I am not worthy

After Xu Zhan met Huo Yi that day, he never went to look for Bai Yan again, but sent back all the things Bai Yan had left on him.

Huo Yi didn't care much about these Bai Yan's personal belongings. On the day he brought Bai Yan back, Bai Yan said that he wanted to take them as a salute, but he didn't agree, but he thought it was troublesome and deliberately made things difficult for Bai Yan.Now that Xu Zhan had brought it eagerly, he sneered a few words in front of Bai Yan, and then forgot about it.

Bai Yan put his things back into the bedroom he used to live in - although he now sleeps in Huo Yi's room every night, for him, the room he used to live in made him feel more secure.

Not paying much attention to other clothes and the like, Bai Yan took out a notebook with an orange cover from the bottom of the box, stuck it to his chest and hugged it tightly, as if it was the only existence that gave his heart something to rest on.

This is a diary, Bai Yan has the habit of writing diaries.No one listened to him since he was a child, so he told himself and wrote it in the diary. The diary is like a friend of his, and all the thoughts that cannot be expressed can be written on it.

Bai Yan gently stroked the orange cover and stared at it for a long time, but he finally didn't open it, but put it on the top of the bedroom bookshelf.

The phone vibrated, and there was a notification that a text message was coming in. Bai Yan took the phone and clicked on it. It was Xu Zhan who sent it, and sent three messages in a row.

Xu Zhan: Did you receive everything?See if there is anything missing?

Xu Zhan: If you need anything, you can tell me, don't be polite.

Xu Zhan: I will save the room you lived in. Whenever you think it over and want to live in it again, you can do it anytime.

Holding the phone in his hand, Bai Yan gave a short laugh, and soon his eyes dimmed.He didn't reply to Xu Zhan, put away his phone, and didn't delete the three text messages.

Huo Yi has to go to work during the day, so Bai Yan is alone at home. He cooks breakfast and dinner twice a day, and sometimes cooks for himself at noon, and sometimes Huo Yi will order takeaway for him—all this seems to have returned to when the two first lived together.

But Bai Yan knew in his heart that everything was different from that time.

For example, he will no longer take the initiative to serve Huo Yi with food, nor will he take the initiative to prepare lunch for Huo Yi to take to the company.He no longer offered any suggestions, only when Huo Yi asked him to do something, he would do it.

Bai Yan no longer actively expresses himself in front of Huo Yi, he even hasn't smiled for a long time.During the day, there were few times when he showed emotion, except that when Xu Zhan sent him a text message, a warm current would flow through his heart, and the corners of his mouth would turn up slightly, showing a little happy expression.

Although Xu Zhanren no longer came to Bai Yan every day, he sent him text messages every day, either to encourage him, or to send some interesting and interesting stories, and what's more, to share his trivial things about Rishan and Changzhong.

such as.

Xu Zhan: I ate a fish with pickled cabbage today. It tastes very good. I will take you to try it next time.

Xu Zhan: I met a British short on the road today, very similar to the stray cat you picked up in the old playground when you were a sophomore in high school, do you still remember?The nose is white, and the blue on the face separates from both sides of the eyes like a horoscope, very cute.

When Bai Yan saw these text messages, he would feel very warm in his heart. Although he never replied to Xu Zhan once, Xu Zhan's text messages unconsciously became his daily expectation.

On this day, Huo Yi came home from get off work, and after eating, he pulled Bai Yan onto the bed to do some exercise, and Bai Yan was so tired that he fell asleep.Huo Yi didn't leave Bai Yan behind as usual, and went to the bathroom to take a shower by himself. He bent his legs and sat on the head of the bed, lit a cigarette and started smoking.

Next to his other leg was Bai Yan's peaceful sleeping face, Huo Yi turned his head slightly and stared for a long time, the expression on his face could almost be called gentle.

Huo Yi stared at Bai Yan's face for a while, then stretched out his hand to wipe away the sweaty hair covering his eyes, his eyes stopped at the slightly red corners of his eyes.He stared for a moment, then lightly removed the red corners of his eyes with his thumbs, and touched the traces of wetness, Huo Yi's eyes darkened.

——It was the tears that wept just now.

Put your thumb to your lips and lick it, a little salty taste.

The expression on Huo Yi's face softened unconsciously, and he fixedly stared at Bai Yan's sleeping face.This person is like made of water, tears seem to flow endlessly, obviously he has done it so many times, but every time he moves a little more violently, it seems that he can't bear it, and keeps crying .

Neither begging for mercy nor resisting, just crying.

But he didn't know that when a man is in this situation, the more he cries, the less he will stop.

In addition, his skin is fair, and he has a constitution that is prone to leaving marks. With a little force on his hands, his skin will turn red.After each round, there was hardly a single piece of intact skin on his body, which made Huo Yi unconsciously feel that he was abusing him.

"I just want to bully you, and in the future, you can only bully me."

Huo Yi's palm covered Bai Yan's face and stroked gently, his voice was low and almost gentle.But he didn't know that the way he stared at Bai Yan at this moment was tenderness that he had never felt before.