quail

I saw Yang Jian again when the dusk was getting darker in Wan'an Cemetery on South Xiangshan Road.That day happened to be October No. 12, Yang Yuqiu's first seven days.Li Bai heard the news from Luo Ping'an three days ago. Yang Yuqiu stayed in the hospital for one night after the rescue failed, and was sent to the funeral parlor by Yang Jian the next day. The ashes could be picked up in three working days, but it took seven days until Now.

On the phone, Luo Ping'an spoke in general terms and was very impatient. After all, Li Bai persistently dialed more than ten times before he would answer.The general meaning is that Yang Jian didn't tell anyone the day Yang Yuqiu was sent away, and it took two days for the news to reach him.He thought about it for a long time before asking, but Yang Jian only replied "It's already burned", and then their friends didn't know the news.In the next few days, Yang Jian seemed to be busy all the time, and he basically couldn't get in touch with anyone who wanted to express condolences.

Now the person has turned into ashes, and after several days of storage, Yang Jian seemed to be almost busy at last, and remembered to take her back.Those who are a little bit emotional and want to remember, only said that they should come here on the first day of Qiyi, and say goodbye authentically.

At that time, Luo Ping'an also reminded Li Bai that you should not go, because if you go, you will be embarrassing your brother. After a few words, Li Bai quarreled with him. In order to hang up, it was because he mishandled the newly bought discount phone and ended the call by pressing it somewhere.

Li Bai didn't dial back.In the next two days, he went to work on time and took his medicine on time.There are several kinds stuffed in the bag, and those little pills rattle when he walks, there are Weitai capsules, there are pain relievers and anti-inflammatory medicines, and there are also prescription medicines prescribed for him by the doctor Yang Jian introduced.It was at the end of September... At that time Li Bai felt that he couldn't live anymore. He squatted on the patient's armchair with a teacup in his arms and cried uncontrollably. His emotions were as endless as his tears. He fell into the mouth of the cup and cried until he couldn't speak before drinking it. The cup of tea tasted very weak.

But he didn't know what he said that day. Maybe he just described the three wedding dresses he saw countless times. The doctor was very gentle and seemed to be objective, saying that he was too emotional and easily tortured by his own emotions.As if to make him "hard-hearted", the doctor prescribed a bottle of medicine for him. After taking it, Li Bai could indeed gain immediate calm, as if all his turbulent emotions were put into a black bag and controlled. I can feel it, but I can't see what it is.He no longer wants to cry, he always feels drowsy, and even his mind becomes dull, and he feels muddled every day. Is this a side effect?At least it's better than trying to stab yourself when you pick up the scissors at work.

However, the medicine also caused him stomach pains, and Li Bai couldn't help suspecting that this was similar to how someone would shave his back with red shackles when he complained of a headache. It was a pain transfer therapy, plus psychological hints.This is the most worrying side effect. Stomach painkillers don’t work, but the stomach medicine painkillers drunk with alcohol seem to have some initial effect. He doesn’t have to cover his stomach and curl up at the foot of the bed, just sit on the ground can fall asleep.Sometimes when he wakes up after being drunk, Li Bai will come to the judgment that he has been cured. He doesn’t feel hopeless, and he doesn’t want to do those appalling things. , very beautiful and completely normal.

This is also the reason why he had the courage to go to Yang Jian. Yang Jian couldn't accept him who was sick, so what if he cured the disease?October [-]th...to the early morning of October [-]th.

People say that time has no beginning and no end, but his time seems to end on that day.

The medicine didn't work.Is it because of the wine?Or is it too effective?At that time, watching Yang Yuqiu's crying and Yang Jian's silence, Li Bai became the protagonist of the farce, and his heart was full of sharp knives. He finally spit it out, but the feeling he got was barren.But there is no resentment, panic, or compassion. Speaking of my embarrassment, it's like watching a fabricated movie.

The black cloth bag was still covered in front of his eyes.

According to the script, he felt that he should clap his hands happily.When it couldn't be filmed, Yang Jian said "Get out", and he really got out.

So, until now, is the cloth still there?

Should be gone.

Joy, anger, sorrow, joy... Yang Yuqiu's death was a knife that cut through the black cloth.What is the collapse of the sky, probably the few minutes after hanging up the phone.Countless thoughts entangled Li Bai, countless spearheads pointed to an answer, and countless fears filled his pores.As soon as he closed his eyes, he could see the full house of distinguished guests and snow-white cheongsams, and Yang Jian's frozen face.The pills can no longer be suppressed, and he doesn't know what to do to end it. He bought a mobile phone and reissued a SIM card and searched through all the phone books he could find. He hid his backpack behind the rock, and finally, he was able to inquire about Yang Jian again.

It's the day we can meet again.October [-]th, the first seven, six o'clock in the afternoon... the approaching time seemed to be counting down to his own death, Li Bai made up his mind not to drink anymore, he didn't want to appear there smelling of alcohol.

He did not touch a drop for the next two days.

He knew that it took time to sober up, and this kind of high fever needed more than just a hangover.

And the feeling of watching himself being stripped from An Tian's drowsiness was particularly terrifying.

Finally he woke up.He walked out of the garden alone, walked through layers of stairs, and crossed the inscriptions from the Ming and Qing Dynasties to [-]-this is said to be the largest cemetery for ten thousand people in Haidian.

Come to the depths of the cemetery, in front of the dwarf pine forest, in front of the funeral parlor with gray tiles and gray walls.

I didn't run into a few people on the way just now, and entered the hall of the funeral parlor, the bleak energy still didn't dissipate.This is also normal. Memorial services are usually held during the day, and people who want to pick up boxes to pay respects to relatives don’t like to pick the time when the sun is almost gone.In the silence, the most ear-catching group of voices was in the corridor on the left. Li Bai followed the voice and walked slowly. Sure enough, there were a group of people standing at an open door.He hid behind the edge of the wall and watched from a distance. At a distance of more than ten meters, he couldn't hear what they were whispering, but he could see the sign hanging on the wall in black and white, which read "Cumberland Storage Room." "Among the nine people under the card... Li Bai recognized Luo Ping'an and Zhao Weizong, Zhao Chutai also came, and she grew taller, wearing a pair of black overalls, hanging next to his brother Head pouted, looking uncomfortable.

Surrounded in the middle is of course Yang Jian.

He was facing Li Bai sideways, holding an ebony box, which blocked him too much, and Li Bai could only roughly see him clearly through the gaps between the interlaced figures.Yang Jian wore a pure black round-neck sweater, which was quite thin, with no decoration at all, and it became a little worn out after a long time.Li Bai remembers it very clearly. He used to say that it was like autumn clothes. When he got paid to buy a lot of new clothes, he told Yang Jian not to wear it again. Yang Jian never listened to it. Looking at his sideburns, he smiled and asked, is it really ugly?

He also said, what should I do if I show emotion.

At this moment, Yang Jian is still dressed in that way, the cuffs are loosely rolled up to the elbows, the black jeans underneath are washed white in front of the thighs, the shoes are also black, the watch is also black, and the hair, eyebrows and eyes are jet-black. , Under the cold light, his exposed collarbone and wrist bones were pale and thin, and his body had no color at all.

Even the red lips and white teeth when smiling are gone - Yang Jian's lips are bloodless, and he is not smiling.He was listening to Luo Ping'an, and turned his head slightly. Li Bai hurriedly hid behind the wall, and only after a few seconds did he reveal one eye again. He longed to become small enough to become a speck of dust on the ground, but Yang Jian also Only one eye was exposed.

On the other side, a square piece of gauze was pasted on his left eye, which he couldn't see just now.

Li Bai only felt that his head was being pierced by the wire, and his nails dug into the cracks of the tiles on the wall.

After all, there was not even a memorial hall, and the group of people only chatted for a few minutes, but Li Bai felt several times that Yang Jian seemed to have seen him as the lonely gaze passed in front of him.Then the friends left one after another, patted Yang Jian on the shoulder before leaving, said a few words softly, sighed twice, and walked towards the exit scatteredly.Li Bai put on his hood and stood in the shadow outside the light. Fortunately, no one turned his head when passing by. One, two... six people left.

Hearing the movement stopped, Li Bai stood back to the edge of the wall just now. Li Bai saw that Zhao Weizong was left at the end. Yang Jian leaned against the wall on the opposite side, speechless, neither looked at each other, just in a daze.

A few minutes later, there was a human voice over there.It was Zhao Weizong who spoke first, and Li Bai faintly heard three words, "I'm sorry, but Yang Jian laughed all of a sudden, turned his head, held the urn with one hand, put the other arm on Zhao Weizong's shoulder and said something, with a gesture Relaxed like small talk, giving the illusion that what's going on these days is just a nightmare.Li Bai couldn't see his expression, but Zhao Weizong interrupted for a while, as if he was arguing with him. Suddenly, the face that was always smiling sweetly crumpled into a ball. Rubbed his eyelids, as if he had become the one who needed comfort instead.

By the way, why is he alone?That "Lin Daiyu" who always sticks to him, sat next to him at the wedding two days ago, why is it gone now?

Li Bai felt very strange, Zhao Weizong was crying.It was Zhao Weizong who was crying.

And Yang Jian is so calm and calm, making it hard to see depression.

Fortunately, the man himself realized that this was inappropriate, quickly rectified his emotions, and led his younger sister to leave. Yang Jian walked side by side with them, passed Li Bai in the dark, crossed the bright hall, and stopped in front of the door. , and finally just waved his hand.

"Goodbye." His voice came faintly.

The setting sun is imprisoned in the pine forest, framed by the low window into the painting, Yang Jian returns indoors, sits down on one end of the bench by the window, puts the urn on his lap, and nods his head to watch quietly.

He was the only one in the hall, and Li Bai didn't dare to move after chasing to the entrance of the corridor. He kept looking at him, seeing him in a silhouette, even his half-length forehead hair was still.

Li Bai's breathing was about to stop, and the unexplained chill in the funeral parlor crawled all over his body.

I don't know how long it has passed, but occasionally a staff member passed by, and the twilight followed the round sunset to the horizon, and gathered into a deep red, reflecting the color of the sky.It was the height of dusk, Li Bai still couldn't take his eyes off, and had a flash, he suspected that the person he was looking at had fallen asleep.

It was also at this second that Yang Jian said coldly: "Have you seen enough?"

Li Bai couldn't believe his ears.

Yang Jian still lowered his eyes, looking straight at the urn, and said again: "Come out."

Li Bai couldn't help but believe it, even though Yang Jian didn't look at him at all, even though every joint of his was stiff, it seemed like he was about to cramp when he took a step.He moved in front of Yang Jian so weirdly and slowly, once he stopped, he didn't know what to do again.

"Sit." Yang Jian raised his face and looked at him with his right eye.

Li Bai silently sat on the other end of the bench, three seats away from him, and then saw a piece of golden and red afterglow cast on the ground, which was incompatible with the pale floor tiles around him.

"We met again," Yang Jian smiled, "This cannot be avoided."

"...I'll come and see my sister." Li Bai stared at the mark of the setting sun.

Yang Jian put the box by his side, pushed it directly and slid on the metal chair surface, the wood bumped rattlingly, Li Bai was caught off guard by it hitting his thigh, and almost jumped up, after all, it didn't, he desperately Suppressing the undulation, he turned his face to look at Yang Jian, tremblingly, his eyes swept across the wooden box carved into a palace shape, and saw Yang Yuqiu's black and white smile on the small disc in the center.

she's in there.

Her smile is still moving.

Li Bai couldn't look away, let alone raised his hand to touch the round frame and touch the lacquered wood.As if being haunted, his eye sockets were filled with tears little by little, and he couldn't hold them anymore. The tears fell down innocently, he bit his lips tightly, and even his shoulders were trembling.

When Yang Jian saw him like this, he took out a white net bag for carrying watermelon from his bag, wrapped the urn around it and tied it tightly to prevent it from being spilled into the bag if the lid was not secure.He zipped up the backpack, and walked away with one shoulder on his back. The heavy box hit his back, and he seemed to have completely forgotten about Li Bai's existence.

"...Yang Jian!" Li Bai jumped up from the chair, but he could only call out this one title in the end.

Can't say "brother".

He never thought about it himself.

Yang Jian turned his head and looked sideways at him, there was no emotion or expression in that single eye.It's like asking: haven't you seen enough?

Li Bai quickly chased after him, "What's wrong with your eyes?"

"The welding slag from the electric welding burst out." Yang Jian pushed the door, walked straight across the driveway, and walked onto the stone path among the pine trees.

Li Bai's fingers curled up and he pinched the seam of his trousers tightly. He still made a "hiss" unconsciously, as if he had finally come to his senses. Without the black cloth bag, his eyes had never been so clear, but his heart throbbed with pain. He slammed it twice and hit his chest hard, "Can you still see it?"

"Temporarily blind." Yang Jian said in a nonchalant tone.Li Bai's questioning has been stuck for too long, they have passed through the dense shadow of the pine forest, and the sky is indeed getting darker and darker. In this overwhelming gloom, Yang Jian's steps are flat and fast, as if only this one His eyes are enough for him to see clearly the road ahead full of steps, walking among the high and low tombstones.

"What did you weld?" Li Bai was about to panic when he left, "Don't you have to wear goggles!"

Yang Jian walked ahead silently, as if he didn't hear him at all.

"...I'm sorry." Li Bai lowered his head deeply, "I shouldn't be talking so loudly here."

Outside the rows of stone tablets in front, a couple of men and women were burning paper near the steps. The woman was crying sadly. The two walked by.Li Bai thought, there must be a ghost behind him, his whole body was bright red from the fire of the paper money, his nostrils were round and his eyes were bleeding, and his stinky tongue was stretched out, otherwise Yang Jian would not turn his head for a look.

"I heard from Luo Ping'an that you are moving," but I heard Yang Jian ask, "Have you moved?"

"I," Li Bai came back to his senses immediately, "I don't have much stuff, I've packed almost everything, and I can leave anytime."

"Okay," Yang Jian said, "You can throw the key away after you're done moving. You don't need to give it to me. I'll change the lock next week and give the key to Li Li and ask her to return it to her uncle."

Li Bai was stunned, Yang Jian didn't care why he left - well, it was obvious, and he didn't care where he went, just telling him that he didn't have to go back after he left.

Li Bai desperately suppressed the thought of mentioning the word "Li Li", how could they still meet?How can we still meet?No matter how surprised or hurt he didn't want to question, he didn't want to be aggressive, "I'm planning to go to the production team in the future." Even if Yang Jian lacked interest, he felt that he should tell him, "We don't work in fixed stores all over the country."

Yang Jian gave a "hmm", but still didn't look back at him.

"Your eyes... will they heal completely?" Li Bai asked tentatively.

"Maybe you need to wear glasses," Yang Jian replied, "We'll be at the exit soon, if you have nothing to do, go back first."

"See more doctors, don't go to a small hospital."

Yang Jian stopped talking again.

The green belt at the exit is indeed close in front of us, and the hustle and bustle outside the cemetery is also close. All of this is still shrouded in the huge shadow of Xiangshan Mountain. For a moment of peace, Li Bai wet his fingers and continued to find nothing to say: "Can I Take the sofa away?"

"That's what you bought."

"But I have no place to put it." Li Bai took a wrong step forward and put his shoulders on Yang Jian's shoulders. "I'm not going to rent a house anymore. Anyway, I can't live here for a few days if I run around."

Yang Jian just nodded.

"...Where are you going to live? Isn't it in the science and technology building? Where are you living these days?"

Yang Jian suddenly turned his head and looked at Li Bai unequally, but his single gaze was extremely focused: "Throw away your sofa."

He even brought up a thin smile, which was bright, beautiful, and gentle. This smile made people wonder if he was serious: "Three sentences asked me in succession, like an interrogation, don't do this in the future, okay?"

That's what he said.

"Hold, I'm sorry." Li Bai panicked.

Why is there a future?

Indeed, Yang Jian wasn't still thinking about what he would be like in the future, he stopped laughing after he finished speaking, and completely ignored Li Bai, just picked up his phone and walked very slowly.When he walked to the place where there were two ginkgo trees away from the door, the bell rang. It was Yang Jian. He just stood there and connected it. Layers of stone tablets were stacked behind him, black and white, and the wind was blowing in his sweater. Agitated, messed up his hair, and blew a few wisps of blood from the sun onto his cheeks.

It is still a rich painting.

Why.There was not a trace of the pain of loss in him.What Yang Jian said and did makes people feel that he never owned it at all, so it can't be said that he lost it.Why is he so calm and orderly.

So good.

While feeling lucky, I was also wrapped up in panic, mixed together, it was blank.Li Bai thought, you don't care, it doesn't mean I'm pardoned.His breath became cloudy, erratic and stuffy, and he was confused by Yang Jian again.

Yang Jian heard a few words from the other side quietly, and said: "Yes, I just got it." He glanced at his watch slowly, "I will deliver it at about eight o'clock."

"Understood, she can't be in an ordinary cemetery, only you can help her—" He lowered his head, with an embarrassed smile, "I was too ignorant before, and it made her very troubled, she asked you before Take care of me? Ugh, it's a shame to hear that now.

"People will grow up," choked up sobs, and was covered up lightly, "I owe her too much, and I will fuck you in the future."

"It should have been like this earlier, yes, it should have been like this earlier," Yang Jian took off a green and yellow ginkgo leaf from his hair, spread it out in the palm of his hand, squinted his eyes, and then Li Bai saw his face It was cold and arrogant, but the voice was still warm and humble, "Okay, then see you at eight o'clock, I'll wait for you."

After hanging up, Yang Jian put his pockets in his pocket and walked out of the archway at the gate, and stepped onto the concrete parking lot outside the door. Only then did Li Bai remember what he had thought before he came here, and quickened his pace to follow his rhythm, "It's my fault, "Before parting, he said the difficult words in a low voice, "That day... I did it that day, it was too impulsive and rubbish, I saw you exchanging rings and my head became hot, I couldn't control myself and felt dizzy, I don't know what happened at the time What are you thinking..."

There is nothing new in it, it is obviously true, but the more you talk about it, the more it looks like an excuse.

Yang Jian listened very quietly, and seemed not to listen at all, standing absent-mindedly by the side of the road and waving.

"I regret it! I think it's all wrong," Li Bai finally admitted, and said to himself, "I didn't know it would become like this. How it happened, I really don't know."

"I don't know either." Yang Jian said.

An empty car pulled over and Yang Jian opened the door. Li Bai watched him sit in and drive away quickly, and then he felt a pain in his arm. It was Yang Jian who grabbed him and stuffed him in. took the back seat.

There was never a farewell, never a "take care", or whether we will see you again in the future, the door closed with a "bang", Yang Jian turned around and walked gracefully.

Li Bai poked his neck and looked, Yang Jian had already walked back to the edge of the parking lot, it was the red Yamaha!It is still there, Yang Jian's movement of stepping up is as smooth as before, it starts as soon as it sits firmly, and it rushes out as soon as it is started, the engine has been on for a long time, and it still roars like a fierce horse, the motorcycle rushes to the front of the taxi, Not to mention turning around, Yang Jian didn't even pause.The evening rush hour has almost passed, and there are even fewer cars entering the city to the east at this point. The road is empty and wide, and at the end is a red sky. The shape of the sun has disappeared. behemoth.

Yang Jian was actually very painful.Li Bai suddenly came to a conclusion.Abnormal calm, that is fake, Li Bai himself has a lot.

At the red light, the motorcycle had to stop, less than 50 meters ahead.

Yang Jian is also very lonely.

The evening is bloody, and his back is scarred.

So where is Yang Jian going? With her sister's ashes on her back and her mourning clothes still on, "Ignorant", "Troublesome", "People grow up", what are they talking about.

...Could it be!

"Hello?" The taxi driver knocked on the window, "Where are you going?"

"Go to Wanquanhe Road, Furongli No. 111 next to Wanquanhe Road!" Li Bai suddenly realized, goosebumps all over his body, and cold sweat was streaming down densely. Losing his mind, "Follow that motorcycle, the red one with the tail number [-], you must follow him!"