in, and it seems that there is no need to bring a change of clothes, a camera mask, etc. He only wears a big coat, and the pockets of the coat are the mobile phone and ID that must be carried.

And the keys.

After flying to Taizhou and taking a black car for more than three hours, Li Bai arrived in Shitang Town before dawn.I only found out about the existence of this sea yesterday, and now I am rushing to come here. It seems that I can't say "finally came here".

The weather was bad, and there was no sunrise for people to enjoy. Standing on the rolling low hills beside the coastline, he could only see the vague shadows of fishing boats in the thick fog.

He ran to the beach again, took off his shoes and socks, and rolled up his trousers.When the tide is low in winter...the sea water is like magma when you step on it.

Is it the frayed cut on the foot with salt water?

I know it's not.

Don't even look at what's in the water.

But when Yang Jian stands here, will he be happy?

Then why did Yang Jian come back and ask for trouble?

Why, I would rather call that vulgar, boring, long-overdue abandoned friend.

But keep his mouth shut?

Because he is the cause of all this?

He did bad things, that's why Yang Yuqiu died, and that's why Yang Jian suffered until now?

He is not dependable, not trustworthy.

Everyone has so many old questions, always asking themselves, but can't find the answer.It is precisely because of being unable to answer that it is getting older and asking more and more questions, almost becoming a habit.

Li Bai realized that he was about to walk into the sea, and the water was up to his knees, so he changed his direction again, crossed the beach along the trace of the low tide, and came to the boundary full of reefs.

My feet hurt so much, I fell on my back, and my pants were soaked.

He called Yang Jian tremblingly: "Brother, are you listening?"

"Let's start right away, you say."

What a coincidence, at 56:[-], the speed of life and death of your teacher.Li Bai looked down at the dial.

"Did you come home last night?" he asked.

"There are problems with the monthly exam papers, and they are in a hurry to reprint. This kind of thing is not good for a female teacher to do." Yang Jian hurriedly said, and the preparation bell rang on his side, "Where are you?"

"Go to class quickly."

"You went to Wenling by yourself?"

"I do not have."

"……Feel sorry."

"What, go to class quickly." Li Bai hung up the phone.

Yang Jian called twice that day, but Li Bai was not ready, fearing that he would do something that he would regret for the rest of his life, so he didn't answer.He sent a text message saying that he was fine, don't worry, Yang Jian really didn't look for him anymore.At the end of the day, Li Bai rode his bicycle almost all over the town. He imagined Yang Jian's appearance when he stood everywhere, and recalled many old things about Yang Jian's life in front of him—not just at the end of [-]. Once, that person came here silently. In fact, Yang Jian often left Beijing alone, sometimes long and sometimes short, so short that Li Bai didn't notice it. Folded the ticket, only to know that this person left again.

That time I went to Guizhou.

The rest of the time, Li Bai didn't even know where he was going, when he was leaving, and when he was coming back. He didn't force him, and he didn't dare to follow them. It was annoying. He understood that he just wanted to know that Yang Jian had gone. where.

Of course I asked, but the answer I got was always perfunctory, a hug, or a sentence of "I'm sleepy", and later it simply turned into a sentence like "It has nothing to do with you".

This is also why most of the time quarrels happen.

When did this state end?Yang Jian settled down and stopped running around.The timeline matches up.It started when I went to work in No. [-] Middle School.It started when I came back from Wenling and saw my sister again.

It's been a year.

But the quarrel does not seem to have been put an end to it.

Li Bai found a youth hostel to stay for the night. This hotel was built next to Binhai Road. Standing on the roof, he could see the dark water below the cliff and hear the crashing waves.A bright moon is bright and clean.But it was too cold, so Li Bai went back downstairs and watched a group of college students playing Werewolf in the living room. At night, he slept on the upper bunk. Before dawn, he got up again to catch the bus to Taizhou, and fell off the bed halfway down. down.

Several roommates were so disturbed that they grunted a few times, and then snored loudly.

My whole body hurts, especially my back. It feels like being grabbed and beaten.Li Baimo thought whether I was so stupid or unlucky, got up with difficulty, walked around in circles, made a few simple movements, and after confirming that no bones were broken, he left here.

On December [-]th, Li Bai went back to the store to check the situation. When he returned home at night, he opened the door for himself with a key, but saw Yang Jian sitting at the dining table, and he hadn't finished eating the dishes he had left behind. Jian didn't make the staple food, so he ate the plate of carrot fried meat slowly with a glass of cold water.

It's Friday, no wonder.Friday finally arrived.Li Bai stepped on his boots and took off his coat. He didn't feel like he had gone far away.

Besides, even if it happens, there is no need to report to Yang Jian, as long as it is comfortable not to interfere with each other, isn't this the tacit understanding they have always had?It was uncomfortable at first, but then he worked hard to do it.Just like before opening the store, he could just pick up his bags and leave whenever he wanted to go, he was never asked, he said it on his own initiative, it seemed unnecessary—just like Yang Jian went to Guizhou, and there was no need for him to go to other places explain to him.

That's such a hassle.

What a heavy burden.

Talking too much will be embarrassing and destroy the balance that the two have worked so hard to maintain.

is this correct?

However, Yang Jian put down his chopsticks, leaned back on the chair and looked at him: "You are gone."

Li Bai supported the edge of the wall and looked back quietly.

He suddenly wondered whether that kind of balance had never existed, and it had always been his imagination.Are he and Yang Jian the kind of people who like to deceive themselves?

Yang Jian said again: "Luo Ping'an has already told me."

"When?"

"This afternoon."

"Oh, I was on the plane at that time." Li Bai lowered his eyelashes and smiled a little shyly, "Brother, do you also think Luo Ping'an is a big-mouthed idiot? Why do you still want to be his best man? Leave him alone." .”

"..." Yang Jian said cautiously, "You should wait for me to come back."

"But you won't come back." Li Bai walked towards the kitchen with his head down, "I couldn't wait to take a look, so I went."

Rummaging in the drawer next to the cupboard, he took out a bag of instant soybean milk and a bag of black sesame paste, opened them and poured them into the same bowl.Mixing these two things together is Yang Jian's favorite flavor. He even bought some for Yang Jian to take to the office. I don't know if that person has ever drank it.

"I want to burn some paper, but there is no place to sell it, only those who sell small fireworks and fairy sticks, which is not suitable." He slowly poured hot water and stirred it with an iron spoon, "I can only tell my sister I'm sorry. I said it. I said it several times."

"You don't need to say it." Yang Jian's voice came from the restaurant.

"Really?" Li Bai's hands froze.

"I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to go." There was a corridor and a toilet, and the voice couldn't be heard clearly.

"Really." Li Bai said again.Because I went, even if my sister could see it, she would not be happy.Because it is a very pure and clean place in your heart. To some extent, it can give you a little comfort when you are "very wrong". I went to it and stepped on it.Is it this way.

He looked at his trembling hands and took out a medicine bottle from the drawer just now.The place at home is small, so I can only stuff the medicine box and these brewed dry goods together.

Besides stomach medicine, the most common thing at home is sleeping pills.

The more Li Bai thought about it, the more he felt that Yang Jian was too gentle, speaking so euphemistically, and caring about his own feelings.But it was this kind of tenderness that made Li Bai so sad that he didn't know what to do.

I don't know anything, I can't see anything, I don't say much... I just wait obediently for him to come back, or just stay at home less, distance creates beauty, and a little farewell is better than a newlywed - this is what Yang Jian thinks The state you want?

It is convenient for Yang Jian to go out to work, digest pain, and explore the world.

Li Bai did try, tried very hard, but now it seems that he can't go on.Yang Jian seemed to be getting farther and farther away from him under repeated refusals, and now he thought that Yang Jian would step out of that house again and be a little further away from himself, and his heart would throb.

Really don't do that...whatever you have, whether you are happy or sad, let me be with you.

Li Bai saw his hands unscrew the medicine bottle, pour out three tablets, crush them with the bottle cap, and sprinkle them into the bowl of sugar water.In the end, it was still not stirred evenly enough, and it was too easy to agglomerate when mixed, but Yang Jian told him that those agglomerates were also delicious.

Holding the small bowl, Li Bai walked through the corridor and stood back in front of the dining table.He pushed the glass of cold water aside and put the small bowl in its place.

"Then I won't go in the future, I won't go again," the spoon handle was stuffed into Yang Jian's palm, he leaned over, and gently pressed it against Yang Jian's lips, opening and closing every single word there, "Brother , I will do whatever you say, if you didn’t attend class at the time and asked me to jump into the sea, I would also jump.”

As he said that, he closed his eyes, and he could feel Yang Jian opened his mouth, his thin lips were soft, and his breath was moist and hot, "I saw a very suitable cliff, next to the road..." I could also feel that hand finally Open it and hold the spoon.

"I'll do whatever you say." Muttering and repeating, Li Bai hooked Yang Jian's neck and sat on his lap.He wants to see Yang Jian eat up that bowl, before that, he will never stand up or leave.No.wrong.wrong again!

He never leaves.forever.